Bleed to Blue
Author: Katleap
Pairings: 1x2 3x4
Warnings: violence, language, death
Disclaimer: Don't own them.
AN: This is the end of the Blue arc. Thank you for reading!
phone conversation
/written words/
Bleed to Blue
The feeling is surreal but the blood's still on my hands
Guilty I may be but you're the epitome
Blaming the world for your crimes
Soon comes the ending where I'll be left standing
Alone here to die, On my time
I'll stay numb until the guilt is gone
When blood stained on my hands is fading
-Blood on My Hands, 32 Leaves
A week after I was released from the hospital, those stirrings of unease rose up to bite me in the ass. I had been half hoping that they would just go away, but I have never been so lucky.
I was escaping from Sally. Halfway down to the Forensics lab, I remembered that 'Fei had left his laptop in the car. I was going to visit Marisole and see if they had gotten anything more off the clone that had been found. If Mari was busy, I could work on something while I waited for Sally to discover I had vanished again. I was stepping out of the building when the fiery roar of a bomb went off in the parking lot.
There was a brilliant ball of flame and the sound of shrapnel hitting cars. I was there almost before the debris stopped falling.
It was Wufei's car.
Where the shiny red vehicle had stood was now a burned out, blackened hull. Flames licked what was left that would burn. Wreckage was scattered around, the few pieces that were still blazing, crackled mournfully. The smell of gasoline, smoke and burning rubber and leather tainted the air.
Wufei lay sprawled on the ground, partly shielded by a neighboring car. Une wouldn't let me legally carry my gun. Something about recovering agent and all that shit. But I had my knives. Two were naked in my hands as I expanded my senses for danger. There was nothing. Who ever had done this had come and gone. I sheathed the knives and ran for 'Fei.
I slid to my knees on the pavement. He was bleeding from a dozen shallow cuts and there was the beginnings of a fantastic bruise along the left side of his face. There was a long piece of shrapnel embedded though his shoulder and a 10 inch gash on his right thigh. Various scraps and road rash dotted his skin.
" 'Fei….'Fei…. Come on…Come on wake up."
He groaned and his eyelashes fluttered.
"Come on, 'Fei wake up for me."
"…Duo…"
"Yeah." I touched the relatively undamaged shoulder gently. "The medics are coming. You're going to be fine."
Then I was overwhelmed by people and pushed out of the way. Medics, agents, bomb squad, and right on their heels was Commander Une. Medics whisked Wufei away and agents set to work on roping off the site.
Une motioned and I stood. "Come with me, Maxwell."
"What happened?" she asked as soon as we were clear of the site.
"I have no fucking idea." I was not thinking about moderating my language in front the commander. "Not one fuckin' clue."
She raised an eyebrow, but did not reprimand me. "You were the first on site. Give me your explanation of why you were there and impressions of the attack."
"I was on my way to borrow Chang's laptop. I was exiting the doors when I heard and saw the explosion. I made my way there and surveyed the scene. There was not sign of a perpetrator, nor did I sense one. I checked Chang for life threatening injuries. There were none. Then the masses arrived."
We reached the doors to the medical wing. "I will expect a report in writing."
"Yes ma'am." I grinned at her. "You'd better call Quatre, before he decided to ream your ass."
Thanks Quatre's influence over the past six years, the Preventers had blossomed. The red tape restrictions had one by one been demolished. It could function as it needed too now. Quatre was made into a secret Preventers head. It allowed him to run his own squad of Black Ops. His team consisted of Agents Earth, Night, Day, and Ice. Various agents may be transferred in and out depending on missions and training. But he was very protective of his core team.
"Thanks for the advice Maxwell." She said dryly. "I am well aware of Winner and his reaming tendencies. I suggest you go supervise Chang before he and Sally get into it again."
I saluted and went to rescue Wufei from the "sadistic onna". By the time I made it to Sally's private infirmary, they were already going at it. Wufei was sitting on the table, Sally working on his shoulder. Blood was splattered on his uniform and drying on his hands.
"What the fuck happened?" I interrupted their squabbling.
"What do you think happened Maxwell. My …Dammit Onna! That Hurt!"
Sally laid the shrapnel piece on the tray that already held many pieces of twisted bloody metal. "You have numerous several inch pieces of metal embedded in your hide. I think it should hurt, Chang."
He gritted his teeth and distracted himself by turning his attention back to me. "My car blew up. I went to get my laptop and decided to start the car to change out that Cd of yours. I set the laptop down and was going back to turn off the car when it flew to pieces."
"How long was the car on?"
"Thirty seconds at most."
"Enough time for us to be leaving." I breathed. Wufei whipped his head back around to look at me. "What are you saying Maxwell? Why would…"
The door banged open. "I'm sorry Dr. Po but we need to question the two agents who were on scene." Several investigating agents crowed into the room and our conversation was put on hold.
The whole reason I had been in the Preventer Headquarters was to see Sally. She was the only one in medical aspects I trusted. You know my hate of drugs and hospitals, well doctors are right up there next to them. I am much more comfortable letting one of the other pilots patch me up. Unfortunately, my wounds would heal better with professional help, so I was stuck with a doctor. The good thing was that it was Sally. The bad thing was that she is sadistic.
Heero had been right in warning me about my stitches. I popped quite a few of them. Sally had not been happy. Plus I am not a good patient. She was so thoroughly fed up with me that she released me early. The catch was that I had to come in every two days and let her check me out.
It wasn't that bad. We were staying at Quatre's estate that was only a 15 minute drive away for the Preventer Headquarters. Which was a good thing because all of us where involved in the clone case. With the deaths of The President, Chancellor Argus and half a dozen prominent senators, the Preventers had to produce public results. The raid of senator Silk's Amsterdam mansion had been very public, as had the bloody corpses. There were still pictures on the news of those bodies and blood slick floors.
The reporters had been vicious. They swarmed the Preventers Headquarters, the Preventers hospital and Quatre's estate. We were mobbed everywhere we went. It was madness. The good thing was that there were no charges of any kind brought against any of us. After the last war, Une had added all five us to the Preventers agent list. Even after our "deaths", Une had been unable to bring herself to change the duty status of Wuffy, Heero or me. We were listed as inactive, not deceased. It allowed her to say that for the years we had been "deceased" we had really been under cover. That she knew our whereabouts at all times and everything was done with permission. It cleared up a lot of technical red tape stuff.
Wufei had gotten back from a mission late last night. He had to come in and report to Une, so we came in together. His car had been bombed. It was timed to go off after we started the car. If we had been inside, both of us would have been killed. I couldn't help thinking this had something to do with the clone case.
The Preventers had found a lot of evidence at Silk's mansion. Turns out the lab where the Clones had been made was in the basement. The only way to get to it was through the hidden door next to the back stairs. That's where 04 had been coming from the day that I had seen him and explained the absences of a door sound.
In the lab they found the remains of a clone. It had been thoroughly destroyed. No recognizable features and the bones were blackened and half melted. However it had died, it had been painful and slow. The lab techs were currently trying to get a DNA sample off it, so that they could correctly identify the clone. We were already pretty sure that it is was my clone. They just wanted to make sure.
It was hours before they let us go home. Heero came to get us. The ride home was silent. It seemed that the death game we had been playing, had just gotten more complicated.
It was late afternoon when I finally got out of Preventer Headquarters. It had been six days since the car bombing and I ended up getting Wufei's fieldwork. His shoulder had come out with the most damage and would be in a sling for the next little while. There was more information that needed to be gathered and 'Fei couldn't do it with his arm in a sling. Sally had not been happy about me doing fieldwork, but Heero, Trowa and Quatre had too much to do already. So she caved, but countered that with daily check ups and lots of lectures.
I had just gotten back from a "sneak and snatch". Nothing more than a little B&E, in an office building, on the other side of the world. I was gone for two days; Sally acted like I had taken on an army all by myself. So instead of it being 3 it was after 6 by the time I made it back to the house.
My black motorcycle went into the garage and it was then that I noticed how quiet it was. Quatre had sent all the servants away and the cleaning lady only came on Monday. It wasn't Monday. The hair on the back of my neck stood on end and my skin prickled.
Heero would have scolded me for not picking up on it sooner. I was tired, irritated and completely worn out. I hadn't slept at all during the time I'd been gone. The knives came out and I wished for my gun. I slunk into the shadows and stealthily made my way into the house.
It was cool and quiet. I immediately hated it. There was nothing on the first floor, I could feel it. Both Quatre and Trowa were suppose to be home. With a tight knot of trepidation in my gut, I made my way to the second floor.
The five of us had three rooms at the north end of the house. I went the opposite way. Three quarters down a hallway, one of the doors was slightly ajar. I knew it had been left that way on purpose. I was whispering under my breath. "Please don't be dead. Please don't be dead. Please don't be dead."
I opened the door and saw nothing. The bed was a huge immaculate monstrosity. There were curtains over the windows and none of the three mirrors had cracked. It looked perfectly untouched, except for the open balcony doors and the rope tied to the bed.
Quatre lay on the balcony, hands tightly bound above his head, the rope running to the bed where it was secure. His legs were bound together at the knee and more ropes ran around the white cast to trail over the edge of the balcony.
"Quat!"
He was so still, I thought he was dead. As I was looking for it, I could see the small rise and fall of his chest as I crossed the room to reach him.
"Quatre. You gotta wake up. Come one buddy, open those eyes."
"Duo?" My name came out a half strangled moan.
"Yeah it's me."
"T…T…ro…wa" His eyes blinked at me. "M…my… leg" He panted out.
There was no spreading pool of blood so I turned my attention to his leg. The softer white cast was ripped and entangled in ropes that tautly hung over the edge. It clicked. Trowa.
I lurched to my feet, flinging myself at the edge.
The pool was right below the balcony. Trowa hung by his wrists, the water lapping at his knees. He was handcuffed at the wrist and ankles. Ropes wrapped around his wrists and there was a noose around his neck. The handcuffs on his ankles were weighted and a gag stretched tight across his mouth. He had been beaten to a bloody unconscious pulp.
The scary part was I could see the ingenious of it. The fucker had secured Trowa to Quatre's broken leg. Free Quatre in anyway first and Trowa would hang or drown before you could get to him. However there was a time limit. The pool was being drained. The water kept Trowa from hanging but if no one found them, Trowa would hang when the water ran out. And to top it off Trowa couldn't even try to get out of it without damaging, possibly even killing Quatre.
I took all this in, in seconds, then I had my phone out, randomly pushing one of the speed dial buttons.
"Hello…"
"Sally." I cut her off before she could get the whole greeting out of her mouth. "I need medical evac, now!"
"Duo? Where are you? You were just…"
"We don't have time for this. I'm home. Get here now."
"But Duo.."
"There's been another accident."
"But what about yo…"
I clicked the phone shut and dropped it to the floor. I ignored it as it began to ring again. I had work to do.
"Sorry Quat." I said as I passed him. He wasn't quite unconscious, just floating on the edge there. I couldn't help him first.
I raced down to the pool, toeing my shoes off as I crossed the grass. I dove into the water and swam to Trowa's feet. The weights had to go first. They were only tied on and I cut them off quick, letting them sink to the bottom. I hauled myself out of the water and raced back up to the room.
Hanging over then edge of balcony, I grasped the rope and began to haul Trowa up. I'm not as strong as Heero but I'm able to deal when I need too. I got him up and over, then cut him loose. He never even flinched, he was so deep into unconsciousness. I pulled off the gag and removed the fabric wadded behind it. I crawled over to Quatre and cut his bonds too. Then I went back to his leg. It had been completely rebroken.
By then there was the buzz of choppers, and seconds later one landed on the back lawn. I ignored them kept at Quatre's leg. They would have seen us from the air they could find us. The rope had cut deeply into the skin in some places. I began carefully unwinding it, trying to get all pieces out.
It wasn't until there was a soft touch on my shoulder that I realized that I wasn't alone any more. The knife was out and resting against the person's throat before I could stop the reaction.
"Duo." My name was said softly.
I recognized Sally's face and pulled the knife away. She breathed a sigh of relief.
"Duo, we need to take Quatre now." I looked over, all that was left of Trowa were a few smears of blood and water.
I nodded and tried to stand. My legs didn't seem to want to hold me and that I was shaking like a leaf. I took a deep breath and brought myself back under control. I stood smoothly and we hurried to the chopper. Sally didn't fuss about me hanging up on her or that I was soaking wet and shoeless. She didn't even ask to look at my hands or healing injuries, she could see how on edge I was. I belted in and then curled up as much as I could. I trembled the whole entire ride.
Une and Heero were waiting on the roof for us. Sally was gone instantly, rushing to oversee her patients. I followed at a more sedate pace. I wanted nothing more than to crawl into Heero's embrace and let him make it all go away. Instead, I didn't touch him and most carefully ignored him. I knew he understood, if I touched him I would completely fall apart and I couldn't do that yet. As I reported to Une, we walked down to the waiting room.
"Maxwell, how much sleep did you get in the past three days?"
I met her eyes startled. "Almost none, ma'am" I responded automatically.
She ran her eyes over me, evaluating. "You need to see a psychologist."
I didn't respond to that. "If you will excuse me a moment, there is something I need to do." I turned and walked down the right hand hallway. The labs weren't far and I found Mari bent over her work.
"Found anything yet?" I asked when she acknowledged my presence.
"No. We think we found an undamaged strand but it could be a little while before we can confirm it."
"All right." I reached over and picked up a sheet of paper. Tearing off a piece, I wrote my cell number on it. "Call me when you do."
She nodded. "Of course. As soon as I know."
"Thanks." I turned to go.
"Duo." I stopped and looked back over my shoulder. "You might want someone to look at your hands."
I left and made my way to the waiting room. Heero was waiting for me. The minute I entered, he was there and I practically collapsed against him. He scooped me up in his arms and retreated to the couch. Wufei was already there, a set of scrubs, water, bandages and antibiotic cream laying on the small table beside him.
They patched me up, got me dry and then the three of us curled up together. A little while later Sally came to tell us that they would be fine. Somewhere deep down I guessed what was happening. Three of the four people I loved were hurt. There was only one left and it was obvious. I desperately did not want to face it.
I spent a long and sleepless night curled between 'Fei and 'Ro, trying to convince myself that it wasn't possible. By the time it was morning, I still didn't believe me.
I was on my way back to the house when my cell rang. Sally had sent us home after letting us see that Q and Tro were okay. Both had been sleeping soundly. We had come back and crashed. I only managed to sleep a few hours when the nightmares hit. They were so bad that not even Heero could calm me enough to go back to sleep. I needed out of the house and Wufei was gripping about being out of tea, so I volunteered to go get some. I took one of the cars instead of my motorcycle.
I snatched up the cell and flicked it open. "Maxwell." There were a select few who had this number; anyone calling on it had something important to say.
"Duo this is Mari."
"You got the results?" My grip on the steering wheel tightened.
"Yes but they were…" She groped for the right world. "Not what we expected."
"Spit it out Mari."
"The DNA did not match you. It was a match to Mr. Winner."
I swear the whole world did a loop de loop right in front of my eyes. It was all I could do to breathe and not crash the car.
"There's one more thing" She continued. "Mr. Winner has been mumbling in his sleep. He keeps asking for you and wanting to know why. It doesn't make any sense…"
"Mari" I interrupted her. "Thank you." I clicked the phone shut, dropped it on the seat and then proceed to see how many traffic laws I could break on my way home.
I made it back in record time, barely remembering to turn off the car as I flew into the house. Wufei was sitting in the lounge having a cup of tea. He looked up as I barged in.
"Maxwell didn't you just leave?"
"NO! I just got back. Where's Heero?"
Wufei's eyes got really big. "Duo you were just here a minute ago."
"NO I WAS NOT! Where's Heero?"
"But you were just…" He looked down at the tea in his hands and set it back on the table. I did not have time for this. I whirled for the stairs, taking them three at a time. I could hear Wufei behind me.
I banged through our bedroom door, seeing the tea on the table, the over turned chair and my lover's prone body in one glance.
"God, No." I breathed. "Please No."
I was on my knees feeling for a pulse. There was one, it was weak. Wufei knelt on the other side, checking his eyes and mouth.
"Poison" He said flatly
I glanced at the table and froze. Sitting there, so innocently, was a white envelope and a two inch cylinder.
The envelope had my name on it.
I tore it open.
/Westshore Company. I have the antidote. /
I picked up the cylinder and popped the lid. The smell was slightly sweet. "Dust." I murmured.
"Dust?"
I nodded. "We don't have much time." I reached down and hauled Heero into a sitting position. I pulled one of his arms across my back and over my shoulder; the other went around his waist.
"Maxwell, you can't do this."
I ignored him and got to my feet. I dragged Heero out the door, down the stairs and outside to the car. Wufei followed me, still carrying the letter and the sliver cylinder. He was yelling at me.
"Maxwell. Have you lost your mind? There is no antidote. You're going to get yourself killed. Be reasona…"
I fisted my hand in his shirt and slammed him into the car. "Listen to me because I will only explain this once. We have a little less than an hour before Heero can't be saved. There is an antidote, but it must be made before hand for that specific vial. My damn clone would make it just to taunt that he could be saved."
Wufei was not happy about my action towards him, but he stayed still and listened to me. "You have to take Heero to Sally, see what she can do to slow down the poison."
I shoved him into the car. "What about you?"
"I'm going to find this fucker and kill him." I pulled my bike out. "Now go."
"Duo" Wufei rarely used my first name. When he did, I had a tendency to listen. I paused. "How do you know he'll have it?"
I looked squarely at him. "Because he's me."
It was a warehouse. Why was I not surprised. I pocketed the keys to my bike and made for the door. It was unlocked, just as I thought it would be. I really wished in that moment for my gun. It unfortunately was still in Une's office and I hadn't thought to grab one of Heero's on my way out. It would be so much easier to just shoot him. But he was me and would definitely find a way to make the fight in his favor without bullets.
I entered to find it empty.
"I know you're here, come out."
My voice echo eerily back at me from the shadows. "How do you know it's me and not you?"
"Cut the bullshit and get to the point."
"Exactly." hissed my voiced behind me and I threw myself forward. I felt tugging as a blade nicked the tail of my shirt. I rolled, finding a knife and throwing it the instant I made it to my knees. He dodged and it stuck quivering in the wall.
We were now a good twenty feet from each other and I got a good look at my clone. He noticed and spun in a little circle. "You like?" he leered.
It was like looking in a mirror. Even the clothes were close. Jeans and a black tee. Mine had sliver writing on it and my hair as just a few inches longer. Small details suddenly seemed important.
He grinned and attacked, long knives flashing. Mine flickered into my hands and I met him. We crashed together, a tangle of bright blades and swirling hair. I drew blood along his collar. He drew blood along my hip. I got his ribs, he got my thigh. Slash for slash, blood for blood. We parted, panting.
There was a maniac gleam in his eyes. We stalked around each other, wary.
"So, you want to hear my sob story as to why I'm doing what I'm doing." He threw and I ducked.
"Not really." I growled as I blocked his strike. "All I want is the antidote."
His foot spun out skimming my stomach as I danced away. "Antidote? What antidote?"
"You son of a bitch, where is it?" The tip of my blade marked his cheek.
He jumped back. "You mean this?" He held up a small sliver cylinder and I went stupid.
I charged him, wanting it. He flickered his wrist and a small blade shot low, grazing across my calf. It was enough. I faltered for a half step. He lashed out, boot connecting to my head. I fell and he followed me down. I stabbed upwards, sinking the knife into his shoulder as he grabbed my forearm and twisted. There was a sickening crack and pain blazed though my body. He didn't let go of the arm.
"Now in order for this to work I have exactly 14 minutes to tell you what's going on."
I tried to buck him off and he twisted my arm in his grip. Waves of pain resonated through me and black spotted my vision. "Stay the fuck still and I won't have to do that again." He snarled.
I could barely see and breathing was hard with him sitting directly on my chest, knees pinning my shoulders and left arm. When I made no reply, he took it as assent. "Good. I always knew we would get along famously." He smiled and trailed a knife blade down my cheek. "Now first things first. Your boy toy is not going to die. I only gave him a half dose. But thanks to you, they all believe that he will die in about 24 minutes. I will show up right on time with the antidote and he will live. Then I will proceed to destroy their lives."
He leaned down putting his face right into mine. "Pity you won't be around to see the Gundam five fall apart." He twisted viciously on my arm and blackness overwhelmed me.
I came to less then a minute later. Those familiar violet eyes staring right at me. "Can't have you falling asleep during my story."
I repressed a shutter. This was me. Every aspect complete with my lightning quick personality changes and malicious streak, magnified several times over. Simply put my clone was a sane lunatic. He was my reflection in a broken mirror. What I could have been if I had been less resilient then I was.
"Now let's see where I was? Oh yeah, Quats brought you up to speed on the evil plan and all but he didn't tell you about us specifically. Now we were created to be you so we should have the same relationships as you. Therefore they put Yuy with me and Barton with Quats. But it didn't quite work that way.
He was running his fingers up and down my arm, causing sparks of pain. "See me and Quats hit it off but we both had others we were involved with. Then we found them trying to replace us. They had a new 04. I killed him. Acid, oil and flame. Messy example, then we got rid of Bently. Quats by then had figured everything out.
"I don't see how this involves me."
"You'll see. It is entirely all your fault." He hit me. "You took him from me and then you killed him. It's your fault he's dead. That they're all dead. That they left me behind." There was a blow behind every sentence and each one sent my head into the concrete I was laying on.
My clone was practically screaming. "He loved you. Like he never loved me and you BETRAYED HIM!"
I took my chance. I pulled my left leg up hard hitting him in the side and pushing him to the right. Unprepared for it he rocked and freed my left arm. I shoved the palm of my hand under his chin and he came off me. I scrambled up. He kicked at my feet and I stumbled. He was up in a flash and slammed me into the wall, making my broken right arm take the brunt of our weight.
The pain was so much I couldn't black out. Tears rolled down my cheeks and there was the feel of a blade plunging into me. I was caught between two agonies. Strung out and gasping. He jiggled the blade a bit and I could barely breathe.
"You bastard!" The tone was dark and littered with glass amusement. I recognized it, Shinigami. I was my own worst nightmare. A hand wrapped around my throat and began to squeeze. "He was everything and you destroyed it.
"I don't know what you're talking about." I rasped out.
He looked deep into my eyes and I stared directly into Shinigami. "You really don't, do you." The hand on my throat loosened enough so that I could breathe. "When we started exercising our influence, Quats and I became a couple. However Barton was totally devoted to Quats and Yuy to Chang but he was with me so we couldn't just alienate them. I don't know who or what Chang wanted but it might have been Barton. Anyway then we got you." He leaned in and lapped at my tears on my skin. "In order for you to believe that we were your friends I had to stay out of the way. I wasn't happy about that."
My mind was backtracking, remembering my stay with the clones. The strange instances, that seemed like hauntings, were really my clone throwing temper tantrums. "Then I did hear you talking to Hee…01 in the room, before I woke up. I thought that it was a dream."
"I knew it. But Yuy wouldn't take me seriously about it and then he had to go and actually fall in love with you. And then you killed him." He hissed. "You killed both of them." The knife twisted sending another wave of pain up. "Well die."
He pulled the knife out and blood gushed from the wound. It spilled out, thick, warm and red. He let me go and I slid down the wall to fold at his feet.
"I'm going to stand here and watch you die. Just like you did for both of them. You'll bleed out soon." He smirked. "I never could figure out what it was about you that made you so special. Guess it doesn't matter."
He was standing directly in front of me, toying with the sliver cylinder. The antidote.
The thought broke through all the pain. I had to save Heero.
"I'm going to destroy him. Your Heero will think you never loved him by the time I'm through. He'll go to his end knowing that you manipulated and betrayed…"
I kicked his knee out. He fell, surprised, thinking that I was used up. I threw myself forward, my good arm yanking the knife from my boot, the twin of the one that had killed his lover. I buried it in his chest, not quite killing him instantly.
We locked eyes, nearly nose to nose. A small half smile tugged at his lips. "Guess that's why." He coughed; blood trickled from his lips. I could feel the failing rhythm of his heart under me. "Just wished… that…that he could h…have….maybe….for me.
A bloody hand grabbed my braid and dragged my ear to his lips. Then his breath came out in one final rush and he lay still. I had killed myself. The only question now was if he had managed to kill me.
I levered myself up, using my good arm, my right cradled against my chest. Using one of the knives I cut the off the bottom of the tee that was not blood soaked. Then I pulled a Heero Macho Yuy and set my own arm. I screamed and struggled not to pass out. I hurriedly bound the scraps of shirt in a make shift wrap. I didn't have time to find something to splint it with.
The sliver cylinder lay a few feet away, where it had rolled when I'd kicked him. I scooped it up, put it in my pocket and pulled out my keys. I would have called for help but my cell was still in the car where I had tossed it. I was bleeding a lot. I wrapped my broken arm around my torso as best I could to try to slow it down.
I staggered across the warehouse, struggled with the door and stumbled to my bike. It took me three tries to mount it. After I managed to get on, I had to just sit there, forcing myself to stay with it. When my vision cleared enough, that I could see again I placed my right hand on the handlebars and prepared for a very painful ride.
I managed to make to the Preventers hospital in one piece. I tumbled off the bike just barely catching myself from taking a nosedive onto the pavement. Arm pressed tight against the hole in me, I lurched inside. I think I gave some nurses the fright of their life. One of them came running up to me, preventing me from falling. She was talking but I couldn't hear her.
I shook my head. "Yuy or Po, now." I pulled away from her nearly plummeting to the floor.
I could hear her this time when she spoke. "I'm sorry. Dr. Po has given orders that no one is to disturb her until a Mr. Maxwell gets here."
I looked at her incredulously. "Lady, I am Maxwell." Then everything descended into chaos.
I don't remember much after that. Maybe it's a thing with me and hospitals and getting hurt. For the first twenty-four hours I'm not allowed to remember anything. There was a lot of pain and I was cold, then it all faded away.
It didn't really matter. I had made it within the hour time limit. Just barely, but I had. Heero was going to be just fine and that was the only thing that was relevant. Heero was fine.
All four of us ended up in a room together. Wuffers stayed with us. I think it was because he didn't want to be alone in that huge house, but he says it's so I wouldn't do anything stupid.
Heero was the first of us to recover. The antidote kicked in and twenty-four hours later, he was right as rain. With Quatre, they reset his leg and plastered it again. Tro and I took a little longer to get better. During our time together, he told me that he knew it wasn't me. I was grateful for that.
With no more psycho clones out for our blood, we healed in relative peace. Une got full reports from all of us and declared us on vacation as soon as they showed the case. We stayed another week while they got all the facts straight and presented it to the world. The media went nuts again, so the five of us retreated for home, the half hidden, peaceful estate on The Beach.
The nightmares didn't go away. For a while, they were so bad that I couldn't sleep at all. So I went to the stupid psychologist. She tried but there wasn't anything she could do to help me. Gradually they toned down enough that I could function. Having one of the other pilots with me also helped. Heero could even soothe me out of one. But they came back periodically and when they did, it was with a holy vengeance. I was even more prone to them after missions.
It was three months later, and I was contemplating another sleepless night. I had just gotten off a mission, a particularly nasty one and I was exhausted. The dreams had gotten so bad that not even Heero could do anything. He had been on a different mission and it wasn't fair to him that I kept waking him. So I was curled in the big window of the main room, like I had the first night I spent in this house.
I had on bottoms but no top and my fingers gently traced the scars on my right side. It was strange. After one of my nightmares, I normally found something to distract myself with. I didn't want to think about it. But tonight my thoughts kept drifting back and for once, I let them.
The conversation I had with Quatre about a week after dealing with my clone, surfaced first. I had asked why none of them had me prove if I was the real Duo or not. He told me that they had gone and gotten the body. It was missing the healing lacerations on its right side. There had been no question that I was who I said I was. I protested that it wasn't enough.
He had put a finger on my lips and said. "Duo, your clone was insane, I could feel it. When I was conscious your clone kept talking about staying the hell away from his Quats and apologizing for hurting me while setting up Trowa's death." He moved both hands to grasp mine. "You have never called me that and my gift knows you. It can tell the four of you apart in a room full of genetic identicals. So don't worry about it."
But I did worry about it. I had killed the four people in the world closest to me, then killed myself. The Duo clone, my clone was a reflection of what I could have been. Insane with grief, half mad with love, and completely psychotic in regards to the world. I loved and hated that glimpse. I loved it because it showed what might have been and that I was not. I hated it because I could still become it.
There were footsteps behind me and Heero sat down next to me. "Hey." It was easy and low.
"Hey yourself" I replied just as soft. I scooted over to him, curling up between his legs, head resting against his chest. One hand intertwined with mine, the other wrapped around me and closed over my braid, slightly possessive.
"You have a window fetish." He smirked.
"Yeah, well you have a braid fetish." I countered. It was an old joke and true with both of us.
We sat there for a while, an easy quiet between us.
"You know, I think it was a relief for them in the end."
Heero didn't say anything; I rarely talked about my time spent with the clones and never about the encounter of my own clone.
"They were never given a chance to be themselves. Yes they were genetically identical to us, but that doesn't mean they have the same soul." I looked up from our joined hands to see his face. He didn't say anything but I could see the questions in his eyes.
"He told me that he was with 04. Called him Quats. He said that the people in charge paired them like we are, but it didn't quite go right. 01 wanted 05 and 03 wanted 04. He thought that 05 was fixated on 03 and that 04 really wanted power." I looked back down at our hands.
"Heero, my clone was in love with 01, but 01 wasn't in love with him. Then they brought me in and 01 fell for me." I burrowed into his shoulder more. "and I killed him. I just can't help but feel that I murdered someone innocent. I know he wasn't, I saw him come back covered in blood, but it's one thing to kill someone pretending. But if they really did, then what." I felt a tear escape from my rapidly fluttering lashes. It streaked down and Heero raised our clasped hands to catch it on our fingers.
"He was so bitter and jealous. I just kept thinking that I could be like that. If you ever left me, I could so easily turn into him. And I can't do that, I'm already so black that anymore would destroy me."
I lifted my head to him again. Dark eyes locked on to mine. "If …" I could barely get the words out. "If you ever decide to leave. Shoot me."
His eyes widened and the words came tumbling out. "I couldn't live like that. Being bitter and hurt and spiteful. I know I have a mean dangerous streak but his was huge. It made him unstable and if you ever went, I know I would loose it too. So please don't let me be like that. I just…mmmph."
Lips covered mine, warm, gentle and slightly chapped. They swallowed my words and drank down my fear. Caressing to the very depths of my blackened soul. After a small eternity, he let me go.
"Baka." His voice was tender. "I don't believe I could ever let you go. I love you. That my clone could come to feel for you in such a short time should tell you what I say is true. I can't resist you. You are mine and nothing can change that."
My eyes were smarting again and his fingers left mine to touch the wetness on my cheeks.
"I love you." I whispered and kissed him, trying to put everything I felt into that kiss. When we broke to breathe again, it felt as though pieces of my soul that had been shattered for a very long time, were knit back together.
We stayed that way, pressed as close together as we could. I gazed back out the window. The sky was lightening. It mixed shades of harsh black, deep blue and stormy violet. They swirled together as if collaborating on making the most perfect color ever.
"The last words he said were 'thank you'. He grabbed my braid and pulled my ear to his lips to tell me that right before he died. Do you think…" I bit my lip. "Do you think he's okay? That all of them are okay?"
Heero was silent for a minute. "Yes. I believe that they are just fine."
The colors had made up their mind. Where three separate pigments had been before was the exquisite cobalt of Heero's eyes. The blue that never failed to calm me, to lift me and to love me.
"It's beautiful." I breathed.
"Yes it is." But he wasn't looking at the sky; those vivid eyes were on me. "It's magnificent." He leaned down, breath tickling my ear. "Let me love you."
I smiled, one of those true ones that are always genuine. "Yes."
He looped my braid twice more around his wrist and led me back to bed. Later, sated and curled up in Heero's arms, I could see the sky softening to blue. As I drifted to sleep, I was sure of one thing.
Inside my black soul was bleeding to blue.
Owari