Author's Note: Okay, this is something I have wanted to do for a while. It is a series of one-shots unrelated except for one common theme. You should be able to catch on to what it is. Enjoy.
Busted
Chapter One: The Gumbo
Lavon was sitting on the couch watching TV when he heard the door. A clearly agitated Wade came in and shot Lavon a death glare,
"You owe me fifty bucks."
"I'm sorry, what?"
"You heard me." Wade headed over to the cupboard and grabbed a sleeve of Ritz crackers. "Go on and get your wallet. I'll wait."
"Why exactly do I owe you fifty bucks?"
"Because, I took your stupid advice," he said bitterly. He tossed cracker into his mouth, then started counting off on his finger "bought a clean, nice lookin' shirt, twenty bucks, got a haircut, five bucks, gave Zoe Hart a free bottle of wine which will take fifteen bucks out of my paycheck, and all it bought me was a front row seat to watching Zoe give Judson a two and a half minute tongue bath."
"That's only forty."
"Well, the extra ten is for damages to my ego."
"I didn't know your ego could be damaged." Lavon said with a chuckle. Wade, however, was clearly not amused.
"I'll take cash or a check. Your call."
"Wade-"
"Two and a half minutes. Right straight in front of my face. Doc and the vet playin' tonsil tennis. Two and a half minutes."
"You counted?" Wade shrugged. Lavon let out a sigh, "I'm sorry. That … that sucks."
"I don't want your pity or your apologies. I'm a big boy. I can deal."
"Then why you tellin' me?"
"I thought I made that obvious. You owe me fifty bucks." Lavon rolled his eyes and shook his head.
"Sure you don't just want to vent. Maybe I can help."
Wade snorted, "Whenever I take your advice, it backfires, okay, I'm either wastin' a night at the airport stuffin' myself sick, or I'm spendin' money on shirts to wear to a little play called Zoe and Judson Make Out a Lot."
Lavon sighed again, "I'll go get my wallet."
"Thank you."
Zoe was still flying high. She had not kissed anybody in a long time. Well, except Wade, but that didn't count. She had been drunk the first time, and caught by surprise the second, and besides, it was Wade. But kissing Judson, even if she had done it to cover for AnnaBeth, it had been nice. It was a good kiss. A really, really good kiss in fact.
She headed for the main house, eager to share the day's events with Lavon. He wasn't in the kitchen, so she figured she'd check his room. She was about to knock when she heard voices.
"Who the hell keeps their wallet under their bed?"
"We all have are methods, and I can change my mind about the money anytime, so insultin' me ain't that smart." There was a pause, "Listen, I know you don't want anymore advice, but I'm gonna speak my piece anyway."
"Lavon-"
"Just let me talk, all right. I know that you are goin' to be mighty tempted to be an all around ass to Judson and Zoe, which, while immature, is also your way, but who knows how long she'll even be with Judson? And even if they … I don't know, get married or whatever, it doesn't matter. The fact is, you want to be in her life, you gotta be a friend, even when it's hard. You act like too much of a jerk, you're gonna push her away to the point where she ain't ever comin' back."
"The Doc doesn't consider me a friend, okay. At most, she sees me as an annoying neighbor."
"Naw, now, don't say that. You two are friends, no matter what you say. Ya'll hang out, three of us share meals, you're friends." Silence. "If you weren't her friend, you never would have made that gumbo back in-"
"Hey. Hey. I thought we don't talk about that."
"Relax, she's not here. Though how she didn't realize it was you and not me is still lost on me."
"Look, me doin' stuff for her makes her my friend, doesn't make me hers."
"Well, maybe she just needs an opportunity to, uh, make you some gumbo. Metaphorically speaking of course."
Zoe stood there, speechless. Wade had made her gumbo. And he didn't think she saw him as a friend. And he had made her gumbo! How did she not know this? Why didn't he tell her? Why didn't he want her to know so badly?
Suddenly, she got an idea, and an evil grin formed on her face. They wanted to keep a secret, fine, but she wasn't going to make it easy for them.
It took an annoyingly long time for Lavon and Wade to come into the kitchen.
She had all of her ingredients out, and when she heard them coming, she turned around and pretended to look busy.
"Uh, doc, what are you doin'?"
"Cooking." She said, nonchalantly.
"Uh, why?"
"Because, well, you remember that Gumbo contest when I first got to Bluebell, and how I placed second, well, the Gumbo that had my name on it placed second?"
"Uh, yeah." She looked at Wade through the corner of her eye. He had squirmed for a second. That was good. But it was going to get so much better.
"Well, I would like to win for real next year, not just because I have a friend awesome enough to do that for me. So I figure I should start practicing."
Wade chuckled, "No offense doc, but it'll take more'n practice to make you good at makin' gumbo. It'd take a freakin' miracle."
"Hey! I resent that. I am a great cook." Total lie, and she knew it. She did know a few things though, a few what not to dos, like what to avoid putting on or near the burner. Although, for her purposes, screwing up was exactly what she needed to do.
The smoke alarm started to go off. Right on cue, she thought, and did her best to act panicked.
"Oops."
"Oops?" Lavon asked emphatically, "Oops."
"I got it." Wade said. Once he had taken care of her little (intentional) mishap, she returned to her pot.
"Uh, what are you doing?" Lavon asked, eyeing her suspiciously.
"I told you. I'm-"
"No. Nu-uh. Not in my house."
"Lavon, come on, this is important to me."
"And havin' my home not getting burned down is important to me."
"Help me then."
"What?"
"Yeah. You could help me." she summoned up all her enthusiasm, trying to make it sound like she had just come up with the idea, "I mean, you made second place worthy gumbo. You clearly know your stuff. You could teach me."
"Um…" she noticed Lavon and Wade exchange a nervous glance. Good. Very good.
"Come on Lavon, you're my best friend. I'm just asking for a little help."
"Uh, Zoe, this may be a shock to you, but I actually have a life. Not to mention a job. I'm mayor, remember? There is a lot of responsibility that comes with that. I can't just drop everything-"
"I'm not saying drop everything. Schedule some time to work with me at some point this week. You have free time. I know. I've seen you playing videogames. If you have time to do that-"
"Lavon Hayes likes to use his free time to relax, and cookin' ain't exactly-"
"Look, I'm doing this, so either help me, or risk fire trucks parking outside every other day until I get it right."
"You're kidding right?" Zoe shrugged.
"Doc," Wade said, joining the conversation. She could not wait to see what he would come up with, "Cookin' is a skill, it's not as simple as followin' a recipe, especially for somethin' as complicated as gumbo. Either you have a knack, or you don't, and," he chuckled, "you don't."
"You sound like you have some experience in that area. Do you know how to make gumbo Wade?" she was using the most innocent, play-dumb voice she could muster. The look on his face almost made her burst out laughing. She would have to remember to thank her mom for forcing her to take those acting classes in high school, because there was no way she could have made it through this with a straight face otherwise.
"Um, no, not really."
"But you offered to help me."
"I what?"
"Don't you remember? You said your Uncle Mo had a Gumbo recipe, and you offered to help."
His eyes were looking so panicked. Zoe really did not remember the last time she had had this much fun, "Yeah, well, see, when I said that, what I meant was, was that uh, you could, you know, use his recipe."
"But you don't actually know how to make it."
Wade shook his head, "What can I say, our resident Gumbo maker is Lavon. He's the, uh, expert on the stuff."
"Well, if he's that expert, he should have no trouble teaching me."
She turned to Lavon, "Let me know when you can show me. Oh, and if you still haven't found the time by this time next week, I'll just work on it on my own."
She left the room before he could argue, her smirk growing wider with every step she took. When she was out on the porch, she finally let out the giggle she had been suppressing, but then she calmed down as quickly as she could. She could not risk them hearing her, and she did not want to miss anything. After they thought she was gone, they would start to talk, which was exactly why she had downloaded an app that could turn your cellphone into a listening device and charged it this morning. The front door was too thick to just press your ear against.
"So, what do we do?"
"Why you askin' me?"
" 'Cause it's your mess. I'm just covering for you." Silence, "You know, we could just tell her the truth."
"Not an option. Okay. Here's what we're gonna do." Silence.
"You plannin' on finishing that sentence?"
"Just … just give me a minute, okay."
Zoe put her hand over her mouth to keep from laughing
"Okay, here's what we do. We go to all the markets in the area, buy up all the gumbo ingredient, and hide them somewhere. She can't make you teach her if all the stores are out."
"Please tell me you're kiddin', because I can think of at least five reasons why that plan would never work."
"Okay Mr. Know-It-All, what do you suggest?"
"I suggested honesty. You rejected that suggestion."
"Yeah, and then I made a suggestion you rejected, so now it's your turn again."
"I stand by my honesty suggestion. In fact, it might even work in your favor, what with the whole Judson situation."
"No. I told you, that's not an option."
"Why not?"
"Because if I wanted her to know, I would have told her already.
"Okay, and the logic behind that is-"
"Look, it's just … it's just not somethin' we're gonna do, all right."
"Okay, but you better figure out what we are gonna do, and soon, or else you gonna be payin' for supplies to rebuild my kitchen."
She heard Lavon head toward the door and as quickly and quietly as she could, started off the porch and over to her carriage house. She could not believe what a big deal they were making of this? Why was Wade so desperate to make sure she never found out? Well, whatever the reason, it was certainly entertaining, and like Lavon, she was eagerly awaiting finding out just what Wade would come up with.
"No, I told you, this goes in first. Geez, Lavon, have you ever cooked anything before?"
"Hey, we've been up all night, okay. It's almost six. I'm not exactly on my game."
"Well, you better get on your game, if you're gonna get good enough at this to teach Zoe."
"Wade, I have my talents, ribs, eggs, pancakes, but gumbo ain't my thing."
"Which is why we're makin' it your thing. You think I'm not tired."
So that was the plan, huh? Wade was going to teach Lavon to make the gumbo. Not bad, but she was not letting them off the hook that easy. One way or another, she was getting a confession.
"Good morning." Zoe said as she entered the kitchen. The caught-with-your-hand-in-the-cookie-jar looks they had were priceless.
"You're up early." Wade choked out.
"I could say the same for you two." She headed over to a cabinet and crabbed a coffee mug.
"Yeah, well, we, uh-"
"Are those gumbo ingredients?" She said, pretending to have just noticed the medley of vegetables and the like spread out on the counter.
Wade's eyes went wide, "Um-"
"Oh, that is so sweet."
His eyes what from wide to confusion, "Um, what is?"
"Lavon getting up early to teach me to make gumbo."
"What, uh, what makes you think that's what's goin' on?" Wade asked, shifting uncomfortably. Lavon still hadn't said anything.
"Why else would he be up at five-thirty a.m. with gumbo ingredients spread out? That is so nice Lavon. I knew you would figure out a way to find the time."
She saw the two boys exchange a look. That's right, panic, suffer. Okay, so maybe she was getting a little mean, but they could end this any time they wanted. All they had to do was fess up. If they didn't, well, then they had nobody to blame but themselves.
"Well, um, I guess you two should get started then." Lavon looked at Wade, wide-eyed. Wade gave him a look that said, you have a better idea.
"Hey, why are you up?" she asked, turning to Wade.
"Um, Lavon wanted me here incase you burned the house down or something." His voice was teasing, which meant he was back in his element. That was not okay. She decided to let it slide though. They were her friends after all; it was not like she was trying to hurt them.
"Oh, so you'll be here to burn with it? I guess I can see that. Lavon would be ridding the world of a horrible plague."
"You know, if you do set the house afire, maybe I'll just leave you in it."
Zoe rolled her eyes, then turned to Lavon, "Okay, let's start. What do I do first?"
"We, uh …" she looked at him expectantly. Then, she felt motion behind her, "Oh, we chop."
"Okay, chop what?"
"Um, we chop the uh," Lavon tried to look over her shoulder casually, "vegetables? No, forget that, not the vegetables. We don't chop those we … take pictures of them?"
Zoe looked at him like he was insane, and she had a feeling that behind her, Wade was doing the same.
"I mean, we uh, throw them?" she heard Wade smack his hand on his forehead. It was not hard to figure out what was going on. Charades, huh? Clever … sort of.
"You know, it don't matter what we do with the vegetables now, 'cause we ain't there yet. Right now, we just need to chop the … chicken." This Zoe had to see. She turned around as fast as she could, and Wade did his best to fold his arms as quickly as he could. Still, she had not missed the wing like position they had been in seconds ago.
"What the hell were you doing?" she asked, not even attempting to hide her laugh.
"Don't know what you're talkin' about doc."
She made a show of looking between him and Lavon "You two are really weird sometimes."
After chopping the chicken, they took care of the vegetables, which apparently had to be diced. As horrible as Wade and Lavon were at this (she made a mental note to never play charades with either of them) they were starting to get into a rhythm. She figured they might, which is why she had been giving Wade drinks of water whenever she could do it casually. It was lucky that gumbo took a long time to make. The subtle hydrating seemed to be working; Wade was starting to squirm. Zoe turned on the faucet and got herself a drink, running it was long as she possibly could without it seeming weird. Wade was trying to look anywhere but the faucet, and he looked slightly pained, "You okay Wade?" she asked casually.
He shrugged, "Sure."
Uh-huh. Right. "You want a drink?"
"I'm good, thanks."
"You're not thirsty?"
"Nope."
"Because you look a little pale, and nothing is better for that than a nice cool glass of water."
"I'm really fine."
"You shouldn't let yourself get dehydrated. As a doctor, I can't allow it."
"Trust me doc, dehydration is not my problem." He squirmed again. She knew that as much as he did not want to leave Lavon on his own to handle her, he would not be able to hold it in much longer.
She headed back for the faucet, "Well, I'll get you a glass, and if you don't want it, you don't have to drink it."
"Doc-" he started, put then she turned the knob, and she saw his resolve crumble, "Um, I'll be right back."
"What?" Lavon asked, turning to him.
"I gotta, um, go."
"Where?"
Wade gave him a look, "To China. Where do you think? My bladder's about to burst here."
Lavon looked conflicted.
"Okay." Zoe said. Lavon winced, "What, it's not like we need him here. He's just standing there gulping down glasses of water. If I start a fire, we can scream. The bathroom isn't on another planet."
"Thanks doc." Wade said, and didn't wait around for Lavon to say anything. Zoe giggled.
"What so funny."
"Oh, nothing." She said nonchalantly, "So, let's get back to work. What do I do next?"
"Uh …"
Wade put the fire extinguisher down, "There, it's out." He looked annoyed. "How did this happen."
"I swear, I did exactly as Lavon told me." and she had, but she was not very surprised that things had gotten out of hand. Lavon clearly knew nothing about making Gumbo.
Wade sighed, "Not your fault. Could have happened to anybody."
Zoe nodded, "I appreciate that. Although, it's strange, because everything was going so well before, despite some of the bizarreness of some of Lavon's instructions."
Wade nodded, "Guess it's just one of those things, you know. Some stuff just happens, nothin' anybody can do about it."
"Well, there would have been one way to avoid it."
"Yeah, what's that?"
"Next time, instead of coming up with such a ridiculous ruse, you two could just tell me the truth about who actually made my gumbo, and then none of this would have happened." Wade stared at her, his mouth open, "Also, next time you want to keep a secret, and you decide to talk about it, don't just assume I'm not home. Check." Wade kept looking at her, utterly stunned, "I'm going to go wash up. See you guys later."
She headed out the door, unable to suppress her smile (not that she wanted to) as Wade just stood there dumbstruck.
She came into the kitchen, freshly showered, and found Wade rinsing some of the dishes. She headed over to him and picked one up. Then she grabbed the dish soap.
"That was mean, doc." He said, once he noticed her there. He didn't sound angry though.
"Well, that's why I thought I'd help clean up. Peace offering."
Wade nodded, "Fair enough."
"Still, you have to admit, you kind of brought it on yourself. I mean, I gave you a million opportunities to come clean. All you had to do was tell me, and we could have avoided this whole thing."
"Yeah, but then you wouldn't have gotten to have your little laugh, so in a way, I did you a favor."
Zoe laughed, "Hey, now that the cats out of the bag, can I ask you something."
"Shoot?"
"Why'd you do it? I mean, we weren't even friends yet then."
"Yet? As in we're friends now?"
"I just put you through hell and now we're talking amicably. If we're not friends, we're both out of our minds."
"Well, I know one of us is."
"So? Why'd you do it?"
Wade shrugged, "You'd had a rough first couple weeks, made a lot of enemies, lost credit for that arm thing. You had been drivin' yourself crazy over that dumb competition. I figured you deserved a break."
"Why didn't you just tell me then?"
Wade sigh, then put down the dish he was cleaning and turned to her, "Doc, what do you remember about that week?"
"Um, I saved a guys arm, got bit by a snake, got a new receptionist, and got my first patient."
"Uh-huh. And what about our little interactions? What do you remember about those?"
"Um, you got me bitten by a snake?" He winced a little, "Sorry, I didn't mean to-"
"No, you're right. I did. And I'm sorry about that." She smiled, "Anything else?" She shook her head, "You remember your little catchphrase?"
"I had a catchphrase."
Wade nodded, "I mean, you changed it up a little each time, but the gist was the same." She looked at him, waiting, "must have been, five, six times in three days you said to me the words, 'Wade, I don't need your help.'" Her eyes widened, and she mouthed the word, oh, "I mean, sometimes you'd leave my name out, but there was a lot of 'I don't need your help' 'I don't want or need your help,' and my personal favorite, 'I don't need your advice, help, or Alabama lovin'.' " Zoe smirked. She didn't remember that one, but she could definitely see herself saying it. "Let's just say I got the point."
"But if you had told me, then I might have-"
"Then it would have been about me tryin' to prove a point or gettin' you to admit you needed me or … I don't know, gettin' some sort of gratitude. That wasn't why I did it. I just wanted to help. You know, make things a little better for you. Get you to … smile or whatever." He figured he had said too much, so he went back to the dishes. They were almost done anyway.
Zoe took in what he had said, what he had done for her, and she smiled. She put down the dish she had been working on, stood on her tiptoes, and kissed Wade on the cheek. Then she put the dish in the drying rack. Wade stood there frozen for a second, "Why did … what was that for?"
She shrugged, "Guess I just wanted to … make things a little better for you. Get you to smile." He looked at her, slightly dazed, "Goodnight Wade."
She started to head for the door, but before she opened it, she turned around. He was watching her, this strange, sort of goofy look on his face. For some reason that she didn't understand, it made her heart jump a little, "And Wade."
"Yeah doc?"
"Thanks."
Author's Note: I was not sure what kind of Gumbo Uncle Mo's recipe was (not that I know anything about making any kind of gumbo) so I tried to find constants in recipes. I used ehow and wikihow.