Wheel In The Sky
By Bigdamngrizzlybear
(a/n: I came up with this as a result of an intense Firefly addiction as well as having read The Dark Tower for literally my entire life. I was born just before The Gunslinger was published, and at the speed the first three books were written, it took until I was almost thirty for the tale to be told. It was the idea of the doors on the beach being able to go anywhere or anyWHEN that got this one going in my head. Also, last I checked, there was exactly ONE crossover between these two great stories. You should read the Dark Tower series, by Stephen King, first. You probably won't make any kind of sense out of Roland's world or story otherwise. There is a TON of detail in over 4500 pages of the Dark Tower series, so if I make any mistakes they are unintentional. It is also my first time writing, fanfic or otherwise, so be gentle.)
Disclaimer: Don't own any of 'em, wish I did. I'm not making any money, it's okay to leave the lawyers in their coffins 'till the sun comes up.
Chapter 1: He Just HAD To Say It.
"GORRAMMIT!" Jayne thought as he saw the purple-bellies coming down the street towards them, two full squads already spread out in loose wedge formations, making it impossible to use EITHER direction for an escape. Normally that wouldn't be no kinda issue, 'cept that this particular job was takin' place on a crowded street, where some thoughtless hundan had put the local Alliance payroll. Made it all kinda difficult for any honest thieving' to be done if you had a couple dozen of the local outpost about to be up your pi gu screwin' up your getaway plans. Jayne smirked to himself at that one. Like he hadn't been waiting for something like this to happen, even more as the job got closer to being done. Mal didn't never have a plan that went smooth, an' they all knew it. Don't try to tell HIM that though, man was like to swell up and get all captain-y, say things like, "Jayne, I don't pay you for your deep insight, when I'M the Captain of this boat"
"But Mal, all's I"m sayin is-"
"Jayne, remember that thing I told you about your mouth running?"
"yeah, Mal but.."
"No "buts" Jayne. This here is supposed to be a real easy take. Badger says that the payroll is stored there in the basement vault, prior to being collected for the outpost paymaster office. We hit just before noon, day before pickup, when the noontime traffic gives us some cover, slip out of the crowd, ten minutes later slip back into the crowd, melt away. Easy-Peasy."
Jayne had winced when Mal said that, knowin' full well that he had laid the Malcolm Reynolds Curse on the job, just like tellin' a pitcher he had a no-hitter going back on Earth-That-Was. Didn't that man have the sense God gave a goose? Even the pansy-ass Doc knew better than to say anything like that, an' he hadn't even been on Serenity two years yet!
"Aww, Hell.", Jayne grumped to himself, as he looked down on the crowded streets through binoculars. He eyed the bar across the street and briefly thought about how good a beer would taste right now, but then dismissed the idea. At least the man had had the sense to let him get to high ground, or in this case, A rooftop. What with this being an Alliance pay office on an Alliance moon, Jayne had thought it best to get high and give everyone some cover. This here was really a job for two riflemen, or ideally FOUR men, one man spotting for each shooter, and facing different directions, since Mal, in his infinite Captainy Wisdom, had decided to pull a job on a street that was open on both ends, meanin' that Jayne had to basically just look through binoculars the whole time,back and forth, trying to cover two directions. A rifle barrel moving around that much would be seen too easily, so he had to leave his best girl laying beside him. Jayne grinned at that thought, remembering the fight at the Heart of Gold, hadn't hardly had time to get his drawers on proper when the trouble had come over the hill. "Now THAT was my idea of fightin", Jayne thought, as he lay under the tarp on the rooftop, grinnin' from ear to ear, "Fighting, ruttin' and a pretty girl handing me loaded girls just as fast as I could shoot em' dry." Jayne laughed, at the accidental double-intendre in his thoughts when the earpiece of his comms crackled out, "Man-Called-Jayne, the Girl does NOT appreciate your musings and mental wandering about past conquests when you are supposed to be watching her back. Also the memories are icky." Jayne's mod went immediately from amused to angry, "Gorrammit, girl, I've told you before about peeking! You're gonna get me in trouble with-"
"Have no fear, Man-called-Jayne, Captain Daddy knows that the Man-Called-Jayne ocasionally needs his woman to keep him in line." Jayne could almost see the little self satisfied smile that she wore when she had figured something that was right smart out before anyone else even knew there was a problem, or when they had had a right good tussle in the cargo bay, or right after they had just-
"FOCUS,JAYNE!"
"Sorry, Darlin', but that pretty little mouth of yours would make any man what wasn't sly lose his focus. And I'll have you know there ain't a thing in the Verse' that scares me! Just don't want to have tangle with Zoe too, you know she'd back Mal right or wrong.", Jayne said, feeling a little ashamed for letting his focus slide at a time like this, He was supposed to be a professional, not some kid at his first rodeo!
"All is well, Man-Called-Jayne, the Girl never doubted your fearlessness nor your abilities to protect the family. Just be vigilant, make sure all stays well, so that when we return to the ship, all can be VERY well." that last delivered in a husky whisper that had begun to haunt Jayne's dreams, whether or not he was awake.
"Tross, it's hard enough to do an honest job of thievin' without my two gunfighters puttin' creepifyin' images in my head." they both heard Mal say.
"The Girl apologizes, Captain-Daddy. She will strive to remain more professional."
"NOW who's losin' the focus, eh, girlie?" Jayne grinned as he glassed the street, the grin falling off his face like it had never been there, " Aie ya tien ah, River,..." Jayne started to say, seeing figures wearing the distinctive armor of alliance infantry rounding the corner, and coming down the street in loose formation.
"I have already alerted the captain to the Alliance presence outside the bank, Jayne.", River said, all playfulness gone from her voice, not her crazy killer woman gear, but controlled and precise.
"Jayne? You got eyes on the imminent violence headed our way?", Jayne heard Mal ask, tension tight in his voice.
"I got ten purple-bellies on the west end of the street, Mal, little heavy, but might just be a standard patrol..." Jayne's words cut off as he swiveled the other direction and swore, "Gao yang jong du goo yang, nope Mal, we ain't that lucky, I got another ten on the east end of the street, looks like they aim to either catch us in a pincer move or try to stack up and storm the bank...nope, they're stoppin' about twenty yards out, trying to look all casual." Jayne said, eyeing the rest of the street. "looks like the civilians ain't buyin' the act either, the whole damn street's emptying out, least we won't have to worry about using any of my "little buddies", Jayne said, thinking of the bandoleer of grenades he took on EVERY job now, no matter what the captian said.
"Jayne, you mean to say you brought grenades, even after I told you to leave em' back at the boat? I thought we already had this discussion about who was and wasn't captain here..."
"Reavers, Captian-Daddy," Jayne heard River interject.
"Tross' I'm well aware of what happened last time we hit a bank.." Mal started to object,
"Operative, Sir," Jayne heard Zoe chime in, as he pulled Vera close and clipped her sling into place on his armor.
"Zoe? You too? I thought we had this whole 'agree with the Captians orders thing' going on on this boat"... Mal kept on, trying to retain some shreds of dignity in the argument he was rapidly losing.
"Hey Mal? Can we please continue this conversation about "The rules of Captainy Respect" back at the boat, after we survive the Malcolm Reynolds Curse? Again?" Jayne asked, feeling the adrenaline of combat starting to flow into his system.
"FINE.", Jayne heard Mal harrumph, though he swore he could have heard him mutter things about who was the Captian, no respect, airlocks, pay cuts, and other things as he readied three grenades in a row beside him.
"Jayne? I will handle the west end if you will deal with the east." Jayne heard River say, as he made certain that Vera's safety was off, and pulled the tarp off of himself, getting ready to throw the first two grenades.
"Fine, girlie. I'll throw three and then take the rest from the ground." Jayne said, now ready and waiting.
"Just how are you intendin' on getting' down from your perch there, Jayne?" Mal asked.
"Gotta rope and harness up here, Mal. Me an River worked it out ahead of time. When you hear three go off, River goes first an' then you an' Zoe haul ass. Get out fast and get on the mule. Me an' River will deal with these Hwoon Dans. Is the pay loaded?"
"All but the last trip. Me and Zoe'll carry that out whilst Tross and yourself earn your cut"
"Any chance of eleven percent?" Jayne asked, not being able to resist needling the Cap just a little.
"Don't push it none, Jayne" Mal said, still sounding a mite put out over the Curse proving out AGAIN.
"Alrighty then," Jayne said, eager to stop talking and start shooting. "Hey, River?" He said, picking up two grenades, hooking both pins over Vera's cocking handle, and yanking them loose.
"Yes, Jayne?" And he swore he could HEAR her predatory little smile.
"Cry Havoc...", Jayne said, grinning.
"And let slip the dogs of war.", She finished.
Jayne started throwing.