My half of an art trade with the beautiful, magical, scrumdiddlumptious Fallendire. I love you, mi waifu! You're an amazing artist and I hope this lives up to your level of epic win. Also, the document had so many red squiggly lines while I typed this that it just about made my head explode. For realz, yo.

This was written fueled by tea (Earl Grey, English breakfast, and black currant), Placebo, and the PSG soundtrack.

Reviews fill me with

Unimaginable joy

And motivation

"Have any threesssss?"

"gofish"

"Sssshit…"

Six horns rose over the tops of three chairs, clustered around a card table. The table was in the middle of a room that resembled nothing so much as a bombed-out shelter in a war zone. The stack of grenades against the far wall might have had something to do with this.

A television, tuned to an episode of The Thrash Prince of Bel-Air, went muted and ignored in the corner. Three trolls were intently buried in a riveting game of go-cuttlefish, gray skins bathed blue in the light from the screen.

Camzit was winning by a safe margin.

"mY tUrn," said the only male of the group, flicking a drooping lock of black hair from his eyes, "dO yOU hAvE AnY EIghts?"

His companions squinted at their cards.

"gofish" announced the slighter one gleefully. Her hoodie was popped up, covering her hair but not her horns. The hoodie was sailor-striped. The hoodie was sleeveless. The hoodie had been purchased from a thrift store. The hoodie made her look ridiculous. Her companions did not mention this; they knew better than to say anything to her that even sounded vaguely like hipster.

The other girl, rather darker in appearance, licked black lips. "Go fisssssh," she annunciated slowly, looking up through her lashes as the male was forced to do so. He pointedly ignored her and she uncrossed and recrossed her legs. Smooth nylon lessened the friction, and she wiggled her toes under the stockings.

"doesanybodyhaveanyqueens" Camzit bubbled.

Marsem cast a sidelong look at Iifrit. "OnlY mY lOvEly IIfrIt."

"Marsssssem!" Iifrit lowered her cards to look at him, surprised and pleased at the comment, "You're ssssuch a ssssshamlessssss flirt."

The boy leaned over and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "what cAn I sAY? yOU brIng Out thE rOmAntIc In mE." Iifrit leaned in a little closer.

Camzit lowered her cards and grinned at the two. "" she bubbled. She had to admit it relieved her whenever she saw them acting this way. It gave her hope for the pair after all.

"How could I not be sssssnuggly with sssssuch a ssssssweetheart?" Iifrit said fondly. She stretched up and pressed a kiss to his cheek, which she followed up by nuzzling him with her nose. "My little charity casssssse."

Marsem smiled, but a blink changed his expression to one of confusion. Another blink, and he was frowning. He pulled away and looked down at the girl. "whAt's thAt sUppOsEd tO mEAn?" he asked, sounding offended.

The smile fell away from Camzit's face. "herewegoagain" she lamented, burying her face in her palm.

Iifrit sat up straighter, suddenly chilly in the absence of Marsem's arm. "Nothing. It wasssss jusssst an obssssservation."

"An ObsErvAtIOn?" Marsem asked, sounding incredulous, "An ObsErvAtIOn On whAt?"

Iifrit snorted. "Oh don't act ssssso cluelesssss. It'ssssss obvioussssss you're dating up. It'sssss no big deal. I don't mind."

Suddenly, Marsem was up and out of his seat, glaring down at Iifrit. "yOU dOn't mInd? yOU dOn't mInd?"

Out of reflex, Camzit stood too. "" she was biting her lower lip, face drawn together in a slight wince on the drawstrings of her concern.

Iifrit remained seated, but she glared up at Marsem with a force that made her tower above him. "Yesssss," she hissed, "I don't mind. You sssssshould be honored that I'm interessssssted in you at all."

"guysguysguys" interjected the concerned Camzit.

"whAt dO yOU ExpEct mE tO dO?" scoffed Marsem, "thAnk yOU On bEndEd knEE?" He grit his teeth.

"pleaseletsnotfight"

"Asssssss a matter of fact, that ssssoundsssss like an excellent sssssugesssssssstion," Iifrit said, eyes narrowing.

"" Camzit all but yelled, frustrated to no end. The other two shut up to turn their glares to her. "" She sounded exasperated and looked back and forth between the two of them. ""

"whAt, And lEt hEr gEt AwAy wIth All hEr clAssIst bUllshIt?"

"Who are you calling classsssissssst, you worthlessssss olive-blood –"

"Ah hA!"

""

Marsem wheeled on Camzit and the next thing anyone knew, Camzit was being forcibly expelled from the room by Marsem's lusus.

"" her protests were cut off by the door slamming behind her. It would just figure that that wall was the one without enough holes to use as a makeshift re-entry point.

Iifrit was already on her feet when Marsem turned back around. She had stood so quickly that the table had collapsed. Cards scattered to the floor as she stormed over to the man who was currently her knemesis. "What issssss your problem?" she demanded, getting right up in his face. "That'sssssss my palemate you're manhandling! You're ssssssuch a pathetic, ssssssstupid – hey!"

Her back was slammed into bare brick. She looked up, alarmed. Marsem had shoved her away from him and into the wall. He hovered over her, hands on her shoulders, sharp teeth bared as he glared down at her. "whAt's mY prOblEm? trY yOUr prOblEm! I Am nOt AbOUt tO sIt ArOUnd And jUst tAkE yOUr AbUsE lYIng dOwn!" He was very literally shaking with rage. "yOU ArE sO fUckIng EntItlEd! yOU ObnOxIOUs, clAssIst, pOmpOUs, rUdE, hOrrIblE whIny spOIlEd brAt!" He was breathing hard, seething down at her.

Distressed, Iifrit had shrunk into herself, knees bent and back slouching. But her head tilted up to him, eyes wide. This time the change had been so sudden that she didn't even have a decent comeback. Her mind scrambled to fill in the blank and find something venomous to say.

Her eyes darted across his face, looking for a place that was not contorted in fury. She didn't think she would find one, until she noticed that his nose was bleeding. A slow drab olive line creeped down towards his lip. He must have been so upset that he burst a blood vessel.

And it was so random, so absurd, so ridiculous… but she had to comment.

Voice almost lost to his panting, she murmured, "…Your nosssse issss bleeding."

His eyes remained firmly locked on hers as he released one of her shoulders. He brought his hand to his face and dabbed his upper lip. His fingers came away coated in his own blood. Marsem stole a moment to glance at it before reaching out and smearing a small track down her cheek. Neither moved.

All the anger had drained from his voice when he spoke next. "sO It Is."

He released her at last and drew back. He stared at her for a long moment, looking the young woman up and down. And then he turned on his heel and left, slamming the door behind him.

Iifrit was left standing there, her own breathing ragged. She didn't move, keeping her back pressed into the wall as she stared at the empty room. The television blinked from scene to scene soundlessly, the changing light making shadows dance over her gray face.

She drew her hand to her face and swiped through the blood. She stared at her fingers for a long time, rubbing them together, smearing the drab olive across her fingertips. Not understanding why she did so, she pressed the pads of her fingers to her mouth and licked them with her small, sharp tongue. Salt and skin and metal.

Iifrit shut her eyes and sighed.

It could be worse.

It could be red.