Disclaimer: I do not own any Star Trek, naturally.
A/N: My favorite character is Chekov (I adore Anton) and this is just a little something my mind thought up.
It had started about three weeks ago with Spock requesting a meeting with Chekov at the end of shift. Dutifully Chekov had followed even though it cut into this dinner time; at seventeen he was still always hungry.
Spock had sat him down and proceeded to instruct him on the culture of Vulcan marriage. Chekov didn't understand most of what was said, or why any of it was said, but after two hours he thanked the Commander for his insight into this shy community and left to see if Hikaru had saved him any dinner.
A week after that he had been asked by Kirk to go down to Engineering to help Scotty with the warp core. When he arrived he noticed a large countdown sign that he had never seen before with the words LEGAL written up top and fifteen days, four hors, and seven minutes left in the countdown.
"What is that?" he asked Scotty who looked up alarmed.
"Ah, it is merely counting down the days til Angorian Pot is legal," he said and then bustled Chekov out of the main hanger, glaring at a few guys in engineering as he did so. This didn't explain anything to Pavel, who could find no record of Angorian Pot.
Four days after that, Uhura grabbed his arm as he was following Sulu to their regular table and asked if he could eat with her instead.
"Sulu-" he said weakly but Uhura just smiled at the pilot.
"Hikaru, you won't mind if I steal Pavel for tonight, will you?"
"Um," he said, glancing at an obviously distressed Pavel. "As long as it's only for tonight."
Sulu walked further down the cafeteria to sit with a few security personal and left Pavel to fend for himself.
"Here's a good spot," Uhura said, seating the two of them far away from the rest of the crowds. Pavel nodded and dug into his meal.
"I just wanted to talk to you Pavel," Uhura said, ignoring her own food. Pavel attempted to stop stuffing his lasagna into his mouth and listen to her.
"I just want you to understand that there's no need to grow up too fast," she said, her earnest face zeroing in on him.
"Ah, I think I might be a little late for this," Pavel said, trying to make a joke and go back to his lasagna.
"I mean it Pavel," she said, pushing aside both of their plates to take his hands. "I know you feel pressured to grow up but there is no need too. We all like you just the way you are."
She continued on like this for a full twenty minutes until his lasagna was cold.
A week passed and Chekov hoped everything was returning to normal when he received a PADD message directing him to attend a speech by Doctor McCoy in the lecture hall.
When he arrived, Chekov double checked the message to make sure he had read it right. He was the only one here. Cautiously he moved towards the seats and picked one in the center, alone in over a hundred chairs. A few moments after he sat down the lights cut completely out and an image appeared on the holovid on the stage.
GENITAL DISEASES AND YOU
Doctor McCoy then appeared at the podium.
"The purpose of this lecture is to discuss the devastating affects that sexually transmitted diseases can have on the human body."
"Um, Doctor," Pavel began, even raising his hand.
"There will be complete silence until the end of the lecture!" McCoy barked out and Chekov sat back in his seat, scared stiff.
"This first image," McCoy continued as a grotesque picture of deformed male genitals appeared on the screen, "Is of the Orion Clitascious Disease. It can be transmitted through salvia, intercourse, and dry humping."
The lecture continued for three hours with no break until Chekov was finally immune to the horrible images that accompanied every disease McCoy covered. Finally the lights cut off and when they relit a moment later, Chekov was alone.
Three days later Chekov walked onto the bridge, anxious to start his day. He and Hikaru had been up late last night watching old movies from the 20th century and he had not gotten enough sleep once he had stumbled back to his quarters. And this morning he would be coordinating a new path for the Enterprise. He was excited about this, as it meant they would be traveling through hyperspace all through tomorrow, so he would have a peaceful birthday.
Chekov saw Doctor McCoy for the first time since the odd lecture, the older man leaning across Uhura's station, pointing something out to her. He could often be found on the bridge during slow times in the med bay or even on his days off. Scotty was up there too, with a set of engineers, working on a piece of Spock's workstation that had been acting up the previous day.
Kirk entered the bridge a moment after Chekov had sat down and came up immediately to slap him on the back.
"So, Chekov!" he bellowed out, making sure the entire bridge heard him. "Got anyone special to take that virginity off your hands tomorrow?"
Laughing to himself, Kirk sat himself down his captain's chair, ignoring the angry looks from the rest of his command crew.
"Wirginity?" Chekov asked, incomprehension spreading across his face.
"Yes, it means-" Kirk stated.
"I know what it means," Chekov responded with a wave of his hand. "It is just-"
Looking around at the rest of the bridge Chekov suddenly started laughing.
"What's so funny?" Kirk asked, never happy to be left out of a joke.
"It is just-" Chekov managed to choke out, his accent more pronounced as he gasped for breath. "I have just understood what is happening. You all-" he paused for a deep breath, giggles still escaping, "You have all believed I was a wirgin and have tried to protect me. Is very funny."
Chekov continued to laugh even harder at the startled faces of the other officers.
"So, what you're saying," McCoy began. "Is that you've had sex."
"Da," Chekov responded, still laughing too hard to realize he had answered in Russian. "I have had sex; I just did not realize I had to kiss and tell."
Chekov's laughs died down, the rest of the crew now looking at one another with something like guilt or maybe confusion in their eyes.
"Of course, everything ended up pretty much told anyways," Pavel continued with an occasional chuckle, turning towards his navigation panel and beginning to input coordinates.
"What do you mean?" Kirk asked, always ready to be nosy.
"Professor Higgins?" Chekov asked as he continued to work.
"Higgins?" Kirk asked. "You mean the guy who moved to MIT last semester cause of something with a student?"
"I never understood that," Hikaru said. "Fraternization with students is frowned upon sure, but it's not illegal-"
"Not illegal with most students," Pavel corrected with a grin.
For a moment all that could be heard were the sound of Pavel's fingers tapping against his work station.
"You mean to tell me that Professor Higgins seduced you?" Kirk all but roared. "We can contact Admiral-"
Chekov merely ran his fingers through his hair a few times and finished punching in his calculations. He then slouched down in his chair slightly and turned to face Kirk.
"Ve are ready for warp, Keptin."
Kirk had never before considered a Russian accent sexy on its own, but combined with the soft vulnerable look in Chekov's eyes and his unaffected slouched, it sounded like sex on wheels. And from the sharp intake of breath from Uhura, Scotty's bitten lip, and the way Hikaru's back went rim-rod straight in his chair, Kirk wasn't the only one who thought so.
"And who said he seduced me?" Chekov said after a moment in his normal voice. "It was merely a matter of getting what I want."
With that Pavel turned to look at Hikaru with a smile that was not so much bright as blinding.
"And I am very good at getting what I want."