Shikamaru whimpered.
Kakashi smirked evilly under his mask, and then drew something out of a brown paper grocery bag. "Twizzlers? And Twix?" Shikamaru asked.
"And popsicles." The copy-nin was still smirking, and Shikamaru was frantically trying to out-think him. Popsicles he understood, although the other confections were still a mystery. What were Twizzlers anyway? Shikamaru's question was answered as Kakashi slowly drew out what looked like miles of thin red licorice rope.
"Ah, Kakashi, you know I've never had much of a sweet tooth." Shikamaru felt a whisper of relief as Kakashi layed the Twizzlers aside, but it was short-lived as he watched Kakashi begin to form hand signs for some sort of jutsu.
The smoke cleared and Shikamaru found himself completely divested of his clothing. "Where did you learn that"
Kakashi tapped his headband-covered eye.
"Yeah, but who the hell has a "strip-no-jutsu" and ..." Shikamaru grunted as Kakashi shoved the wrapped Twix bar crossways into his mouth.
"You talk too much . . .sweetie," teased Kakashi, as he wrapped a length of Twizzler around Shikamaru's head, holding the candy bar in place.
Shikamaru struggled, trying to chew through his confectionary gag. He pushed Kakashi away with one hand, reaching up to tear the licorice rope off his mouth with the other. "Now, now, Shadow-chan." Kakashi captured both of Shikamaru's hands in one of his own, then waved a handful of the rope at Shikamaru. "You look so sexy when you fight."
"Troublesome," thought Shikamaru, "but that means if I don't fight, maybe he'll get bored and give up on this stupid candy obsession."
Shikamaru relaxed, and let Kakashi lead him to his bedroom, guiding him to lie on his back on the bed. Shikamaru whimpered as Kakashi wound more red licorice ropes around his wrists. "Sexy...and delicious" sighed Kakashi. Shikamaru sighed. Bad enough he had to put up with Kakashi's warped sense of foreplay, without having to listen to his puns. Kakashi stabbed a kunai into the headboard, then tied the ropes around its handle, finishing with a few more wraps around Shikamaru's wrists. Shikamaru tugged at the candy bonds, trying to saw them against the kunai. He was reward by a metallic scraping noise. "Tsk, Shadow-chan. You aren't getting out of this that easily."
Then again, there was that pet-name again. Maybe Kakashi was committed to the stupid candy games. Had he been more in the mood for Kakashi's games, he would have taken that name as a signal to submit and enjoy the ride. Unfortunately, he really did have places to go, so why was the licorice suddenly so resistant? Kakashi's smugness was overpowering. He so seldom got one over on Shikamaru. "ToughRopes no Jutsu. Generally used to reinforce climbing ropes. Occasionally useful in restraining prisoners."
That explained it. Shikamaru struggled against the bonds for a moment, realizing that he was going to have to put up a real fight against Kakashi to get out of this. It might be less of a nuisance to simply go along with the idiot jounin. Certainly, it promised to be more enjoyable, if aggravating.
"Oh, damn. I forgot to get paper towels while I was out."
"Mmm mm?"
"No, not for this. I just happen to have run out. I'll be right back, don't go anywhere." Kakashi rose off the bed, then noticed that Shikamaru's shadow was creeping its way towards his throat.
"You've got no sense of humor, you know," whispered Kakashi, slipping his vest off, then settling back on the bed. "And you're so impatient."
Shikamaru whimpered around his gag, as Kakashi kissed his throat, then moved down his body. "I left the popsicles melting on the counter, too. I suppose you don't care about that, either?"
----
Kakashi nipped Shikamaru's cheek, then bit through the licorice rope and removed the Twix. Shikamaru glared at him through his post-orgamic haze, until curiosity finally won out. "Why a Twix?"
"I wanted a jawbreaker, but they were all out."