Hello all!!! I haven't written here in a LONG time! Anyway, here goes. my
shot at an Inu-Yasha Angst fic. Reviews are welcomed, but not mandatory!!!
This is a one-shot I sent to a con by my house. anyway, please enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Inu-Yasha, nor any characters within. T.T I wish.
***
The time has come. These are my final waking minutes. It saddens me that they should be spent in fear and pain instead of joy and contentment. Yet I knew this was coming, and I've said my goodbyes, though perhaps some were hidden in the disguise of false hope. After sleepless nights, and much thought about my options, I have come to the realization that this is the best plan of action. My friends, who have been there with me, helped me so much, to grow and to change from an immature girl into a cultured woman. they mean more to me than life itself. And so, I plan to give my life for theirs. But onto the farewells, for if I begin to reminisce about my past I will miss my Golden Chance.
First was to my Mother. she knew what I planned to do before a word escaped my lips. She held me close that night, as I told her everything, confessed my innermost dreams, desires, and even fantasies that I would never have the chance to live out. I remember my mouth becoming dry as my words flowed. I told her things I wasn't clearly aware of until they burst out; my envy of Kikyo, my petty jealousy of Sango, and even the way I felt about Inu-Yasha. I remember crying into her shoulder as particularly painful or tender subjects were discussed. She just held me the entire time, and listened with only a few words in between. I was always afraid that if she started talking, I wouldn't have the willpower to keep going. Morning came after many exhausting hours, and she tucked me into bed and let me sleep. She was truly my best friend, always there to offer advice, ease the burden of traveling between two worlds, or to give comfort when it was needed. I am truly blessed to have such a caring mom.
For Souta and my grandfather, I only told them how much I loved them, and how I would miss them. I didn't tell them that this time would be different. I couldn't be there when my brother found out; it would be far too painful. I couldn't have asked for a better little brother. He would go out of his way to pick up my homework at my high school when I was gone. He would ask for my help when he started liking girls, and he would always try to get me to play his video games with him, even though he knew I didn't understand them. Grandfather, senile though he might have seemed, was a truly respectable man. He charmed me as a child with his old Shrine stories and myths, some of which I now find are true. He always had a great imagination, and of his willpower I am still in awe. I will miss both my grandfather and brother greatly. Perhaps mom is telling them right now, what I really plan to do. Of course, I guess it isn't a plan now. This is reality.
I cannot forget Kaede, the woman who had acted as a counselor, friend, a helping hand and had offered me a place to call my home away from home these past few years. I'll never forget that she was always there to mother me. My favorite thing about returning to the village was being able to eat her fabulous stew. I'll always remember the particular flavor her "secret ingredient" added. It's hard now to think of her as the same hard working woman she used to be, for old age has begun to take it's toll more severely now. I don't think she is completely aware of her surroundings anymore. I hope that she lives well until the end of her days, and that she gets taken care of properly, although I'm sure Sango and Miroku will look after that.
I feel privileged to have had the opportunity to have traveled with such awesome and honorable people as are the duo team of Sango and Miroku. Miroku can be a trickster sometimes, but his general aura of benevolence makes him easy to forgive. I will miss his wry humor, and his ability to withstand pain. He always seemed to be so upbeat, although he knew that death was near, waiting to consume him by the hole on his right hand. I have noticed that he has become quiet as of late. I think he is worried about finding a woman to bear his heir. He'll be so happy when this final battle is over.
Sango. I can't even begin to explain what she means to me. I don't believe a stronger woman exists in all of Japan, yet even so she is as gentle as a lamb. She seems to be so mature, perhaps from the circumstances that led her to join us, or maybe it is an integral part of her personality, but it has saved both of us time and time again from the breakdown lurking in the shadows. Despite that, or perhaps because of it, she has been able to form a strong relationship with Miroku. She was so apprehensive about him, because of his wandering eyes and wandering hands. Now they are very close, and I know that he will be a good person for her to turn to once I've left them. I wish them luck, and I wish I could be there to see how their relationship progresses. They'll have a lot of work once I'm gone. To them I owe a life of happiness.
I must admit I have not seen two people I would have liked to before I go. Kouga and his tribe have been great help over the years, and Kouga has a special place in my heart, though perhaps it isn't the one for which he yearns. I have always admired his bold exterior, as well as his outspoken demeanor. I've always thought that it must be hard being the young leader of a demon wolf pack, although he seems to be very good at it. The second person is Inu-Yasha's half brother Sesshoumaru. Perhaps I am imagining things, or maybe I'm the only one that's noticed, but I have never believed that Sesshoumaru was a real threat. I think he was trying to help his little brother in his own way - the only way he knew. I have yet to thank him for his kindness, though I have no doubt that he would be less than willing to hear it.
I am glad that one person who has managed to worm his way into my heart is not here to see me. Shippou is a mature child, sometimes so much so that we forget that he is a child. It was the general consensus of our little group that he should sit this battle out. I'm glad he did; otherwise the grief would have been too much for everyone to bear. I hope that one day he will go seek out more Fox demons like himself; to learn about his true heritage.
I look now, in my last moments, to see Inu-Yasha staring back with his confusion clearly written upon his face. All he sees is a dear friend being consumed by his hated foe, and making no move to stop her imminent death. I have said nothing of a final goodbye to him, for if I did, I would not have the courage to end this now. I take one last look at the face of the man I loved, the face that has haunted my thoughts and dreams without mercy.
I still remember exactly what I thought of him the first time I saw him. He held such a peaceful expression on his face. His cute dog ears and white hair threw me off at first, making me wonder exactly what he was, but I was sure that he wouldn't hurt me. Well, I would have been sure of that if I had been sure he was alive.
After he had been released from his fifty-year slumber, he changed into someone totally different. He was brash, crude, and egotistical, yet I knew he was looking out for me. As I took my last, long looks at him during this last week, I realized exactly how much he has changed from that boy he once was. He is now more trusting of people as a whole, and far gentler and more civilized.
I can't remember when I started to fall for him. It must have been a few months after we had met, although I felt strongly for him as a friend before that. When we had quiet moments, at night or when our small group was separated, he would talk to me in earnest. He was always frank with his opinions; a blessing as well as a curse. I learned so much about life from him and that led me to admire and care for him all the more. I loved the way he would carry me, when we were chasing a demon, or when I was injured. He would also let me care for him, although we both knew that his half-demon healing would kick in anyway; it was the act of nursing that we both enjoyed.
To this day he has never told me his feelings for me. I'm not sad about this; I realize that he has an obligation to his past lover, Kikyo. I just hope that he will be able to console her without having to give up his life as well. I hope that after I am gone, he will take the chance to live his life as he wishes, to the fullest that he possibly can. I smile a little, one of apology mixed with sadness and confusion as a tear fights it's way down my face. I can feel the burning of my legs as they are being consumed by the poisonous energy, however far away it seems, and I know that I must act now or I will have thrown away my life in vain.
And now my plan comes into action. Many years ago the Priestess Midoriko had an epic battle with a half demon in which many demons united in one human's weak heart, much like the demon Naraku I now fight. The weak heart of his human counterpart, the bandit Onigumo united the demons inside of him and became the Half-demon Naraku. When Midoriko faced this situation she battled with her demon for seven days and seven nights, before it began to consume her. Using the last of her powers, she sealed the demon's soul with her own into her heart and expelled it from her body creating the Shikon no Tama, the Jewel of Four Souls. And this, this is what I plan to do now, with my own powers.
I utter one last goodbye, probably heard only by his half-demon ears. I inhale sharply and wrap my life-energy around the demon energy of the beast Naraku, centering both around my heart. In the final moments I hear screams of comprehension, I hear them, my comrades pleading with me to stop, but I do not listen. In one last burst of energy, I enclose both Naraku's soul and mine into my heart, to eternally battle. I expel it in the tradition of the Priestess Midoriko before me. I only hope the continuing saga of the old jewel, and the new do not end as tragically as this one did. I hope my comrades will use them right away, destroying their presence forever. But now, my mind's job is done, and my conscience shall rest in peace.
The time has come. These are my final waking minutes. It saddens me that they should be spent in fear and pain instead of joy and contentment. Yet I knew this was coming, and I've said my goodbyes, though perhaps some were hidden in the disguise of false hope. After sleepless nights, and much thought about my options, I have come to the realization that this is the best plan of action. My friends, who have been there with me, helped me so much, to grow and to change from an immature girl into a cultured woman. they mean more to me than life itself. And so, I plan to give my life for theirs. But onto the farewells, for if I begin to reminisce about my past I will miss my Golden Chance.
First was to my Mother. she knew what I planned to do before a word escaped my lips. She held me close that night, as I told her everything, confessed my innermost dreams, desires, and even fantasies that I would never have the chance to live out. I remember my mouth becoming dry as my words flowed. I told her things I wasn't clearly aware of until they burst out; my envy of Kikyo, my petty jealousy of Sango, and even the way I felt about Inu-Yasha. I remember crying into her shoulder as particularly painful or tender subjects were discussed. She just held me the entire time, and listened with only a few words in between. I was always afraid that if she started talking, I wouldn't have the willpower to keep going. Morning came after many exhausting hours, and she tucked me into bed and let me sleep. She was truly my best friend, always there to offer advice, ease the burden of traveling between two worlds, or to give comfort when it was needed. I am truly blessed to have such a caring mom.
For Souta and my grandfather, I only told them how much I loved them, and how I would miss them. I didn't tell them that this time would be different. I couldn't be there when my brother found out; it would be far too painful. I couldn't have asked for a better little brother. He would go out of his way to pick up my homework at my high school when I was gone. He would ask for my help when he started liking girls, and he would always try to get me to play his video games with him, even though he knew I didn't understand them. Grandfather, senile though he might have seemed, was a truly respectable man. He charmed me as a child with his old Shrine stories and myths, some of which I now find are true. He always had a great imagination, and of his willpower I am still in awe. I will miss both my grandfather and brother greatly. Perhaps mom is telling them right now, what I really plan to do. Of course, I guess it isn't a plan now. This is reality.
I cannot forget Kaede, the woman who had acted as a counselor, friend, a helping hand and had offered me a place to call my home away from home these past few years. I'll never forget that she was always there to mother me. My favorite thing about returning to the village was being able to eat her fabulous stew. I'll always remember the particular flavor her "secret ingredient" added. It's hard now to think of her as the same hard working woman she used to be, for old age has begun to take it's toll more severely now. I don't think she is completely aware of her surroundings anymore. I hope that she lives well until the end of her days, and that she gets taken care of properly, although I'm sure Sango and Miroku will look after that.
I feel privileged to have had the opportunity to have traveled with such awesome and honorable people as are the duo team of Sango and Miroku. Miroku can be a trickster sometimes, but his general aura of benevolence makes him easy to forgive. I will miss his wry humor, and his ability to withstand pain. He always seemed to be so upbeat, although he knew that death was near, waiting to consume him by the hole on his right hand. I have noticed that he has become quiet as of late. I think he is worried about finding a woman to bear his heir. He'll be so happy when this final battle is over.
Sango. I can't even begin to explain what she means to me. I don't believe a stronger woman exists in all of Japan, yet even so she is as gentle as a lamb. She seems to be so mature, perhaps from the circumstances that led her to join us, or maybe it is an integral part of her personality, but it has saved both of us time and time again from the breakdown lurking in the shadows. Despite that, or perhaps because of it, she has been able to form a strong relationship with Miroku. She was so apprehensive about him, because of his wandering eyes and wandering hands. Now they are very close, and I know that he will be a good person for her to turn to once I've left them. I wish them luck, and I wish I could be there to see how their relationship progresses. They'll have a lot of work once I'm gone. To them I owe a life of happiness.
I must admit I have not seen two people I would have liked to before I go. Kouga and his tribe have been great help over the years, and Kouga has a special place in my heart, though perhaps it isn't the one for which he yearns. I have always admired his bold exterior, as well as his outspoken demeanor. I've always thought that it must be hard being the young leader of a demon wolf pack, although he seems to be very good at it. The second person is Inu-Yasha's half brother Sesshoumaru. Perhaps I am imagining things, or maybe I'm the only one that's noticed, but I have never believed that Sesshoumaru was a real threat. I think he was trying to help his little brother in his own way - the only way he knew. I have yet to thank him for his kindness, though I have no doubt that he would be less than willing to hear it.
I am glad that one person who has managed to worm his way into my heart is not here to see me. Shippou is a mature child, sometimes so much so that we forget that he is a child. It was the general consensus of our little group that he should sit this battle out. I'm glad he did; otherwise the grief would have been too much for everyone to bear. I hope that one day he will go seek out more Fox demons like himself; to learn about his true heritage.
I look now, in my last moments, to see Inu-Yasha staring back with his confusion clearly written upon his face. All he sees is a dear friend being consumed by his hated foe, and making no move to stop her imminent death. I have said nothing of a final goodbye to him, for if I did, I would not have the courage to end this now. I take one last look at the face of the man I loved, the face that has haunted my thoughts and dreams without mercy.
I still remember exactly what I thought of him the first time I saw him. He held such a peaceful expression on his face. His cute dog ears and white hair threw me off at first, making me wonder exactly what he was, but I was sure that he wouldn't hurt me. Well, I would have been sure of that if I had been sure he was alive.
After he had been released from his fifty-year slumber, he changed into someone totally different. He was brash, crude, and egotistical, yet I knew he was looking out for me. As I took my last, long looks at him during this last week, I realized exactly how much he has changed from that boy he once was. He is now more trusting of people as a whole, and far gentler and more civilized.
I can't remember when I started to fall for him. It must have been a few months after we had met, although I felt strongly for him as a friend before that. When we had quiet moments, at night or when our small group was separated, he would talk to me in earnest. He was always frank with his opinions; a blessing as well as a curse. I learned so much about life from him and that led me to admire and care for him all the more. I loved the way he would carry me, when we were chasing a demon, or when I was injured. He would also let me care for him, although we both knew that his half-demon healing would kick in anyway; it was the act of nursing that we both enjoyed.
To this day he has never told me his feelings for me. I'm not sad about this; I realize that he has an obligation to his past lover, Kikyo. I just hope that he will be able to console her without having to give up his life as well. I hope that after I am gone, he will take the chance to live his life as he wishes, to the fullest that he possibly can. I smile a little, one of apology mixed with sadness and confusion as a tear fights it's way down my face. I can feel the burning of my legs as they are being consumed by the poisonous energy, however far away it seems, and I know that I must act now or I will have thrown away my life in vain.
And now my plan comes into action. Many years ago the Priestess Midoriko had an epic battle with a half demon in which many demons united in one human's weak heart, much like the demon Naraku I now fight. The weak heart of his human counterpart, the bandit Onigumo united the demons inside of him and became the Half-demon Naraku. When Midoriko faced this situation she battled with her demon for seven days and seven nights, before it began to consume her. Using the last of her powers, she sealed the demon's soul with her own into her heart and expelled it from her body creating the Shikon no Tama, the Jewel of Four Souls. And this, this is what I plan to do now, with my own powers.
I utter one last goodbye, probably heard only by his half-demon ears. I inhale sharply and wrap my life-energy around the demon energy of the beast Naraku, centering both around my heart. In the final moments I hear screams of comprehension, I hear them, my comrades pleading with me to stop, but I do not listen. In one last burst of energy, I enclose both Naraku's soul and mine into my heart, to eternally battle. I expel it in the tradition of the Priestess Midoriko before me. I only hope the continuing saga of the old jewel, and the new do not end as tragically as this one did. I hope my comrades will use them right away, destroying their presence forever. But now, my mind's job is done, and my conscience shall rest in peace.