Just a quick note before I let you people read the fanfic:
(I'm sorry, really sorry! I was overseas and I couldn't post any fanfics in the web so yeah. I hope you will enjoy a fanfic from me. But beware, swear words and gore language in fanfic.)
Sherlock was typing on his computer, and John is away to check on his pregnant wife, Mary Watson. Sherlock asked for a cup of black coffee and two sugars from Janine, his new girlfriend. Janine got the coffee and passed it to Sherlock. Janine sits next to Sherlock and had a long smooch (kiss) and Sherlock hugged Janine.
Sherlock drank the coffee and he headed to the bedroom and Janine jumped on to Sherlock's bed. Sherlock removed the buttons on his shirt and Janine removed hers. They both started kissing and took of each other's shorts. John returned home without a sound and saw Sherlock sleeping with Janine on his chest naked. John was shocked of what he found and decided to wake Sherlock up.
"Hey John.. What's up!" Sherlock whispered to John. "What the hell are you doing with Janine!" John said loudly. "SHH! She's having sex with me." Sherlock whispered. "Okay Okay.. But you can't be serious… I thought you didn't love girls?" John whispered back. "I now love Janine. Because I envy you from loving Mary and marrying her. So I decided to go on an relationship." Sherlock whispered sadly.
"Oh Sherlock. I am going to get you some Vaseline cream and you can do whatever you want." John heads to his bathroom and took out a bottle of vaseline and gave it to Sherlock. Sherlock used it on his bare legs and snuggled with Janine and they slept again.
John headed to his room upstairs and sobbed quietly. He shouldn't have married Mary. But even though Sherlock has a new girlfriend, that doesn't mean that Sherlock will marry Janine. So John smiles and went to bed.
**The next morning..**
"Goodbye Janine. I'm going to work." "Goodbye Sweetheart." Janine winked and Sherlock walked to John's room and woke John up. "Good morning John." "Good Morning Sherlock. How's your sex?" John asked with joy. "Pretty good. We didn't do too much of an disgusting stuff." Sherlock smiled. "That's good. No wonder you used vaseline." John smiled as there will be another chance for him to marry Sherlock as long if John divorces Mary and Sherlock breaks up with Janine.
John and Sherlock headed to Mary's apartment, when Tiffany, Mary's roommate called John and said Mary was dead in the bathroom. Sherlock examined Mary's body and found out that Mary died from constipation. John grinned to himself and Sherlock winked.
They headed out to catch a breather, they told Tiffany to look after Mary and after a while when they outside. Sherlock touched John's neck and John brings himself closer. And soon they kissed each other lips. (Oh god, Gay scene. Beware of Sexual scenes coming!)
"Aw dang. John you fucking gay." Sherlock said with a wink. "That doesn't make us gay. Let's head back and go sex." John said with a smile. "What about Janine? Isn't she gonna say anything about us?" Sherlock asked. "You shall call her to go home a bit later because you'll not be home at 8pm." John said with a dirty look.
Soon they reached 221B. They sneaked into the bathroom without telling Mrs Hudson and started stripping clothes.. (It's coming.)
Sherlock touched John's body slowly.. And John touches Sherlock's.. They kissed each other with a big grin.. (Oh no! What is happening?)
Suddenly, Mrs Hudson knocks the bathroom door. She was holding her groin because she drank too much cranberry juice and she is very urgent. "Is there anyone there?" "Um yes, Mrs Hudson! I'm having diarrhoea! *makes fart sounds*" John faked his diarrhoea. Mrs Hudson couldn't wait any longer and so.. She pissed her pants.
Mrs Hudson left and headed to her room. She changed a pair of undies and a pair of pants and headed outside to go get groceries. Sherlock continued the kissing and the touching, not expecting Janine to be back so fast.
"Hey Sherlock you back yet? I was wondering if you want to eat dinner with me." Janine asked. "Um Janine, I'm in the middle of pooping. Can you wait for me upstairs at our room?" Sherlock said in a grumpy voice. "Sure Sherlock. Try to be faster because I need to change my clothes and use the bathroom." Janine said while smiling, and headed up to Sherlock's bathroom.
"What are we gonna do, John..?" Sherlock whispered. "You go to that dinner, and I will be sleeping at home. When you're back, give her this injection. Tell her it is a 100% baby chance injection." John whispered. "But what is this injection anyways?" "Anaesthesia. Makes her sleep for forever. Only a kiss can wake her up." John winked. Sherlock and John wore their clothes and John went to his room and sleep and Sherlock kept the anaesthesia in his pocket. Sherlock went to Janine and his room and held her hands and they headed to a restaurant nearby.
After they ate, Sherlock handed the anaesthesia pill and explained. "This is birth chance 100% pill Eat it, and you will be pregnant in a week, Darling." Janine ate it, and she fell into a deep sleep.
Janine was sent into a hospital and Sherlock headed home. John saw Sherlock grinning and they hugged each other. Slowly, their lips touched together. And now.. They hugged each other and kissed each other. (What's happening next to John and Sherlock?)
Sherlock heard the bedroom door creak. Mrs Hudson slowly entered and Sherlock and John hid in a wardrobe. Mrs Hudson looked shocked and asked, "Sherlock and John? Are you home?" Sherlock was cramped and found himself kissing John's lips despite the lack of space. Then suddenly… (OH NO… .)
Mrs Hudson saw Sherlock fell down the wardrobe and John fell down and kissed the lips of Sherlock. "what the hell are you two doing, Sherlock and John! Don't be fucking gay!" Sherlock stared at Mrs Hudson but the smooch won't stop Sherlock from leaving John! Soon Mrs Hudson dragged two lovers heads away from kissing mode. (Johnlocked getting owned! What are they going to do?)
"You two, you better explain why did you did kiss in the wardrobe, Huh?" Mrs Hudson asked. "Um.. we just got an hunch." John said nervously, rubbing his hands. "Then why are you guys so hideous?" "I don't know.. Mrs Hudson." Sherlock shuddered. Mrs Hudson raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure? Where's Mary and Janine?" "Well um, John got divorced, and I broke up with Janine." Sherlock said swiftly, scratching his head.
Mrs Hudson sighed, then left the room. John and Sherlock continued the kissing and they were totally hooked of kissing each other. Just when suddenly.. (What, a character coming back?)
Janine storms into the room, shocked to see Sherlock kissing John. "Sherlock Holmes! What the fuck are you doing?!" "Janine… I.. um.." Sherlock uttered. "What birth chance pills, what kissing John. All this are utterly nonsense! For god's sake!" Janine shouted. "No.. Janine.. I can explain, please.." "Let's break up! I don't care anymore! Because for the fuck's sake you don't care about me!" Janine cried and screamed at the top of her lungs, slamming the door behind her after she said to Sherlock.
Sherlock started crying a little, and John pats on his back. On the same time, after a few seconds, John started crying as well. Sherlock hugged John tightly and they cried on each other shoulders. They had a long sweet time.
(Sorry guys this was bit weird and johnlockish. But hope you guys out there will enjoy it!)