Months after Sutton's funeral I got up the bed staring at Sutton's desk, although this was my room for a long time now it reminded me of her and I didn't want to change a thing. Grandparents insisted that if I don't feel comfortable in it I should renovate it. Even Laurel wanted to surprise me by bringing me in the shop and offered her help in picking the new decoration for my room. But I insisted that I am happy with my room and don't want to change it. I left the pictures that Sutton had and all of her dresses in the closet as cherished treasure that I inherited from Sutton. I even kept her phone as a reminder of the time I was so confident to became her. I did receive a new phone, laptop and I bought myself some new clothes and sometimes I even dared to wear Suttons clothes because I didn't want them to go to waste. I asked all the people in my life if I shouldn't wear them but they said that they don't mind and that they are happy to see part of Sutton live inside of me or literally on me.

Sometimes I still wonder if anyone of my family thinks I killed Sutton. The only one that seemed like she trusted me deeply was Laurel or at least in my face, she newer asked me if I murdered her sister. She was my rock and sometimes I even think she wasn't behaving as my sister but as my aunt and protecting me like I was some fragile baby. I was happy she was there and I love her so much. She is my best friend and a true sister at the same time.

For Suttons first memorial that happened on 1. Year anniversary since her death we had party that Sutton would be proud of. It was very adult like party without true laughter but without tears at the same time. For me it was very emotional because it opened so much wounds, that I was trying to forget so badly. I was happy that before that moment or well a day before I hadn't think of Ethan and my sister that much anymore and tried to live my life.

Returning to a day before memorial I remember gazing through the window thinking about my sister and looking at the stars. I always knew there were Mom Star, Dad Star and Emma Star. I changed it a bit and decided the Mom and Dad deserved the place of my Grandparents, who I tried to call my mom and dad, although at the time I wasn't comfortable doing that. But I am looking forward to the day I have kids and then I think I will start calling them openly Gramma and Grampa… Sometimes I would imagine Sutton being here with me and that they would adopt me the day that they adopted Sutton. I can't imagine how my life would be, how would it all turned out, would Ethan still kill Sutton or both of us or just me.

Then the doors opened and Laurel interrupted my thoughts rushed to the Suttons closet and returned with the outfit I wore for Suttons 18 birthday party and said: "Emma, get dressed! We are going to have a sleepover! Our friends want to be with us today". I remembered than that finally all of the girls returned from collages to be on Suttons memorial day and I was excited because I really needed right now some distraction from reality. I gave Laurel questionable look to why the hell I needed this dress, but she was so serious I didn't have the power to argue with her. She grabbed Suttons prepared sleepover bag that I also inherited and she forced me to wear the most amazing Sutton like high heels that I wore just because I knew she will be really heartbroken the next day. I felt guilty that it was my fault that Mercers and everyone else Sutton knew hadn't had chance to say goodbye to her sooner. She rot in the open and wild animals… I can't even think of how horrible it was for her to not be buried properly and for everyone else that truly knew her to live on for 5 months not knowing, that I who impersonated her wasn't actually her and she was death.

We were sitting in Laurels car being silent. It was getting dark and I started to remember what happened 1 year ago. Technically I was at my foster family as safe I could be but Sutton was definitely not safe. The timeline of her death was around 9 pm and when we drove from the house it was 7 pm. Technically she died that night, but because it happened overnight and she did live the most of the day, my parents chose the day after her official date of death for the memorial. That was the day when I came to them and the day represented as a metaphor that at the same time they lost one daughter and gained another. They wanted to remember the D day as something good because Sutton found out about me and met our mother Becky and we didn't want to ruin that and figured that the actual torture happened the day murderer started torturing me and it was the day her body went cold.

We soon arrived at the Madelines house and went in. There were candles everywhere burning and it was so beautiful. In the living room it was all set up as some kind of throne for the king. I didn't notice it before but Laurel was wearing white gown and everyone else in the room was wearing simple white clothes. There were Thayer, Madeline, Twitter twins and Charlotte sitting at the floor. I was happy to see them and especially Charlotte and Madeline, I think that Suttons death broth them closer together and were with no doubt the best friends. They both went together on the same collage at Brown. Sometimes I think that they went on purpose so far away from Sutton or me. It was hard for everyone and I think some of them saw me as Sutton and they certainly knew I can act like her because I was her for 5 months. Others looked at me and felt sad knowing that I'm not her and I was constant reminder of her, how she would look if she was still here and the same time I was changing so I didn't look like her as they last remember her.

Madeline and Charlotte looked up and smiled at me standing up from the ground and they walk toward me like goddesses or brides in all white. Madeline took my hand and she gently took me to her room and I didn't say anything. She gestured that I seat at her chair at the make up table and in the mirror I saw Charlotte taking curling wand and started doing my hair and Madeline did my make up. Than Laurel came and did my nails. I didn't know what to think but I felt like some kind of a queen. And then I understood they wanted for me to be Sutton. They finished and left the room and I came behind them. They were all on the floor in the pose I supposed slaves were when kneeling to their master. Thayer looked up to me with sadness in his eyes and at the same time he wore that sexy smirk that I was trying to ignore. I stood there for a second and saw at the chair the Crown and a paper. I god the chills up my spine because it remembered me at the time I got the same kind of notes from Ethan – the murderer and stalker of my sister. I gracefully walked to the crown not saying anything and put it on my head like a royal would do.