In The Sea Of Love
By Maddy
Summary: Today is a very special day
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Buffy season 7 and Angel seasons 3, 4 and 5
Timeline: Early 2006
Disclaimer: I own nothing, not a thing. Well, except clothes and stuff like that.
Distribution: If you have my permission to take any of my fic, you can have this one too. If not, just ask.
Feedback: Always wanted and always appreciated.
Author's Notes: Title from the Fleetwood Mac song 'Sara,' the lyrics at the end are also from that song, but I didn't use the whole song
Love.
It's a curse really, that's what I tell myself as I stand in front of the mirror. If I didn't love him, I wouldn't have suffered so much heartbreak or loneliness, but then there's a flip-side:(;) I wouldn't have felt such love or completeness either. It's both good and bad, you always want more, you can't always get who you love, and when you do, they might up and leave, thinking it's for your own good when you both know that a stupid – okay, off topic. See, it's a curse.
I take a deep breath and run my hands down my skirt, smoothing it out even though it didn't need it, but it gave my hands something to do. I've been real fidgety for the past hour, trying to keep my mind, off what was about to happen. It feels like I've been preparing for this all my life, but now that it's actually here, I can't seem to sit still. I'm driving Willow nuts. I laugh quietly to myself and tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. Yes, I am nervous and I don't have any real reason to be, but I can't help it, this is a big – huge – moment in my life, something that should only happen once during your life. So, of course I'm nervous. Okay, I've changed my mind, I'm not nervous, I'm waiting with great anticipation. Yeah, that sounds better. I bet he's nervous though.
I take a quick look at the clock hanging on the wall. 15 minutes left. Oh, god, what the hell am I going to do for 15 minutes? I sigh in frustration and slump down in one of those really comfy spring armchairs. Willow yells to stand up. That's right, I can't sit down till after. It seems like I've been standing all day. I obliged to my best friend's wishes and stood back up, again I smoothed out my skirt, this time my sister fixed up at the back where I couldn't reach. Dawn and Willow looked very beautiful today.
Both had their hair nicely done, beautiful dresses, nice shoes, but they always look beautiful. Dawn finished fixing the back of my skirt and came to stand in front of me with Willow standing next to her.
I suddenly reach foreword and pulled them both into a hug. They tightly hugged me back. I told them I was glad they were with me today. Dawn said she knew this day had been coming for years. Will just kept holding me. Dawn pulled back, but still Willow held onto me. I asked her what was wrong; it was then that she pulled back. She was crying. I asked her why she was crying. I'm just happy for you, was her reply.
There was a knock on the door, as Willow answered it, Giles stepped into the room. He was dressed very smartly and he didn't look nervous, just a bit flustered. He grinned like a madman when he saw me and I smiled back. Then I felt like throwing up, but not because it was Giles, but because – oh, forget it. He told me I was beautiful. I saw a gleam of tears in his eyes, I told him now wasn't the time to gush. When he said he was proud of me, all I could do was stare.
Giles: my father in every way that counts, my mentor, Watcher, Head of the Council and lifelong friend. I told him thank you, once my mouth began working again, but that today was just any other day. Dawn thought that was a stupid thing to say. I think I agree with her. But I wasn't going to give her the satisfaction of telling her that.
A look at the clock told me I had ten minutes left. Willow, who saw me look at the clock, then said that I had to be late, I shot her a look, there was no way I was going to be late. I don't care if it's a tradition! I need to do this ASAP, before I go insane. Willow then said that I didn't have to be late if I didn't want to. I personally think she said that so I would stop being annoyed, I just nodded and felt the urge to sit down and I think I would have if someone hadn't knocked on the door.
Dawn asked who it was, it was Xander, and he let himself in. He looked very handsome in his tux, I asked how I looked and did a little mock twirl. When I looked into his eyes, they were shiny with tears. What is it with everyone getting weepy? It's not that big of a deal. Okay, I lie. It is a big deal, but today seems so natural to me, I know it's what I should be doing.
Xander told me I was beautiful and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I pulled him into a hug and whispered that it meant the world to me that he was here. He embraced me tightly, saying he wouldn't have missed it for the world. He pulled away and told Dawn and Willow they looked great too, he even said it to Giles, who only glared at him.
That's Xander, always with the jokes. It's nice to have someone who'll make you feel better in any situation. I was about to ask Xander who everyone outside was, when there was another knock on the door. I rolled my eyes and got the door myself. It was Faith, Robin and Andrew. Wonderful, just bloody wonderful.
Faith, Robin and Andrew entered the small room (which now held eight people), each hugged me as they passed and said that I looked amazing, beautiful or fantastic. I wish people would stop saying that. I mean, I did know that I looked good, but with everyone telling me all the time is making me very self-conscious. You could imagine that, huh? The longest running Vampire Slayer getting self-conscious about compliments.
I go to sit down again, nearly make it too, before everyone yelled to stay standing. I mumble that I was sorry and begin to silently pace the length of the room, which I quickly discover is ten of my steps long. As I take another look at the clock – five minutes to go – there's another knock on the door.
It was Connor. I'm glad he and Angel have reconciled, it means the world to Angel that he can be near his son. Yeah, I know about Darla, Connor, Holtz, Jasmine, the Beast (quite an original name), evil Cordelia…well, actually everything. Angel told me…how long ago was it? Um, after the fight against the Black Thorn and crew. Angel and Spike, along with this Illyria demon, who used to be Fred, came over to Italy and we talk, yelled, I punched Angel and then they went back to the States.
Spike wasn't there that day, he was living it up in Japan, or so he said. But he did ring me up that morning to wish me luck and to once again say sorry for not coming. He actually said: for not being able to come. But I know he could have if he wanted to, it's just that he didn't. I don't blame him.
Connor walked to me and hugged me, kissed me on the cheek, said I was beautiful and that Angel was nervous as all hell. He then said what I'd been waiting for.
It was time to go.
Wow, time to go…I change my mind. I meekly say I can't do this. They all stare at me as though I'd lost my mind. A couple laughed, Xander thanked me for me humour, but said that my comic timing needed work. Connor takes my hand and tells me that it will okay. Okay? Is he out of his mind? This could be a complete disaster!
Connor practically forced me out the room, I thought for a moment that I should grab the doorframe and not let go, but Connor was holding one hand and my other had the flowers in it. I could've ditched the flowers but it was too late, we'd passed the door. See, this is breaking my concentration…oh, god.
Willow, Dawn and Faith walked faster to get in front of me. The guys were happy to waste some time and walked pretty slowly. Andrew came up to me and said that he was glad to be here celebrating today with his friends. I smile and tell him that I wouldn't have had it any other way. Come on, he's weird and cute, but then there is that thing were evil likes him a whole bunch.
Andrew said he'd see me later, and goes through the side door to sneak back to his first row seat. The others started pairing up: Willow and Connor (they were maid of honour and best man), Xander and Dawn and Faith and Robin. I stand a bit away watching them talk happily, admire each other's attire or, in Xander's case, tease Faith for wearing 'a pretty dress.'
The panic came back in full force, my vision started to blur, which made me panic more. Giles called my name and I snap out of it. I again repeat that I can't do this and Giles started laughing. I whacked him on the arm and told him I was being serious. His face was filled with pain and he rubbed the spot where I hit him. I told him I didn't mean to hurt him. He said that he understood, but even though I might've been serious, I was also crazy.
I frown and was about to say something back when the doors opened and the music began to play. It was a simplified and slowed down version of Wild Horses. It sounded beautiful.
Giles took my arm and slid it through his looped one. Willow and Connor began walking first, then Dawn and Xander, finally Faith and Robin.
Giles started walking first, we stoped at the doors, out of sight from those in the other room. He turned to face me and kissed me on the cheek. He told me that in his heart I would always be his daughter, that he had never been so proud of me. I almost began to cry, I told him thank you and that he was the only person I would've considered to give me away.
A few seconds later I was walking toward Angel. Damn, he looked amazing! I smiled when his eyes met mine. I felt like I was drowning. How could I have panicked? I was being a crazy person, that was the biggest moment of my life, the one thing I thought would never happen, but it did.
We reached the end. I beamed like a wonderfully, happy, beaming person as Giles hugged me and put my hand in Angel's. Giles told everyone that he gives me to Angel, this it was his honour and gave his love to both of us. Angel thanked him and squeezed my hand. I smiled at them both as my mouth wouldn't do anything else, I couldn't speak. Words weren't enough.
Not long later, I was telling Angel that words would never, ever, explain what I felt for him. But that I was willing and able to spend the rest of my life, the rest of time, showing him.
We got married that day, one and a half years after he turned human. We had a long engagement because we wanted to travel the world before getting married. Now that we were ready to 'settle down,' we are going to have a crack at a normal life as – the very un-normal people – could get.
/Wait a minute baby...
Stay with me a while
Said you'd give me light
But you never told me about the fire
Drowning in the sea of love
Where everyone would love to drown
And now it's gone
It doesn't matter what for
When you build your house
Then call me home
Hold on, the night is coming and the starling
Flew for days
I'd stay at home at night all the time
I'd go anywhere, anywhere, anywhere
Ask me and I'm there yeah ask me
And I'm there because I care
In the sea of love
Where everyone would love to drown
But now it is gone
They say it doesn't matter any more
If you build your house then please call me
All I ever wanted
Was to know that you were dreaming
There's a heartbeat
And it never really died/
THE END.