[ Author's Notes: I wrote this a day after my cat died and really needed something to relate to, so that it wouldn't feel like I was so alone, so I wrote this. Maybe that's why it lacks a lot of feeling and detail -_-' This fic is pretty bad but hopefully you will be able to understand what's going on from my obscure references :\ Also, I don't have the Clow Card Fortune Telling Book so I don't actually know the meanings of the cards... I just made them up ^^; ]
If It's Hurting You by Margot - December 6 2000
"Sakura-chan, please know that I'm here for you." Tomoyo gently reassured her friend by putting her hand on her shoulder. Eriol stood silently behind them.
Sakura didn't respond. She stared at the hospital door blankly, turned the doorknob, and pushed the door open.
The hospital room was empty, and Tomoyo and Eriol instantly went to different corners of the room, gathering up things like pyjamas and brushes. Sakura went to the bed, and dragged her hand over the blanket towards the pillow, which she picked up and stared at. She squinted hard, trying to fight back the stinging in her eyes, but it was no good. Tears began streaming out of her eyes and she pressed the pillow gently against her face.
"How long has she been in there?"
Tomoyo shook her head slightly. She was sitting alone in Syaoran and Sakura's apartment, outside their bedroom. Although now, truly, it was only Sakura's apartment, and only Sakura's bedroom. Eriol had just come.
"Since I got here... probably before that. I went into her room and tried talking to her, but she didn't acknowledge me." Tomoyo gripped the arms of her chair tightly. "It's like Sakura-chan is asleep with her eyes open."
Eriol's eyebrows furrowed. "We'll just have to try again then, won't we." He knocked on the bedroom door quietly, and when there was no answer, pushed it open and went in. Tomoyo followed behind him.
Sakura was lying on the bed above the covers, staring at the ceiling. She didn't seem to notice her friends come in. "Sakura-chan..." Tomoyo started quietly, "Sakura-chan, Hiiragizawa-kun is here."
Sakura didn't respond.
"Sakura-chan..." Tomoyo's hands balled into tight fists. "Sakura-chan!!"
Sakura still didn't move, and Tomoyo bit her lip. Her fists trembled.
"Daidouji-san..." Eriol put his hands on her shoulders. "Let me talk to Sakura-chan."
Tomoyo's fists tightened momentarily, then released in defeat. Her shoulder sunk, and without giving Eriol another glance, left the room and almost slammed the door shut. Eriol sighed. He knew Tomoyo was feeling angry, and perhaps even jealous... after all, it should Sakura-san's best friend to comfort her. But her best friend didn't have magic powers. And right now, it seemed like some of those were necessary.
He turned back to look at Sakura. She still hadn't moved, but after a moment, he realized that there were tears streaming from the corners of her eyes down the side of her face.
"Sakura-san, don't be mad at Daidouji-san. She's trying her best to be there for you."
There was still no response, except the clenching of Sakura's fists. She continued to stare blankly at the ceiling.
"You're feeling an immense darkness inside yourself. It's painful, isn't it. But... it will go away. I know you're giving up on yourself. But don't."
Sakura still didn't seem to respond. There was a silence, then without moving anything but her mouth, she spoke. "How do you know that."
Eriol smiled gently. "We're joined by more than just friendship, you know. I know you better than you think I do. My other self is your father... we're joined by blood."
Once again, there was no response.
"Would you like me to do a card reading for you? And we'll see what the future holds."
"...who cares."
In spite of her response, Eriol looked over to the desk and, upon spotting the Sakura cards, picked them up and sat down on the floor with them. He began spreading them out in seemingly random patterns. Finally, like a machine, Sakura got up and sat on the side of the bed, and wiped the corners of her eyes, staring at the cards Eriol was laying out on the floor.
"Hmmm."
"What?"
Eriol looked up and smiled simply. "I thought you didn't care."
Sakura didn't reply.
"Look at this," he indicated towards the cards, "you've experienced a great loss. You're suffering much emotional trauma... the Dark and the Maze are positioned together. You're feeling vulnerable right now... the Shield is upside down, right next to the Sword, which is rightside up. But here..." he indicated towards another group of cards, "you have friends and family who are here for you." He then pointed to the Time, "And eventually..." then to the Light. "Eventually you will heal. And you will learn to love again."
Sakura stared at the cards. Her lower lips trembled, and she covered her eyes with her hands. Eriol held her arms and gently lifted her to her feet, then put his arms around her.
"Sakura-san... you will learn to love again.
"Everything will always be alright."