Procyon Lotor: Translation: Genius Washer. The Latin name for the animal known as nature's masked thieves in the modern day and in the urban dictionary, the cutest animal on the planet!

Yep. This is exactly what you guys think if you've looked through Felis Lombaxus for the past year. Have fun with my Pre-One Year Collection of One Shots!

And for those of you who have no idea what this is mostly going to be, Sly Cooper, acting like a real life raccoon.

Disclaimer: I do not own Sly Cooper nor do I own the possible time you would all lose from passing out with laughter of the following entries.

Digging Through Trash

Crash!

"Wuzza!?" Bentley poked his head out of his shell as he heard something digging through the trash outside for whatever they could scavenge. The turtle gave a small sigh as he rubbed his eyes and slipped his glasses on and got into his wheel chair beside his bed.

Clink... clink clank...

"I swear if that's just another rat digging through the trash..." Bentley mumbled before he entered the living room to see Murray also waling to the alley facing door with just his sleeping clothes on.

"That woke you up too?" A silent nod came from the hippo as he snatched a hammer from the hidden pocket in the wall just before he opened the door and quickly and quietly stepped outside. Bentley thought that Murray was going to throw the hammer at the trashcan, but the hippo simply lowered his arm and gave a stumped look at whatever was digging through their trash.

"What?" Bentley poked his head out the door to see the one thing he thought he's never see.

"You have got to be kidding me." Sly was the one digging through their trash. Sly! Freaking Sly, their best friend was pawing through their trash like some... Raccoon! And he is a raccoon! And he's never done this before! Bentley face palmed and sighed as Murray simply watched Sly come out of the trash with a half eaten baguette and start knawing on the bread.

Squeaking from Fear

"Hey! I found the runt!" Clockwerk scowled at Muggshot as the bulldog held the young Cooper by the scruff of his neck, resulting in the young raccoon squeaking over and over with tears streaming down his face.

"Leave him alone."

"But, Clockwerk. This little rat is the key to continuing the Cooper li-"

"LEAVE HIM BE!" The metal owl screeched as Sir Raleigh tried to convince the ancient owl to kill the child.

"I'll come after you!"

"Oh? And who will save you when you have no ability to get out of my grip? Face it Cooper... You are destined to die in my talons... But not tonight." And without a word, Muggshot dropped the young child down on the floor and the Fiendish Five left the Cooper farm with their pages of the old book and disappeared into the night..

"DAD! SOMEBODY! HELP! PLEASE!"

Mostly Nocturnal

"Sly! Wake up!" Murray gave a small sigh as Sly simply groaned and turned his back to the hippo.

"Raccoons are nocturnal."

"Like that excuse is going to work." Bentley grinned as he wound up a alarm clock and placed it next to the raccoon's ear. Murray didn't even start laughing at Sly's bristled fur before Sly became a complete blur of snatching the clock from Bentley's hand to smashing it against the wall and falling back to sleep.

"We'll go at it again at three p.m."

"Are you sure we shouldn't just let him sleep until six?"

"Ugh."

Trapped

Click!

"Oh, crap." Sly gave a short yelp out as several metal bars shot out of the ground around him and left no room for any escape. The raccoon growled as he hit the bars with his cane a few times until the vibrating got to his limit of which he simply dropped his cane and started hitting the bars with his hands, feet, and his entire body a few times. After a possible hour of banging on the bars, Sly groaned as he sat down and let his defeat sink in.

"Hold on, Sly! I'm gonna get you out of there!" Sly gave a small smile as Murray stated his rescue through his Binocucom. At least something is going alright today.

Purring

"Is Sly purring?" Penelope giggled as Bentley carefully cleaned the blinding dust out of the mouse's eyes.

"Being blind must've increased your hearing levels. And, yeah. He does that when he's comfortable." Bentley chuckled as he looked over to see the said raccoon curled up asleep on the couch. The turtle simply shook his head as he got the last of the dust out of the mouse's eyes and carefully slipped her glasses on to let her see clearly again.

"Thank you, Bentley."

"Y- You're welcome."

*Sniffles* Why did Sanzaru break those two up? They were so cute together.,,

Okay. I'm good. And yes, you can request for any propts and they don't have to be real life raccoon related, but there are these rules.

Rule 1: Content has to be at K plus.

Rule 2: 2 requests per user, even you guests!

So... ... yeah. See you guys next time.

~Jak Cooper the Lombax