Bundyangel: This is a fic-trade for my friend on Deviantart:
Dark1408.
She is amazing. Go view her artwork.
Now.
Anyway, I apologize now as I don't have a very good grasp on Sai's character but ima try my darndest!
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Disclaimer:
I do NOT own Naruto or the song "If You're Not the One" by Daniel Bedingfield. I claim nothing of theirs. Me no claimy, you no suey.
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Key log a ma jigger
'This' is thoughts
'This' is inner selves
"This" is talking
These are lyrics
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The time We've Lost By Bundyangel (Bundyangel15)
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If you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?
Sai watched silently from his house as she walked by. Beaten, bloody, exhausted, and almost… horrendously ugly.
But she had come back.
Her left arm hung uselessly at her side, various bruises and scratches marred her usual porcelain skin and blood matted one side of her petal pink head.
But she was alive.
And she had come back, without the traitor. Another failed mission for her.
But his soul (if he actually believed he had one) soared at the sight of her, and a smile made its way onto his pale face.
Some dark part of him deep in his mind uncurled with possessive, malicious pleasure. He wasn't back, so she still needed himself.
If you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours,
This way.
Sai turned and bounded out of his house, quickly jumping to the ground and catching up with her.
Quickly, before she could realize what he was doing, he grabbed her glove-encased uninjured hand, and pasted a fake smile on,
"Hello, Hag." Sakura turned her head to him with a shocked expression on her face,
"S-Sai?! What the hell are you doing?" He simply smiled and shrugged,
"Walking you to the hospital. If you pass out in the street, people would be scared away by your horrendous appearance and you would die from blood loss. Then we would have a dead, rotting kunoichi in the middle of the streets. I'm simply performing a service to the public." He turned his head back forward and continued pulling on her hand gently.
Sakura blinked at him silently before hiding a small smile, and tentatively her fingers entwined with his and clasped them gently.
If you are not mine then why does your heart return
My call?
Sai looked to the sky during their silent trip,
"So, no sign of him?"
"No." The reply was breathed out on a broken sigh and he felt his newly discovered heart clench with a pang of hurt that she herself must feel every time she thought of him, and why she could never seem to make him love her back.
If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand
At all?
Sakura wasn't stupid.
She knew what Sai was doing, he did it every time she returned beaten, bloody, and arms empty.
She knew he felt something for her more then friendship, or as a teammate.
What she didn't get was why he insisted on this routine every single time.
She had never been around someone like Sai before. He was so calm and reclusive like Sasuke but he tried to be nice and social like Naruto. He confused the hell out of her.
She also didn't get why he simply never just came out and asked her for a date or anything. He only went as far as looking out for her and holding her hand,
One thing he never would do.
And maybe the fact that Sai did, and continued to do so was why she let him do it, and why she actually held his hand back this time.
Sakura realized long ago that Sai wasn't Sasuke. Wasn't his clone, and would never betray her the way Sasuke did every single day.
He had become her strength.
"Hey. Ugly."
I don't know what the future brings
But I know you're here with me now
She lifted the gaze she didn't know she had let drift to the ground and looked at Sai with a questioning gaze,
"What is it Sai?"
He was a silent a moment before he spoke,
"I don't know what the future brings, but I know that you'll find him. If not you, then Naruto. One of you will find him and he will be back, and then you wont be broken anymore."
Sakura's eyes widened at what he said,
"Sai…"
He was right. No one knew what the future would bring. She didn't know if Naruto or herself would bring Sasuke back, but she did know one thing.
Sai was here. He was there with her now, when no one else was.
We'll make it through and I hope you are the one I share my life with
Sai watched her silently out of the corner of his eye.
He watched the emotions ripple through her faded eyes and bruised face before a small content smile made its way across her lips, and she slid her eyes closed, trusting him to lead the way.
His heart clenched a bit. He wondered if it was the thought of Sasuke being back that brought that smile to her face, or of her bringing Sasuke back. But for some reason, he desperately wished it were him who made her smile. Made her content despite her pain, and understood her when she didn't say anything at all.
Would he ever be the one that she could depend on and give her heart to?
He often thought of Sakura, of her past, of her day, and her future. Would she be here 20, 30 years from now? It was a stretch for a shinobi life, but people had done it.
Would she get married?
To Sasuke?
To Neji?
To Naruto?
To him?
Would she have children? Would she raise beautiful babies with sparkling emerald eyes, dark hair, and just maybe a streak of ink on one cheek and a brush clenched in a chubby toddlers fist?
I don't Wanna run away but
Sakura gave a small relieved sigh as the hospital came into view. They were almost there.
It was getting to be too much. Sai was being so… un-Sai-like. It was weirding her out a bit.
It was confusing her and making her think of Sai in ways she shouldn't and didn't want to think of him.
She unclasped their hands and bid Sai a short farewell before running forward to the hospital.
Sai took a half step forward, uncertain, but remained where he was when he understood.
She didn't need him around right now.
His smile fell from his face, leaving its normal blank stare.
I can't take it
Sakura pushed down the guilt and hurt at seeing his face and uncertainty and continued to run forward to the hospital, pushing him to the back of her mind.
I don't understand
Sai understood, but at the same time he didn't. Why would she be so comfortable around him one minute and then brushing him off with a cold shoulder the next?
He thought they had made progress.
She had actual held his hand back this time!
Wasn't that… something?
Maybe she didn't think they belonged together?
If I'm not made for you then
Why does my heart tell me that I am?
That couldn't be! It wasn't right. The mere thought of that he didn't belong with Sakura, struck deep in his heart and made anguish wash over his form.
No!
It couldn't be that way; his newly found heart couldn't take an unrequited love.
Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?
Sakura stared numbly at the wall, unflinching and unfeeling as thoughts raced through her head.
She didn't return the medic-nins' idle chatter, nor did she flinch when they popped her arm back into its socket and begin healing the bruised tissue around it.
All she could think of was Sai and expression behind the ROOTS mask.
He thought she couldn't see it, but she could.
The small crack his emotions had made were a doorway for her to look through.
She saw the want, the anguish, the confusion, and the loneliness.
She saw it because it was exactly what her eyes showed every time she looked in the mirror.
She couldn't help but wonder,
'Would his arms be as warm around her body as his hand was around her own?'
'Stop it Sakura!'
Sakura snapped back out of her wondering thoughts to find an empty examination room, and her hand in front of her face.
The same one he held every time.
Swallowing the lump in her throat, she closed her eyes briefly then quickly left the hospital.
If I don't need you then why am I crying on,
My bed?
Sakura's chakra depleted and weary body fell heavily on her mattress. Groaning she pulled her pillow from it's place at the head of the bed and buried her face in it, arms wrapped tightly around it.
Why?
Why now?
Why of all times was she getting these feelings about Sai of all people?!
Sai was well… Sai! It didn't make sense, especially since she was so close to bringing back Sasuke. Even Sai seem convinced she would do it! Despite how much he disliked Sasuke.
Was… was she forgetting Sasuke?!
Not mentally of course, but possibly… emotionally?
Was that possible? That a love so strong and with so emotion put into it (on her side) could simply fade away with time or be forgotten?
Sakura crushed down a sob that threatened to bubble to the surface and pushed her face farther into the pillow, believing that if no one could see her silent tears then she hadn't lost control and let them slip through.
Again.
'Sai…'
The shattered remains of her heart held together by those two simple words from that fateful night cut through the empty promises and tumbled down to her stomach.
Broken once again.
If I don't need you then why does your name
Sai had made his way back home and sat at his open window, watching the ninjas jump by on missions in the fading light and normal civilians scuttle quickly to their homes before getting caught in the darkness.
He glanced up at the sky and sighed when his mind strayed again to the woman on his team who he couldn't forget.
The sky was dyed the exact same shade as her hair in the twilight. The stars twinkled with the same sparkle from her eyes he invoked every once in a while and the wind rushing past sounded like her steady breaths and lifeless laughter.
His short midnight hair danced into his vision as they became unfocused as he thought of a plan,
'Sakura…'
Resound
A choked sob,
'Sai…'
In my head?
'Why…?'
If you're not for me then
Acceptance sucked. Sakura tried uselessly to end the quaking of her shoulders and the tremblings that ran down her spine.
Shinobi never show emotion. What was she doing?
Showing emotion.
But then again, she deserved this didn't she? She wasn't crying because she wouldn't let herself do anything else. She wasn't crying because she believed that was the only thing she could do. She wasn't crying because the pain hurt so badly. She was crying because…
… Because she was letting go…
'If… If Sasuke isn't for me, if it'll never happen, then what will I do? I didn't go horsing around, flaunting my body at every male that crossed my path these past three years. I don't have that kind of relationship with anyone. Not that I'd really want one at this point but... where do I go from here?'
Why does this distance name my life?
If you're not for me then why do I dream of you
As my wife?
Sai stared across the buildings at her house. He couldn't actually see her, or her room, but if he leaned 3 feet to left out his window and squinted, he could just barely see the corner of her roof.
Don't ask how he figured that one out. It's a long, boring story.
But his mind was once again plagued. Plagued by the gnawing emptiness in his heart from the emptiness of his arms and his daydream again of her.
Her, and himself; And that little toddler with his affinity for art.
She would never know how much that little toddler in his mind lightened his heart and the thought of her belonging to himself exclusively made it soar.
And at the rate she was letting their relationship progress, his heart would never get to fly.
I don't know why you're so far away
He had honestly thought about it and it still didn't make sense to him. Why was she so far away?
Why was she curled up exhausted and probably still pained, by herself? Didn't she get that he was here? He was always here and he was yearning?
For even just a small brief kind of contact, one that was willing and heartfelt instead of one he had to take when she was at her lowest?
Maybe it was his lack of social skills that impeded him? Though somehow he doubted that.
It was something that, for once, she didn't get.
But I know that this much is true
Sakura slowly lifted her face from the now damp pillow and sat up, quickly wiping any stray streaks of wetness from her face with the backs of her hands. The energy she had just released combined with the lack of air circulation in the room made it feel hot and stuffy to Sakura.
Sniffling lightly she stood and stumbled over to her large window, pulling it open and collapsed onto her knees in front of it; relishing in the cool breeze.
Sakura turned her head and laid it down on the edge of the window seal, letting the short rosette strands dance and twine with themselves as she stared with glazed eyes at the sinking sunset. The pink and reds reminded her of herself as they slowly morphed into an orange only Naruto could be proud of before sinking into the dark blue that was oh so reminiscent of a certain avengers spiky hair. The low wispy clouds gradually pulled themselves apart to drift across the horizon, obscuring bright stars and the section of pale moon that began to glow luminescent as the night wore on.
Why could she see none of it?
'Maybe when one gives up on beauty in their heart they forget about beauty in their life?'
Sakura raised her head minutely and slid her arms underneath her cheek to serve as a pillow as she continued to stare blankly at the sky,
'This is new Sakura. You have to give yourself time, y'know? You just let go of someone you've loved for about 9 years of your life. Everything's not going to return to normal or be exactly how it has always been. You're not gazing through rose-tinted glasses anymore. Just rose-tinted locks. You had to adjust once he was gone from your presence, now you just have to adjust to him being gone from your heart.'
We'll make it through
And I hope you are the one I
Sai sighed and stepped down form the window and closed it, another sunset wasted yearning. Time for dreams or the equivalent that Sai had,
'It wont be like this forever, We'll make it through it all somehow.'
Share my life with.
Sakura fell asleep sitting next to the window, the breeze soothing her frayed nerves and rumpled emotions,
'Don't worry Sakura! We'll find someone who will treat us right! Chyaa!'
'I hope so…'
And I wish that you could be the one I die with
And I'm praying you're the one I build my home with
It had been a few days since what Sai knew Sakura referred to as the "incident" and things seemed to be doing better for Sakura, she seemed lighter, if not a little more hollow.
Sai wasn't sure what it was but he hoped he had helped in some way. Maybe not in the way she was hollow, but the brighter way.
Sai was expecting the ninja that clouded in next to him holding out a mission scroll and a summons to Tsunade-sama's office immediately. There was always something that interrupted him in his observations of Sakura, right before he got to the point where he would snap and tell her everything he felt like she deserved.
But alas, there it was and there he went.
Sai glanced through the scrolls as he habitually jumped from roof to roof.
B-rank. Solo unless otherwise requested. Three weeks.
Great.
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Sai coughed as he leaned against the tree, using the back of his gloved hand to wipe the blood from the corner of his mouth that threatened to spill down his chin.
He was going to die, and he knew it. But Sakura didn't. The whole situation was perfect.
Absolutely perfect.
He was a few miles from Konoha and he was going to die because the poison was making him paralyzed. The whole situation was ridiculous in his mind.
'This shouldn't have happened, I was supposed to be good enough to do this and get back to her, now I'm going to die here without her ever knowing? Pathetic.' Sai choked back another cough and forced his half numb legs to move, to push him forward, and to bring him back to her.
When the ground started coming up sharply Sai realized that he hadn't pushed hard enough and now he didn't have time to save himself,
"Fuck." He closed his eyes as he awaited the impact of the cold unrelenting ground.
"SAI!!"
Sai cracked open a tired, pain filled eye in time to see a blaze of pink and red before something war slammed into him.
I hope I love you all my life
'No…' Sakura stared, paralyzed as her mind blanked and all she saw was Sai, battered and bloody falling from the tree's he had tried so hard to jump through,
'No…!' His limp body started its deadly descent as if in slow motion and Sakura felt pain streak through her chest, unable to raise her arms to even clutch at her heart as it broke again.
'Sai… No!' Tears threaten to blur her eyes as suddenly her body wretched itself forward at a dead sprint as her throat burned and splintered forth a blood-curdling scream,
"SAI!!" Sakura threw herself forward in the mid air, body slamming into his with a grunt as her strong arms wrapped around him delicately and pulled him close, as she landed in a crouch, knee biting into the rough forest floor.
"Sai?! Sai what happened?! Wake up Sai! You need to talk to me!" Laying him gently on the ground Sakura flexed her impressive chakra control skills and immediately summoned life saving green chakra to her hands, running them over his face and body, searching for any problems and fixing them promptly.
"Hey there… Hag." Sakura snapped her scared gaze to his face to observe his small smile, and unfocused, pain-filled eyes.
"Sai…" Sakura forced back the tears that yearned to escape, as she looked deep into his eyes, hands working on autopilot, searching and healing as thoughts raced through her head,
"Are you okay Sai?" Sai laughed hoarsely,
"You're the medic aren't you? You tell me." Sakura smiled dryly before she felt something with her chakra and her head snapped around to here her hands were,
"You have two broken ribs and a poison running through your nervous system. Not to mention you tore quite a few muscles and your chakra is basically gone. Sai, what the hell happened?!" Sakura set to work forcing her chakra into his body, removing the poison first and foremost,
"Mission." Sakura rolled her eyes briefly before returning to her work,
"No shit Sherlock, tell me something I didn't know."
"I love you."
I don't wanna run away
But I can't take it
Sakura's entire body froze again; before wide-eyed and open mouthed she turned to stare at Sai in silent shock. He closed his eyes briefly before smiling again,
"At least, I think that's what it is. You know what love is Sakura you could tell me right? I always seem to be watching you, and thinking about you, worrying about you when you're on missions and-"
"Shut up." Sai snapped his eyes to her face at her quite, firm words,
"Sakura-."
"I said shut up!" Her bangs hid her eyes and most of her face; her lips were pressed firmly into a hard, unrelenting line, her jaw clenched so hard she could feel the muscle next to it jumping in agitation.
"You don't know what you're talking about. You don't love me, don't try and trick yourself into believing that." Her voice was a husky, vicious hiss and his chest clenched painfully at the knowledge that hateful tone was directed at him,
'Nothing's changed at all, huh?'
I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then
Why does my heart tell me that I am?
Sakura reached back into her medic's pouch and open a vile with one hand as her chakra transferred the poison from Sai's body into the tube. Corking it shut and replacing it in her bag she refused to meet his eyes as she continued to work,
"You're still going to be numb for a while as a side-effect form the poison, there's nothing I can do about that." She moved a hand to his lower chest and began healing the broken rips, ignoring his slight cringes of pain,
"So, how am I supposed to get back to Konoha then Doctor?"
"I'll have to carry you." Sakura shrugged the importance of that statement off with her shoulder as she continued speaking calmly, "So are you going to tell me what happened to put you in this condition?"
"What were you doing in this part of the forest?" Sakura's eyes finally met him as both they and her mouth shot sparks,
"Stop avoiding the subject!" Sai gave her a flat look,
"I can't tell you. Not only would it stress you out even more, under my mission's orders I can't say a word until I talk to Tsunade-sama." Sakura felt herself flush in embarrassment as she realized she was taking his vagueness personally when it was all about his orders,
'Please, as if there's anything he actually needs to hide form me. Why would a lack of information irritate me so much?'
'Because what you just saw scared you shitless.'
'You know that habit of not helping you have, Inner?'
'Yeah? What about it?'
'You're doing it again.'
'Fuck you.'
'Bite me.'
'If I could, with pleasure!' Sakura pushed her Inner self away as she refocused her attention on Sai, looking quizzical at his expectant stare. Glowering darkly at him she snapped out,
"What?!" He continued to stare at her,
"Well? Why are you here?" Sakura stared back,
"I was sent to come look for you." He was surprised and let it show,
"Why?"
"Because you were about three days late for the time you were supposed to return, and Tsunade-Shinshou became concerned, so she sent me to go scouting for you." Sai closed his tired eyes,
"I see." Sai wouldn't let himself acknowledge the twinge of pain in his heart caused by the knowledge that her concern stemmed from a mission, not her own feelings.
Sakura finally tore her eyes from him and moved from healing his now repaired ribs, to his torn muscles, in his right arm, abdomen, left thigh, and left calf. Deciding that was enough for now, She ignored the scratches and cuts that were purely cosmetic and stood fluidly, cracking her back and stretching out her arms.
Is there any way that I can stay
In your arms
Sakura leaned down and held out a hand at Sai,
"C'mon, let's get you back to Konoha so you can get some rest, and we can both turn our missions in." Sai stared at her a moment more and silently lifted his arm to hers.
Before her knew it she had grabbed his hand pulled him up and flipped them around so he was on her back with her hands tucked under his knees, and his arms tossed unceremoniously over her shoulders.
Sai's eyes widened as she started walking, thinking he was going to fall again before he leaned forward a bit and circled her neck with his arms in a weird pseudo-hug.
She had no reaction to his movement and made no move to speak so Sai relaxed, and rested his head on her right shoulder, looking at her from time to time out of the corner of his eyes.
'She's wrong. I may not understand all of my emotions but I am not mistaken on this one. She just doesn't believe I could love her. That's what this is. Love? Without a doubt.' Sai felt himself begin to slip into unconsciousness again from the stress and exhaustion he had been under and as his head turned on her shoulder into a more relaxed position he let the words slip out,
"You're wrong Sakura."
Cause I miss you
Body and soul so strong
That it takes my breath away
Sakura ignored his words, mentally unwilling to let herself respond to him and prove why he was wrong. She of all people knew what love was. He didn't. He should bow to her expertise on this.
Although her mind refused to respond to him, her body was a completely different matter.
As much as she wished to deny it, the smalls warm puffs of air from his breath on her neck sent small pleasurable shivers down her spine, and made her breath catch once in a while in the most delicious way.
Sakura then wondered; why exactly was she so against him believing he loved her?
As she walked silently through the dense woods of Konoha, she let her mind wander,
'It's too soon. It's only been a month since we let Sasuke go. It's not fair to punish my heart this way. I… I can't take the thought of believing that someone loves me when they suddenly find that… they don't. It wouldn't be fair to me or to him. I can't indulge this or let him do the same.'
'All's fair in love and war, babe. Which includes letting him follow his own feelings.'
'But… he can't! He just can't!'
'And why not? Is it because he's ugly? Because he's obviously a romantic and a bit of a pervert?'
'No! Don't go there Inner. You know as well as I do, that he's gorgeous. And though a little emotionally stunted, there's nothing wrong with him personality wise. I admit those all freely.'
'Then what the fuck is the matter?!'
'I'm scared! Okay?!'
'Finally, we're getting somewhere! Why are you scared?'
'Because… I don't want to break all over again. And I wouldn't have the chance to heal my heart by myself again like I did when Sasuke left. With Sai… I'd have to deal with him and the pain of my heartbreak caused by him every single day.'
'There's no guaranty that he will break your heart. He already firmly believes he loves you. Why don't you take a chance?'
'I can't.'
'Why not? What's holding you back?'
'I don't know!'
'Yes you do! There is no reason except excuses and an irrational fear! Even if he does, not that I'm saying he will, you've got me! And we've always been able to pick up the pieces!'
'I… I just don't think I could handle being broken again.'
'With him, I don't think you would have to.'
'You really approve of him, don't you Inner?'
'I really do.'
And I breathe you
Sai pulled himself into a fuzzy consciousness, aware enough to realize he was still with Sakura, and they were almost to Konoha, but not enough to decipher how far or to make conversation.
'She smells nice, like… some kind of citrus. Something bright and happy.' Sai took another breath of her entrancing scent,
'Just like she is.' He enjoyed the rest of the trip wrapped up in his own thoughts and her scent, unaware of the mental battle she was having involving him.
Into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today
Sakura made quick work of the distance between her position and Konoha, barely registering that once she entered the city she headed strait for the hospital, completely on autopilot.
He was still unconscious as she entered the hospital and under the direction of a concerned Shizune, deposited him in some room on the 3rd floor for observation, the poison being foreign and a sample of which they had never encountered before.
She slumped in the seat next to his bed, staring blankly at the machines, beeping a message that annoyed most but meant 'Alive' to her ears.
'So you think I should give him a chance.'
'No, I think you should accept his feelings and give yourself the chance to reciprocate them.'
'Then what should I do?'
'Love is your 'expertise' isn't it? What should you do?'
'Blurt out my heart and misgivings, dropping all emotional and physical barriers and pray he doesn't knock me unconscious?'
'You, you're so funny. Why you're a ninja and not a comedian, I'll never know.'
'The sarcasm is greatly appreciated Inner.'
'I know how much you love it.'
'But seriously, what should I do?'
'Exactly what you said.'
'You've got to be kidding me.'
'Hey, I'm not the comedian here. But besides that, I think telling him your feelings and misgivings, doubts, and worries is the best way to get this relationship off the road. If he can deal with your emotional trauma and still love you, then we know he's not confused about the whole thing and truly means what he says.'
'I just hope this doesn't end up hurting me further.'
'Me too.' Sakura snapped her attention back to the present as she looked down and noticed him wide-awake and staring at her mutely.
She gave a small smile and leaned forward, and set her elbows on the bed next to his arm as she rested her head on her propped hands and looked over his face,
"How are you feeling Sai?"
"Fine." Sakura tensed but forced herself not to appear surprised or move as he raised one arm and absently played with a section of her chin length hair. Staring at it with almost a fascination on his face, he twined it around his knuckles and fingers.
Sakura's eyes softened at him and she smiled a little wider before relaxing and sighing in contentment. His eyes returned to hers and Sakura believed that there was no better time then the present,
"Sai. I think we should talk."
"No." It was said so forcefully that Sakura's eyes widened and she drew back until his firm grip on her hair prevented her from withdrawing any more,
Cause I love you
Whether it's wrong or right
"If all you want to do is try and convince me that I don't understand what I feel, then we don't have anything to talk about. This… feeling isn't something I just realized and struck upon. I've felt this way for a while."
"Sai… that's not what I-…" He cut her off again as he stared hard into her eyes, determined to bare his heart, desperate for her to understand what he felt for her.
"I care deeply about you Sakura, and even though I know you were hurt just as deeply by the traitor and you'll probably never let him go I want you to know that there's more men in the world than that prick. One's that wont betray you and stab you in the back."
"Do you know why I hold your hand after you return from every mission? Because I've been too much of a coward to ask for the formal right to do so. So I do it in a twisted form of comfort. I gave you those nicknames because I was informed that people like nickname's that have nothing to do with them. I don't actually think you're ugly or a hag. You're one of the most beautiful people in my life, and I apologize if that for even one moment you actually believed I meant that."
"I think about you when I shouldn't Sakura. When I'm in the middle of a mission or I wake up. I see your eyes in the stars and your smile in the sunlight and I feel your presence everywhere. I've imagined a future that we'll never have, and I've fell asleep dreaming of you so many times I've lost count."
"I anticipate the times that we have missions together or get to train together because then I'm actually around you, even if I'm not with you." Sometime during his declaration of love his eyes had slipped from her face to stare at the ceiling, but his hand never relinquished its hold on her hair,
"And I realize now how much Sasuke hurt you. I realize now that no matter how the fact that I am here, and that I care, you will never be able to move past his memory. You'll never let yourself have happiness, and you'll never give me a chance." Sai whispered the last part and finally his hand relaxed and slowly let go of her hair as he let it drop back to bed.
Sakura caught his hand with her own and entwined her finger with his; faintly curious about when she had started crying. As his gaze fixed itself back on her face in surprise, Sakura smiled at him and shook her head as she leaned farther forward,
"You're so stupid sometimes Sai… So stupid." Sakura crawled up next to him on the bed and buried her face in his neck, much to his surprise, and clutched their entwined hands close to her heart.
Sai didn't know what to do as he felt her hot tears drip on his neck and shoulder, scalding him as he retraced what he said trying to find what he had said to hurt her to the point that she would cry. He was stunned again at her next words,
"If you had let me finish, you would have known I wasn't going to deny your feelings, but return them."
And though I can't be with you tonight
You know my heart is always by your side
Sai could feel the happy smile that spread across his face as he closed his eyes in contentment, bringing up he other arm to slide into her hair. He slowly began running his fingers through the silken strands as she tried to get her tears under control again, slightly ashamed at her breach of control,
"Sakura…" She shook her head against his shoulder,
"Shut up Sai, I'm not done talking yet." Sai smirked lightly as he slid his arm from her hair to her waist and pulled her closer possessively.
"I… I've already given up on my emotional attachment to Sasuke, Sai. I gave it up almost a month ago. I realized that even if we brought Sasuke back, he still wouldn't love me. He'd probably dislike me even more for standing in the way of his revenge. But I'm scared Sai." She unconsciously tugged their hands closer to herself, if it was possible,
"I'm scared that I'll be hurt again, I'm afraid that I'll break so hard this time that I won't be able to pull myself back together." Her voice dropped to a whisper, "I'm terrified that I've forgotten how to live with a unbroken heart." The hand around her waist tightened and tugged,
"Then we'll have to learn together then." Sakura turned her face to his, bringing their faces within inches of each other,
"I'm still learning how to feel, and I don't know how to live with love either, but I'm more than willing to learn that with you." Sai shifted towards her and brought the hand that held her waist up to cup the side of her face,
"I would never do anything to intentionally hurt you Sakura. And if I do in fact do something to break you again, I'll spend the rest of whatever life I have helping you put it together again." Before Sakura even knew what he was doing, he tilted her face up slightly and lowered his, sealing their lips in a warm kiss.
Sakura's mind shut down and she melted into the kiss, submerged in the feelings it created and engulfed in the flames it sparked.
They parted reluctantly and Sakura breathed his name out on a low sigh,
"Sai…" He surprised her again when he slipped his other hand out from her grip and brought it around her shoulders pulling her forward and crushing her to him in a warm embrace. She sighed happily as she slipped her arms around his neck and pulled him to her just as fiercely.
I don't wanna run away
But I can't take it
I don't understand
If I'm not made for you then
Why does my heart tell me that I am?
Is there any way that I can stay
In your arms.
"Hey Sai? Did you know if you stand on the corner of my roof and lean outward a bit you can see your window?"
"No, Sakura, I had no idea."
"Really? I'll have to show you sometime."
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Bundyangel: How's THAT for a one shot neh?!
Yeah, I've found that it's basically impossible for me to write a cute Lil oneshot. It's a one chapter of course. But its like a 4-chapter story squished into one XDD
Anyone, I apologize for any spelling or grammatical errors, and I'm really sorry if any of the characters are out of character. Like I said I don't know Sai's character very well.
I hope you like it Dark-chan!
Tell me what you thought everyone!