Story: Caveman meets Fury, and it's not pleasant. Loki needs to take care of something. Sequel to "Considerate"
Author's note: Another pointless 3-hour meeting. Some people just like to hear themselves talk, while wasting the time of 30 other people who have to listen. It made me want to punch someone.
Disclaimer: The usual. I don't own anything Marvel.
Indignant
He is pretty sure that he just broke his hand on Nick Fury's jaw, and depending on whether he managed to break the other man's jaw or not he'll be glad that he punched the guy while he is trying not to think about the fact that normally he is not the one who resorts to violence outside of his armored suit.
His day-to-day dealing with other people normally involves his sharp tongue, his wit, his ability to insult others in a way that they only realize it hours or even days later, and no fists connecting with faces.
They are here because Loki dared to skip the last assault on the city, and while it's ok for Cap to just disappear mysteriously for months only to bring back killer-robots, while the spy-kids sit out battles every now and then because of being out of town for some recon, the Demigod(des) obviously is not allowed to have a bad day, even when Tony promised that they're going to explain it once he and Thor took care of the Doombots crawling around in lower Manhattan.
It was a piece of cake, anyway. Those things still short-circuit when confronted with Thunderpants' kind of high-voltage electricity, Doom obviously has not found the right insulation yet, and Tony's even prouder how MARK VI performed when they met for the first time.
Already the way how Fury greets them when they enter his office has Tony's blood pressure rise, though. He's looking Loki up and down with a face as if they just dragged in some roadkill, and then states: "Don't think that this'll have a different ending just because he's coming here in Drag."
That's when Tony wants to punch him for the first time, but rather grabs his wife's hand, squeezing it slightly. They've had this discussion multiple times, yet there's still some narrow-minded people who just won't get the concept that Loki is not just disguised as a woman. She is shrugging it off, most of the time, and Tony learned to do that, too.
Their explanation why Loki did not join in, and will be sitting out any other fight for at least the next seven months gets them a growl, and then almost a laughing fit. Almost, because really, Tony's not even sure whether Fury knows how to laugh.
"Pull your immature pranks on your SI employees, Stark. Though, I guess, Potts by now sees through everything and does not believe any of your bullshit."
Tony snorts at that. Pepper and Loki have bonded a long time ago, even before the Goddess appeared, over a mutual need to yell at him when he does something reckless, which just makes him feel loved even more, and a mutual interest in shoes.
Seriously, Loki is probably the guy with the biggest shoe collection on Earth, and it only got worse when the Goddess figured out online shopping.
Tony just smiled and built a walk-in closet for Loki's shoes and is happy that his God/Goddess has found another friend he OR she could trust in.
It has been Pepper who calmed down a scared and confused Loki that could not change back to her male ego and was not sure at all how her mortal would react to the news.
It was Pepper whom Loki had trusted enough to ask for a doctor to check if everything was alright before J.A.R.V.I.S. even thought about telling Tony that something might be wrong with Miss Loki.
It was Pepper who came along to their latest appointment, ending up just as teary-eyed as Loki and Tony when they made out that racing heartbeat, those tiny arms and feet, and fingers and toes, and she's been calling dibs on being the Godmother almost instantly.
Fury should know by the look Tony is sending him by now that this is not a joke.
He should make the wise decision to accept the pictures that Tony pulls out of his wallet like the proud father-to-be he is as what they are: a proof that there's indeed a little blueberry.
He should congratulate them, or keep his mouth shut.
He doesn't.
"So he's framed you pretty well, huh, Stark. Well, if you wanna share the rest of your fricking life with the enemy and whatever thing he is breeding in there, I won't stop you. Just don't come running when he decides to off…"
That's when Tony loses it and the caveman takes over. Nobody calls his wife the enemy (or a he) after all she's done to redeem herself, and nobody his calling his blueberry a thing!
He is still flexing his hand, trying to figure out if he needs a cast, or if an ice pack will suffice when he hears her sob.
When he turns around it's pretty clear that these are no Loki turns the waterworks on because it might get her what she wants tears. No. These are real. And they are not the cute kind of I don't know why this diaper commercial makes me cry, Anthony, it just does hormonal tears that made their appearance a few days ago.
It makes Tony wanna punch Fury once more, but he rather turns, ignores his throbbing hand and gathers his upset wife in an embrace. When he turns both of them to leave the office, he throws the other man a seething look. At least Fury's bleeding from his nose, still holding his chin. That must be made of granite, though. At least his hand feels like that.
Thor spots them the moment they leave the office, and as the good big brother he is, he instantly assumes that it's Tony who made his baby sister cry.
Loki is fast enough to correct this assumption, before Tony ends up as a smear on the wall, and she lets the name Fury drop just subtly enough that Tony's sure that the Thunderer will pay the other man a rather unpleasant visit. And probably win the fight against the granite jaw.
Loki sends him off into the communal kitchen, then, stating that his hand is not broken and just needs some ice, and obviously Tony's getting better with people hinting stuff, because he totally gets that she wants to talk to her brother alone, maybe tell him the big news before they let the others know.
He still keeps an eye on her when she shows Thor her wedding band, and he can tell that the big guy is actually hurt that he was not invited. Loki lowers her head then, not looking at her brother, still holding his hands, though, when she tells him the even bigger news, and Tony briefly wonders how much damage it would do to his hand if he has to sock the other God. He will, if the Thunderer makes Loki cry.
To his surprise, Thor's face softens immediately, and Tony's quite sure he's never seen the big guy so gentle when one of his hands lets go off Loki's and comes to rest against her belly. And, actually, now it's Tony who is close to tears.
They talk some more, but now that Tony's sure that Thor is on their side, he goes to hunt down this ice pack because, fuck, his hand is hurting.
Thor misses the debriefing, certainly not caring that Fury is furious. Having the option to call that Heimdall dude and just go all beam me up, Scotty has its advantages.
Fury sent two Quinjets after Tony the last time he decided that he'd enough of one of their let's talk everything we did today to death meetings.
Well, they learned the hard way that you rather let an annoyed Tony Stark keep his cellphone when you make him sit through a meeting he doesn't want to attend, because when he's playing with his phone he is less prone to add very qualified, sarcastic comments to almost everything, or makes his confiscated cellphone go boom with his substitute phone.
Clint hands over ten bucks to Bruce when they break the news to them. Those two are the only ones that congratulate. Bruce is the only one who offers help.
Nat… looks like always, that can be good or bad, but Tony's too busy by then with showing his ultrasound pictures to the other guys to care. He's doing it with the hand that is still wrapped with the icepack, because Loki's not letting go of his other one.
Fury is nursing a black and blue jaw, some cotton shoved up his nose, and somehow it makes his black and blue knuckles worthwhile.
Needless to say the debriefing ends without debriefing anything.
Thor comes back when they are already done, and is on the receiving end of one of the rare Loki-initiated hugs when Tony marches back into the communal kitchen to get rid of the ice pack.
Loki is still brooding afterwards, and Tony hates how this day has affected his happy Goddess who was already online shopping for maternity dresses and, because she was already at it, some more shoes.
He decides to give her some time, some space, to sort her thoughts and sits down in the living room because he does not feel like tinkering in the lab right now.
He has not even grabbed the remote control when she sits down on his lap, her head burying against the crook of his neck, her nose nuzzling his throat and his plan to watch some TV is abandoned for the plan to hug his wife until she's happy again.
"You are not an enemy, Lokes", he says, but Loki only shifts closer.
"And our blueberry is just that, our little blueberry. Even though he or he is rather prune-sized by now."
He hears her chuckle against his neck, but when she lifts her head to face him, she still looks sad, somehow. She softly kisses him before shifting lower on his lap, resting her head against his chest.
"I know that, Anthony. Being called names does not rile me anymore, and they will have to face our blueberry for calling her or him a thing."
"What riled you then?" he asks, grinning at her when her eyes turn upwards in mock exasperation for his wording.
He can see that she wants to tell him something and does not really know how to approach the matter. It's not the calling names, and the only other thing Fury said…
"Just say it, Lokes! What's wrong? Does spending the rest of our lives together sound so bad to you?"
Ah, he's hit the nail on the head, because the tears are reappearing.
"No", she whispers then. "No, it does sound like everything I ever wanted. But I realized today that the rest of your life will be much shorter than the rest of mine."
All he can do after that confession is close his arms even harder around her, softly kissing her hair.
"I'm not dead yet, Lokes." He'll figure something out. He always does.
She's shifting again, sitting up a bit straighter, one hand reaching up to caress his cheek.
"And you will not be for a very long time if you agree…"
He's confused, and frowns at her. Agrees to what?
And then he witnesses a golden apple appearing in her other hand.