Walang Kapalit
[Irreplaceable
By: Anonymous
Story Summary: Honda Tohru. A character who helped people out of selflessness and expected nothing in return. Despite the many good deeds she has committed, she still wasn't able to attain something she desires. Shall her desires be known[HisLove Previously named "I need you back; I need you here to guide me"
Author's Note: I hold an irresistible distaste for conniving fools like her. She was someone that had everything I wanted. [Standard Disclaimer Applies
Chapter 1: I can't go on forever
A woman about twenty-years-old walked down the busy streets of Tokyo, Japan (Author's Note; I forgot wherever they where living at this point. It's been a long time since I've read Furuba, I'll try my best to write it the best way I can.) Her dirt-coloured brown eyes wielded a vacant and empty stare, something quite unordinary for this particular woman.
Because, this woman was Tohru Honda, a cheery woman born into a life of poverty and grew into a skin without parents there to guide her into the start of her life. Despite what Fate has chosen for her new path, Tohru remained optimistic and happy throughout every situation in her life. It was a dull world for her to live in such a life of disarray and hate for everything that has taken her life away from her. From the time her mother was taken away from her, she knew that the path she had to take was one that she had to carve for herself.
Although, she was too young to understand how to "carve" her life in, she was fortunate enough to have people accompany her and help her fit in her skin of living. Alas, they weren't supposed to stay like that forever, Tohru's friends were friends and they also had a life of their own. Slowly, one by one, they released Tohru's hold on them, not knowing that their own desires caused them to leave the girl that they had cherished and promised to keep on cherishing from a young age.
While, Tohru was left all on her own to pick up her own self, the finishing blows to break her forlorn mirror were the worst out of all of them. Kyo Sohma and Yuki Sohma, the two that had unknowingly treasured them the most had acquired themselves someone else to love, someone else to care for.
Kagura, a cousin of their's had truly touched Kyo's broken heart, making him realize in the process that he truly loved her and that every moment he wasn't living alongside of her, he was wasting every moment by. Kagura and Kyo's relationship was one of the most surprising things to happen, knowing that Kyo never wanted to be with her at all in the past. But the past is the past, right? They truly loved each other and that's what mattered the most.
It was hurtful though; Tohru had grown quite fond of this carrot-topped cat. Even much more that she realized that she carried feelings for him, but it wasn't something that she was going to fret about. He was happy and Kagura was happy, two friends she made that helped to take care of her when she needed them the most.
Now, Yuki Sohma, the prince that repeatedly saved her for the sake of his own feelings for her. Alas, Tohru never realized his deepest feelings for her and mistook if for mere kindness out of his own heart. A bit discouraged by her view on him, Yuki had decided to longer pursue her, thinking that he mistook his feelings for her and thought it was only a motherly love. To prove himself that he was mistaken, Machi replaced Tohru's love in his heart.
It devastated Tohru to realize her true feelings for Yuki, unlike her relationship with Kyo; she realized that she was far more in love with Yuki.
"Ne-No! I can't be selfish at a time like this. How can I think such thoughts when they're happy the way they are right now?" Tohru mumbled under her breath, shaking her head vigorously. She paused; stopping in the middle of the sidewalk, people bumping into her. She sniffled slightly and rubbed her eyes; there were no tears present.
She knew from the bottom of her heart that she couldn't accept that fact of nature no matter how hard she tried. She was simply too emotionally attached to Yuki and Kyo that she couldn't just forget him altogether. She loved them both, it didn't matter that the love she shared for them both was different, but it was just simply a matter of not getting used to. In the past, Tohru had anticipated that she would lose one of them, but she never acknowledged the fact that she might lose both of them.
"I-I can't! I won't! I won't continue living like this anymore! I have to be happy for the both of them even if it hurts here in this small chest of mine! I have to persevere! Keep on going this race! Someone out there's just waiting for me and I can't be acting like this!" Tohru exclaimed to no one in particular. Onlookers paused, whispering into their partner's ears, obviously gossiping about the chestnut-haired adult. Despite the amount of looks she was receiving, she remained oblivious to the whole thing.
"Yes! Once I find that special person, I'll share him with the world and…and…and.."
"Honda-san?" A pause. Tohru turned around, surprise and shock gracing her features once she realized who had spoken her name (particularly her last name)
Soft, silky gray lock flew into the air, the sweet smell of blueberries filling her nostrils. The stranger's big, bright violet orbs met her plain muddy brow gaze, the individual's gaze almost questioning and a bit surprised catching up with Tohru around this area. A small tranquil smile was in place on his pinkened lips, his flawless features brightening at the sight of Tohru.
"Yuki-kun?" Tohru questioned, her mood lifting up. She advanced towards him, only to be stopped by a piercing gaze sent by Machi. Tohru paused and stopped, a bit intimidated by that look. While Tohru remained mesmerized by the simple sight of Yuki, she never noticed the presence of Machi. Tohru gulped silently, feeling an aura of hatred surrounding her.
Machi remained by Yuki's side, clinging possessively and almost desperately on his arm. Her expression was dull and practically emotionless, but would it still remain emotionless if it was partially full of complete loathing? Machi was a woman of extraordinary features, even if it remained just a little plain and simple. Machi mirrored a few of Tohru's features, specifically the color of both her eyes and hair.
"Is everything alright? We saw you standing here and you were just staring up into the sky, is there something wrong?" Yuki questioned. Yuki's voice was better than silk and satin combined; his voice was just so smooth and soft, it was hard to even wonder if he was anything desiring more than the female species. He was just too good to be true to even hope that he would spare a single glance at women.
"Of course!" Tohru said enthusiastically, forcing a grin to add onto her reassurance. Yuki returned her grin, giving her a small smile of his own. Not wanting to be to seem completely rude to her boyfriend (or is it that she simply didn't want to be left out?) Machi smiled at Tohru as well, grimacing inwardly.
Machi could care less of Tohru was upset or on her damn deathbed being so damn optimistic and welcoming the Grim Reaper himself. Machi was an evil woman of twenty, almost transforming from her withdrawn shell to a conniving woman that could ruin anybody at a simple statement. Machi was a woman to be reckoned with, she had everything an ordinary woman could only dream of. Another thing that added her to be one of Japan's most envied woman, the additional fact that caused her to be numero uno was that her current boyfriend of one year was Sohma Yuki.
Machi cared about all of those factors that made her the woman she is now, but the thing that she strives to maintain the most is to be able to keep Yuki happy and not let anyone else come in between their little circle. Yet, Yuki desire not a woman of standards such as that. Oh no, he desired much more that the simple want of being happy. He wanted to feel happiness and he wanted someone to understand his position as a cursed being of the Sohma family.
The one plagued of the memory of being the first to condemn his family into this irritating curse.
Now, Machi was simply a girl more than a friend and closer like a sister. Though, deep into the bowls of Yuki's mind, the place where Yuki had buried everything concerning his feelings for Tohru, he knew that Machi could never surpass Tohru and replace her in this heart of his.
"Honda-san? Aren't you supposed to be arriving home at this hour? It's pretty late for you to be wandering," Yuki inquired, cocking up an eyebrow.
"Ehto? I was just heading for work. What makes you think that I would be heading for home?" Tohru questioned him; confused by the question he shot her.
"Honda-san, it's 10:50—." Tohru cut him off with an upset cry. It was that late?
"No! I couldn't have missed work! How could I have been wandering around the whole city without noticing that it was already late and how could I've missed work?!" Tohru asked, taking a few sharp breath intakes.
"Honda-san," Machi said sickeningly sweet, "I'm pretty sure that your boss would understand that you were out wandering the city with not a single interest of work on your mind."
"Please don't worry about it. I'm pretty sure that they closed early," Yuki said reassuringly, lifting his hands in front of him and motioning that it was okay. Tohru glanced at Yuki and released a small sigh.
"I guess missing one day of work is okay.. as long as.." Yuki glanced at Tohru, a bit surprised by her sudden change of attitude. First she was devastatingly upset and now..
"I WORK HARDER, DO EVERYTHING AT A FASTER PACE TOMORROW AND FINISH EVERYTHING THAT WAS ASSIGNED FOR ME TO DO THIS DAY (which would be yesterday if tomorrow was today)," Tohru exclaimed, clenching her fist and looking up at the sky once more.
Yuki chuckled slightly and slowly pulled away from Machi's deathly grip. He advanced towards Tohru and grasped her hands into his own, squeezing them slightly. Releasing one of her hands, he lifted her face with his free one. He stared right at her, his violet eyes piercing through her soul, she felt as if he could read her very mind and everything within her embodiment.
"Tohru," Yuki said, saying her first name for the very first time in years, "remember what your mother asked you to keep a promise to 'work on your own pace and no one else's'?"
"H-Hai," Tohru responded, her face turning to a deep shade of crimson. She felt…so BARE and so exposed when she was in this position.
Machi glared at them, the feeling of complete distaste fresh on her senses. Yuki Sohma was her boyfriend and she was his only interest in life itself. It displeased her greatly that every time she saw these two together; it seemed as if she was the third wheel, the one who constantly tags along, even though Yuki was her own boyfriend, not Tohrus'. It was jealousy that drove her to be the best that she could be in Yuki's eyes.
While Machi was busy glaring holes into Tohru, a passing couple made their way. The woman giggled, nudging her lover.
"Oh honey look!" she whispered to him, pulling his arm. She smiled at him and nodded over to where Yuki and Tohru resided.
"Don't they look adorable? It looks like they're having a grand time being with each other," she stated, snuggling closer to his arm. Machi snapped her attention towards the hovering couple, her chocolate-coloured orbs narrowing with every word they made.
"They look as if they were made for each other. Sweetheart, can you see it too?" he whispered back, his gaze captured by the two young adults as well.
"Do… do you think that's what we looked like when we were together when we were younger? I hope so, they look darn cute with their giggling," she commented, straying closer to Machi.
At that last statement, Machi couldn't stand it any longer, she was offended and terribly irritated by their chit-chat with her boyfriend and that treacherous demon.
"Pardon me for interrupting your…talk but that's my boyfriend and that girl is a simple nobody that desires nothing more than to ruin women like me by taking their lovers," Machi said icily, her brown eyes narrowing with complete distaste.
"Ah. Our apologies, we thought that they were together since they were obviously standing there giggling and not having a care in the world while you (the so-called girlfriend) remain here watching them while listening to us do some small-talk," the woman retorted her voice cool and composed. It was plain obvious though that her words were dripping with sarcasm and completely unapologetic.
The man pulled his woman away before Machi started a match that she could not finish as well as she started. The couple strayed farther away from Machi and the two giggling adults; their features grim and serious.
"Apparently that woman can't comprehend that he loves another, especially since the truth lies right in front of her," the woman stated silently, her eyes no longer filled with a certain type of glee and happiness as she did conversing with the male.
"It won't be long, it won't be long for the end to arrive."
"It'll be a shame, but whoever he decides to choose will determine what exactly would happen to them."
"Let's see how they would take care of this, maybe it'll be prove worthwhile in the end?"
Author's Note; Constructive Criticism (comma use, verb use, sentence structure, etc)