A.N
My story for Harlequindays , my 200th Reviewer for my story, Past the End's reach. Go check it out! Hope you enjoy this, Read and REVIEW!
sBc
Disclaimer: I do not own avatar, nor do I make any profit from this story.
Fears and Gifts
Katara and Zuko
Rating: T
The looming shadow's voice hissed low and long in the depths of Zuko's dream.
"You will learn respect."
He twitched, the horror twisting across his face.
"Suffering will be your teacher."
Zuko burst upright in silence. The sweat from his forehead dripped into his eyes and out, mingling with the tears that showed the strain of not crying out.
The nightmare had visited many times in the years following the event, but never more regularly than now.
Now, when his life was content and productive, stable and full.
The Fire Nation had regained her economy and her sons. The war was done, and Ozai was silenced.
His wife slept peacefully beside him, tired from her joyful burden.
He eyed the swell of her soft form, and was struck again by awe.
The fierce desire to protect and support beat against his heart, and he reached for her, drawing her into his embrace urgently.
Katara.
She stirred, cooing softly, before mumbling, turning to face him, still asleep.
Zuko reached for the blankets, pulling them down to subject her stomach to his gaze.
The soft rise of his child greeted him, soft and vulnerable against its mother.
He rubbed his hand along the planes of her stomach, reassuring himself with the soft movements that pressed against his palms.
Katara stirred from the kicking, fighting to remain dreaming, as her blue eyes cracked and sought him.
"Hello."
He smiled, for her.
"Hey," he whispered.
"Why are you up?"
Her question reminded him again of the reason she awoke.
"Confirming."
He chuckled at her confused look, before it dawned on her.
"Again?"
He nodded.
"Zuko," she sighed.
"I know."
They looked at each other for a moment, tortured eyes meeting a sleepy gaze.
Zuko had awoken without fail each night, to watch her sleep, soothing himself with the knowledge of her safety.
"I'm afraid."
The words were soft, and so unlike her husband that Katara doubting she had heard them.
But the downcast gaze and the urgent press of his hands to her stomach confirmed his whisper.
"Why?"
Zuko took a breath.
When Katara had come to him with the news, glowing and anxious, he had been shaken to his core. It was not quite unexpected, and not at all unwelcome, but the words struck him into silence.
After nearly two months of marriage, it was impossible to be shocked, but the words refused to be clear, and he had stared at her until her face fell.
"Are you…unhappy?"
"…No."
"Then why…?"
"I…can't…think."
"Why?"
"What if it's not enough?"
"What if what's not enough?"
"I don't know how…"
She had smiled softly and taken his hand, pressing it to their child for the first time.
"We'll learn."
Her quiet confidence still amazed him. It came as no surprise to him that she would be an excellent mother. Taking care of a misfit group of heroes had taught her well.
She had been thrilled throwing herself into preparing, dragging everyone with her.
Iroh had cried for joy, hugging Katara until her breath had fled, and then getting amazingly drunk and singing the news at the top of his voice.
The people had been ecstatic. An heir meant security and celebration.
After the initial shock had worn off, he had swept her into a heated embrace, canceling his meetings to worship her body for its newest gift.
The fears had returned that night, while she lay soft and asleep in his arms.
Katara entwined her hand with one of his, pausing the motions of his anxiety.
"Zuko?"
He took another breath before releasing it with a low sigh.
"How do I know I'll be any better than him?"
She didn't answer, waiting for him to meet her eyes.
"Because you already are."
She pulled him to her, and he loomed over, careful to not press his weight upon her.
Their lips met softly, before she pulled away smiling into his eyes.
"We always have Iroh."
He grinned.
"Besides," she said, "Do you honestly think he'd let you near me if you weren't capable?"
Her words reminded him of Iroh's own.
"They are blessed."
They had been standing together in the garden watching Katara talk to the child.
The pride and faith in Iroh's words still caught him. Iroh trusted him. Katara trusted him. It was all he needed to try his hardest.
He kissed Katara again, gathering her into his arm, her back to his chest.
He lightly rested his hands on her stomach. It moved beneath his fingers.
"Goodnight little one."
The news had come suddenly in the heat of the day. Zuko had been pacing in his study, collecting his thoughts before he faced his council.
The servant had been young and out of breath. He didn't bother to knock.
"My Lord!"
Zuko turned to the page in acknowledgment. His thoughts ran away from his grasp. What's happened? Is she hurt? Is the baby…?
"The lady, My Lord! It's time!"
Zuko barely heard the boy's last words. He ran through the lit corridors, anxious to reach Katara.
He burst into a cool room where Katara lay, surrounded by chittering women and happy nurses.
Katara's mentor had come to deliver the child, arriving a month before the due date.
Yagoda comforted her know, pressing a cool cloth to her forehead and murmuring lovingly.
"How long has she been…?"
Zuko's words caused a flurry of excitement. He found himself pushed to the front of the room.
"Very fertile"
"Strong heirs."
"Lots of children!"
The women's whispers made him blush and Yagoda shooed them with an impatient hand.
Zuko came to stand before his wife, who was watching him with a soft, calm smile.
"Hello."
"Hey," he whispered.
Yagoda turned to him. "Her water broke all of ten minutes ago, she's already had a few beginning twinges. It seems the child is impatient."
He nodded slowly.
Katara smiled up at him, looking relaxed and serene.
"How are you?" He was anxious. He was terrified she would be in pain.
"You look worse than I'm feeling."
He nodded, accepting her words. The low mirror on the wall attested to the transparent shade of his face.
Yagoda left silently, and Zuko stared helplessly at his wife.
"I can't do anything?"
"Not much."
"Oh."
He let his breath out in a whoosh, and grasped her hand gently.
"Uncle's going to be devastated."
Iroh had left a week prior to visit Toph, delighting in the teas she always mananged to find for him.
Katara smiled.
A spasm crossed her face, tightening it in distinct discomfort.
"Katara!"
It passed quickly and she shook her head at him.
"This is normal, Zu-zu."
"Are you sure? Should I call…?"
"Zuko."
He met her eyes, instantly calming at the peace and excitement he found there.
He nodded, taking a seat beside her to await his child.
Yagoda had kicked him out rather abruptly an hour later. The labor had begun in earnest and Yagoda protested that he would make Katara anxious.
He left unwillingly, pacing alone outside the doors, muttering over the injustice of water tribe women.
A high, keen cry met his ears, and he turned to the door in terror.
Katara had cried out more than once, and he had nearly broken down the door at first before Yagoda smacked him upside the back of the head, pushing him into the hallway once more.
He had paced for three more hours before a sob of agony reached him.
He nearly shouted out in fear before he heard a wail accompany the cry.
He stopped.
It was over.
The wail sounded again.
His child.
He was a father.
The babe cried again, proclaiming its ire at leaving its mother's warmth.
He went to the door, waiting anxiously.
One of the nurses assisting opened it slowly.
He rushed past her, his gaze seeking the exhausted figure of his wife.
Katara's eyes drooped, but her chin was high as she smiled weakly up at him, tears in her eyes.
He kissed her forehead when he reached her side, brushing a loose curl behind her ear softly.
She shifted a bundle in her arms.
His eyes followed the movement and started at the tiny face visible in the blankets.
"Katara?"
She nodded, tears of joy spilling down her cheeks.
He lightly touched his fingers to the sleeping angel, soft skin meeting the rough pads of his hands.
"He's so small."
Katara laughed weakly.
"He's supposed to be."
He watched the bundle move with the breath of life, and was awed once more.
How could he ever deserve such a gift?
He watched as Katara slender hand grasped his, pulling it securly under the child.
"Katara?"
"Hold him."
Zuko slowly stooped, stretching out his arms to cradle the child, staring at the tiny visage before him.
The child was a milky tan color, with an impossibly soft tuft of dark hair already in place upon his scalp.
"Perfect."
Katara's voice reached his ears softly, and he looked up to find her watching him and their son.
He returned his eyes to the boy, brushing a finger against a small, curled fist.
"Absolutely."
It didn't matter if he hadn't been good enough.
He would be now.
A.N: Hope you enjoyed. REVIEW!