Say Anything, Even When it Hurts
Disclaimer: Naruto is Copyright © Masashi Kishimoto. I claim no ownership.
A/N: I don't know about this one. This is my first Naruto story. :3 But, I honestly don't know the series too well, so excuse any mistakes with that. Also, excuse my grammer… This has not been beta-read. Anyway, I have been struck with terrible writer's block while writing this… but the idea just wouldn't leave me alone… so, I wrote it anyway! Enjoy… and it's inspired by sharingank's "Carnival".
He used to gaze deep into her green irises, because he was searching for something. For a long time, he'd try to see through the jade-colored eyes lined at the pupil with gold. Entwined in there he thought he'd find some kind of significance to his existence. To have that would be a fraction of the jubilation he had festal dreams of.
However, he could never find it, for her cheeks turned into a pale shade of rose. And when she blushed, she'd feel like a Christmas tree—her facial features all lit up in red and green. Embarrassed, so she'd turn away.
Away from his gaze.
Away from the world she didn't want to divulge into.
Away from him.
She'd then say, "Kankuro."
And it was just a little too firm, so he was a little too wounded by it. And, he thought that she'd send him away, away, away. For a brother mustn't do such to his sister.
He shouldn't make her skin shiver down the bone that made up her spine.
Now, though, Kankuro knew better. He had erroneously mistaken the attention she gave him for some puerile penchant that was never really there. She was merely fulfilling her role as the "loving older sister", giving each of her fragile, younger brothers the time of day.
And, love was just a four letter word for the expected affection between siblings. He didn't know any better.
Sometimes, though, Kankuro wandered if Gaara had ever seen a different part of Temari that he was graced with a few times. It was on some empty, clear deep blue sky night when she'd hold him a little closer than usual. He'd hear her heart thud lightly, and she'd feel his little chest rise and fall. Then, his head would find her shoulder, and it'd stay there, because it felt so right.
Temari would then babble on in a hushed whisper some story that Kankuro honestly didn't care to hear, but he didn't want her to leave in frustration. He wanted her there, just to hear her voice and feel her beside him.
Temari.
His sister.
His blood.
His desires.
His dreams.
But, she would never know such foolish wants.
Nights in Sunagakure were never like the majestic ones of Konohagakure. Only the stars and the moon illuminated the clay structures of the village. And unlike the smoldering days that the inhabitants of the village suffered through, nights were calm and breezy. Sometimes, like tonight, they were even a bit chilly.
Tonight wasn't any ordinary night. They were celebrating in honor of the new Kazekage. The sky was on fire, colorful explosions busting into the moonlit sky of navy blue. Red, blue, white, fuchsia, purple, green eruptions of light and noise expanded from the rocket shell and unfolded before their eyes in long streams of colors like the leaves of a palm tree.
Shthunk! And a pyrotechnic rocket was lifted into the air. There was a small explosion of white light, silence for a second, and then shimmering stars hissed off the tips of the branches of light. It was mesmerizing.
As the fireworks show took a turn to a slower pace, Temari's interest was drawn away from the sky and to her younger brother beside her. They sat on the rooftop of the highest structure in the entire village where the view was spectacular, but more importantly, they were alone. She watched him gape at the sight in the sky, red light from the fireworks illuminating off of his scraped skin.
Her eyelids lowered, partly covering her green eyes, and then she said one thing, but it was already too much. "You look so much like father did, Kankuro." It was almost a whisper.
It had only been true—Kankuro had short, pointed brown hair and narrow eyes just as their father had before possessed. But such words should have never been spoken. His eyes widened in surprise, and his lips parted but only trembled before whispers could be uttered.
She watched his head bow down in shame and shoulders collapse, destroying his previously confident and comfortable form.
And suddenly, she wasn't the fearless, unsympathetic Temari that she was in battle. She felt so tiny, and she was losing her wings. All she needed to do was utter two simple words, "I'm sorry." She didn't even have to mean it. To just hear that would be enough for Kankuro.
But, when she looked into those small, hurting eyes, she realized that her slip-up would take more than an oral apology. He brought his knees up to his chest and pinned them there with his arms wrapped around his legs.
The moment when Temari was supposed to apologize was gone and there was only silence. He stared up at the sky.
The silence didn't last long, for Temari was still the girl he thought of the most, and he was still the brother who she felt closest to. So, he let her in again.
She wrapped him up in her warmth, her arms enclosed in black robes that wrapped around his waist.
She said, "Kankuro is Kankuro, my brother, and no one else."
He was looking up at her with sad, questioning eyes, and she was pulling his seemingly weightless head to her breast.
Temari paused before she said anymore. "And… I can tell him… anything…"
And there beside her, he remembered the dreams he had sometimes at night. Dreams where the nights were cool, and his bed was too cold. He'd slink out of his own room and find himself in his sister's. And every time, she'd welcome him with open arms. There beside her he was naked, but warm, and so very needed and loved.
Only libido, he decided.
If Temari could tell him anything, then he knew that she had only expected him to do the same.
But, such lonely dreams… She'd never know of such.
Fin.