Minecraft is not a game. It is life.
…For some people.
The disease called Minecraft includes horrible death-causing side effects like, well, never doing homework again. Thankfully, most manage to dodge that side effect, at least me. And I'm not dead (yet), so I'll say that this disease has actually been quite pleasant.
Minecraft can also be used for a bit of ego-petting. I am a very creative person, you say. So I choose creative as my game mode! Survival—I know how to survive, I should use this one. Hardcore—lol, I have hard abs. Can't beat that, can you.
The game is also very informative. Educational. (Psst! Psst! Show this part to your parents!) For instance, when you delete a world, the screen delicately informs your uninfected, delicate, innocent mind, "Do you really want to delete this world? 'Insert World Name Here' will be lost forever! (A long time!)"
It so enlighteningly explains that forever is "a long time."
I don't know about you, but when I first saw this, I thought it was REVOLUTIONARY.
But seriously, because of Minecraft, I discovered what "taiga" meant. And "sugarcane." (Is this normal?). And "aggravation."
Another important thing that Minecraft taught me, was, life hates you. Because right when you need to run away from that frighteningly enormous hoard of monsters that are slobbering after you like a bulldog after a bone, your game glitches out and you effectively are hit by a spaz attack. And then, 3349 miles away from your home, you are ripped into pieces, your bones are licked clean, and the stack of iron you so meticulously mined out for the past 2 hours is good as gone.
Yes, kids; life hates you.
Minecraft also teaches you that a never-ending supply of energy is possible.
If you place a sign under water, the sign WILL NOT GET WET.
If you dive into water from 3 hundred some blocks high, YOU WILL SURVIVE.
One major thing it taught me was to be afraid of the dark.
Anything I'm forgetting?
Your fist is strong enough to punch through wood; in fact, it lasts longer than a diamond axe :O
If you're so enhanced by Minecraft survival, you can go onto Youtube and look up Minecraft and you'll get a bunch of replies from scandalously hilarious Youtube personalities that you will learn lots of new cuss words from.
And lots about the environment. Because by now, you must have figured out the first thing you do when you spawn in a survival world. As the sun is still high in the sky, you must punch the crap out of the trees in such a way that you will probably be fined by various environmentalists for decreasing the time between now and the peak of global warming. Minecraft, it's a good influence.
Then you must transform this wood into planks by an invisible craftbench floating beside your head. But as soon as you get four planks of wood, you must create an opaque, tangible craftbench so that the world does not think you have gone mad, with your invisible one.
From there, make a wooden axe so you can kill more trees and drastically increase the prospect of an environment apocalypse even more.
Then make a wooden sword to kill innocent animals that have done nothing to hurt you but you simply wish to kill, 25% for the food and 75% because you just feel like it. And, of course, so more concerned environmentalists can get on your case and you can lose more money. Oh, the joys of Minecraft.
I love this game. I just really had to put this out there.