Lucy doesn't understand.
One minute they're celebrating, the next everyone is screaming and crying and there's dragons killing everyone.
How did it come to this?
Why?
Why why why why why why?
A three letter word, why couldn't anyone answer her?
"I'm sorry, Luce."
She never wanted this to happen.
"I really am."
Natsu. Why is he apologizing?
Take care of Happy for me, eh?"
Why is he smiling?
"I love you."
Why is he giving her that damn smile of his when he's hanging from the jaws of a monster?
She hears a scream, but from whom?
"NATSU!"
Her right arm burns, searing hot pain shooting up the limb. It hurts so damn much.
A peice of white frabic flaps through the wind quietly, as if there were no traces of existence on it. There probably isn't.
She realizes the scream came from her.
Where is Natsu? Why is his scarf in her hands, covered in blood?
Natsu Natsu Natsu Natsu Nastu.
Where's that grinning idiot? Where's that dumbass who always gets in trouble and laughs it off afterwards? Where's her Natsu?
Realization hits her hard. It leaves her breathless. Fat, hot tears create rivers on her scratched cheeks.
No.
She claws at her arms, hoping, praying, that this is a goddamn dream and Natsu isn't fucking dead because she was too damn weak to protect herself.
Natsu isn't dead.
Natsu isn't dead. Natsu is supposed to be smiling and laughing, is supposed to be living.
Lucy is selfish. She wants Natsu. She wants to give him a big hug because he's so warm and comfortable and dear god she misses him already. She wants her Natsu back.
"You can't die, idiot!" She finds herself screaming. "You can't leave me alone!" The dragon flies away, satisfied. Why?
Natsu can't be dead. He needs to find Igneel again. He needs to make amends with Sabertooth.
He needs to come back because there's no fucking way that she'll continue her life without him.
"Lu-chan?" A hesitant hand is placed on her shoulder. Levy, a voice at the back of her head murmurs, though she ignores it.
Everything hurts. Everything hurts so fucking much. She briefly acknowledges the fact that she lost her arm, but she doesn't care.
Natsu's dead and gone and it's her goddamn fault.
Her body is numb. She can't even summom the will to move. She hears another pair of footsteps coming towards her and she can feel the cold, frosty air around them. Gray.
"Isn't flame-brain supposed to be with you?"
She bites back a wail at the nickname and tries to shove her emotions away because she needs to help the others but it fucking hurts.
She doesn't realize that she's sobbing, ugly and loud, until Levy hugs her from the front. She doesn't say anything.
She doesn't want too.
It doesn't take words to understand what happened. Gray grits his teeth, his fists and jaw clenching to the point the skin turns white and looks to the side. She sees the sadness, anger, fear, pain and rage swirling in his eyes. She can also read the hidden snarl and statement.
"That fucking idiot."He growls, eyes glossy and shining with tears. There's anger behind his words, but he's also dying inside.
He grew up with the matchstick since he was seven and considered him a brother ever since. An annoying little brother, but still a brother. His last words to him were: "Fight me, you moron!" before everything turned to shit. Flame-brain would never be able to fulfill his request.
Lucy doesn't understand. How could he look so peaceful and smile when he was on the verge of death? Did he know? Did he know that he would get himself killed?
She doesn't want to understand. She just wants Natsu back. Crying isn't going to bring him back home, though.
She takes a step back, sniffling. Her eyes are puffy and red and her hands are wet with blood. "Eclipse." She hiccups. "We can bring him back." She murmurs.
The pain, it's burning and kicking up a storm underneath her skin, but she's going to save Natsu. She'll make sure of that.
Wait for me.