Mikau: So, the writing prompt was "pragmatic, like a colony of wolves", and this is what I came up with. I originally thought it was too short to publish, but what the heck. Enjoy.
Disclaimer: If I owned it, the series would be a lot less serious. More light-hearted and…well…silly.
…
Pragmatic, Like a Colony of Wolves
That was exactly how Kaito would describe the pack of detectives he was surrounded by—pragmatic, like a colony of wolves.
Kaito had won a lame prize drawing—a mystery tour weekend—and Aoko had "gotten sick" at the last minute, so she had given her ticket to one Hakuba f-ing Saguru.
To further compound Kaito's streak of bad luck, it appeared Hattori Heiji had won a similar drawing. To make matters worse, Hattori had brought along "Edogawa Conan" as his guest.
And of course there had been a murder because Edogawa f-ing Conan couldn't go anywhere without his shinigami powers leaving dead bodies in his wake.
So now the tour guide was lying dead in the middle of the aisle of the bus, and all of the mystery nerds were trying to figure out how the guide had been killed in front of a bus full of witnesses without anyone noticing anything strange.
Tantei-kun was on the scent of the killer, sniffing around the body like a bloodhound and making notes of all the clues no one else could see.
The Osakan detective and the Brit seemed to be having a bit of a tiff, and some teenage girl that kind of looked like a fairly attractive "cool guy" was discretely making note of Conan's actions.
Kaito didn't dare draw attention to himself. With so many detectives and nowhere to run in the cramped bus (Well, if he were being honest, Kaito could probably pull off a backflip or two fairly easily, but…), he thought it better just to sit still and let the colony of wolves do their thing.
Eventually Hakuba narrowed in on the driver of the bus, and he and the rest of the teen detective squad preformed an, actually, pretty spectacular and fairly flashy deduction show.
There was much applause.
Again, if Kaito were being honest, it was kind of cool. They needed to form a five man team, like the Power Rangers or something. Tantei-kun would be red, Hakuba green, Hattori blue, and the detective girl would be yellow. Only they needed a fifth member. And Kaito was NOT going to be pink. No. No, no, no. No. Okay, maybe, but still.
"That was kind of impressive how you noticed the setup with the turn signal," Kaito muttered under his breath, trying not to sound too impressed, as Hakuba returned to his seat.
"Thank you, Kuroba." The detective smiled bashfully, tucking a stray strand of hair behind his ear.
What had happened to the arrogant prick that had showed up in February the previous year?
The next day, the group set out again, and they got about an hour into the tour before yet another body hit the floor.
The detective squad was on the case, cordoning off the crime scene and snooping for clues before the body had even had the chance to go cold.
Kaito sighed, vowing never to go on another mystery tour as long as he lived. If he did, it just might be the literal death of him.
…
AA
\'.'/
Mikau: (It's supposed to be a wolf. Maybe.) Tada! That's all folks. What did you think? Did it at least get a chuckle out of you? Feedback would be appreciated since I'm kind of nervous about this one. It's just kind of…a little crack one-shot. I'm really interested in what you think. Do you guys like short, not so serious stories like that? Please let me know. If you do, I've got more I could publish. Anyway, thank you so much for taking the time to read it. Have a great day, and take care!