Disclaimer; I own nothing but the plot.
It had been so long, so long since he'd seen a pink and yellow girl who forever haunted his dreams. The universe didn't matter, the world didn't matter. Saving them both, it didn't matter. Because now he was allowing himself to mourn her, to cry at the fact that he never told her that he loved her because he was such a coward.
He lived in his thoughts, recused to his TARDIS. He wasn't really sure how to go on, he though he'd be okay. Going having a time with Donna and saving the world from a big red spider, but he wasn't. He was far, far from okay. He was floating, somewhere out in space, just floating. Wondering if the Daleks were right, did emotions really ruin you? Because he felt awfully ruined.
Ruined. His hearts, ruined. His life, ruined. And if he went to find her, to try to fix himself, the universe would be ruined. It seemed everything revolved around being ruined and that wasn't, couldn't be. Shouldn't be right. Perhaps it was because of this that humans refused reality, maybe they knew, understood. They were a brilliant species. He let go of that thought, because humans made him think of Rose and thinking of Rose was just too painful.
He missed the hum of the TARDIS, the excited grins of the second woman he'd ever really loved.
Loneliness was creeping up on him again, under the stars. With nobody to talk to, to talk back to. He felt as though he was dying, but this wasn't what dying felt like for Time Lords. He wondered if this was how humans felt after particularly bad break ups. Hurt frittered around him, it took him a minute to realize that the TARDIS wanted to go somewhere, or just get some attention.
The familiar hum of the engine was what caused him to jump up for his lying place on the ground, his dark brown eyes fluttered around the TARDIS but he didn't try to stop her from going anywhere, because she was probably bored and it always had a purpose. Almost always, anyway. He landed somewhere out in a green field, and as soon as he stepped out of it, the TARDIS doors closed and sealed themselves shut.
He glared that the blue box, before turning and walking down a well-worn looking path. The stars were bright and the moon was full. Memories were flitting through his head at the moment, of Rose looking around a beautiful planet, where moons shone brightly. Her thin frame dancing through the mist with her excited giggles dancing around all over the place.
He really need to stop, because his hearts felt as though they were going to pop out of his chest. He didn't understand what was up with him, he'd never really felt this way about anyone. The only time he'd felt this horrible was when Gallifrey ended and all of his species died.
He also really need to stop thinking.
The path he was walking to evidently led into the city, and it seemed that this was that New York city that Rose had always wanted to go to. His chest ached. He was beginning to hate his thoughts, his mind. In fact, he wouldn't even feel this way if he just didn't take companions.
But he was only a Time Lord, he was bound to get lonely, too. Then he realized that he'd used the same saying that humans said. He sighed, he needed to be next to a certain blonde. He laughed to himself, he was never like this before, he could leave people so easily, he didn't even do it nicely. He could let go of people easier than anyone he had ever known. Which he supposed was a bit sad, but it was the truth.
But she changed him, and he just let her go. How could he do something like that? He was perfectly willing to, too, especially the first time when he zapped her away himself.
He just wanted to hear her laugh again, to feel her skin. To see her excited grin and her almost dancing with happiness, he didn't even hardly remember her laugh, just her tears as they said goodbye. Without even noticing her, he bumped right into a black hair woman.
"Oi, watch where you're going, will you?" Her voice sounded a bit shrill. "Sorry.." He muttered stepping around her with ease. She looked troubled as she watched him walk away, but, to his surprise, because human normally acted on impulse, she turned and continued on her way.
The city was alive, more so looking like London in his mind. He recalled Rose's face when he'd met her in London that time, his chest ached more so than it had been before. His thin frame slid past a gate easily, and he stopped for a minute to look around.
Why did the TARDIS bring him to New York City? It made no sense, what's so ever. He squinted at the brick wall that was in front of him, he heard the hurried click click click of heals on the pavement. "What, are you followin' me?" The black-haired woman glared at him, "Don't flatter yourself, lady. I don't follow people." She stared.
Holding out her hand, she muttered her name. "I'm Lily, and I'm seventeen years old." He looked at her for a moment, she seemed perfectly innocent. "Hello Lily, I'm the doctor.."
"That's not a name." She jibed, once again glaring with dark, dark eyes. He stared at for a bit longer, drinking her in. "Oh.." He muttered, exasperated. "What?" He shook his head and, again, muttered his answer. He seemed to be doing that a lot, muttering.
She took him in, then turned and walked away. "Hey! Hey, where are you going?" "Home," "Ah.." He slowed his pace. "Unless you want me to stay, you seem a bit lonely..." She stopped, turning to look at him. He shrugged and nodded, "I am, do."
She slid down the brick wall into a sitting position, he followed the suit. They sat there, not talking, just enjoying each other's company. He felt a little less lonely, his chest ached a little less and his mind was clear enough for him to realize that he did indeed enjoy her company.
She traced the ground with a painted black fingernail and her plump, pink lips curved up into a smile. It hit him that he was staring at her lips and looked above him, at the lovely stars that a lovely hour ago he had floated through. Until the TARDIS had to go and do this.
"I always loved the stars, when I was little, I used to dream that a madman in a blue police box would take me to travel them, irrational, I know. But I was just a child, I don't know what my excuse is now, though. I'm seventeen." He stared at her for a long time.
"We- Our heads, they like to work out a life that would be better for us. They like to take real things, and turn them into fictional things that would make us happy." He bared her pearly white teeth to him in a grin, "'Spose' you're right, Doctor."
He didn't like the way she said Doctor. He didn't like the way her hand felt on his thigh and he was sure that he was bright red in the face. He quickly removed her hand and put them safely into her lap. She snorted with laughter. He dd not find this situation funny, which he made obvious my frowning at her.
A few moments later, they lay sprawled out on the dirty pavement, they hadn't done anything and the Doctor was trying to remember how they had gotten there. "So, Lily, tell me, who left you?" She turned her head away from the stars to look at him. "My parents." Her American accent was heavy. "Not even in a foster home, just in the house. They packed up one day, told me they were going to the store. I was two when it happened, so I didn't question them.
"They disappeared, stopped paying household bills. Left me to fend for myself, 'spose' that I, should be happy that some random bank dude found me, but I can't say I really am." He nodded, "You sound very mature for a seventeen year old girl."
She laughed, "I just want a madman in a blue box to save me, I'm a mere child, not mature at all."
He stood up, then held out his hand, "Come on." she followed. He took her to the field that held the TARDIS, she stared at the wooden, blue police box in awe. "W-what?" He kept her hand and took her inside, then turned and smiled. "I'm a madman, I have a blue box, and I would like to take you to see the stars."
She wrapped her arms around him, shouted out a simple "Yes!" and started exploring the TARDIS.
He felt very happy, and thought, maybe he would be alright.
Yes, as he stared at a seventeen year old named Lily, he knew he'd be alight.
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Hi! So, this is a bit different then my usual setting. Doctor Who and not even a rated T! I really hope you guys enjoyed it, if not shoot me a review telling me how I can improve! - Luna