Happy 20th Birthday Granddad?
Chapter 1 : My Birthday
I will forever hate this day of this month April 30th! the day I was born. The day I was brought into this world and will probably be the day I die! I hated it because I would grow one year older every day of this month. The boys knew I hated my birthday but Riley with his smart ass would always comment. "Ha ha Granddad is 100 now!" "Ewww Granddad you old!" blah blah blah. Sometime I want to take my belt and just whoop his little ass so hard that he bleeds. Sigh... Life!
"Granddad wake up" ? screamed as they shook me. I lifted my eye mask. Huey and Riley were standing there. "What do you want?" I grumbled as I shifted my body the other way. "Granddad get up" Huey said. "Come on old ass nigga!" Riley said tugging on the blankets. "Alright! Alright!" I shouted as I got up from my bed. "Happy birthday!" Riley snickered. I glared at him. I grab my belt and ran after his little ass. "Boy come ere!" I barked. "No.. Ah!" Riley screamed as I whooped his ass. Huey shook his head.
"I'm just say'n yous didn't have to whoop a nigga so hard!" Riley yelled as he rubbed his butt. "Shush your mouth boy!" I demanded. I grabbed my robe. I put it on as I slipped on my bunny slippers. I walked downstairs and into the kitchen to get me some OJ! Ah... Orange juice the sweet nectar of life! I grabbed a glass out of the cabinet, opened the fridge, grabbed the OJ carton, and poured me some OJ!
I grabbed my glass and walked over to my chair. I sat in my chair and turned on the TV. I sat back and drank my juice as I watched the news.
"Uncle Ruckus (No relation) has been interview after allegedly being shot by a white man" The new reporter announced "This is what he had to say". The news reporter walked over to Uncle Ruckus. "So Uncle Ruckus, what do you have to say about the shotting?", The reporter held the microphone up to Ruckus. "Well I don't blame the white man! White men are just doing what they got to do, and I for one support him for trying to shot a Negro like me! Why... Why have you cursed me white Jesus to be black? WHY?" Ruckus cried into the microphone. I turned the TV off, "That just some bull shit!" I grumbled.
The door bell rang. "HUEY! GET THE DOOR!" I yelled. I could hear little feet run down the stairs, then a opening of the door. "Granddad it's Ruckus!" Huey yelled. I groaned. "What do you want Ruckus?" I yelled as I walked to the door. "Robert did you see me on the news?" Ruckus asked. "Yea, now what does your black ass loving white ass want?" I groaned. Ruckus laughed at his words. "I wanted to tell you happy birthday Negro!" Ruckus laughed as he walked away. "WHY YOU SON OF A B-" I yelled ready to pounce him but Huey held me back. "Stop Granddad" Huey said. I then sighed and closed the door.
I walked upstairs and into my room. I turned on my computer and got on MySpace. I know I said I didn't want nothing to do with women or MySpace but I couldn't resisted. I had made another account. In this account I was a full time billionaire, friends with Obama himself, a rapper, and a cancer life saver who donated money to saving homeless people and puppies. Nothing wrong with telling a little white lie now is it?
I laughed. I looked through all of the women that have added me as a friend. I even had some gay admires. I stuttered at the thought. I came upon a beautiful sexy black women who looked in her mid 20's. I read her profile, her name was Tonya McLoven. I awed at her name, she must make some great loven. It said she is a part time stripper, a nurse, a babysitter, and a upcoming singer. She also loved men with a sense of humor and someone good in bed. I raised a eyebrow. This was my type of women. After reading her profile I went on to her pictures. It had pictures of her in booty short, pictures of her in bikinis, pictures of her in basically anything slutty but she made it look classy! I sent her a message. "Hey there cutie pie, I read your profile and seen your pictures and I have to admit your a damn ass sexy women and I would love love LOVE to meet you, send me back a message lovely. - Love Robert Bitches Freeman" I spoke as I typed. I then clicked the sent key.
I closed my laptop and started to dance. "Uh! Yea! Uh!" I grunted as I danced. Then I heard a crack in my back, "OH MY BACK!" I said rubbing it. I fell to the floor. "Boys!" I called. The came running in. Huey with his katana and Riley with his BB guns. "What happen?" They said simultaneity. "My back!" I stated as I started my dramatic effect. They stared at me like they stared at me when they had thrown the phone into the TV. They shook their heads and walked away. "BOYS! WHAT THE HELL DON'T WALK AWAY FROM YOUR GRANDADDY, HE IS DYING HERE! BOYS!" I yelled crawling after them. "Granddad your being over dramatic" Huey said shaking his head. "Yea Granddad yous needa calm down yous acting to retard right now!" Riley agreed. "Shut your asses up and lift your Granddad up!" I yelled stilling crawling after them. They sighed and dragged me back to my room. "THE HELL! I SAID LIFT! LIFT!" I yelled as I hit my head on the wooden floor repeatedly.
Once we were back in my room they lifted me back on my bed. Huey walked out the room. I glared at Riley. "Haha yous a crippled old ass man" Riley laughed. I fumed with anger. "Not crippled enough to beat your ass to pulp!" I yelled. Riley gulped. Huey had came back with a glass of OJ and a cold and hot back packs. He handed me the pack and the glass of OJ. "Thanks boy" I thanked. "You should take a nap while you put that pack on your back" Huey said. I nodded. Huey and Riley exit my room. I drank the glass of OJ. Then I turn on the pack and snapped it around my chest. I then fell asleep.
(Few Hours Later) (Night Time) I woke up to the sound of the phone ringing. I answer it.
"Hello?"
"Hello Robert this is Tom"
"Yes Tom?"
"We want to invite you guys over for dinner"
"That sounds lovely, we'll be over in a few"
"Hahaha! Ok bye"
"Good bye"
I hung up the phone and got up from bed. "BOYS! TOM INVITED US FOR DINNER SO GET READY!" I yelled. "Ok!" The responded. Before I got ready I opened my laptop to see if that cutie pie responded back to my message. She indeed did. I read her message. "Well Mr. Bitches I would love to meet you to! How about tomorrow at 9? See you then. - Tonya Cutie Pie McLoven" I read out loud. I smiled and responded back with an "ok see you then". I then got ready. I wore a tight black shirt and some jeans. "Boys, you ready?" I asked shutting my door. "Yea" Huey said walking out his room Riley following behind him. We walked downstairs, and turned off all the lights before heading out the door. We walked over to Tom's house.
I knocked on the door. Jazmine answered it. "Hello Mr. Freeman, come in" Jazmine greet moving so we could come in. "Hello cutie pie" I greeted. Jazmine hugged Huey, isn't that adorable. I knew Jazmine had a crush on Huey, but for some reason Huey never treats her right. Also their only 11, they ain't ready for all that. My thoughts were interrupted by a annoying voice, "Robert!" Tom called. I turned around and saw Tom and Sarah. "Hello Tom... Sarah" I greeted. Sarah hugged me. "Hello Robert" Sarah smiled. "Ok come let us eat now!" Tom said.
We all walked to the dinner table. I grabbed a seat next to Riley, Jazmine sat next to Huey, and Sarah and Tom sat at the heads of the table. The food, plates, and utensils were all set out on the table. "Dig in!" Sarah said. We all grabbed the food that we wanted and started to eat. "Damn tees mash potatoes is good!" Riley said. "Boy watch yo mouth!" I warned. He shrugged and continued eating. "So Tom, why did you invite us over to eat dinner?" I asked. "Well I will tell you that once everyone is done eating" Tom laughed. I raised an eyebrow, what was going on?
After a couple minutes everyone was done eating. Sarah took the plates, Jazmine cleaned off the table, and Tom went into the kitchen to get something. I looked over at Riley. "Riley ask Huey to ask Jazmine what's going on" I whisper in Riley's ears. "Aight!" He said a loud. Riley turned towards Huey "Yo Huey ask Jaz-" I slapped him up side his head before he could finish, "I said whisper!". Before anybody else could say anything else Tom came in with a cake, balloons, and presents. I groaned, they invited me over here so we could celebrate my birthday! "Robert I know your not into these kinds of things but we went and did it anyway" Tom said smiling. Tom placed the cake on the table,tied the balloons around the present bags, and placed them beside my chair. "You should have... really" I said. "No, no, no it's nothing!" Sarah smiled, she had paper plates, forks, spoon, and napkins, she sat them down next to the cake. "Jazmine sweetie can you get the ice?" Sarah asked. "Yes mommy!" Jazmine said running into the kitchen. Jazmine came back with the ice cream and sat it also next to the cake.
"Come on Robert, blow out your candles" Tom smiled. I shook my head. "Granddad just do it" Huey said. "Yeas Grandad I want some cake en ice cream!" Riley said. I groaned. "Make a wish" Sarah winked. I thought of a wish, and then blew out the candles. I wished that I was 20 again. "What did you wish for Mr. Freeman?" Jazmine sweetly asked. "If I tell you then it wouldn't be a secret" I winked. Jazmine giggled. Sarah cut the cake and put it on the paper plates while Tom put ice cream next to the cake slices. Everyone grabbed a plate and ate. Once we were done we got up from the table. I grabbed my presents and the rest of the cake that Tom said I could have. Huey, Riley, and me walked towards the door. "Good night thanks for everything" I said walking out the door. "No problem! Bye" Tom said. I turned around, Tom,Sarah, and Jazmine were waving me goodbye. I nodded, turned back around and kept on walking.
Once we got back to our house, I went to the kitchen and put the cake in the fridge. "Whew... boy am I tired" I said grabbing a soda from the fridge. I cracked open the soda and sat in my chair. I turned on the TV. I slurped down my soda. Nothing good was on so I turned off the TV. I recycled the can and walked upstairs. Before going into my room I checked up on the boys, they had fallen asleep. I closed their door and walked to my room. I changed my clothes to my PJ's and hopped into bed. Before going to bed I put on my eye mask. After a while I had fallen into a deep sleep. I am one year older today...
A/N : Yea so did you guys like it? I hope you guys did. Also I am going to make a new chapter everyday! R&R :)