Title: Offenses and Confession
Fandom: Digimon Xros Wars
Author: The Analyzer
Characters: Shoutmon, Lilymon (Mysterious Love Declarer).
Genre: Humor/Romance
Rating: T due to loads of innuendo and sexual implications.
Status: Complete.
Note: This takes place in the middle of episode 31, before Nene comes back with information from the Betamon and Ganimon she scared the daylights out of.
Disclaimer: I don't own Xros Wars. That's Toei and Bandai, who I wish get enough ratings and sales so the Digimon franchise would continue.
Summary: After Nene steps out to collect information, Shoutmon assures Lilymon, offends her with innocent innuendo, and the unlikeliest person present has a love declaration to make.


"I'll be going out to investigate some leads." Nene was saying. Her alligator costume was already on and she had her hand on the flap of the tent entrance. "You will wait here while I confirm Taiki-kun's suspicions."

"Alright." Taiki nodded seriously. "Sparrowmon, be sure to look after her."

"Leave it to me!" Sparrowmon said, pumping a tiny fist.

Nene smiled. "How very gallant of you to ask, Taiki-kun. Though you know I can take care of myself, right?"

"O-of course!" Taiki said, grinning sheepishly. "But even the most independent person around needs a second pair of eyes to look after them and Sparrowmon has the most experience in…that area…I'm not making myself look good, am I?"

Nene waved a dismissive hand. "Don't be bothered by it. Besides I was just teasing you." She slipped the alligator head on, completing her disguise. "Well, see you all later. Hopefully with some good intelligence."

"Right. Good luck, you two!"

With that parting from Taiki, Nene slipped out of the tent and Sparrowmon zoomed out after her. Taiki stood still until Nene's footsteps and Sparrowmon's signature hover sound faded into the night.

"So, now what do we do?" Shoutmon asked.

"We stay here," Taiki said, "and wait."

Shoutmon signed in resignation and Taiki gave him a sympathetic smile. Waiting wasn't one of Shoutmon's strong suits. He was a 'mon of action, after all! Whenever Shoutmon had to wait, he could only think of all the Digimon who were suffering in his inaction. This feeling was especially magnified now Dorbickmon had his Xros Heart team members. Nevertheless, Taiki had explained many times that waiting was part of the game and Shoutmon had come to accept it.

But that didn't mean Shoutmon had to like it. With his "I can't let them be" streak, Taiki probably felt the same way. But he was the General of Xros Heart and he was gifted with strategy and foresight.

Shoutmon glanced around the tent, feeling talking to someone would suppress his action itch. Taiki was quietly talking to Dracomon, whose crimson eyes were serious. Judging by the tone of their whispers, they were probably discussing battle plans. Taiki would tell the rest of the group of his plan later. Every now and then, Dracomon would glance at Shoutmon. Shoutmon turned away, not wishing to distract the pair.

His eyes fell on Kiriha. The General of Blue Flare was leaning coolly against the tent wall, eyes closed and arms folded. Shoutmon couldn't resist scowling at him. He was not fond of Kiriha. Treating one's subordinates like weapons was enough to raise Shoutmon's enmity, especially since he had come to greatly respect Greymon and MailBirdramon. His discouraging words against the cute Dracomon definitely didn't raise Shoutmon's view of him. He wondered what good qualities Taiki saw in this jerk.

Then his eyes fell on the final occupant of the tent and he smiled. Lilymon was staring worriedly into the air, her eyes unfocused. She was probably worrying about the fate of Shoutmon's teammates and how they all would survive the battle. Lilymon had been a childhood friend of his, and he was still fond of her. The sight of doubt in those dark eyes moved Shoutmon to assuage those fears.

"You okay there, Lilymon?" he asked.

"Mmm? Oh, I'm fine. Just worried about everyone."

"Well, don't worry about anything!" Shoutmon boasted, bumping his chest. "We'll rescue our friends and show Bugra the consequences of messing with our world."

Lilymon smiled. "That's assuring to hear. There had been rumors going around of your team's exploits. If any of them are true, then the Village of Smiles is… very proud of you."

"Awe shucks." Shoutmon said, rubbing the back of his head. He tried not to let the praise go to his head, which can be often difficult. To distract himself from such an event, he said. "But the village is proud of you too, Lilymon. You have some very nice assets."

"Oh, do I?" Lilymon asked, tone changing

Shoutmon didn't pick up the unpleasant expression that flashed across her face. "Yeah, you can dance like no 'mon can! When you put your mind to it, you can stun Bugra goons pretty well. Not to mention you are pretty and people take notice of your-"

"Yeah, go on." Lilymon interrupted. "What do people notice out of me? Probably nothing deep, right?"

Shoutmon stared. Now that he paid attention, Lilymon's voice had a hint of venom behind the sweetness and her glare was quite obvious. Still, what could have wrought this reaction?

"What? Did I say something to upset you, Lilymon?"

"Oh, I don't know. I have 'some very nice assets?' I can 'dance like no 'mon can?' When I put my mind to it, I can 'stun Bugra goons pretty well?'"

"What are you talking about…" Shoutmon trailed off, eyes widening. "Oh. Oh! No wait, Lilymon, I didn't mean-"

"So my village is proud of me just because of my looks?" Lilymon said, voice rising angrily.

"No! I was just talking about your dancing abilities. You know, like the time you danced when Taiki and the others first arrived. Those were some pretty sweet moves and all."

"Yeah, those were some pretty sweet moves." Lilymon said. Shoutmon relaxed. "In fact, I remember you telling me to perform those sweet moves onto Taiki so he would stay and become your General!"

"Oh, please don't bring that up. You know the whole Digital World was at stake! I couldn't let our only salvation slip through our fingers! And besides, look where we are now! We have an organized resistance that could give those Bugra goons a run for their money."

"But in the end, it was you who persuaded Taiki to stay. So did I really have to act sexy in order for him to stay? I was just a useless lust object after all!"

"No, you're not! When you put your mind to it, your Flower Cannon packs quite a wallop and you were key to a couple of victories. I wasn't talking about distracting the enemy with sexy."

Lilymon didn't soften. She crossed her arms and turned away with an "hmph!"

"Flower Cannon can be a term for something else, you know, and not just as an attack."

Shoutmon groaned. "Oh c'mon, you know I wasn't talking about that. Alright, I said some words that could have a bad meaning and they offended you. Okay, I was wrong. Happy now?"

"Almost." Lilymon said stiffly. "What were you going to say about my people liked besides my prettiness?"

"I was going to talk about your personality, that's all! People like how nice you are. Combined with your beauty, they might want to get to know you better."

"Oh, so that pretty face of mine helps them along, does it?"

"Well, you are beautiful! I might be into guys, but even I can tell you are good looking. Doesn't mean they are shallow or anything, they would just notice it with your personality."

"You'd be surprised." Lilymon muttered. She turned firmly away from Shoutmon, a tactic she used when she wanted to end an argument.

"Geez, you can be so stubborn." Shoutmon muttered, turning his back to her as well and stomping away. "Girls. I'll never understand them."

His feet carried him to the other side of the tent. Shoutmon paused when he realized he might run into Taiki and Dracomon, thus distracting them from their battle plans. Then another realization hit him as he raised his gaze. The argument had already caught their attention and the pair now stared at him in surprise.

"Uh, sorry about that." Shoutmon laughed sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head. "Didn't mean to distract you two with our argument."

"I didn't know."

"What?" Shoutmon blinked at Taiki.

"I didn't know you were gay, Shoutmon. Not that it's any of my business, though, it's your life and all…"

"I didn't tell you?" Shoutmon shrugged when Taiki shook his head. "Well, all of my teammates know and I was pretty open about it back home, so I thought you knew."

"Ah, okay. I must have missed all the signals then."

"Alright. I must have sent even clearer signals to my teammates. They would have to know when to scram back when ChibiKamemon and I were together. Thank goodness the X Loader has a lot of space, otherwise the moments when we slept together would be-"

Shoutmon cut himself off, heat rushing to his cheeks. Even though the flush couldn't be seen through his red skin, Shoutmon hastily turned away as Taiki's face registered increasing comprehension.

"Okay, now that topic would be none of your business!"

"Of course. I won't comment." Taiki hastily said.

"So you like sleeping, Shoutmon?" said a third voice.

Shoutmon turned and saw Taiki do a double take. Shoutmon had to do a double take of his own, but there was no mistaking Dracomon's youthful voice. The young dragon was blinking at him with friendly expectancy. Shoutmon's thoughts rushed into overdrive. Was that an innocent question or not? Maybe he should keep the answer vague. If Dracomon was talking about something else, then it would be better not to go into details.

"Um, sure. I sleep all the time. If Starmon was here, he'd say something silly like I was the greatest sleeper in the Digital World." Shoutmon put his fists on his hips and laughed loudly.

Shoutmon saw Taiki look at him as though wondering if he was telling the truth or not. Shoutmon bit back a groan. This was not turning out to be a good night for his dignity! Being kicked around by Bugra forces would be easier on his pride than accidentally offending his childhood friend and warding off questions from a young dragon about mature topics. He calmly waited for Dracomon's disinterested reply and thought of asking Taiki the details of his plan. But Dracomon's next words caught him off guard.

"Really?" Dracomon asked. His eyes lit up and there was a strange flush in his green cheeks. "I mean, I wouldn't want to force you, but doing it by myself can get pretty lonely after a while. Ever since you saved me today, I couldn't stop thinking about you and maybe if you're available-"

Shoutmon blinked twice to make sure the one positively describing his physical features was a really a green and cream colored dragon with stubby orange wings. Was he hearing a love confession from Dracomon, in a tent the night before dangerous raid? Kiriha seemed to be having similar thoughts. His expression didn't change, but he swiftly leaned into the darkest part of the tent. Shoutmon envied how flawlessly he pursued that action.

*This day just keeps getting weirder and weirder.* Shoutmon thought. After a bit of musing, he added. *Well, Dracomon seems enthusiastic. And there are worse 'mon out there. He's probably a trap like ChibiKamemon was, though that's not a bad thing. Just need to be prepared.*

Shoutmon just nodded distractedly as Dracomon rambled on, and made a noise of an ascent to a relationship. Fortunately, Nene and Sparrowmon returned and they got to work on the plan to save their friends. Lilymon sat next to him as they talked, but said little. Shoutmon told himself to take one step at a time with her when she only gave him a tentatively friendly look. And when Kiriha expressed shock at Dracomon's involvement, Shoutmon found himself jumping to his defense with a bit more vehemence than usual.

The End


- I'll probably be posting more drabbles and short one-shots as I work on my larger works. The Xros Wars ones would probably be "missing scene" ficlets like this one.

- Yes, the romance might be contradicted later in the show. I doubt they would define such things for the parties involved, though, so I'm going to write it anyway.

- If your wondering what "trap" means, it will be explained in a prequel ficlet. The one who uses it has his own personal definition for the word.