Sehnsucht
Chapter 1: Right now
I don't own Hey Arnold! and reviews are very much appreciated.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A lone 17-year old girl sat on a bench in the park.
The warm evening breeze of mid June went unnoticed as she glanced up at a sky which appeared to have exploded into a million different shades of color. Fiery oranges and purples streaked across the backdrop of soft pink clouds that slowly drifted in the cerulean sky.
Her long blonde hair danced around her face as the gentle wind continued. Her eyes sparkled as blue as a sapphire. Her once trademark unibrow had been put to rest six and a half years ago with the help of her sister. She had changed dramatically once she hit puberty. Her fair legs went on for miles and her perfect hourglass figure was the envy of many girls. Her personality had changed but Helga G. Pataki was no fragile lady. Helga was still as independent as ever and when needed, she could still be quite intimidating.
Faded memories of a 10-year old Arnold incessantly shredded Helga's heart over and over even to this moment. Her eyes softened and her face had a far away dreamy touch to it. Helga still loved him with all her heart and soul. How she wished she would have been able to stay and watch her football headed object of affection grow into a young man. Helga had not seen Arnold since that day up on top of the FTi building, the day they had saved the neighborhood.
The very next day Helga had moved away with Olga. That had been seven years ago, seven long, torturous years without having Arnold in her life. It felt like an eternity to her. Part of Helga wished she had never confessed to him. Although part of her wanted Arnold to kiss her back and admit his love for her.
'But it was expected that he had been confused and absolutely flabbergasted.'
Helga sighed.
A song began to play in her mind. She had lost count how many times she had heard this song. For some reason it always made her cry. For some reason it reminded her of Arnold…
"It's been so long (long, long)that I haven't seen your faceI'm trying be strong (strong)But the strength I have is washing away (way)…"
At first, Helga had a difficult time adjusting to Alaska. Yes, she had always enjoyed the cold. However all her friends and the one person she loved more than anything was thousands of miles away. Helga could understand why Olga made her move away. She just could not handle being so far away from anything and the pure isolation of this part of Alaska.
Her sister thought it best to get her baby sister out of their parents' house. Helga was never really acknowledged by her parents. So after many attempts to get them to notice and care for their youngest daughter, Olga took it upon herself to raise and nurture the severely deprived child. Her parents barely even noticed her departure with Olga.
Olga had noted that Helga had become depressed and withdrawn. Often spending days holed up in her room writing or sleeping, doing little else. Finally after a month of Helga's strange behavior, Olga confronted her sister about it.
*Flashback*
"Helga…may I speak with you for a moment?" Olga whispered through Helga's door.
"I'm not in the mood. Please, just leave me alone." A bleary-eyed Helga responded.
"Helga, I have had enough of this, this foolish behavior from you. Open this door and talk to me." Olga insisted.
"Leave me alone." Helga was in the middle of writing a letter to Phoebe at her small desk.
The door opened revealing a very frustrated and close to tears Olga.
"What is the matter?!" Olga all but yelled.
"Nothing!! Can't I be left alone in peace already? Criminey!!" She cried, getting up to pace around the room.
"Helga, I know something is bothering you." Olga looked worriedly at her sister.
"What is this, an inquisition?!" Helga shouted and scowled.
"I just want to know what's bothering you, baby sister." Olga calmed herself.
"Look, Olga…what do you care anyways?" Helga crossed her arms in defiance.
"I really care-" Helga interrupted.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah you care, Ms. Mary Sunshine. Big deal." Helga's scowl deepened if possible.
"Why are you so angry?" Olga questioned.
"I can be angry if I want to be. Sheesh." Helga punched her pillow.
"Helga, I know some things are bothering you…" Olga began.
"What's your point?" Helga was feeling worn out.
"My point is that you can come to me if you need my help or advice. I know our parents were never there for you but I'm trying to be here for you. It was my entire fault you turned out this way in the first place. I know you aren't happy, and I'm sorry. I was just trying to look out for you, but I messed up. I put on an act so they wouldn't put you through all the stuff they made me do. I never wanted to be the perfect daughter. In the beginning, I just wanted them to be proud of me and pay attention so I did everything they wanted me to do. I'm sorry that it all got out of hand. Nevertheless I did it all so you could have freedom from them. I never imagined that they would totally neglect you. That is the reason you are out here now, Helga. I wanted to right what I did so wrong. Even though it is away from all your friends..." Olga explained.
"Yeah…thanks a lot." Helga dismissively kicked a scrunched up piece of paper by the trashcan.
"…and…Arnold." Olga casually peered at Helga.
"Huh?" Helga stared wide eyed for a moment before regaining her indifferent composure.
"I mean…how is he of any significance in this? Like I care. Che, I don't see what your point is…bringing up that football headed little freak." Helga proceeded to flop down on her bed.
"I know you know what I am so discreetly implying, dear baby sister." Olga smirked at Helga.
'And here I thought your head was just filled with air…' Helga reflected.
'Should I tell her about Arnold? But really who would she tell anyways. I'm certain she knows about him.' Helga pondered.
After twenty more minutes of arguing, Helga decides to tell her at last.
"I just miss them, ok?!" Helga sighed heavily, her walls finally broken down.
"Helga, I know it must be hard for you…" Olga walked over to her sister and hugged her.
"You don't understand, Olga I miss Phoebe so much. I miss…Arnold so much!" Helga pushed her sister back, finding the corner of the room very interesting.
"Arnold?" Olga looked at her sister, feigning confusion.
"I never told you about him because I was scared you'd…laugh at me or something."
Helga continued to rant, looking everywhere but at Olga.
"Oh Helga, I would never do that." She laid her hand her sister's shoulder.
After a few minutes of silence, Helga decided to bare her soul…
"I-I'll tell you everything…you need to know." Helga sighed, feeling relieved about getting it all off her chest.
"And if you ever tell anyone I swear I'll rip out your tongue and strangle you with it." Helga frowned.
"I'm listening." Olga smiled at Helga.
Olga sat down on Helga's bed.
"It all started on my first day of Preschool…" Helga sighed.
*End Flashback*
Helga had ended up spilling everything to Olga, well almost everything. She still had a handful of secrets she'd never reveal. Those moments shared on top of the FTi building with her beloved for instance, was something only Arnold and she had any knowledge of.
'It was the heat of the moment...psh, yeah right. That was certainly not the case for me.'
Helga contemplated.
After Helga's breakdown that day, she had grown very close to her only sister.
Helga had just moved back to Hillwood after seven years of living with her sister, Olga. Her moving to Alaska, of course, had not been her idea. It had not been the best place to raise her sister but Olga thought she had done a decent job, after all Helga had not turned into a delinquent or high school drop out.
In fact Helga had excelled in her classes, especially English. She utterly loved English class. Since there was not much to do in Alaska, she had spent most of her time studying and writing poetry. Sure she had made a few friends, but she never forgot about the ones she left in Hillwood. Helga wrote and emailed Phoebe as often as she could. They remained the best of friends.
"It won't be long (long)before I get you by my sideAnd just hold you, tease you, squeeze youTell you what's been on my mind"
Now, one week after having returned Helga and her sister have a wonderful apartment. No surprise it was up the way from Arnold. Her sister had finished her doctorate studies and had been offered a job at the local university as a professor in Human Studies in Hillwood. Olga jumped at this opportunity, not only for herself but for Helga as well. It had been long overdue for both of them to return to their hometown.
It had been a long day for Helga. She had been interviewed at numerous places. As she strolled back to the apartment she decided to stop by the park for a bit. Immediately, she recognized the tree and bench where she and Arnold had shared many moments. From the time their egg had hatched for their project to Lila essentially "dumping" poor Arnold and Helga had fallen out of the tree in fourth grade.
She decided to climb a few trees before she headed home; after all she had changed out of her interview clothes and heels and into a track suit and sneakers. No need to ruin a perfectly good outfit. The bag of clothing sat at her feet, forgotten for now.
'What a year that had been…I never thought I'd actually confess to him.'
Helga's face turned a bit pink and she shook her head embarrassedly.
'Geez, he must have thought I was crazy as a loon. I wonder how he's been. Phoebe never sent me a picture of him. All she ever said was "you'll have to see for your self." Damnit, she just loves to tease me with that fact. I'll probably have a heart attack when I see the hair boy.'
'I bet no one would even recognize me.' Helga leered.
Helga began to wonder how much Arnold had changed.
'I wonder if he ever got rid of that little blue hat. Damn him and his sultriness. He's probably one smooth cat with the ladies."
Helga's face fell. She got down from the tree.
'He's probably got Li-la as a girlfriend or something.'
Helga shook her head.
"I need move on from him, I'm probably just a lost cause. Some hopeless romantic I am."
Her voice cracked from not being used for a few hours.
"Maybe I'll give Phoebe a call when I get home." Helga smiled, got up from the bench and picked up her bag; headed in the direction of the apartment.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is my first Hey Arnold! Fanfic. I hope you enjoyed it, please let me know what you think of it.
Yes, Olga knows about Helga's feelings toward Arnold. Really, who doesn't though? Helga isn't exactly diplomatic about it. Poor girl.
To clarify things, Olga and Helga's parents are still married and living in Hillwood.
The song is called "Right now" by Akon. I am not usually into hip-hop but his voice is an excellent exception. This song is forever stuck in my head.
Later!
A.n.E