A/N: Man I love filling this lovely little fandom with angsty drabbles about death. I don't know what that's about, honestly.I guess dragons bring out the morbid in me. This can be read as a follow on from 'Bleed Out' but makes about as much sense on its own.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Which is for the best, all things considered.
It has never occurred to him to wonder how many men he has killed. He's always aimed for the ships rather than the men, fired warning shots, intended to disarm not dismember. He's never really thought about those sinking ships, about the weight of armour and the slow agony of drowning. It's only when he sees the whites of this man's eyes that the realisation – of what it is to kill a man and what it takes to do it – dawns on him, slowly, like the dribble of blood down the furrow of his dagger.
Toothless has killed for him. Dozens of times, probably; he's probably doing so right now. Astrid, too, has always been there to do what he couldn't because Hiccup is a peacemaker, Hiccup is kind. Cowardly, Snotlout used to sneer, and the thought make his hand twitch on the handle of his blade. He has never been one to glory in the thrill of battle like the twins or Snotlout. Not that there was much glory in the way he's left them – all their youth, violence, joy drained from them the way that Snotlout's blood had drained into the soil.
He presses the dagger's tip a little deeper and watches the man's eyes widen. Once, he'd thought that killing was what made a Viking; dragons, men, whichever. Until he'd held this self-same dagger over the heart of the creature he'd both feared and come to love the most dearly, and realised that he, that that boy, wasn't a killer.
"You won't do it," the man's voice is slightly strained thanks to the dagger nicking his windpipe, but to Hiccup's ears it is still as arrogant and hateful as it has ever sounded in his nightmares. "You can't do it."
Two sets of eyes flick down to the dagger – at the way Hiccup's hand is shaking – and for a moment he is that boy in the forest again, poised to strike.
I'm going to cut out your heart and take it to my father.
Hiccup looks up, meets Drago's smug stare with his own
and
pushes.