Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Naruto or Fruits Basket characters, all characters are copyrighted to their original owners. Same thing with Naruto Shippuden ending 2.
A/N: My first real fanfic, it's based on a real life experience my friends and I had. It's a Naruto/Fruits Basket crossover. Um...yeah. I'm gonna go on forever so enjoy! Oh and tell me if you don't understand it or I made a mistake. (especially in Momiji's German)
The Ultimate April Fools Prank
It was a normal Saturday in the Yamanaka household, time dragged by and there was nothing to do. Until...
Ino ran into the living room, skidding on the hard wooden floor. "Mom!" Ino's mother looked up from doing the dishes. "What is it Ino?" she said. Ino jumped up and down, "Mom can I have some friends over? Please please please?", she begged. "Pleeeeeeeeeeease?" Her mother sighed. With her daughter she was never sure what would happen if she left her alone. But she would like to get Ino out of her hair...
"Sure Ino."
"Yes!" Ino punched a fist into the air.
"But," her mother began. Ino groaned.
"You have to do some of that math project. It's due the 30th. Let your friends help you." "Sure mom." Ino smiled.
Later when her friends came over Ino did some of her project. (Momiji spilled paint on Ino's jeans but whatever.) "Come on let's go into my room!" Ino said. Ino's house was quite large so all her friends fit in her room. "God Ino your room is huge!", TenTen yelled out.
"It's not that big." Sasuke said, emo as ever.
After a while, they got bored. "Oo I know!", said Naruto while sitting on the seat by the window. "Let's prank call someone!" There was various mutterings in the room concerning Naruto's idea.
"I got it!" TenTen smacked her fist into her palm. "Let's prank call 1-800 MATTRES!"
"That's a great idea TenTen!" Ino said.
"Heyyyyy...But it was my idea!" Naruto complained. Everyone ignored him.
"Okay so who has a cell phone?" Ino asked reaching for her own cell phone. Sasuke didn't take his out as he was still too busy getting used to Ino's fluffy pink decor.
"I've never prank called anyone before.", Haru said pulling out his cell phone. "You should. It's lots of fun.", Ino said. Ino punched in 1-800.
"Uh...how do you spell mattress?"
Shikamaru sighed. "Give me."
Ino handed him the phone. "M-A-T-T-R-E-S", Shikamaru said as he typed in the numbers.
"Leave out the last 'S' for savings!", sang out Momiji cheerily.
"Ssssh...It's ringing", Ino told everyone putting a finger to her lips.
After in intro for 1-800 MATTRES (advirtising twin sized mattresses) someone picked up the phone. "Yes this is Albert from 1-800 MATTRES, how may I help you?" "Yeah I'd like to order two king sized mattresses.", Shikamaru said to the man. "Yeah, I heard this before I'm calling the police.", Albert said and hung up. "What'd he say?", Sasuke asked. "He said he's calling the police and he hung up.", Shika answered.
"I've prank called before. They all say that. It's a bunch of bull shit.", Kyo said.
"Uh..um...C-can we call someone else?", Hinata asked timidly. "I have my cell phone." Hinata pulled out her blue cell phone with a Naruto keychain attached. "H-here." She leaned over Ino's bunk bed and handed it to Kyo. Kyo punched in random numbers and waited for someone to answer. After five rings somone picked up."
"Hello?"
"Say your name is Bob.", Momiji whispered.
"This is Bob...Bob the Builder." Kyo heard the girls giggle.
"Who?", the person asked.
"This is BOB.", Kyo repeated. He covered the speaker with his hand. "I think this person is deaf!", Kyo whispered.
"Who IS this?!", the person said in an odd squeaky voice.
"MY NAME IS BOBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBB!!", Kyo screamed into the phone.
"Your name is Bob?"
"YES!", Kyo said exasperated.
"Say we're selling real estate.", Momiji whispered to Kyo.
"Shut up Momiji.", Kyo said and shoved Momiji. "Uh...we're selling...real estate."
"Your selling whaaaaaaaaat??"
"Oh forget it!", Kyo yelled and hung up.
Momiji was laughing hysterically. So was everyone else. Even Sasuke managed to laugh. "Now let's call that 1-800 MATTRES place again.", said Haru. He dialed the numbers then tossed the phone to Hinata. Hinata heared the phone ringing. "W-what am I suppose to say?", said Hinata.
"I don't know! Sing something!", Kyo said.
Finlly someone picked up. "Yes this is Fred from 1-800 MATTRES, how may I help you?
"Y-you are my friend, aa ano he no yume ima de-", Hinata was cut off by Fred.
"Ah...so your one of those Easter babies!"
Hinata hung up.
"Wh-what's an Easter baby?", Hinata asked. "It's one of those strippers who calls people during Easter time.", Naruto said trying not to giggle. Hinata's face turned red at the statement.
"Hey Haru, gimme your phone.", Ino said. Haru tossed Ino his phone and Ino dialed the numbers.
"Hello this is 1-800 MATTRES how may I help you?", said a female voice. Ino covered the receiver with her hand. "Oh shit it's a girl! What should I say?"
"Tell her that she's troublesome.", said Shikamaru. Ino snapped the phone closed. "Shika! You can't say that to a woman! You have to be nice!" She smacked Shikamaru on the head. "Bad."
"Kyo-kun it's your turn!", Momiji shouted and flung his phone (with a rabbit glitter sticker on it) to Kyo. "Guy's you know this is really stupi-" "Just call!", Momiji yelled. "Alright, alright stupid rabbit.", he mumbled.
"Yeah! And yell at that asshole Albert for yelling at Shikamaru!", Ino shouted leaning on Shika's shoulder.
"Get off.", Shikamaru grumbled. "Shut up guys, It's ringing.", Kyo growled.
"Hello this is 1-800 MATTRES how may I help you?", Albert answered again.
"WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU I JUST WANTED TO BUY A MATTRESS!!"
"You can buy one when you stop being a loser.", Albert said and hung up.
Kyo held the phone in his hand, his mouth agape. "What happened?", Sasuke asked. "That bastard called me a loser and hung up!!" "Kyo close your mouth. A bug might fly in.", Haru advised. Momiji noticed Naruto mumbling to himself on Ino's bed. "Hey Naruto what's wrong?", Momiji asked. "Yeah he's actually been quiet.", Shikamaru noticed.
"Guys we have to stop calling!", Naruto shouted, leaning over Ino's bed. "He's gonna call the police and we're gonna go to juvenile jail!"
"Ugh...Naruto...", said Shikamaru.
Naruto rocked back and forth on Ino's bed."I don't wanna go to juvie...I don't wanna go to juvie...I don't want to-" "Naruto! We're not going to juvenile jail!" "Yeah! We're goin' to regular jail!", Momiji sang out. "Momiji!" Kyo smacked Momiji.
"Waaaaah! Kyo hit me! Waaaaaah!", Momiji cried.
"Heck yeah we're goin' to jail!", Naruto shouted back.
"T-to be on the safe side...can we call another person?", Hinata said quietly. Ino sighed. "Fine."
"Heads up Sasuke!" Ino flung the phone at Sasuke, "Call someone will ya'?" Sasuke dialed the number for his favorite Chinese restaurant. (well he didn't really care much for Chinese but whatever) Someone picked up.
"Hello?"
"Yeah hi, is this McDonalds?"
The man decided to play along. "Yeah, it is McDonalds. What would you like to order?"
"Um...I'd like to order two double cheeseburgers."
"Ok. That'll be one hundred dollars." Sasuke made a face and hung up the phone. "That was retarded."
"Why what happened?", Haru asked.
"I called a Chinese restaurant and asked if it was McDonalds. And the retard said it was McDonalds! And he charged me one hundred dollars for two cheeseburgers!"
"Wow.", said Haru, unamused. "Let's call someone else!", Momiji said jumping up and down. Sasuke dialed 1-800 MATTRES once again and handed the phone to Momiji. "Okay!", Momiji said saluting Sasuke and taking the phone.
"Hello this is 1-800 MATTRES how may I help you?"
"Wo waren Sie?", Momiji said in German.
"Huh?", Albert replied utterly confused.
"Tranken Sie mit Ihren Freunden?"
Kyo leaned over toward Haru. "What is he saying?", Kyo whispered. "Beats me.", Haru whispered back. Momiji shut the phone laughing.
"Hee hee hee!", Momiji giggled. "That guy didn't understand a word I said! Ha ha ha!" Momiji rocked back and forth in his chair giggling.
"Oi, Momiji-kun!", TenTen yelled from the top of Ino's bunkbed. "That was funny, do it again!" Momiji's eyes brightened. "Okay!" Momiji dialed the numbers.
"Hello?" It was Albert again.
"Sie sind solch ein Idiot! Ihr nicht nett Sie-"
"Do you speak Engulishe?", Albert asked mockingly.
Momiji snapped the phone shut and for once...Momiji actually seemed...angry. "Bastard! Wie sich trauen, macht er sich über die deutsche Sprache lustig! Ich gehe dazu-"
"Momiji-kuuuuun!" Momiji turned around at the sound of his name. "Yes?"
"We cannot understand you Momiji!", TenTen said.
"Huh? Oh yeah! Ah-ha-ha!"
Hinata's phone rang, her ring tone being "When your gone" by Avril Lavigne. Kyo answered it. "Hello? Oh..uh-huh." He handed Hinata her phone. "Hinata it's your mom."
"H-hello? Um...yes mom um..in about half an hour? I-is that okay? Ok, ok, bye." She hung up. "It was my mom, she asked when I was coming home. I said in half and hour." "Ok.", Haru said.
"Coming to think of it I have to call papa soon.", Momiji said. He took his phone from Ino's bureau and called his dad. Momiji said some stuff in German (which no one could understand) and hung up. "Yup!" Momiji winked. "My dad will pick me up in half an hour!"
"That means we only have a few more minutes for one more phone call.", said Haru.
"Oh no! We have to do at least one more!", Momiji shouted. "We've used everyone's phones and if we keep going we'll all have HUGE phone bills! Unless..." Momiji looked at Kyo. "Nuh-uh!", Kyo said.
Momiji clung to Kyo's leg. "Come on Kyo pleaseeeeeeee?"
"I said no! Get off my leg you little rabbit!"
"Please please pleeeeeeease??"
"Come on Kyo!", TenTen said. Momiji gave Kyo puppy eyes. "Please?"
"Ugh fine!", Kyo said he gave up and gave Momiji his cell phone. "But be careful with it."
"Ok!"
"Hello this is 1-800 MATTRES how may I help you?"
"Yes this is Mr. Fichzgerald from the muffin company.", Momiji said in a very fake masculine voice. "We'd like to know if you want to purchase any muffins. We have all kinds of muffins! Banana muffins, chocolate muffins, regular muffins, cartoon muffins, invisible muffins, rainbow-banana cherry muffins and the consumer's favorite the blue-"
"So you'd like to buy a muffin bed?"
When Albert said this it caught Momiji off guard. He didn't think Albert would interrupt him. "Actually...no! Here is my customer-Mr. Grumpy Kins-"
"Hey!"
"who wants to buy the muffin bed.", Momiji finished. He handed the phone to Kyo.
"So you want a muffin bed?"
"Uh...yeah!"
"Ok then! I'll charge the bill to your phone number which is 718-590-2287 correct?"
Kyo snapped the phone closed. "How the FUCK did he know my phone number?! Momiji! You did put in 74 before you wrote the rest right?!"
"Uh...yeah I think so..."
"Oh great! You think?! If you didn't I am going to so fucking kill you!!"
Ino took the phone from Kyo and looked at the past phone calls. "Yup, he did." She showed the phone to Kyo." "Coming to think of it...I think 72 is what hides your number...", Shikamaru said. Kyo jumped up to strangle Shikamaru but Hatsuharu grabbed the back of his shirt, choking Kyo. "Now, now calm down.", Haru said.
Kyo's phone rang "Black Parade." "Hello?", Kyo answered.
"Yes this is Tom Kowalski from the Police Department and-" Kyo closed the phone and his face was almost as white as Hatsuharu's hair.
"Who was that?", Hatsuharu asked.
"It was the p-p-police..."
"The police huh?", Haru said.
Ino's mom came in and set down little cartons of milk for everyone. "Yay milk!", Momiji shouted grabbing his. Everyone else grabbed there's, including Kyo whose hands were shaking so badly he could barely take out the straw. "Don't worry, calm dow Kyo.", Haru said soothingly and took a sip of his milk. "Mmm...this is good. Anyway, the guy who called sounded alot like Albert. There's a good chance that it was him trying to teach us a lesson."
Momiji climbed to the top bunk on Ino's bunk bed. "Anyway you could call back and apologize.", Ino said. Momiji leaned down from the bunk and held his milk out to Kyo.
"Heh heh...moo." "Shut up Momiji!", Kyo yelled. "Well...anyway you could call back and cry crocodile tears. It works when you want to get out of a parking ticket! Well..at least one of those cop shows..."
"You watch too much TV Momiji!", Kyo scolded him. TenTen put her arm around Momiji and stroked his hair. "Bad Kyo. Don't take out your anger on Momiji. Poor thing..."
"It's true what Haru said.", said Sasuke as he walked over to Kyo. "That guy did sound alot like Albert." Kyo buried his face in his hands. "I'm gonna get billed for a muffin bed...shiiiiiiiittttt..." Kyo's phone rang again. He kicked his phone over to Sasuke. "Answer it dammitt." Sasuke picked up Kyo's phone. "Hello? Uh...yeah. Ok sure. Bye." Sasuke hung the phone up. "It was Momiji's dad. He's downstairs. How the hell did he get your number?"
"Oh my dad has everyone's numbers!", Momiji said.
"Ok guys byeee!!", Ino said.
"Byeee...", everyone waved to Hinata, Kyo, Haru, Momiji and Sasuke as they all piled into Momiji's dad's car. One by one Momiji's dad dropped them off until it was only Momiji, his dad and Kyo left. Momiji opened the door for Kyo. "Ok bye Kyo!", Momiji said. "Oh and tell me if you ever get that muffin bed, okay?" Momiji smiled as the car sped off. Kyo stared in the direction Momiji's car went.
"Yup. He was a mystery that kid.", Kyo thought. "You never know what he'll say or what he'll do next. He walked into his house and closed the door, which ended the day of prank calling and...big trouble.
. The End .