Hi guys. So, I wrote this story some time ago. I used to have it on my old account, but you guys know how I deleted all the stories from that account, right? Well, I have all of them saved, and I really like this story, so I wanted to put it back up. Like most of my stories, it includes some Kendall angst. :D
By the way guys, in this one-shot, Kendall is the second oldest, unlike in my other stories where he is the youngest. This takes place right after Big Time Break Up. Okay, here we go!
Kendall sighed as he leaned his head against the limo's transparent window. Unshed tears blurred his vision, but he did not let them fall. It took him a great amount of strength to keep them hidden, but being Kendall Knight, he managed to do just that. He couldn't cry, he had to be strong, confident, what he had been all his life.
When he felt an arm wrap around his shaking shoulders, he did not turn around. He already knew who it was.
"Are you okay, buddy?" James whispered with concern. The only other time he had seen Kendall this sad, was when his father had abandoned him and his family. Kendall was always so strong, nothing could ever break him down, but right now, the blond was broken. Heartbroken.
"I-I'm fine, James," came the muffled reply. He watched as Kendall dried his eyes with his jacket sleeve before turning to look at him. "I'll be fine... don't worry about me," he said with a forced smile.
Typical Kendall. Having to act as if nothing was bothering him, when in reality he was a mess inside. He decided not to push it, knowing he would never get the truth out of him. There was only one person that could get the truth out of him, and that person was Logan Mitchell.
James turned to look at Logan, who was to his right. Carlos was beside him, looking almost as sad as Kendall.
"What's wrong with Carlos?" he whispered quietly.
Logan shrugged before turning to whisper something in Carlos' ear. James watched with curiousity, not knowing what to expect. "He's sad about Jo leav... Ooops."
"Ooops, what?" James asked. He was clearly confused to why Logan had stopped talking without finishing the sentence.
Logan didn't even have to answer, for the answer to James' question came right after the long-haired brunette felt a slight movement to his left. He turned around to face Kendall, worry filling his eyes. The dirty blond had his right hand pressed against his forehead. Tears streamed down his face, making his cheeks damp and a light shade of red.
Being the oldest and almost as protective as the weeping boy, he wrapped his arms around him, pulling him close. To his surprise, Kendall did not try to get away from his grip. Instead, he kept on crying and sobbing in the older boy's arms.
Logan layed a hand on the taller boy's dirty blond hair, ruffling it slightly. Apparently the small gesture only caused the boy to cry even more.
Carlos just stared at the scene unfolding beside him. He took his helmet off and placed it on Kendall's head. He hoped that would make his big brother feel at least a little bit better.
It took a few minutes, but the blond finally managed to compose himself.
With his light green eyes full of embarrasment and red from crying, he turned to look at the three boys. His cheeks were flushed and wet. His bottom lip quivered. "I'm so sorry," he whispered, turning away to look out the window.
"Kendall, it's okay to cry. Everyone does it once in a while... even fearless leaders like you," Logan said quietly.
"Th-that's the problem, Logan. I-I-I'm not fearless. I try to be something I'm not, b-but the truth is... that I'm afraid of losing the ones I love. I'm afraid of nev-never seeing her again," Kendall stuttered.
"Hey, look at me," James said softly, but with determination in his voice.
Kendall shook his head.
"Kendall, I'm serious, look at me."
This time the younger boy turned around. His light green eyes landed on James' hazel ones.
"I'm gonna tell you something... I know it's gonna sound cheesy and all, but it is true," James paused to take a breath, "If you love something, set it free. If it doesn't come back, then it was never yours in the first place."
Kendall chuckled at the well-known saying. Fresh tears rolled down his face, but he managed a smile. "James, that's the cheesiest thing I have ever heard."
The limo pulled up in front of the Palm Woods. Carlos, Logan, and James quickly got out, leaving an upset-looking Kendall sitting on the seat.
"Kendall, aren't you coming?"
Kendall did not respond.
"Kendall?"
Again, no response came from the dirty blond boy.
"I'll get him," James said as he got into the limo once again. He grabbed Kendall's hand and pulled him out of the limo with ease. The dirty blond seemed to be a bit out of it. His gaze was fixed in space, as if he was unaware of his surroundings. His legs were wobbly and weak. Too wobbly to walk. James had to carry him if they wanted to get up to Apartment 2J.
It took all four boys just two minutes to get to the apartment, but by the time they got there James looked exhausted.
He quickly placed Kendall on the bright orange couch in the living room, having no strength to take him to his room.
Logan kneeled down in front of Kendall, James sat down beside the dirty blond, and Carlos stood beside him, laying a hand on his shoulder.
"Hey, buddy, can you hear me?" Logan asked.
Kendall nodded yes. He looked down at Logan, fear in his eyes. "D-do you guys think she w-was the one?" he finally asked.
Carlos smiled for the first time since they came back from the airport. "I say... she was the one, buddy."
Kendall smiled up at Carlos, then turned to James.
"Yes, she was. She'll come back for you." James chuckled as he ruffled Kendall's dirty blond hair.
Kendall then turned to Logan, a frown spread on his face. By the look Logan held in his face, he could tell something was bothering the smaller brunette.
"Hey, are you okay, Logie?"
"I'm fine," Logan said with a smile. "As for your question, I say yes as well."
Kendall forced a smile. He couldn't shake away the thought that Logan was sad. Something in his eyes just told him something wasn't right.
"So, how about we have a boys' night out!" James yelled. "You know, to get your mind off of things."
Kendall nodded, even though he was in no mood to go on a boys' night out. Not only was he worried for his smaller friend, but he also felt sick to his stomack knowing Jo had left to New Zealand for three years.
"So where do you wanna go, Kenny?" Carlos asked, bouncing up on his toes.
Kendall looked over at Carlos and then at James. "Ummm..."
"How about we go buy pink smoothies! You and Jo used to buy them all the time, and you would laugh and... Ouch!" Carlos glared at Logan and James. "I forgot! Besides, you didn't have to elbow me, you could've just-"
"Sit," Logan hissed as he pushed the short Latino to sit beside Kendall on the couch.
All three boys turned to face Kendall. They weren't surprised to find a look of sadness written all over his features.
"Uhh... How about we... uhhh... just stay here and play games or something?" Logan suggested.
Kendall nodded, grateful for the suggestion.
"Okay, do you want to play here in the living room or in your room?" James asked Kendall.
"My room," Kendall whispered. He got to his feet and walked over to the room he shared with Logan, trying to hide the tears that were threatening to spill from his eyes once again. James, Carlos, and Logan walked inside behind him.
"We got Monopoly, Connect 4, Tabboo, Twister, Jenga, Go Fish, and... Uno. Which one are we playing?" Carlos said as he rummaged through the stack of games Kendall and Logan had in their bedroom. His eyes turned to Kendall, expecting a response. The blond just shrugged, not caring which one they picked.
"Logie, you choose," he finally said.
Logan stared at the pile of games in front of him. Just like Kendall, he wasn't in the mood to play a game, but he picked one anyway. "Let's play Go Fish."
So the four boys sat in a circle on the floor. They played the card game for just thirty minutes, seeing that Kendall's eyelids were starting to give out on him.
"Let's call it a night," James said suddenly. "Kendall, you look tired. Go to sleep, buddy." Kendall nodded. "If you need anything just call us, okay?"
"M'kay," Kendall slurred as he layed down on his bed. "G'night, guys."
"Good night, buddy," both Carlos and James said before leaving the room.
As soon as both boys were gone, Kendall turned to look at Logan who was already on his bed, with a blanket pulled up to his chin.
"Logan, are you okay?"
Logan smiled as he turned on the lamp that was sitting on the night stand in between both their beds. "You know me to well."
Kendall gave a light chuckle. "What's wrong, Logez? I know something's bothering you, but what is it?"
Logan sighed. "I don't know. What James said to you got me thinking. You know, the thing about that if uhh... you know who was the one she would come back to you?"
"Y-yeah," Kendall's voice started to crack at the memory of Jo.
"I'm sorry, Kendall, I'll just stop," Logan said once he noticed the sadness lingering in the older boy's voice.
"No, go on, Logie."
Logan looked down at his fingers, hesitating to go on with what he was about to say. He didn't want to upset Kendall again, but Kendall was the only person he could talk to about this without feeling like a baby. "I miss Camille," was all that escaped his lips.
Kendall's eyes went wide. How could he have never thought that deep inside, Logan was just as broken as he was? The events of that very day had just caused the little brunette to remember what had happened to him just a few months before. The break-up he had with Camille.
"Logie, I am so sorry. I didn't know that-"
"It's not your fault, Kendall," Logan interrupted him. "You didn't know. I-I-I just wish I could get her back, you know? I-I'm sorry, I shouldn't be talking about this. You just broke up with Jo, and... Oh my gosh, I'm sorry, Kenny," Logan panicked as he realized he had just said the blonde girl's name.
"It's okay, Logan. Like you said, it's not your fault. And you know what, I am pretty sure you'll get Camille back... No, I'm not pretty sure, I'm positive." Kendall smiled.
"You think so?"
"I know so."
"Thanks, Kendall. And you know what?"
"What?"
"I know you'll get Jo back as well. You two were meant for each other."
Kendall laughed. "Some people say that we look like we're related. Because of the fuzzy eyebrows, stubborness, the sneaky schemes, all of that."
"Well, you know what they say. Uhhh... what do they say?"
"Opposites attract."
Logan gave Kendall a puzzled look. "Huh? But you and Jo weren't opposites."
"Yeah, but you and Camille are."
"What do you mean?"
"She's out-going and confident. You're a bit shy, you think things through, you're simply more cautious than her. She does things without hesitating," Kendall explained.
"Oh," Logan smiled, "I guess you have a point."
"But you know, Logie, I like that about you. Without your verbal warnings, James, Carlos, and I would probably be in jail by now," Kendall shuddered at the thought, "or dead."
Logan smiled at Kendall. "Thanks, Kendall. Thanks for always being there for me. I could never thank you enough."
Kendall smiled as well.
He turned off the lamp and pulled his blanket all the way to his chin. "Logan, I should be thanking you. You were there for me when my father left, and once again, you've got my back, little brother."
Yet another smile crept into Logan's face. "Good night, Kenny."
"Good night, Logie."
Kendall waited for Logan to fall asleep before letting fresh tears fall from his light green eyes.
As he looked out the window, memories came flying back to him. Memories of him and Jo staying up late at night, lying on his rainbow-colored picnic blanket, and staring up at the stars in silence. He missed those memories, and he missed her.
He knew after some time he would get over his loss, but he would never forget her. She was special. He would wait for her no matter what.
With a smile, he closed his eyes and buried his face into his pillow. He had to get some sleep if he wanted to wake up early to tuck Jo in on the phone. It was a promise he had made, a promise he would keep. Because until he let her go, until they said their next hello face-to-face, it wasn't good-bye.
I suck at romance...
Anyway guys, I'm gonna work on Delusional tonight. I'll hopefully have the next chapter up in the next few days. :) Hope you guys liked this one-shot... Now, I'm gonna resume watching Big Time Break Up on my computer. Buh bye!
~ BigTimeRush-BTR :)