A/N: Hey! Did someone ask for a pirate AU? Your wishes have been granted by the multi-chapter genie. Enjoy!

Pirates Ahoy!

By AK

Nico takes a deep breath of the salty sea air, closing his eyes with a sigh.

He was leaning on the intricately designed railing of one of his father's many merchant ships. His father had the wonderful (read: horrible) idea to send his son on a business venture. For "work experience".

It wasn't like he was going to do anything anyway. He just had to sit there and smile at some influential people. Maybe sign a document or two for namesake.

He was just a figurehead, a mascot.

Someone of enough value to take his father's place when he was busy, so that the other party wasn't offended, yet whose absence wouldn't be easily felt.

And he hated it.

He hated that he would never be anything of value.

He hated that nothing he would ever do would make a difference.

What was the point of living if one could do nothing?

It wouldn't make a difference if he just- died.

Nico thought about all the ways he could die at sea.

A rogue wave could send him flying over the rails.

They could run adrift and die of starvation.

A storm could wreck them.

A sea serpent could eat them.

A siren could drown them.

The sun could sweat them.

An illness could take them.

A demon could find them.

An iceberg could hit them.

An enemy could sight them.

He could fall asleep of sheer boredom and drown in his soup.

The barnacles growing underneath the helm of the boat could grow unchecked, eat through the wooden hull and sink them.

Hm.

Weren't there a lot of things that could happen?

Nico suddenly felt cheered.

He was too much of a coward to commit suicide, so any of these would be a pretty nice way to go.

Oh! And of course, there were-

The sound of drawn metal.

The sharp chill placed against his neck.

The stench of no-good braggarts.

A thrill went down his spine.

-Pirates!

Hm.

This wasn't quite what he had quite expected.

Nico stood above the prone forms of three sea-faring menaces.

He hadn't expected them to be so… weak.

This was a problem.

How was he going to die if they couldn't even overpower him?

Hopefully, they had a bunch of comrades who were better at this than they were.

Hopefully, they'd come abode to avenge their buddies' fallen honor.

Hopefully, they'd actually be able to kill him.

Nico sighed.

This was becoming a lot to hope for.

"What shall we do with them, young lord?" asked the old captain.

His hair had turned completely white with age, his tanned face had wrinkles deeply entrenched in them and every line of his was harried.

Nico felt sorry for him, somehow.

"Put them in the brig," commanded Nico and went back to leaning over the rail.

He wondered how hard he needed to pray to create a storm.

"What kind of a monster was he?"

The shout carried over the still waters of the night, as did the shushes that followed.

"Quiet."

The curt instruction was given by an old man in white regalia.

"Poor Jason," said a Latino boy with dark skin and oil stains emphatically, "You have to deal with him day in and day out. How long has it been, a week already?"

"He isn't that bad," said the old man with a suddenly young voice, "He sticks to that railing most of the time and doesn't order us around much."

"Aw, come on, you needn't shield him. I heard him tell you not to touch the barnacles."

"I heard that too!" said a smaller version of the aforementioned Latino, "'Let them grow', he said, he did!"

"Really?" asked a girl with feathers in her hair, intrigued.

"Isn't he scared that they would grow unchecked and eat through the wooden hull?"

The one called Jason suddenly morphed into a young boy with blond hair and a bullet track on the side of his head.

"I think he knows better than to believe in that old sailor's tale," he said practically.

"It's true!"

"Yes Harvey, but it will take a long time for that to happen. It usually isn't seen on new ships like this one."

"Do you think he wants to keep them as pets?" asked a guy with a healer's mark on his wrist.

"Aw, that would be so cute!" cooed his sister.

"Nah, I think he's just getting suspicious at the number of times we're using that excuse to stop the ship."

"Do you think he knows something?"
"Nothing solid, I'm sure."

"But still. He ordered soup for dinner!"

"And what's wrong with that?"

"He didn't even eat it! He just stared at it for an hour before he pushed it away!"

"Maybe he thought it was poisoned."

"What was his excuse?"

"'It's gotten cold now' he said, he did!"

"I heard that too. Thought my ears were deceiving me, I did! Sounded genuinely annoyed too."

"Okay, fine. He is odd at times," Jason smiled, his scar curving upwards.

"Well, that is what you'd expect from him," said a big guy with Asian features, "He's famous, after all."

"Who would expect the Nico di Angelo to be the son of Hades, the richest guy in the South Islands?"

"I know, right? Great looks, extraordinary strength and a powerful background to back it up. Some guys have all the luck."

"But have you heard? Rumors say that Hades is actually Pluto, one of the three great masterminds of the Underworld."

"Ha. Good luck proving that."

"But seriously, come on. Nico di Angelo is a Hero of Justice. How could he possibly have a crime syndicate head as his father?"

"KDJS manages just fine."

"KDJS is a character in a comic book, Leo. Nico di Angelo is a living breathing individual in real life. Got it?"

"Hey, don't diss KDJS!"

"I'm not, I'm just-"

"Guys, guys, break it up. Someone might wake up."

"Who would? Those land-lubbing bastards are all knocked out."

"We need to send word to the Captain."

There was collective groaning.

"What, that we got our asses kicked?"

"If you're going to do that, at least cover it up with how pretty you think he is."

"Really, Pipes? Really?"

The shadows cast by the torches shielded his pale figure from stray eyes.

Nico smiled, sinister.

So this was where the Captain went.

Well, well, well.

What do we have here?

Pirates infiltrating his ship?

He couldn't have that now, could he?

Nico knew just what he had to do.

He slipped away from them soundlessly.

He sneaked back to his small, personal cabin.

He reached under the covers of his bed…

Pulled them over himself and fell asleep.

What?

He had prayed for a storm, hadn't he?

Now, he hoped that it would be a big one.

Also, it was a pity about the barnacles….

A/N: What do you think? Don't forget to review!