Title : Tiny
Disclaimer : I don't own Saiunkoku Monogatari. It belongs to Sai Yukino.
Rating : T
Genre : Humour/Friendship
Warnings : None
Pairing : Koyu/Shuei
Summary : Shuei is devastated to learn that Koyu considers his "definitely tiny".
Notes : Time-fit - between chapter 2 and chapter 3 of my fanfic Twin Irises, and after Silk Pants. Status – attracted to each other, but nothing is out in the open.
"Tiny? I always thought I was . . . average."
Koyu snorted derisively.
"Tiny. Definitely tiny."
Shuei drew his thighs together self-consciously. He felt the heat on his face and neck.
He had never been deluded about his size. And really, it had never troubled him. Unlike a lot of men, Shuei's ego was not tied in with how well he filled his pants. He prided himself on his skill as a lover, not on the size of his equipment.
So it came as a shock, the realization that he was this embarrassed by Koyu's remark on his endowment. But then, perhaps not. This man, this one that snorted derisively, was the one and only man whose approval Shuei desired on this matter.
Mortified by the absurdness of what he was about to do, Shuei embarked on a defence of his inches.
"Koyu, you can't use yourself as a yardstick. Next to you, an average would appear tiny."
"It's got nothing to do with that. I'm talking about proportions."
"Proportions?"
Shuei's voice was close to a squawk.
"Yes, proportions. For a man your height, that would be considered tiny."
This was getting increasingly humiliating! Shuei tried a different approach.
"I've never had any complaints, Koyu, not about the size, and certainly not about the satisfaction."
Koyu turned to stare at Shuei.
"Satisfaction? Satisfaction with what?"
"SEX! What else?"
Koyu blinked. And blinked again. Then he blushed.
"You use that for sex? Really? I thought only spiders do that!"
It was Shuei's turn to stare.
SPIDERS? ! ! !
Am I going insane, or is he?
They stared at each other in mutual incomprehension.
Incomprehensibly, and inconveniently, Shuei felt "tiny" growing.
Good grief! Not now!
Koyu saw the turmoil in the violet eyes.
Why is he so upset about my observation that he has tiny feet?
Koyu wasn't comfortable talking about Shuei's sex life. It was too close to home. Koyu wanted to be Shuei's lover, not talk about his lovers! But there was no help for it.
"Shuei, my opinion is not important. Your lovers are happy with whatever it is that your feet do for them. That's what really matters, isn't it?"
"FEET? You were talking about my feet? But you said 'when I held it in my hand, through the silk, I was surprised at how tiny it was", and I have TWO feet!"
Earlier on, they had been talking about their first meeting in the Archives, when Koyu, at different points, had held two different parts of Shuei's anatomy in his hand. One was Shuei's package, the other was Shuei's right foot.
"I was holding your right FOOT! That's an 'it'!
They glared. Then they burst out laughing.
"So, Koyu, about . . ."
Koyu held his hands up in mock defence.
"Average! Definitely average!"
Shuei laughed.
"I meant, about spiders!"
"The male spider picks up its ejaculated sperm at the end of its pedipalp, commonly mistaken for its leg, and . . ."
Shuei choked.
[The End]
Notes : (1) Written in response to the 500 word LJ Saiunkoku Monogatari Challenge prompt "Tiny Feet".
(2) Koyu and Shuei's first meeting at the Archives is described in chapter 1 of my fanfic Twin Irises.
(3) Spiders reproduce sexually, however, the male's sperm is not inserted into the female's body from within the male's genitals. Rather an intermediate stage takes place. The male spider ejaculates onto a ready-made small sperm web and picks it up on the end of his pedipalp. When the female is in position, the male deposits the sperm in the female's genital opening.