~*Elementary, My Dear*~
Somehow she hadn't reached the conclusion earlier.
~*X*~
She's in the room again, which comes as no surprise since she's always there.
Naoto says nothing, though she can see her from the corners of her eyes. She's secretly hoping that if she doesn't look at her, she'll just go away on her own. There's an empty space before her, with only a low table standing between her and her Shadow. Of course, she stands idly for only a moment before sitting down across from her and propping her chin on her hands.
And she wonders—do the others still receive visits from their Shadows?
She makes no comment, pointedly turning a page in her book. Detective novels. They had been her whole world when she was younger, and on a whim, she had decided to pick one up from the bookstore on her way home a while ago. She had even chosen one for Souji, at his request. His eyes had lit up with interest as he read the summary on the back. The memory makes her smile.
"This is new, isn't it?"
Naoto didn't reply, but her Shadow is undeterred. She isn't looking, but she knows that she's smiling, her yellow eyes docile as the Child aspect of her being giggles happily.
"You shouldn't ignore me," pouts her Shadow, when no response is forthcoming.
"I'm not ignoring you." Naoto speaks reluctantly, flipping to yet another page. "However, I am trying to finish this book, so if you would be so kind…"
Her Shadow grins. There's something dangerous about the set of her teeth and the gleam of her eyes, and for a moment she imagines that the Scientist aspect has asserted itself. But no. When next she speaks, it's still unmistakably the Child. "You're just reading to keep your mind off of…something."
The way she says the last word makes it clear that she's insinuating something. "You shouldn't play coy. You and I both know that we share the same train of thought. If you have something you wish to say…" She leaves her sentence hanging, waiting for her Shadow to pick up the slack.
Her Shadow lifts her hands, causing her long sleeves to drape even more noticeably than before. She claps her hands together in a way that can only be described as juvenile. "You love him too!" She says happily. "You just don't want to admit it yet."
Naoto very nearly spits out the tea she had just swallowed. Placing the cup down carefully, she glares at her impertinent Shadow from the other side of the small table. She's suddenly grateful that it's late at night and she's in the privacy of her room, greatly lowering the odds of her being caught speaking to thin air. "…Did you show yourself just so you could—"
Her Shadow's demeanor abruptly changes. Her playful (if razor-edged) smile becomes a cold sneer that halts Naoto in her verbal tracks—it's extremely reminiscent of the many men in her life who have condoned her involvement in law enforcement. "You continue to deny it, and yet you know it is the truth!" The Scientist snarls, her tone condescending. "Every day you have seen him at school, and yet you cruelly act as if his confession never occurred! Your reasoning is nonsensical, that you couldn't bear to become a woman if it meant you had to be protected by a man, since you know he does it as an act of affection more than anything else, not as an insult to your ability! He is anything but sexist, and yet you refuse to allow yourself to think about him, denying him even a response to his statement! And so he suffers…suffers because you are afraid to speak up."
Naoto tries to ready a response, but her Shadow's next action proceeds to throw her off. The Scientist's mocking smirk vanishes, to be replaced with the wobbly smile of the Child once more. "I…I don't wanna be alone…" She eyes her meaningfully. "What if the knife had been real? He wouldn't have left you all alone…You know he would have put himself in mortal danger for you…"
"That…That is true, but—"
"But what?" Her Shadow cocks her head to the side, and at the moment she can't tell if it's the Child or the Scientist staring at her questioningly.
Exactly, Naoto. But what? She isn't sure that she has an answer for that. She doesn't want to say that she needs protection, and she was still furious at Souji for running to "guard" her, but at the same time…
"He really cares about you," says her Shadow softly. "What about you?"
With that, her Shadow disappears into the air, causing white particles to sparkle like stars before they, too, fade from sight.
A Shadow is everything that one represses about oneself. If her Shadow formed just long enough to speak with her about Souji, then it stands to reason that she was repressing her feelings about her senpai.
It's a rather rudimentary deduction, and she's surprised that it took this long just to reach it.
"I…" She feels a blush form before she has even fully spoken the words. "…Love Souji Seta." The words taste strange on her tongue, and she keeps her head bowed.
Her Shadow laughs with childish glee.
Author's Note: Eh this started out as a random drabble...And it ended up longer than I meant it to. It really was an excuse to write the totally awesome Shadow Naoto. Review, or not, don't care much since this piece is sorta sucky.