I often wonder why things happen the way they do. Was/is it destiny? Fate? Was is meant to be this way? If past events changes, what would happen? A paradox? Heh...no wonder I'm laughed at...I sound ridiculous.
Before you ask, yes, I'm a "nerd." You know, I'm that person who is "smart" and actually gives a shit about my grades. I'm that bashful girl who sits in the back of the classroom wearing glasses and praying that the teacher will not call on her to answer a question. I'm the one who dares to be different, unlike those whom are to afraid to be themselves. I don't try to hide who I am...I let it be seen.
My name is Pascal Smith. I am a thirteen year old girl whom lives with her family in the small town of Ironton, Ohio. I have medium length brown hair that reaches my shoulders, and bright blue eyes that usually sparkle with an untrue happiness. Of course, I do have friends and they make me happy, but that is only at school, and half the time it is just a mask. A mask I wear to protect my friends from my true feelings that might hurt them. For some reason, I just don't feel like I can trust them with my secrets...they know a few ones, but I wouldn't be upset if they got told to someone. Don't get me wrong, I love Alice and Michelle dearly, but...I don't know how to trust them nor how to make myself trust them.

Anyways, enough of this silly introduction. I'm sure that you'd much rather get to the story that you came to read. This is my story. The story of how I met this wonderful man called the Doctor who took me away from my life here and on an adventure. This is the tale of how I found out something very important about myself.

2-4-13
Dear diary,
I was laughed at yet again, today. I don't understand why though. What have I done to deserve this? I mean...I know that I am clumsy, but I try as hard as I can! They have no right to laugh, point, and make fun of me. They don't know me! I...guess I don't even know myself, to be honest. Who am I? Who is Pascal Elizabeth Smith? I just hope I can find out soon. I don't know how much more of this I can take.

Sincerely,
Pascal.

As I finished writing my diary entry for the night, I quietly closed the leather covered book and placed it back where it belongs on my bookshelf. Sighing, I gazed out the window. Was I truly meant to be like this? Broken...scared...alone... and worst of all, having my heart breaking into more and more tiny pieces that I feel can't even be put back together anymore? I felt as if I was going to cry. It hurts...it really does. I'm always made fun of for stupid reasons. Being "smart," "clumsy," "useless," "hated," "alone," and so much more. Hell, who am I kidding. Because of this added and unneeded stress and the depression I fear I mau have, my grades are starting to drop signifigantly. I just...I can't focus anymore. There's too much on my mind.

Of course, I haven't told my friends. Alice and Michelle have enough problems without me piling anymore stress on them. I don't want them to worry about me, when I know that I will be okay...I hope.

Returning my focus on looking outside, I noticed something new. I had to squint to see it correctly. What was that...? A...box...? A blue bo- No. A blue POLICE box, to be exact. I feel as if I have seen it before, but not here...in this exact place. I could feel something telling me to investigate it...to try and figure out about it. Then again, when do I listen to my gut? This box has never been here before. Could it be a new decoration from a neighbor? If it is, why does it look like it was supposed to be hidden? I didn't know, but I wanted to find out. Just...not tonight. School has me worn out.

As I moved to pick up one of my favorite manga, Death Note, a loud yell filled the air.

"Pascal!"

Oh no...what does my mother want now? Don't tell me she saw my grades...that wouldn't turn out well. Slowly, I stood up and cracked the door open.

"Y-Yes, mother?"

My voice slightly wavered with fear. Oh, yeah. I never told you all, did I? I am absolutely terrified of my mother. I'm not sure why, though. She's never physically hurt me...yet. Right? She CAN be kind of violent sometimes...mostly when drunk.

"Come here!"

Once more, I hesitated but walked down the stairs. When I got down there, my mother stood by the door, anger, regret, and sadness being the emotions that were shown on her facial expression. Mother looked like she was going to cry, yet she looked so positively terrifying at the same time. Her dark brown hair was in a messy bun, her bangs casting a shadow over her bright blue eyes, making them look nearly nonexistent. All in all, her expression was grim, and that is all I needed to know that this is not good. It was terrifying me...especially the glint in her eyes.

"Is...Is something wrong, mo-"

"Shut up!" Snapped the woman.

What?

"The police called. Your father won't be coming home, today." Her voice seemed pained.

What on earth was going on? Not coming home today? Did they get into a fight? No, the police wouldn't be involved if that was the problem. My blue hues were full of confusion.

"Your father...he was on his way home from work when...he was at a stop sign. Pascal, your father was hit by a drunk driver. He...He didn't make it."

Wait...What? Didn't make it? Is...Is she saying that he...

"What do you me-"

"He's gone, Pascal."

A soft gasp escaped my lips. My dad was...dead? How could this have happened? No...he can't be dead. He promised me he wouldn't leave me here alone...he promised me.

After a moment of silence, mother walked back down the hallway and into her room. I could see a tear making it's way down her cheek, but I said nothing. Tears were welling in my own eyes, too.

Without saying a word, I walked outside, passing her along the way. I noticed the silent tears were streaming down her face, leaving me shocked. I had never seen my mother cry. Then again, if your husband had just been killed, you would be crying too. I walked out the door that leads outside, slamming it shut on my way into the chilly, fall air. I didn't understand how to react to this. You know how something upsets you to the point where you can barley cry? Yeah. That's how I feel. However, as I got closer to my destination and memories kept appearing in my mind, I had to swallow the lump forming in my throat. Choking back tears, I looked at the small pond I had found once more and sat under the old tree that was there. Looking at my own reflection, I felt truly alone. Now, it was just me and my mother...my sister lives in England. Heh...I remember when she moved there. "I want to live somewhere else! There is nothing here for me!" And with that, she left. I wonder if she knows the news, yet? No matter. I'll just...sit here and collect my thoughts for a bit.