Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters mentioned in this fanfiction, they are under the ownership of Square Enix/Disney

Pairings: AkuRoku, slight SorRiku, slight SeiferFuu

"Dear Journal, its me, Roxas, you know, I thought moving here to Destiny Islands where my cousin, Sora, lives would be the best thing ever, but it seems that's not the case in this situation I've gotten myself into," the young teen paused as he looked for the next words to say as he thought over his first day back in school.

It had been almost two years since the teen had been school and there had been many rumors spreading around school about the blonde haired, blue eyed teen; he had come under questioning as to where he had been for two years. There was a question about his health, someone had spread a rumor that he had been in bad health and had to stay in the hospital a lot because of a blood disorder or even heart problems. Some even questioned that he had been running with a gang and now he was under witness protection because he had witnessed something he shouldn't have. Unfortunately, none of these were true, expect for the heart problem; he had been born with a small hole in his heart and it had been a cause for concern since he was little. Doctors had told his parents that the boy wouldn't live past his eighth birthday, well, that was something to jeer at because he had managed to live past his eighth birthday and he was entering his freshmen year of High School at the age of 14.

"I don't know where to start Journal, the day started out fine, but then…"he paused as he felt his face becoming flush and hot, "he showed up."

The one he referred to as he was a fiery red haired sophomore teen who had by some strange turn of events had somehow fallen head over heels crazy for the blonde teen and his ways of showing his new found affection had made the teen cringe as he recounted the events in his Daily Journal. He had begun making a daily log of things that happened in his life in case he ever became famous and when he wanted to make out his memoirs, he would already be a step up on the truth.

There was also another reason, he wanted to remembered by those that knew him if something were to happen to him; he was hoping that he would be making it through High School, but lately, he was finding it hard to keep his problems under wraps.

"Things started out fine, or as fine as anyone would assume, just as I stepped in the doorway to the school, wait, let me start over," the teen mumbled as he placed his pencil on the journal and push himself back from the desk as he leaned back in the desk chair.

There had been more to this saga then he could entail in this small journal; it was time to go back to the beginning from that morning that lead up to the reason the boy was blushing at the mere thought of the red haired teen. The red head that would later haunt his dreams and cause a strange turn of events to incur in his life; the morning was like any day, but today was different for some reason. He had gone to bed with a light headache that he waved off as pre-first day of high school jitters and stressing over the fact that he had no idea where the school was. He was leaving his trust up to his cousin who only lived a couple of blocks away to lead him to school like a lost puppy and then probably follow him around school all day. His heart had been stable lately without giving him any problems, but when he went to bed the night before, he couldn't help but feel a slight twinge of pain tug at his heart as he laid in bed, curling his knees to his chest.

"Just…breathe…just breathe…it'll be over soon enough, it always ends as quickly as it came," he whispered to himself like a mantra as his eyes relaxed from the clenched position they had been as he started to surrender to sleep.

His heart slowed and the pain drifted away as it always did, but his mind started playing games with his dreams as he started to wonder about the darkness of his mind as he always did; he would find himself staring at a young boy with same hair and eyes as him. Each night, he felt he was getting closer to the boy, but as he started to get to the answer as to why he was always clutching his chest and why he had a hole in his heart; he always found himself waking up. Tonight might be different, it just had to be.

"Hi, how are you tonight?" the teen questioned the young boy as he found him playing with a set of toy soldiers; he seemed drawn to those silly things lately whenever the boy came into the dream.

"I'm good, tonight, I think, I think tonight I'm ready to tell you why I have this hole in my heart," the young boy smiled at his toys as he played with the toys, but tonight, they were different; they seemed to be dressed in little black coats with hoods drawn up over their heads.

"Oh," the teen tried not to show the excitement and amusement in his voice, but his attention was drawn to the toys as he started to become dizzy, "So, what's the big answer?"
The young boy only laughed as he lifted up a cloaked figurine that was holding two key looking weapons in its hands as the other hand lifted up a slightly taller figurine who was wielding a weapon that looked like spiked tire rims; "I thought you knew?" he chuckled as he zoomed the toys around as if they were fighting one another, "Do you know what these are?"

"Um, toys?" he decided to play along as if to humor the boy, "Why do you ask?"

"These aren't just toys, Roxas," the tone of the young boy's voice turned dark as placed them back on the floor and lined up the figurines on the floor in a line, "This is your past."
The teen, now known as Roxas, grew silent and frightened of the young boy as he stood up; his body was shaking; "What? What did you say" his voice growing with concern.

"Your past…you…Axel…Organization XIII…you can't run from it," the boy pointed out the two figurines that were five people apart from each other.

On the Roxas figurine, a shape of a heart was on the outside of his coat, but in the middle of it, there sat a hole in it; it was the size of the head of a pen. As if by magic, the figurine started to come to life as the Roxas figurine feel onto its knees, clutching its chest where the hole in his nonexistent heart.

The hole seemed to pulsate as the figurine looked to its right as one by one, starting with the first figurine; each of them seemed to fade out from light into darkness, then into nothingness. Its eyes drifted to each as it reached the one known as Axel, this figurine's eyes became soft and solemn as he closed them as tried to ignore those vanishing around him, but he opened his eyes as he slowly walked to the Roxas figurine.

Axel was fading with each step as he passed up, Demyx, Luxord, Marluxia, then Larxene; she was a fading memory as Axel started to melt away into oblivion. He kneeled down with what was left of him as he cupped the Roxas' face in his hands, his face was stained with heartfelt tears as he mouthed; "I loved you, Roxas, I always did, I only wish you had been able to accept that from me…May you find your missing heart in the next life," with those final words…he was gone.
"HUH! Wha…wha…what happened to me…"Roxas sat up in bed as his eyes scanned the dark bedroom as the slightest hint of daylight cracked through his blinds, a rude awakening to the reality he was in, "a dream…it was that dream again…Axel…Organization XIII…GAH! That's it! No more soda and sugary ice cream before bed."

The clock was blinking "12:00" which was a rude awakening for Roxas as he took a double take and peered out into the blinding sunlight through the blinds as he noticed that the sun was already partially high above the mountains of the Island. A knock came at his door as his mother's voice woke up him completely as he tumbled out of bed as he forgotten that the bed sheets were wrangled up around his waist and feet.

"Roxas, you better be up or so help me I'm going to send in So---"his Mother started to say, but the rambunctious and extremely hyper voice of his cousin pierced through the morning air and his head as the door flung open.

"ROXAS!!" a loud voice from the brunet shouted out as he flung himself onto the blonde teen who was still struggling to get up out of the bed sheets.

"Gah, Sora! GET OFF ME BEFORE I TELL MY MOM ABOUT HOW HER FAVORITE VASE GOT BROKEN WHEN WE WERE 5!" Roxas' voice blared out the threat that caused his frightened eyed cousin to get off him, "Thank you."

"Man Roxas, you sure are a hard case, you need to lighten up," Sora pulled at his cousin's face into a mock smile which earned him a fist being slammed on top of his head.

The two teens played around for a time until the sound of Roxas' mother bellowing from the bottom of the stairs stopped them, "So, what have you been doing these past 10 years?"

"Nothing that would be of any interest to you," Roxas remarked as he got up and headed to his closet to pull out an outfit for the day as he began to get dressed, "Why?"

"I don't know, maybe because ever since you moved away from Destiny Island about 10 years ago, I've just been curious about what you've been up to, there were many times I would have hopped the next plane to Twilight Town been at your side," he grew silent as he waited for Roxas to butt in or tell him that he was just being an idiot, but it never came, "Each time I heard you were in the hospital, my heart broke a little more that the only person I felt was closest to me, not through blood to where we were brothers, but I always felt we were. I would've given anything to have been there for you, but my mom and dad always told me that it wouldn't be in my best interest to go."

Roxas finished getting ready as he grabbed his book bag, "That's why I only saw them and never you…understandable, you were only a little kid and your parents thought it best that you not be there for something 'scary'" he mocked the word 'scary' as he made a face and continued on, "there were nights in that hospital, when my mom wasn't able to be there with me, and your folks were back home with my mom…there were times…times when I would cry in my sleep…I hated my mom for the longest time for not allowing you to visit."

The two teens stared at one another, neither making a move or saying anything to the other as Roxas' mother's voice calling from the bottom of the stairs broke the silence as Roxas made for the stairs. Sora knew deep in Roxas' heart all that was in the past and they would be together now to face the future, but that future might come at a price, nevertheless, it was about to be detoured slightly as Roxas headed to the door and opened it to find a silver-haired teen standing on his doorstep.

"Hi, is Sora here?" the silver haired teen asked as he brushed his hair from his face.

"Um, I think first things first, just, who are you and how do you know So---"he was cut off as the brunet came streaking down the stairs at full blown speed as he about toppled the teen on the doorstep to the floor.

"RIKU!" Sora shouted as he running tackled the boy to the floor, knocking the air out of him.

"Umph! Hi to you too, Sora," Riku ruffled the happy go lucky brunet's spiky hair, "Oh, I'm sorry, I'm a friend of Sora's and he told me that he would be walking a 'guest' to school today? I guess you're him."

His smile was contagious as Roxas couldn't help but be amazed by the charismatic charm that seemed to ooze from every orifice of his being, but it was causing Sora to nearly melt like putty in the boy's hands. Roxas could see the image of pure bliss that was etched across his cousin's face, Riku was more then a friend; he was much more and that hug was more then just a playful, 'It's been so long, how have you been?' kind of hug.

"Right…so, we going to stand in the doorway gawking at one another like a couple of Chocobo's caught in the rain or are we going to catch the…"his words trailed off as he saw a glimpse of red hair riding the street on a motorized scooter, but it soon passed as the sound of the school buses horn honking.

"Come on, Roxas, you don't want to be late for your first day of High School, do you?" Sora clutched his cousin's wrist, dragging him to the bus with Riku in tow.

The bus was crowded with noisy underclassmen all the way up to the ready to dunk you in a trash can the moment they smelled, "Ode to Fresh Meat Freshmen" dancing off your clothes. It was always typical, the older classmen were always willing to pick on the underclassmen; it never changed, he was the new kid each year and each year that he went up a grade he was always the first target.

For some odd reason, it always seemed that a small to large group of kids seemed to know of when doom day was coming. Roxas always was the victim, never the one to rain it down on the others; he missed that chance on the start of 5th grade when he suffered an attack that most feared would be the death of him.

"Please tell me that they've banned trash canning the underclassmen by this point?" Roxas questioned his cousin, knowing full well that Sora was at least a year older then, or at least a few months older then him.
"I can't say for sure, besides, I've been warned by the Upper classmen to not tell you about whether or not they still are doing it," he looked over to his cousin who got quiet and was sending him daggers with his eyes that read 'When we get alone, I'm killing you slowly and painfully and no one will find the body'.

"Heh…what can I say, I've been out of the social loop for far too long with all those visits and stays in the hospital since Kindergarten," Roxas sighed as he focused his eyes out on the passing road as he knew it would be only a matter of time before he would reach the High School and his first day.

Well, can you blame him for fearing getting trash canned? My friends and I almost trash canned an underclassmen friend of ours, but he ended up kicking the trash can in the process. Either way, read and review guys, it would be appreciated.