I own nothing but the story.
As the leader of the ninja, Cole often took it upon himself to constantly be on the lookout for dangers, whether they be small or tall. Things were different, he noticed, when the danger was living with them.
It had only been a week since Sensei Wu returned from the netherworld with the incarnation of evil breathing down his neck, and the man had already settled into a...for lack of a better term, comfortable routine. He would live with the ninja until they got his son, and until then, he was to stay out of trouble. While Garmadon agreed he wouldn't do anything to put more dirt on his name, the team watched him like they would a bug under a microscope.
So far Garmadon hadn't done much of anything. It was almost surprising; while Cole had had limited interactions with the demonic villain, he'd been under the impression that Garmadon would take any chance he could to get ahead. That wasn't to say that Garmadon didn't do anything to them. He certainly did get under each of the ninja's skin, whether it be by eating living beetles for dinner (that memory still brought the taste of bile to Cole's throat), or by tossing around balls of plasma in the middle of the night. But as far as doing anything that was actually evil, Garmadon was staying in his lane, and that made Cole both optimistic and suspicious.
While each of the ninja were doing their part in keeping an eye on their guest, Cole made it his duty to always keep Garmadon's presence at the forefront of his thoughts. As the unofficial leader of the team, he felt it was his responsibility to always be watchful, even when the danger was being a decent guest and not that bad of a housemate.
So Cole would study him. He wouldn't hover over him, like Kai did, or leave him completely on his own and assess the consequences, like Sensei did. He would just sit and watch the man from afar, studying his behavior, his moods.
This was how Cole reached a question that burned through his mind every time he so much as looked at Garmadon.
"How do you do it?"
Garmadon looked up from a year old newspaper he found, "What?"
The frown on his face looked no more annoyed than usual, so Cole took the invitation to ask again, "How do you live with four arms on your body?"
Garmadon didn't answer right away. Instead, he stared a hole through Cole's skull as the seconds ticked past. For a moment, Cole was reminded of a mean-tempered cockerel he used to walk past everyday, who would stare Cole down as he wondered by before kicking up his spurs and attacking. Cole swallowed and sent a prayer to whoever was listening that Garmadon wouldn't behave the same way.
Cole tensed when Garmadon's brow furrowed. "Don't tell me," he said, "You're..." one hand tapped at his chin, another drummed over the chair's armrest, and still another held the newspaper aloft. Finally, Garmadon smiled, "Zane! You're Zane, right?"
A single eyebrow twitched as Cole tried to figure out whether he felt flattered or insulted, "Uh—no, I'm—"
"Don't tell me!" Garmadon closed his eyes and feigned deep thought, "You're...Rocky!"
"What?!" Cole blinked and shook his head, "No, no, that's my dragon!"
"What dragon?"
"Can you just answer my question?"
Garmadon closed his newspaper with a violent flick and tossed it aside, sending it flying across the floor. A flicker of movement across the nearby door frame told Cole that there was somebody listening in the next room, likely waiting for a moment to come in and apprehend the villain. Cole took a deep breath and reminded himself who he was talking to.
"Um, you have four arms," said Cole, "How do you live with that?"
Garmadon scrutinized him a second longer before his frown melted into a devious grin, "Why, it's the same as you, my friend."
Cole's eyebrows rose, "Really? How?"
Garmadon barked a laugh, "You really don't know?"
Cole's lips drew into a thin line, and he reminded himself that Garmadon would likely grow bored of playing with him like this if he just continued to ask, "No. You're the only person I know with four arms."
The slight twitch at the corner of Garmadon's left eye didn't go unnoticed when Cole uttered the word, "person," but he replied easily, "Is that so? Well, I hate to break it to you, but you have four arms."
Cole sat backwards, trying not to let the annoyance eat away at him. At this point, holding a serious conversation with Jay seemed an easier thing to do.
"Oh really?" Cole said, cringing as some of his growing petulance creeped into his voice, "I have four arms?"
"Yes," said Garmadon, his voice smooth and saccharine, "You do. I do, everyone does!"
One thought rang through Cole's mind, "What?" he said.
Garmadon held up one large, black arm, and used the opposite arm to gesture from the elbow to the wrist. After a second, Cole got it.
"You have," he said, "Forearms."
A maniacal laughter erupted from the depths of Garmadon's throat. Cole folded his arms over his chest as he tried to register what just happened. A snort sounded from just outside the door, which was quickly stifled as the person remembered that they were supposed to be a ninja, and, respectively, quiet.
Wiping a tear away from his eye, Garmadon paused in his laughter to say, "Get it? Do you get it? I understand that humans are not the brightest creatures on the planet, but you can at least—"
"I get it," said Cole, "I just can't believe it."
A look of genuine confusion passed over Garmadon's features, "What?"
Cole huffed a small laugh at the strangeness of the situation, "Don't you realize? You just made a Dad Joke."
Garmadon frowned, "I'm not your dad. What's a Dad Joke?"
"It's a terrible pun made by a dad."
Garmadon suddenly jumped to his feet, causing both Cole and the person behind the door to widen their stance into a fighting position.
"That was not terrible!" Garmadon breathed, "that was comedy gold, and you know it!"
"Uh—okay!"
Garmadon scrutinized him, and asked, "Which one are you again?"
He sighed, "I'm Cole, Ninja of the Earth."
Garmadon took a second to blink before he burst into the laughter once more. Cole stared helplessly as the bemused house guest moved past him and towards the opposite doorway. He wanted to ask what was so funny, but the conversation was already tiring enough, and at this point he felt he might just be okay with never knowing what was going on in Garmadon's head.
However, as Cole slipped into acceptance, Garmadon stopped and gave him one final statement, "Your name is a Dad Joke, my friend."
He left the room and sauntered down the hallway. Cole listened until the man's footsteps had faded, and he sat with a flop on the vacated chair. He placed his chin into the palm of his hand and began to think about the whirlwind of a conversation he just endured.
A head of spiky brown hair peeked at him from around the other doorway.
"Hey," said Kai.
Cole gave a nod of acknowledgement.
At first Kai didn't say anything. Then he stepped into the room, and graced him with silence for all of five seconds before saying, "He is kind of right—"
"Oh shut up!" Cole stood and began to head towards their shared bedroom. As he moved he took a solemn vow to never engage in a casual conversation with Garmadon again.
Again, a huge thanks to everyone who has read and reviewed the stories I've posted on here. Your kindness really warms my heart, and if I could, I'd thank each of you individually (in the form of a song similar to that of Beauty and the Beast's Gaston). I hope you all have a marvelous day, and thank you for reading.
