Name: Rejection Hurts As Much As Love
Spoilers: Girl In The Fireplace, School Reunion slightly Doctor Dances but that's just a sentence.
Summar: Rose is hurting after The Girl In The Fireplace. Afterwards she confronts the Doctor and she's not sure she likes the answer he gives her.
Author: MyLonelyAngel (Seth)
Rating: T
A worried male voice cut through the air, reminding the young Rose Tyler that she wasn't on her own. Even though it felt like it. The pain in her chest made it feel like someone had brutally ripped her heart, without remorse. And that was exactly what he had done. He'd left her. In some space ship. In the 51st century.
"What happened?"
Rose was standing, perfectly still.
"Where did the time window go?"
Just standing watching the place where the mirror had been.
"How's he gonna get back?"
It looked exactly the same. Only now it was broken and totally useless.
Rose didn't say a thing at all. Not even as she heard the pitch in Mickey's voice go up.
It was a bastard. An A class bastard. He didn't even think about them. Just left her and her ex on a space ship with nothing. It wasn't like they were expert TARDIS flyers. They couldn't exactly pilot the complicated machine home to safety. Even if they could home wouldn't be home. Home probably never would be home.
She blinked back the tears. And that alien git just left them her. Ran off to be with his French tart. She knew that when she met Sarah-Jane that the Doctor had others in his life but she didn't think that he was slowly adding to the list. How pathetic did she look right now? She wondered.
Sarah-Jane Smith. Cleopatra. Even fucking Madame de Pompadour.
But never her... God, you'd have thought that he didn't see the desire filled looks she gave him.
Maybe to get the attention of the Doctor you had to be educated, elegant, well-dressed, confidently sexy and just so happen to be the mistress to the French King.
Well, let's just assess this insane little checklist, 'ey? A voice in her head piped up.
Educated. Well, she failed that one miserably. No A levels.
Elegant. Now that one depended on the way you looked at it, Rose supposed. Her accent was not in the least elegant. Having been born and raised in London had certainly taken its toll. But at times (in the right clothes and lighting, Jackie always joked) Rose had a certain hiding elegance. Not that she had much time to show it. What with all the running for their lives.
Well-dressed. Jeans and a tight t-shirt hardly matched long flowing dresses and corsets.
Confidently sexy. Not around the Doctor at any rate. Although... there had been that thing when they had been in the London Hospital during the Blitz. When she'd been waiting for Jack to save them and he'd been moaning. Men, so typical. They'd talked about dancing and she had been kinda... innocent. And of course terribly sexy.
Mistress to the French King. Hah! Right, just like she was Queen of Spain's cousin twice removed. The only sexual contact she'd had, had been with Mickey. Or Jimmy Stone. Or that nice bloke from the pub who'd forgotten for the night that he was married.
But then she'd found the Doctor. And he wasn't just any bloke. He was the bloke. She thought she loved him. Hell she did love him. Alien bastard. Just because she was a stupid ape didn't mean that she didn't have feelings too. There was no need to treat her like dirt.
In fact she'd probably seen him treat dirt better. That made her let out a small laugh, which she tried to stop from escaping her mouth, the image of him patting the ground lovingly. But her laughs quickly turned to sobs. Loud racking sobs that tore through her chest and made Mickey pull her into a worried, and rather useless, bear hug.
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Rose walked in the console room, watched as he placed the letter in his jacket pocket. Tears unshed threatening to fall. But she knew that he wouldn't cry. He didn't stay around to clear up, didn't do domestic
and most certainly didn't cry. She watched as he flicked a switch and pushed a button and the TARDIS started up. It wasn't until all was silent again that she finally spoke up. Her voice shattering the silence.
"Reinette was nice." Her words shocked even herself. Did she just call the French tart nice? Well from the look on the Doctor's face the answer was obviously yes.
"Well, I mean she was good. No obvious evilness." Oh, yeah. That really made sense. And the Doctor still hadn't said anything. Well, might as well go for the kill while he's not blathering on.
"Does this happen all the time?"
Rose was staring intently at the grill grating on the TARDIS' floor. If she didn't look at the Doctor then she wouldn't have to see his warm brown eyes. And if she didn't see his warm brown eyes then her bottom lip wouldn't quiver. And if that didn't happen then she wouldn't randomly burst into tears.
And that would be a real help right now.
"Does what happen all the time?" The Doctor asked quietly. And there it was. His armour back up. Not letting anyone in. Good, it shouldn't hurt when she slapped him back into reality.
Rose decided to leave his question for the moment. Going for a different tactic.
"How many companions have you really travelled with? One? Two? I mean there would 'ave had to be a few, so... how many?" She finally looked up at him, her eyes blazing with anger at how he could just forget about her and Mickey. "Is it like shopping with you? Pick one off of the shelf and if you happen to lose or break it just pick out a new one?"
"Rose..." He warned her.
"Rose what? 'Rose I'm the last of the Time Lords so I can play with people's feelings'? 'Rose you're acting like a stupid ape'?" She practically spat this at him. Not even blinking when he took a step forward. His face stony and cold.
"Human's die, Rose," The Doctor shouted. Rose just stood there, the look of shock evident on her face. The Doctor never shouted. Well not this new Doctor and not at her. He was obviously slightly shocked as well, as he decided to take a different tone of voice.
"You die. I'd give anything to be human. I'd give anything to be like you and Mickey. Able to have a nine 'til five job, small house in the city. Complain about the price of petrol but I can't have that kind of life."
He was so close now, within touching distant. His hand resting on her arm, trying to comfort her.
And for the second time that day Rose burst into tears.
And for the second time that day her heart broke as he pulled her to him, embracing in yet another hug.
But this time from a different man. This time from a whole different species at all. And the main difference was... she loved this man. Sure, she loved Mickey. But she wasn't in love with him. The Doctor was her best friend, and the man she was in love with all rolled in to one.
Rose let out a strangled sob, half wanting to push the Time Lord away, half wanting to never let go.
The Doctor stroked her hair softly, muttering promises into her ear.
"Hey now, come on. Don't cry." He wrapped his arms around her tighter. After losing Reinette he couldn't stand losing Rose. He couldn't stand losing fighting with Rose. His Rose.
They stayed like that for a while, totally absorbed in each other. Until Rose pulled away, murmuring something about having to show Mickey around. But her tone was much more cheerful. Whether it was forced was unknown. The Doctor reluctantly let go, faked a smile and turned back to the TARDIS console.
The tear rolling down his face unseen by the woman he loved the most, leaving a lone streak down his face.