LOST SOULS
This is an AU for Drew and what he might be processing with the possibility of an unknown future or past and who he might find as a companion along the way. Let me know what you think or if I should continue and if so who should join him please leave your suggestions in the reviews. I don't own the characters.
Drew sat at his desk fingering his ring finger for what seemed like an eternity trying as he might to concentrate on the deadline he was facing. Nina had been MIA and unfortunately with Sam no longer involved with Aurora Media the brunt of the work landed squarely on his shoulders. Now it wasn't as though he wasn't up for the challenge, but on days like today he found increasingly more difficult to keep his normally well-trained mind focused on the task at hand.
Drew felt a bit lost and although he knew in his heart he should be focusing on his future he couldn't really escape his past or what he thought was his past without feeling confused and as though everything was muddled. At every turn he questioned where he started and Jason Morgan stopped both in his mind and his heart. He wanted so badly to have his own life free of this looming shadow he was trapped in haunted by the life of the notorious hit man, but to truly free himself would the risk be worth the potential reward? He had committed himself to starting a new chapter yet he was reminded of what was at every turn.
Flashback
Sitting on the couch so close to Sam again desperately trying to find a balance between respecting their divorce yet filled with doubt that what they shared truly touched her the way it did him. After hearing Mike find the similarities in his longing to be with Sonny's mother and how a love like that never truly fades away he couldn't help, but feel drawn to Sam and wonder was that how she felt about him or Jason? He never wanted to push her to truly examine if the love they shared was built in each of them thinking he was Jason or if there was in fact something far more that connected them.
When he finally worked up the courage to ask if she would take back what they shared knowing what she knows now he held his breath anticipating the worst-case scenario and when she told him that she never will it was as though he could finally breathe again. He had no idea that he had held so much worth in the possibility of what was all a figment of his imagination or her genuine feelings.
A wave of peace come over him in that instance and for once he actually trusted her words to be true and from the heart as he leaned his forehead against her shoulder he sighed and took solace in that confirmation.
End of Flashback
Drew shook his head as though he were caught in a storm of emotions being bashed at every angle he couldn't imagine how to get himself back to that place of serenity after what he just witnessed. Every doubt and insecurity that had plagued him since the return of his brother surrounded him and he couldn't escape the on slot of images bombarding him. The mixture of hurt and despair coupled with anger and rage was taking over at the thoughts and images of HIS no she was never really his in fact. Sam loved him in name only and it was clear her pity for the circumstances he was dealt was ultimately the reason she stayed with him.
He got up from his desk and went to the wet bar and noticed there really wasn't anything there that would quite help him given his current state of mind so he grabbed his jacket and headed out.
He found himself walking along the pier that dreaded place that seemed to haunt him in his dreams and out. He dreaded it and was drawn to it all in the same way and it was like he couldn't escape this hold it had over him. He thought back to when Helena had the chip inside of him and he would meet her there as Jake Doe carrying out his soldier orders and then when he had his massive confrontation with Jason in a drunken brawl now that was a night he didn't regret he finally had enough of the weight of his brother's sins and it felt good to unleash his hatred and disgust on the man.
As the water lapped up against the wood the sound soothing to his raging emotions lost in the tranquility and enormity of the water and how vast it spread and the havoc it could reap he didn't hear her approach when a soft hand found his arm and her smile light up the night sky.