Best Friends Shouldn't Do That, Idiot

IkkixKazu

DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything from Air Gear. That would be wishful thinking. What's mine is a pack of extremely cool (tastes like it's frozen) menthol cigs that I burned while making this little fanficlet, or whatever you call it.

This is my first shot of making a fanficlet in the Air Gear fandom. By the way, if slash or two best guy buds getting metaphorically close squicks you, then scram. *smokes*


"Oi, Kazu. You there?"

Just when I thought that it will be a peaceful day: no team practice, no classes, no reason to get out of the house. For a second, I wonder why you even came.

"Man, I know you're there. Nee-san told me."

Since when did you call my sister Nee-san by the way? Ah. Weather's really ready to overwork air conditioning units. As if I have one. It's cooler here inside my room, but I didn't say it's like Antartica cold. Hail Kami-sama for exhaust fans that suck out hot air, preventing the inevitable transformation of my room into the fiery depths of Muspelheim, Hell, Naraku, Jigoku, or whatever you call it. Suit yourself.

Lying on the semi-cool floor just wearing your boxers and a plain white wifebeaters seems to be a logical choice right now. I'm not going to move, unless there's a good reason to do so. As of the moment: absolutely none. Ikki isn't dying or something along those lines. He'll get the point soon.

Footsteps (yeah, that is what I heard probably) heading away from the door made sense. You actually got the idea. Yay. That's five stars for you.

...only to be hit by a pebble. Tch.

"Head shot." Ah. Your voice is telling me you're up to no good.

Again.

I suddenly rose and whipped my head towards the window to see Ikki wearing our trademark Kogarasumaru jacket and his ATs. Damn. Ikki, it's summer. Believe me, I love the team, but I'm not wishing to be a sweat-braised Kazu on top of freshly-steamed, fluffy white rice anytime soon.

"What's with that look? C'mon. You and I should go out." And you sounded really demanding. Ha. With that cocky smirk and confident posture, I'm not seeing things, am I?

Go out? As in 'go out'? Are you out of your fucking mind? Gee. I must have said 'out' for how many times in a row. The world must be turning inside-out. Dizziness surely is one of its signs.

"Fuck Kazu!" How many times should I tell you not to wear your ATs inside my room? Those scratches will be there forever.

"Damn the floor."

Typical Ikki. Always ready to save the damsel in distress. Too bad I'm not Simca, or maybe Ringo. Darkness came pretty quickly and I drifted away.

Cool. This is Eden. Paradise. And it smells like alcohol, one that's being used in hospitals. Tch. I always have that. You know, with ATs, you're bound to get hurt. That stings on scrapes. Big time.

"Eh? Settled. Tell the others that I'm calling it off. Kazu just passed out earlier. Later, Buccha." Click. Eh? What was that all about? Me? Passed out?

Pillows. Bed. Antiseptic smell all over. Plus something that will never be left out.

"Ikki." Holy... Did I sound that weak. Not good. Everything that I've worked hard for... No. This is not happening.

The bed dipped, the crow's weight compressing the side of its mattress.

"Kazu. Damn. You almost gave me a heart attack! That pebble must have done a number on you!" Hah. It takes more than a pebble to bring me down, you idiot.

Ikki isn't the big man in asking for forgiveness - he's got a big chunk of pride, you know. At least he sounds apologetic today, or -

"You were out for like, an hour and a half." Whoa. Where did that cold tone come from? And it's already night.

I better say something. "What time is it?"

"A little past seven."

I got up, my hand fumbling with a cold, pink towel on my forehead, smelling faintly of that antiseptic. Wait. Fever?

"Seriously, you should take it easy." Ikki is laughing at my rather uncoordinated movements. It's pathetic, I know. His chuckles are irritating, as if he's always mocking me. I'm only second best, right?

"I called off the practice for today - even if it was supposed to be just for an hour. You should be grateful." Tch. Stop smirking like a total retard. If my glares could kill, you're space dust now.
"How stupid of you to stand up hurriedly from lying on the floor. Haha. Now you learned." Come to think of it, heat and sudden change of blood pressure really don't mix well. Yep. I'm not friends with those two. Never.

How come he just takes my mind off the topics I usually dwell into? I'm not even deserving to be by his side. A shadow, a tag-along, these suit me more. His wings are real, mine are just metal, artificial. Yes, I'm the Jet. Hah. As if that would even matter. He is the Sky, and I'm just flying in the fan-fucking-tastic vastness of it. Tough luck.

"I assume you're okay now. Better put on some clothes and we're going out - " He must have noticed my turmoil, or maybe not. He's dense, just like that. And why am I even affected by that 'going out' phrase anyway? We do that most of the time.

" - for a leisure run. Shinobi Path. Sounds good?"

"Sure thing. And what are you planning on doing after the run?" He never runs out of other things to do after these runs. Like my personal training - which I'm so not looking after. Sore muscles and bruises from my own training alone -

"It's a secret." Ikki actually looks cute when he winks. He never grows up.

When did I start thinking along that line?

**IKKIxKAZU**

The Shinobi Path is our code (yeah, that's childish) for the route starting from either Ikki's or my house and heads straight along the streets, then changing directions every so often. It is an extremely fluid route. Ikki sucks at naming things. This is certainly not the way of a ninja. Oh. The name speaks for itself. By the way, this circuit requires us to -

"The wind feels so nice when you're leaping from one roof to another!"

Ikki. You're such a kid. Watching too much anime can rot your puny little bird brain.

"Race me to the vending machine!" And he zoomed away, leaving a trail of dust and leaves (?) in its wake. How can he just do that? I'm definitely asking him later. I don't see any trees nearby. Ikki, wear a shinobi outfit and go cosplay somewhere. Come to think of it, black cloth, fishnet chest covering and throwing shurikens fits that idiot crow. Hot, I must say. Minus the ATs. These babies are the shit, but they don't go well with ninja outfits. It'll stand out like a sore thumb. Totally insane combination. Nu-uh.

I don't know what that show is. I'm bad at kanji, so I never asked what's the title of that friggin' anime. Only Ikki watches that anyway, especially when he sleeps over. Tch. I'm not having a mind theater with that bird-brain under the spotlight, am I? How otaku of me.

But Ikki wearing JUST ATs...

Right. That pebble just messed up my brain. You're so going to pay, Ikki.

Anyway. Hah. Challenging me? I'm the Jet. No one outruns me.

"Loser buys the other a drink!" I screamed. Even if he's out of my sight, I know he heard me.

This route is easy. No sharp turns. I can do this. You'll be coughing it up, Ikki. I clutched at my dirty white beanie and begun racing the crow. Of course, this will be a piece of cake. He can't use the shortcuts either. He doesn't tolerate cheating. Hah. That's the Kogarasumaru head for you.

The wind laps on my skin in a mesmerizing way. It is a little too harsh though; my precious beanie almost got yanked away from my blond head.

Ikki gave this to me back in middle school so no one would tease me. Being naturally blond has its disadvantages, apparently. Ah. That idiot. Our fate was sealed just like that. It was oversized when I received it, now it covers my head pretty nicely. It also smells like Ikki when he gives me a noogie. Tch. Stupid idiot. Most of the time, it's sweat, citrus and cinnamon. In not-so-rare cases, it's cup ramen. Crap. Last week, it was seafood, for Kami-sama's sake. It reeked of my shampoo, my sweat, his sweat, citrus, cinnamon...
Then toss in some egg droplets (They are a bunch of soft and fluffy, happy yellow fellows. Give them eyes. That'll be cute.), imitation crab and shrimp. Ugh.

"Oi! Is that really the Jet? What a slowpoke." Ikki, are you pissing me off?

...because that worked pretty well.

"Why you..!" Ikki, houses, buildings, lamp posts, traffic lights. They all are a blur. A mere splash of color to my peripheral vision. All I can see is that faint light from afar. The vending machine.

Ikki. I will never be a shadow. You will consider me your equal. You just wait!

At last. The fucking automated drink store. And Ikki's not here. I definitely won. Boy, the run can make my throat a drier-than-dry sand dune in the middle of the Sahara desert. I fucking need a drink now.

Ten seconds. Ikki should be here by now. Facing the drinks inside the dispenser, I'm currently thinking what that idiot should get for me.

Fifteen seconds. Hmmm. Maybe the usual. Argh. My hand is itching to get a few coins from his pocket and get a drink. Now.

Twenty seconds. Is he safe? Did he trip again? He's not idiotic enough to cross the streets wearing ATs and get hit by a speeding truck. That might be the end of this thirsty, still-waiting Kazu.

Twenty-five seconds. Nerve-wracking. I... Tch. There's a lot of other teams who might want to debilitate Ikki. I've seen far too many. Blood is involved in most cases. Not a pretty sight. Tch. Five more seconds, I'm turning back and someone's going to pay if that person did lay a finger on the crow - his best friend.

One.

Two.

Three.

Four. I'm starting to twist, eager to sprint and go on crow-searching.

Five. A soft click of what sounded to be AT wheels touching concrete surely is music to my ears.

"Wow. You just mopped the street with my ass." Ikki is suddenly standing there, grinning like an idiot (he actually is, no two ways about it), a bit too close, holding a bottle of sour lemon soda (the usual) which is now cooling my slightly sweaty forehead. Good thing my beanie offers a mediocre level of insulation. Nah. My head won't get a frostbite. "Congratulations."

I have to admit, you are fucking cool in this moment. Where did you get that line? And still playing ninja by dampening your usually noisy, screechy landing? He won't hear me saying it out loud though. It'll just be adding lighter fuel to his barbecue grill. Burnt meat isn't gourmet. Ikki's ego should be better left alone.

"Idiot. What took you so long?"

He popped the bottle open and pushed it against my slightly heaving chest. Damn our height difference. I feel a little small. "Fuck Kazu. You did well. The Jet really is living up to expectations."

"You didn't answer my question." He made me worry. Now taste my wrath.

"Outrunning me by more or less thirty seconds, together with a very unstraight route? Damn, you're amazing me every single time, man."
Pfft. As if that would make me feel better. I'm still nothing. Nothing compared to him. He's Ikki. I'm just Kazu. JUST. That's the keyword. Don't make me repeat myself.

"Why don't we head to the Path's end?" Oh. That water tower. Yeah sure.

"Of course."

The short trip was uneventful. We surely took our time. Taking a few sips of the refreshingly tart drink, I sat on the ledge of the platform with my back facing the idiotic bird-brain while Ikki had his hands on the back of his head while leaning lazily at the metal receptacle. Our sticker was near the crow's left elbow, gleaming in the moonlight.

"Kazu." He is serious. I wonder what we'll talk about.

"Eh? What's up man?" I'm positively unsure how this conversation will go. I'm beginning to feel trapped.

A sigh left the crow's lips. "Stop pushing yourself."

So he had seen those bruises. That's why I really want to take the day off. I'm still a little sore, but hell, that race earlier did good. I feel that I might have strained myself today, but I'll worry about that later. This talk must be long overdue, judging from Ikki's tone. I need not to glance at him to confirm that.

"You're good. Too good." I can't follow him. Deflated. Exhausted. That's the best description I could think of for his demeanor today. That hurt. He can't be unsure. Where's that hyper, overconfident Ikki? If you happen to find him, please tell me.

"..." I'm... Tch. I can't even get myself to talk.

"I'm starting to notice that you're inching away from me. I don't even understand you sometimes. I'm your best friend! I'm supposed to know what's wrong!"

Ah. The struggle to be better. To fit your side. Not to be just under your wing. Your fucking attention.

Now that I realized it, all I am craving for is for you to recognize me. You always look at Simca. That beautiful swallow. I bet you hang around with her a lot. Yeah. Right. Those 'personal' training sessions? For Kogarasumaru. Nothing more. Nothing less.

I'm currently gripping at the bottle tightly and I urged my dangling legs to meet the cold metal platform in order to stand slowly, turning a little to see your angry look. "With your idiotic bird-brain, I highly doubt you'd even comprehend."

Ikki growled, looking more furious, walking towards me and gripping my collar. God, Ikki. That hurts. "Try me."

Alright! Alright! I'm jealous! Tch. Someone as dense as you will just ask 'Eh? How in the world..?' and become the most clueless bird-brain in the world. Treat me as an equal, will you? Like you did before this AT thing started. I refrain from meeting your gaze. It just hurts. I don't want to burn this scene in my retinas.

Suddenly, your hold faltered. "You're... jealous?" If this is an ordinary day, I would have laughed my ass off. It isn't.

I didn't say my thoughts out loud, did I?

"I'm... I'm sorry Kazu." The crow... apologized? That's new. "I never ever thought of you as inferior and such. I swear I didn't mean it that way. Remember the times when you were hurt because I pulled you into this AT world? I wanted to make you stronger. So you would not get hurt the next time - or badly if we might be in a little pinch."

Whoa. You just blabbered stuff as if you're scared. What are you scared of?

"I'm... I'm afraid to lose ya, man. So get stronger. With me. With the team. I don't know. It scares me when you get all beaten up and become unresponsive. Tch. Reminds me of the first day we battled Buccha."

I'm speechless. Tch. I could never get really pissed off with this idiot. He averted his gaze and looked far away - the Tokyo Tower.

"Don't do that again. Never train by yourself. Stop making me worry. That..."

When he's being soft and mushy, I might just smother him with... Whoa. Am I thinking straight? I'm not quite sure about myself either. Pushing the bottle to the crow's chest, he hesitantly looked at me. All he could see now is a trademark Kazu grin.

Ikki sported a small smile. Tch. That's way better than his crazy grins. Downing the remains of the bottle, his face scrunched.

"Damn! How could you even like this? It's like... Car battery acid!"

Oh no. He did not inhale MY drink. Ah. There's no getting away from this. Not even Ikki. I'm getting it back. Now.

And I just pulled him into a... Tch. That's so... Weird. He tasted like sour lemon soda, and something certainly Ikki. Instant ramen? Maybe he's out of funds again.

"That's way better than Simca described..." Oh. The talk about the birds and the bees, eh? It seems that you're shocked, then you looked... How do I put this? Contented? How come? You seem to be comfortable with this. Where's the skirt-chasing Ikki? I wonder what the crow and that swallow had chirped about. "Can we, like... do it again sometime?"

Now I got his attention. This should take some getting used to.

"Best friends shouldn't do that, idiot."

However... From now, I beg to differ. Fuck rules.


This is an epic fail and the two are just OOC. Lol.
I'll write more. Maybe.

Bye-bye.

Sakuraba Ryuichiro, playing Tales of Phantasia while nursing a beer and smoking as usual.