Disclaimer: I own nothing but the idea.

Percy's POV

My heart sank as he watched Kronos's army destroy their defenses. We were backed against the Empire State building, and our own forces were fading fast. As Kronos's chariot came into view, a strange sound, like dying robotic elephants, ripped through the air. Wind began to blow, and a blue police public call box appeared in the middle of the street.

Both sides froze as the doors were flung open and a man bounced out. I blinked. This man was extremely fond of the color brown. Brown hair, brown eyes, brown suit, brown coat. The only clothing that wasn't brown was his shoes. Bright red Converse sneakers. I heard the Aphrodite campers gasp in horror.

The man glanced around, seemingly unperturbed by the war that was taking place around him. And then his eyes landed on Kronos.

"Well, this is interesting! I thought to myself, I've been to past New York and New New New New New New New New New New New New New New New York, so why not go to present day New York? And what do I find? Amateurs mucking about with time!" the man ranted.

"Who are you?" Kronos snarled. He wasn't pleased that his slaughter had been interrupted.

"Oh, sorry, did I not introduce myself?" the man asked, shocked. "I'm the Doctor."

"Doctor who?" Kronos snapped.

The Doctor grinned. "Just the Doctor. And who are you?"

Kronos gaped. It would have been funny if we were paying attention. I mean, really, someone who didn't know who Kronos was?

"I am the Titan King Kronos, the Lord of Time!" Kronos said, enraged.

The Doctor looked even more baffled. "What are you talking about? You aren't a Time Lord."

Kronos turned purple. "I am the only Lord of Time! To imply otherwise is blasphemy!"

The Doctor looked almost…pitying? "Look, I know this is difficult for you, but the influx of Artron energy and Huon particles in your system increasing your ability in temporal manipulation isn't really supposed to be there. In fact, a quick zap with the Beta-5816-Omega setting should flush that right out," the Doctor said, pointing some sort of blue and silver device at Kronos. Luke screamed as the gold essence of Kronos streamed out of his mouth and eyes. He slumped over his seat as the Doctor turned to the gathered monsters.

"Now, I know you lot are not supposed to be here," the Doctor scolded. "Let me fix your teleports for you." Again, he pointed his device at the monsters, which promptly exploded into dust.

"Right, that's that sorted. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to investigate a diet plan that works," the Doctor tossed over his shoulder with a grin, heading to his blue box. We stood there, stunned, as the noise started again and the box faded from view.

"Percy," Annabeth said slowly. "What just happened?"

I shook my head as the Olympian gods appeared. My father raised an eyebrow. "Well done, Camp Half-Blood."

"It wasn't us," I said absently, still staring at the spot where the police box had been.

"What do you mean?" Zeus demanded.

Annabeth turned to Athena. "Mom, who's the Doctor?"

This time, the sight of godly beings gaping was hilarious.