''Cherishing the Memories''
Not much of memories with her and yet every single second around her had turned into memories since she's gone. Still, he's thankful they hadn't made much of memories. It's already painful to cherish the not so 'me and you' memories. He wondered how he would have survived then.
Those countless stares in between duties had already occupied his mind so vigorously he didn't need those private stares sitting opposite each other in a restaurant. Now when he looked back he found she used to stare a lot. It was uncomfortable but somewhere deep inside him he used to cherish it, he used to feel it. It indeed felt- welcoming?
Now when she's gone, he's sitting there on a cliff alone remembering the memories, cherishing them. Surprisingly he ruled out he had a very rare contribution in their memories and yet he ruled the memories. She was the one falling for him first but slowly and he fell for her rapidly if not suddenly.
His phone lying on the mattress beside him was vibrating continuously. He didn't wanted to be disturbed. Not now. Not any other times when he's remembering her. Yet, with great irritation he turned to see the caller id.
Dr Tarika.
So Abhijeet had been tired of calling him and made Tarika to call instead. He silent the phone. Couldn't a man have his own time?
Keeping his phone aside he again looked at the vast open sky above him. His eyes didn't itch. He wished they would. If not pouring at least some drops could gather at the corner of his eyes. Drops of salty water. Crying was hard. Hard for him. He couldn't cry when she was leaving so it's useless to try crying now.
He's happy for not being able to make more memories with her. He really was. It would feel like a burden. It would have been harder to bear the weight. But sometimes he fantasised how it would have been if they had memories. Memories like other couple who're in love. Like, some stolen moments on work, random kisses, soft hugs, pretty gifts, soft music, long drives, and romantic dinner. It ached. It ached real hard when he thought. Perhaps he could have bear the burden.
He sat there for hours. It had become his habit now. Not so frequent but whenever he found time. He loved the calmness, the serenity of the weather around him when he just thought about her, thought about the happened incidents and also those, which never happened. Things were beyond fixation now and he knew it better than anyone else. And yet it felt good to think, to cherish the moments, to live them, to fantasize them.
He didn't know how long he gona keep these feelings, these memories alive in him but he didn't want them to go easily, not in near future. The ache in his heart is soothing. Something he believed he deserved.
Only if he could cry his feelings out. But he was not blessed with this amazing gift of human nature.
Stares. He only had some good long stares as his precious memories of her.
He wish he could have some more.
Some close moments.
Some hugs.
Some kisses.
Some words.
Anything apart from those pain filled stares.
But perhaps he could live with them.
Perhaps he could cherish them every now and then.
And no one would know. Not her. Not his friends. It was something only belonging to him.
As he realized the sun was about to set he stood up and folded the mattress. Keeping that inside his car he called his friend.
"Daya!!!!!'' Came a desperate voice of Abhijeet from opposite side.
''Can't you live me alone for a day?''
''I can if you let me know where you are.''
''On earth. ''
''You dared to joke after being untraced for more than three hours now.''
''I can explain.''
''You are better to.''
''I'm hungry. Let's eat pizza. My Treat.''
''I'm in mall already.''
''Just half an hour away.''
Daya cut the call and got into the car. He had to cook up a better story to convince Abhijeet on his way. No one's need to know his secret moments. It's for her. The very least he could do for her.
AN: Little short? I didn't want it to be boring. Being back on my track after this long gap is very hard. But I'm trying. Hope I'll progress soon.
Do review.