When Drifter sees Guardian, the first thing that comes to mind is hope.
To Drifter, Guardian was the embodiment of hope. When he saved Drifter and provided him shelter in the midst of another attack from his illness, that was hope. When he suggested that Drifter stay at Guardian's place whenever he wants, that was also hope. Hope that there was something left in this shambling world filled with blood, gears, and more blood.
Drifter had never been one to feast so much on hope. Like an adult too prune to eat desert, he looked the other way when the slivers of hope came across to him. He was a ticking time bomb and hope had no place in his world. Until that one fateful night.
He had just finished getting four modules from the east. He had pockets full of gearbits and a stomach devoid of food. His legs ached and begged for him to stop and rest but he kept on making his way back to Central. He wondered if any of the townspeople would mind very much if he were to sleep outside under one of their trees. He felt a bit safer if he were to rest near them since they all seemed like nice people, but he didn't really trust them enough to sleep too close.. Plus, Guardian's home was nearby. Not that it mattered of course.
Drifter let out a sigh of relief as the view of the town came into his vision. He drifter over to the nearest tree and slumped down against the trunk. He was starving and a bit cold but he could rest and that was all that mattered. Until a few plops were heard from above.
"Please no..", Drifter begged out loud.
A few plops of water turned into more and more until it was pouring heavily. The tree that Drifter was under was enormous, but the leaves were thin and did nothing to keep the treacherous rain from pouring onto him.
His teeth chattered lightly and he pulled his soaking coat closer around him in a futile attempt to stay warm. He closed his eyes and willed himself to rest. Rain? That wasn't so bad. He can totally sleep through rain. But after two hours the sweet release of sleep never came.
His chattering teeth stained red as another one of those awful but familiar coughs tore through his body. His vision went fuzzy as he shivered violently.
Drifter was so out of it that he didn't notice a figure approach him.
"I thought I told you that you were welcome in my home.", A familiar voice told him.
Guardian stood before him, tall and strong, like a pillar. It put him off the first time Drifter saw him. He was at least a foot taller than the man.
He looked sort of angry even through his helmet.
"S-So you did.", Drifter says back while trying to force himself to stop shivering to no avail.
"And yet here you are, sitting out in the pouring rain.", Guardian says. "I will not force you to come into my home but I do encourage it.
"I am fine out here. I-", Drifter says but is interrupted by a sharp cough that seems to pierce his lungs. Guardian is not startled by Drifter's cough.
"You are not fine. But as I said, I will not force you to come inside. I can't reiterate enough how welcome you are in my home though.", Guardian says. Guardian turns around and walks away and Drifter mourns the loss of that company. He felt so cold and hungry.
He stubbornly waits a couple minutes before he stands up and walks over to the man's home.
He walks in silently, feeling a pang of regret as his wet coat leaves water droplets on the floor.
He sees Guardian sitting at the table, almost as if he were waiting for Drifter to come in.
"You can leave your coat by the door.", Guardian said. His voice sounded relieved that Drifter was even there.
Drifter thinks about turning around and bolting out the door for a moment but the threat of that bone-chilling rain keeps him put. Guardian seemed like a person who could be trusted and that scared Drifter. He couldn't remember the last time he actually trusted someone. He takes off his coat and leaves it by the door.
He's still shivering as he takes a few more steps in and plants himself on a spot besides the table.
"Come sit down. I'll heat you up some soup.", Guardian says and Drifter does so.
He watches the other man ladle some soup in a bowl and place it before him.
"Thank you.", Drifter mumbles. He hesitantly takes the spoon and eats a bit of the soup. As soon as he took that first bite, his hunger seemed to explode. He became a ravenous machine as he ate the soup with no remorse.
"When was the last time you ate.", Guardian says concerned. Drifter forces himself to stop and feels his face go red at the display he had shown.
Drifter thinks about the question and hesitates.
"I'm not sure.", Drifter says honestly. He goes back to eating the soup, forcing himself at a steady pace.
"That's no good..You're always welcome to-"
"Stop.", Drifter interrupts Guardian.
"What?", Guardian asks confused.
"Stop doing that. I appreciate all of this but I can handle things on my own.", Drifter says.
"I do not doubt that. Life is a little easier with friends though.", Guardian says and Drifter feels his blood freeze. Friends? Oh no, what had he gotten himself into?
Drifter's stomach churns and he pushes the bowl away tentatively, unable to form a response.
"I'll sleep on the floor.", Drifter says.
"Nonsense, you're my guest. You can take the bed.", Guardian says.
"Thank you, but I'll be fine.", Drifter said stubbornly.
Guardian looked as if he were about to continue to argue but didn't.
"Alright. I'll get some blankets for you.", Guardian says.
Drifter lays down on top of three blankets with two on top of him next to Guardian's bed. The man looked as if he were already asleep but Drifter could tell that he was faking. Drifter forced himself to stay up for five more minutes, until the warmth and softness of the blankets soothed him and he fell into a deep sleep.
When he wakes up there is food on the table and Guardian is gone.
The two meet up plenty of times after this. Drifter often finds himself back into that same house, sometimes with Guardian there and sometimes with him not.
They exchange a few pieces of conversation and talk about the progress of finding all the modules.
Drifter found himself growing accustomed to the idea of having a friend. Guardian was polite and generous but also fierce and strong. That height that put him off before became something he grew to admire in the other. A pillar always came to mind. An unbreakable pillar.
"You have nightmares.", Guardian says one day. "Almost every night."
"Yes.", Drifter says as he looks down in embarrassment. He had always foolishly believed that Guardian hadn't noticed.
"Drinking tea helped with my nightmares. It doesn't always work but you should give it a try.", Guardian said as he opened up a cabinet and showed Drifter where the tea was. Drifter blinked in surprise. He didn't expect someone as strong like Guardian to have nightmares. But it just made him seem even stronger.
He and Guardian drink tea together many nights after that.
It was just all so strange and fresh. So off putting. He knew it was foolish to get attached. He would sometimes think how foolish it was of Guardian to get attached. There was always that guillotine dangling up above him. There was a chance that it would never go away, even with that perfect cell. One day he could be gone and Guardian would be alone once more. He wondered if Guardian knew. He wondered if it would change anything.
Despite these thoughts, he never wanted the other to go away. He was intoxicated with something, he knew it. Some weird concoction of Guardian's low rumbling voice mixed with the other's gentle but strong mannerisms. It made it impossible for Drifter to get him out of his head. He wasn't sure if he even wanted the other out of his head.
Sometimes when he'd go into that house and find it empty he'd take the Guardian's pillow and inhale the scent of the other. Tea and birch wood. Then he would cry. Cry for long hours as he felt something clouding over his mind that just wouldn't go away until he fell asleep.
One day after finding a bunch of modules in the north he found the Guardian's coat on the table. He looked around the house and outside to see if the man was nearby before wrapping himself up in the cloak and falling asleep on the bed.
When Drifter woke up he saw Guardian sitting by the table, staring at him with an unfamiliar look. Drifter felt his face heat up as he quickly untangled himself from the coat and handed it back to Guardian.
"I-I'm so sorry. I was just cold and didn't see you around and-"
"It's fine.", Guardian interrupts Drifter's sputtering. "It was honestly quite cute."
Drifter blinked at those words and felt his heart pound mercilessly in his chest. Guardian seemed just as surprised with is own words as the other was.
"A-Anyways.", Guardian says, "I found some more modules up North. It is quite cold up there so you can borrow my coat if you wish."
"Yes. I think I will.", Drifter forces out. His heart wouldn't stop that infernal rapid beating and he wondered if was part of his illness. Drifter wraps the coat around over his thin red coat and the two chat, both focusing on the coat in their heads.
It was little things such as this that would set off this churning of the stomach and fluttering of the heart for Drifter. After a while he managed to narrow it down in his head to Guardian. These things only happened when it related to the man. He was confused and a bit scared. Was his illness causing him to feel this way whenever he talked to the man? He didn't know.
He thought about asking Guardian about it but couldn't form the words to say what he was feeling. All that he knew was that he wanted to stay with the man for eternity.
It was when he made his way west that eternity shattered.
He had collected all the modules for north and east, so all he needed was to collect the ones from the west to move on to the south.
He hadn't seen Guardian in a day, and as usual the man occupied Drifter's mind.
So when Drifter saw Guardian up ahead, he couldn't help but smile.
"Guardian, I-", Drifter started but stopped when he saw Guardian doubled over, coughing up blood.
That strong pillar, so strong and tall was cracking right before his eyes.
His vision went hazy. All he could focus on was the blood splattered on the ground and that deep rumbling voice he had come to love making those horrid retching sounds.
He had always worried about himself not being there for Guardian, but now it might be just the opposite.
"Why didn't you tell me?", Drifter chokes out. His throat feels tight and his heart is beating a horrid beat. Not that comforting fluttering, but a tune akin to fear.
"I didn't want you to think I was using you, Drifter.", Guardian says. "I'm going to die soon, and I needed someone to finish getting all of the modules. I'll admit, it started off as a thing just to pass the torch on, but Drifter, you're very dear to me. We both have that guillotine hanging above us. You should understand."
"No. No, you can't have it.", Drifter chokes out. This was all wrong, everything was wrong. "Guardian, I'm going to find all the modules and find the perfect cell. When I do, we'll both be cured."
"Drifter..", Guardian says. Drifter knows that what he is saying is only a slight possibility. He knows that there's a chance that they would both die before then. But Guardian doesn't bring up the obvious.
They just hang on to that slight hope, embrace each other, and cry.