Disclaimer: South Park is the intellectual property of Trey Parker and Matt Stone, and copywrite by Comedy Central. This story is meant for entertainment only and no money is being made from its internet publication. Enjoy.

Author's Note: This is my first South Park story, so I hope you guys enjoy it. I needed a pairing for this idea and Stan and Kyle were just perfect for it. So without further ado, please enjoy…

If it Means Choosing Hell

As soon as Stan logged onto his Skype account a message popped up on his screen telling him that Butters was calling him. Stan clicked the button that allowed the video call chat feature to load and Butters' face popped up on the screen.

"Hey Stan," Butters greeted, though the blond looked worried.

"What's up Butters?" Stan asked, not really in the mood to talk to him at the moment.

"Uh, you probably want to talk to Kyle, Stan. He's been kinda out of it all day. I don't know what's wrong because he won't talk to me. " Butters replied. It was times like this that he regretted not going on to the University with Kyle and Butters and most of his friends from South Park. Stan had gone to community college for two years and then decided to get into the work force. Everybody was at University but him, Cartman, and Kenny. Cartman had done well enough to get into community college too, and he was still stuck in there, trying to figure out what to do with his life and having to retake half of his classes. Kenny's family was too poor for him to attend college of any kind and because he kept hopping from Heaven to Hell to Earth there was no chance that he could have gotten a scholarship, unless perhaps to a religious studies program. "I thought maybe you could talk to him since you guys are…you know…"

"Together?" Stan suggested in a bored voice. He was really tired of their friends skirting around the fact that he and Kyle were dating.

"Yeah, that" Butters said rubbing the back of his neck in a way that showed he was slightly uncomfortable.

Stan looked over on his contacts and saw that Kyle had his status set to 'Busy.' "Yeah, I'll try to talk to him Butters, thanks," Stan said. He clicked the button to end his call to Butters and called Kyle instead. To his surprise, Kyle actually answered him. The redhead was crying.

"Hey Kyle" Stan said, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing" Kyle said rubbing his eyes. "It's just I've been thinking about you so much."

"I miss you too baby." Stan responded, holding his hand up to the screen of his computer so that he could in a way touch Kyle even though they were so far apart.

"No, that's not it really." Kyle said. "It's just, I'm so glad that you chose me."

"What do you mean? Of course I chose you." Stan insisted "I love you."

"But that's the thing. You really love me. I know you do because you're bisexual or pansexual or omnisexual or whatever you are." Kyle told him.

"What are you talking about?" Stan asked confused.

"You love people for who they are and you don't care what they look like. I wish I could say the same but I only like men and only certain types of men too, like they have to be taller than me and everything." Kyle explained.

"What's your point?" Stan asked.

"Well, I don't think I would love you if you weren't a guy and all." Kyle said.

"But I am a guy, so what's wrong?" Stan asked.

"You're in love with my soul, but I don't know if I'm in love with yours," said Kyle.

"Well why do you love me?" Stan prodded.

"You're my best friend Stan," Kyle told him. The redhead paused and then blushed as he continued. "I love you because you're so sweet to me and because you're nerdy and funny and sexy." He looked away as his blush deepened. "Most of all I love you because you love me back."

"See, you do love me for my soul." Stan told him. "We're soul mates Kyle. God must have put my soul in this body so that you would love me and we could be together."

"But why didn't he make me a girl then?" Kyle asked. "We could be together then and people wouldn't freak out so much. You know what my mom did when she found out I was gay." Kyle had been fifteen when he had been caught kissing another boy by the school counselor. The counselor had called his mother and she had sent him directly to some straight camp she had heard about from Mr. Stotch. It hadn't worked.

Stan gave Kyle a dirty look. "You know I haven't been able to be in a relationship with a girl since Wendy…you know..." Stan and Wendy had been on-again-off-again for ten years and she had been a bitch to him the entire time, but what she had done the last time had hurt him so bad that he had given up not just her, but women in general. Kyle knew better than to bring the subject of her treachery up again.

"Stan?" Kyle's voice was questioning. There was silence before he continued. "How can we be soul mates if we don't even have the same religion? When we die, and I mean like regular people dying, not Kenny dying, we won't go to the same place. I mean, one of us has to be wrong."

"Kyle, you've met Jesus, how can you still not believe in him?"

"Dammit Stan, I believe in Jesus, I just don't think he's the Messiah." Kyle paused and looked away. "But, I mean, what if I'm wrong? Or what if you're wrong? We're going to be separated when we die."

"I won't go to Heaven without you Kyle. First of all, you're a much better person than I am. You may not think Jesus is your Messiah or whatever but you follow his teachings a lot better than I do. But if you don't get into Heaven and I do, then I won't go. I'd rather be separated from God for all eternity than be separated from you. I love you Kyle, and I'm sorry it took so long for me to realize it, but I'm never going to let you go."

"You're right, there's no way either one of us are going to Heaven."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm pretty sure it's in the Ten Commandments that you can't love anything more than God."

"Well then as soon as you get home let's pick out an apartment in Hell. Kenny says it's not so bad down there. And from his description Heaven has too many boobs anyway."