Zim's Voot Cruiser shuddered as he entered the atmosphere of Earth, and he braced himself against the back of his seat, the buckles wrapping around him automatically as the ship prepared itself for a rather bumpy landing. It was of small make, so as to be quick for escapes, and was not outfitted with unnecessary things like weapons. Only sporting two engines that took up most of the mass, and were light shades of purple in color, as was the entirety of the ship, it was clearly designed for scouting missions and not much else. He arrived in a quiet forest somewhere just outside one of the more populated human cities, and began performing diagnostics immediately when the ship was stable and grounded, testing the atmosphere for breath-ability as the computer performed all necessary checks and scanning the local area for any signs of life. Zim activated his PAK's suit just in case the air was not breathable, the skin-tight material snaking out of his PAK and forming around him, a slightly lavender helmet encasing his head and then appearing to vanish. He hopped out of the Voot after the scan had concluded that no life forms were in the immediate area, then opened a hatch on the front of his small ship, greeted with the vibrant, pink smoke of a damaged Light Core as it billowed out from the compartment.
"Oh, Irk, this will take forever," he hissed through his teeth, cursing himself for neglecting to perform maintenance before leaving, and cursing himself again for dealing with so many complications that he could have pushed off on a smaller Irken before he had to leave. Now he was stranded on some water-filled planet out in the middle of nowhere, with only the bare minimum of Intel on the species, and no safe way to get back. He climbed back into the Cruiser after assessing damages. It wasn't anything serious, mostly just stress from using light speed so often and rarely ever servicing the Core. He checked the scans again, finding that yes, it was the core, though the rough landing had put some stress on the left engine as well. Zim scowled. He hated Voots. They were fragile, outdated, and the most simplistic of Irken ships, but the only thing he had been able to secure on such short notice. Or, rather, he had given no notice, and had been forced to take his old Voot, rather than a newer, more reliable model. He cracked the joints in his hands and his fingers hovered over the console, but he hesitated, antennae perking at the sound of an alert.
The right-most screen on the dash was flashing, and underneath readings that told him the Earthen air was breathable, though a tad less dense than the air on Irk, was a warning that alien life was nearby, and approaching quickly. His antennae flattened against his skull, and he shouted a myriad of curses as chirps and clicks in frustration, pounding his fists against the console. He was not supposed to make contact with the locals, he was not supposed to be noticed, he was not supposed to be here at all! This was not the rendezvous point! He had overshot the rendezvous point by about a parsec because of his filthy, damaged, obsolete Voot! He disengaged his space suit, and pulled at his antennae in frustration, for a moment smelling and hearing nothing but static. He had to disguise the ship, and he had to disguise himself, which would set him back again. Oh, the Tallest would have his head for this.
He began typing quickly, eyes flashing between the command console and the alert screen, filtering through the data he had been given on Earth for their primitive vehicles, and choosing one of suitable size to shield his Voot. He then skimmed over the details on human life, choosing a proper disguise for himself that, when finished, was dispensed from the dash in a small metal box. He opened the lid and removed a smooth metal necklace that latched around his throat. The air around him shimmered, and he ceased to appear as an Irken, but rather a young human, hopping out of his Cruiser and waiting in a habitual parade rest for the intruder. Minutes passed, and then a pair of lights appeared in the trees at the fringe of the clearing. A sleek, black car appeared, and rolled to a halt upon seeing Zim standing there. The side hatch opened, and out climbed a taller human, wearing a large, primitive sight-device on his face. Zim tried not to gag at his appearance as the human approached, expression hostile at first, and then slacking with confusion upon seeing Zim. He looked around himself, and took a few more slow steps out into the clearing, holding some remote device out in front of him. Zim waited, patiently, for the human to speak.
"Uh, hi there," he called out, not looking at Zim, who found this highly offensive. His PAK began to whir immediately, registering the new language and latching on to the signals transmitting all around him to find and download it, "Have you seen, a, uh... Well, did you see anything... weird around here just now?" his eyes, white, black, and honey colored, finally fell to rest on Zim, who grinned.
"No, I have not," he called back politely, enjoying how his voice echoed around the clearing, not a hint of accent to be found, "I was having quite the normal evening until you appeared, actually."
"Uh-huh," The human said, seeming unimpressed. He eyed Zim closely, and then stopped walking when he was only a short distance away, "Well, I was running an atmospheric scan, you know, like you do, and I noticed something very peculiar near the end, very strange, so," he paused, glancing up to the sky momentarily and lowering his small device, "I came out to investigate. You sure you didn't see anything?"
"No, I did not see anything out of the normal, boring, average ordinary," The human sniffed, seeming to take slight offence, though Zim was unsure at what. He decided to smile a bit wider, in an attempt to put the thing at ease, but this seemed to serve the opposite purpose.
"Right," he took a step back, and looked down at his remote-thing, as if simply for something to do, "I'm just detecting some radiation in the area, is all, and a foreign frequency. The same frequency my scan detected. Ya'know, the atmosphere scan," he glanced up at Zim again, "So, uh, what are you doing out here?," his gaze shifted to Zim's disguised Voot, "I didn't see any tire tracks... Is this your car?" Zim tensed slightly, but kept his grin fixed in place.
"Yes, it is my normal transportation vehicle!" Zim said, injecting affection into his voice and straightening slightly, but not relaxing his parade stance, "There is nothing unusual about it, and nothing unusual about me, Zim, for that is my normal human name!"
"Uh... huh," The human narrowed his eyes, inspecting critically the turned-up dirt and slight skid marks that were visible in the fading light "Well... it's nice to meet you, Zim... Do you live in town?" Sensing that the human was getting suspicious, Zim avoided the question, resorting to recently-learned human manners.
"Uh, well, you know, I don't believe Zim caught your name?" he said, attempting to be friendly. He held out his hand, which Dib shrunk away from, and Zim's grin slipped slightly. He was losing patience, and itched to do away with this puny, offensive thing. He would have to settle for diplomacy for now, reminding himself that someone might miss this human, that his disappearance might seem suspicious, and that was the only thing, apart from the fact that he would have to be, yet again, delayed on his mission, that kept him from frying this disrespectful creature in his tracks.
"It's Dib," the human, Dib, said after a moment of silent deliberation. He fell quiet again, and Zim, finding the human's wordless gawking extremely impolite, let his grin fall into a look of mild irritation, pretenses dropping.
"Can Zim help you with anything else, or would you like to annoy him with other unnecessary inquiries?" Appearing to hearing the venom in Zim's tone, the Dib-human's expression turned mildly hostile again, but he seemed to relent, turning away from Zim in a decidedly rude fashion, and Zim bristled and could not help but call out, "And you should probably work on your manners, Dib!"
The human did not respond, diminishing Zim's satisfaction slightly. He watched as Dib climbed into his car and began to back out of the clearing, waiting until the lights had begun to fade, and then he exhaled, tension fading and irritation rising. He hastily climbed back into his Voot, making sure that the human Dib was out of his radar range before dropping his disguise. He kept the Cruiser camouflaged just in case any more filthy humans decided to encroach upon his clearing, and, with dread in his squeedly-spooch, he contacted his Tallest.
They were not exactly pleased to see him.
"So let me get this straight," Tallest Red, the most peeved, chirped in a tone that was just barely containing his clear anger, "You left the base in an Outmode, overshot the rendezvous point by an obscene amount, neglected to cloak yourself upon entering a foreign atmosphere on a stealth mission, failed to message our contact and your mission informant, and then, to top it all off, you were detected by an alien native and you didn't use a cloaking device, again, and instead chose to use camouflage, even going so far as to engaged the human. Is that about right?" Tallest Red had said all of this rather quickly, clearly very irritated, and Tallest Purple, standing next to him, nodded fervently along, though he seemed more interested in a bag of snacks he was nursing. Zim tried to look as pitiful as possible when he addressed his Tallest.
"Well... to be completely fair, it was a stressful situation, and Zim was already running late-"
"And whose fault is that?" Red snapped, Purple chiming in briefly with a quick,"Yeah!" before turning and watching something off-screen. Zim shifted nervously, trying not to outright grovel on his knees for forgiveness, and still managing to maintaining a dignified attention.
"Perhaps someone should have... given Zim a better ship... beforehand?" Zim said sheepishly, perhaps pushing it a bit, but hoping that his Tallest would take some humor from it.
They did not.
"We did give you a better ship, Zim, but you were so late you didn't get to pick it up," Red said, exasperated, and began typing something into the console in front of him, "We're going to notify our informant to come back to base. The mission is cancelled until further notice, because of your mistakes," he then muttered something else quietly, so that Zim was clearly not intended to respond, but would still be able to hear it, "It figures you would fail at a simple extraction mission. I should have known better."
"Wh... Bu-but, my Tallest, Zim is already here! I can still proceed, if the contact will only-"
"Waste her time and ours? No, Zim, the mission has already been compromised," Red spoke, purposefully not even sparing him a glance, and Zim's hands itched, the word 'compromised' ringing around in his skull, and the self-destruct button built into his glove was suddenly feeling very heavy and tempting. He waited, silent, caressing his right wrist nervously behind his back, for his Tallest's verdict. Purple spoke up, also not looking at Zim, but at the screen to the slight left of the video feed. They were shaming him, it seemed, both of them refusing eye contact. Zim felt this was a tad unnecessary. He felt ashamed enough as is, but he did not dare say anything.
"So, eh, it looks like it'll take a couple weeks Earth time to get somebody out there," Purple said nonchalantly, and inhaled another doughnut. When he spoke again, it was through a full mouth, "You can head straight to the Massive, with the escort. We'll discuss you're punishment when you get back!" Rather than sounding authoritative as Red had, Purple's tone seemed more scolding, though it still somehow still held the same weight that a death sentence did. Zim stopped rubbing his wrist, and bowed to his Tallest, effectively ending their correspondence.
"Yes, my Tallest," he said, tone dutiful, though the transmission had already been cut.
if it wasn't clear, dib thought he was being made fun of when zim insisted he had seen nothing out of the ordinary. that's why he seemed offended.
i'm a little rusty writing-wise, because i haven't been writing as much as i used to, but hopefully this turned out alright. if you see any mistakes, let me know! and constructive criticism is always welcome! is the description cheesy? i feel like it's cheesy.
anyway, as a rule, i never promise to finish fics, but i'll do my best to keep continuing this one, ahaha. so, i hope you enjoyed, and thanks so much for reading!
EDIT: i updated this chapter! just did a bit of editing here and there. i wanted to preserve the author's note, though. it felt wrong to delete it.