Okay, so this is an idea that just randomly popped into my head and I thought would be fun. Enjoy. :)
DISCLAIMER: If you recognize someone or something, chances are that I don't own it.
Elphaba walked into the first bar she was able to find, ignoring the stares she was getting as she plunked herself down on a stool at the counter and sighed heavily.
"I don't really care what you give me," she said to the bartender, "just make it strong."
The man nodded and went off to get her drink.
"Rough day, huh?" a voice said.
The green girl looked to her right and found a young man about her age watching her from a few stools down.
"You have no idea," she replied.
"Oh yeah? Just try me," he said.
"You want the long version or the short version?"
"Either one, makes no difference to me."
"Big brother bullshit, for starters. Just moved out on my own, spent half the day unpacking and the other half job-hunting. Best friend who doubles as my new roomie is probably out spending money that we don't have to spare right now. And, oh yeah, let's not forget the extremely long-winded and pointless lecture I got from my highly religious father and sister about 'resisting the temptations and urges to sin that will be brought on while living in the City.' Nothing but stuff-and-nonsense, as my old nanny would say."
"Pfft, please, you think that's bad? I've got you beat a million times over."
"Is that so?"
"Yeah, and I can prove it, too."
"Then by all means, go ahead and do so."
He picked up his drink and moved down the bar so that he was in the stool beside her, settling into place as the bartender put Elphaba's drink down in front of her.
"First of all," the young man said, "I just got back from visiting home, where I always have to help take care of my blind little sister, not to mention both my nephews and their sister, the oldest of whom is nine and the youngest of whom is five. Their mother is my twin, and each one of those three children has a different father because their mother is just that much of a fucking slut. They don't even know she's their mother because she abandoned them with me, my parents, and the blind sister when they were newborns. Anyway, the oldest of these children has a habit of climbing on top of the courtyard walls, dropping his pants, and peeing from up there. He thinks it's the funniest shit in the world, but like I said, he's nine years old, so it's really not that surprising that he finds it so amusing. My roommate here in the City also happens to be my cousin, and the only reason I'm not at home crashed out in bed right now is because he's got a girl over there, so I was basically kicked out of my own apartment, and I'm kind of scared of what I'll find them doing if I try to go back tonight, so I'm probably gonna have to get a room at some cheap-ass motel or something and wait until tomorrow to go home. Oh, and, uh, one more thing? I got fired from my internship today because apparently I 'don't have what it takes' or some kind of cliche shit like that. I honestly don't really know, I kind of just tuned out everything that came after the part where my boss said, 'We're gonna have to let you go,' all I heard from that point forward was literally just, 'Blah blah blah, blah blah blah blah, blah. Blah blah.' So there you go. Try and beat that if you can."
"Your sister is blind? Nice, come back and talk to me again when she's crippled and in a wheelchair. Because that's how mine has been for literally her entire life, she was born prematurely and with her legs all tangled up, and even though the doctors got them untangled, she's never been able to use them and probably never will be."
"Niobe is blind because a firecracker went off too close to her face when she was seven, and for a couple hours, it looked like we might lose her."
"My mother lost so much blood giving birth to Nessarose that she never woke up when the whole thing was over. You wanna know how old I was at the time? Three."
"My cousin who's back at the apartment used to have a fraternal twin brother. Know what happened to him? He was mauled to death by some wild animal when the three of us were twelve, that's what."
"Yeah, well, I have four things that will put this to rest once and for all."
"And what might those three things be?"
"I was born with green skin, my father hates me for a good reason, it's my fault that my sister is crippled and my mother died, and the only people who have ever truly loved me are my brother and my best friend. There, that's all my cards, your turn, try and top that."
There were several beats of silence between them, during which his brow remained furrowed in thought and his mouth sort of gaped like a fish's as he kept opening it to speak and then closing it again when he realized he had nothing. Finally, he let out a heavy sigh.
"Oh...fine," he said, "you win."
She smirked in triumph.
"Told you my life sucked more," she said.
"Okay, okay, you don't have to rub it in."
He flashed a lopsided grin and held out his hand.
"Fiyero," he said.
She looked at the offered hand for a moment, then reached out and shook it.
"Elphaba," she replied.
"Isn't there like a goddess or something name Elphaba?"
"Saint Aelphaba of the Waterfall. Like I said, my father is a bit of a religious fanatic. And your name is...Vinkun, if I'm not mistaken."
"Arjiki, to be exact. Yeah, I was next in line for the Arjiki throne, but I decided to renounce my crown and pass that torch to my sister."
"I've never been to the Vinkus. Kind of hard when you live in Munchkinland most of your life. I've read a lot about it, though."
"Aren't you a little tall for a Munchkin?
She laughed.
"It's mostly farmers and poorer families who are short. The rich ones tend to be taller, and it's possible to marry into height."
"So which one is your excuse? You rich, or did someone along the way marry into it?"
For a moment, she hesitated, brushing some hair behind her ear.
"My father is the governor," she said finally.
"Oh, damn, are you serious?"
"Part of me wishes I wasn't."
"Yeah, I know what you mean. Why do you think I rejected the throne to come live in the EC?"
There was a pause while they both swallowed some of their respective drinks.
"So," Fiyero said, "care to elaborate on why your father has a good reason for hating you?"
"I pretty much already told you why. It's my fault, what happened to my mother and sister."
"How's that? You said you were, what, three years old? How could it have possibly been your fault?"
"Well," Elphaba said with a sigh, "you can very clearly see my skin color in this lighting, and so basically what happened is that when my mother was carrying Nessarose, our father was afraid that the new baby might turn out..."
"...Green?"
"Exactly."
"So...?"
"So he made Momma chew milkflowers day and night. Only they made Nessa come early, with her little legs all tangled up. And as I said before, our mother...she never woke up. None of which ever would have happened if not for me."
Fiyero sat there absorbing this information in silence.
"My best friend," Elphaba continued, "likes to say that it was the milkflowers' fault, not mine. And maybe she's right. But who am I to say? Especially when I've grown up my whole life being blamed for it."
"I...I'm really sorry," he said quietly. "If someone had told me it was my fault that Astalebaen got mauled, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. He was one of my best friends, more like a brother than a cousin, and...even all this time later, I still can't believe he's gone."
"Yeah, well," she murmured, "life's a bitch and then you die. Nothing anybody can do about it, right?"
There was a long pause as they sat there together, each of them lost in their own internal musings.
"You know what we both need?" Fiyero said suddenly.
"What's that?"
"To get completely wasted. I'm talking like so fucking hammered that we won't even be able to remember our own names when we wake up tomorrow, and we'll be saying that we're not as think as everybody drunks we are instead of the other way around because we won't have a damn clue what the hell is even coming out of our mouths anymore. That way, we won't even know anymore that we're down in the dumps, let alone the reasons for it."
"And if we end up passed out in a drain pipe?"
"Then so fucking be it! Oh, come on, it'll be fun!"
Elphaba sighed.
"Normally," she said, "I wouldn't even dream of doing that sort of thing, let alone with someone I just met. But...I've had a really shit day, and I honestly don't see any way that it could possibly get any worse at this point, so...yeah, sure. Why the fuck not, let's go for it."
"Awesome! In that case, the next round's on me. Oh, and I should probably warn you, I tend to get pretty dirty-minded when I'm wasted."
"I have an older brother who acts like a child half the time, trust me, I am used to that sort of thing."
"Good. Now, let's get this show on the road, bitches!"