She could tell by the gray light streaming in through the crack in the curtains that snow would begin to fall before the day was through. A bitter breeze blew through the broken window, ruffling the dingy white window shade that had hung haphazardly over the same window the day they'd moved into the crappy two bedroom apartment. The cool temperature penetrated the thick layer of blankets that had barely kept her warm throughout the night causing her to shiver. That's when she heard it, loud voices hurling down the hallway. The same voices that had pulled her from unconsciousness back to reality, or in this case her own personal hell.
With a soft groan she threw the blankets off and slowly climbed out of bed, tugging on the sleeves of the sweatshirt she'd slept in. His sweatshirt. She slipped on a pair of heavy socks and her Timberland boots before allowing herself to stretch. Her back cracked and a yawn forced itself out of her throat. Another gust of winter air whipped around her stirring up a recently familiar scent of stale cigarettes and Irish Spring soap, a small smile curled the corner of her lips as she breathed it in.
He was unnerving to say the least with those steely blue eyes that seemed to see right through her, seemed to know all her darkest secrets without her having to speak them. But, like most adolescent boys, he was trouble and yet she just couldn't seem to stay away from him. It had been that way since he first stepped foot inside Degrassi Community School.
Trying desperately to shake the thought and his memory away, she slid open what was left of her bedroom window and climbed outside onto the fire escape. The icy chill bit at her cheeks but she ignored it, sliding down the brick wall until she was sitting on the cold, rickety metal. Five stories below her she could see the shards of broken glass gleaming in the pale light. Her mom's boyfriend of the week had gone insane accusing her of stealing cash from his wallet, like she was really that stupid. He'd picked the first thing his hands had landed on, her portable CD player, and launched it at her. Luckily he'd missed, breaking her bedroom window instead of her nose. Now she'd have to find someway to come up with the cash not only to replace the mangled piece of electronics that lay in clumps on the asphalt below but also the gaping hole where her window used to be.
"Happy Holidays," she muttered sarcastically, pulling the hood of the sweatshirt up to help alleviate the cold.
"Talking to yourself?" a familiar voice responded jerking her attention away from her own misery.
Her deep brown eyes met his baby blues in disbelief. She hadn't heard him coming which was strange since the aged metal groaned at any added weight, but sure enough there he was as if he'd magically materialized out of some deep desire she refused to allow herself to admit to.
"What do you want?" she feebly demanded.
He simply let out a burst of air that slightly resembled a laugh and sat down across from her, his back pressed against the railings. They groaned in protest but surprisingly held sturdy.
She leaned her head back against the more reliable wall and closed her eyes, tilting her head up towards the sunless sky. She could feel him watching, gauging her mood, trying to figure out what she was thinking. She could see him perfectly behind her closed eyelids, the line of his jaw, the smug smile that dented his cheeks. She hated him, hated him to a point where it had morphed into something else, something that scared the **** out of her.
"What?" she snapped when his stare began to scorch her skin.
His dimples widened, his eyes flashing with laughter. "Aren't you cold?" he chuckled.
Her teeth chattered despite the clench she had on them and she simply shook her head no. Against her will, her arms wrapped around herself and she shivered.
"Right." he replied, a visible cloud of breath chasing his words out.
She turned to him, finally setting her eyes back on his face but being careful to avoid those eyes. She had too many secrets and she didn't feel like sharing them with a near stranger. Concentrating instead on his lips she asked, "What are you doing here?" This time her voice was firmer, holding a little more of her usual bit then it had before.
His smirk eased into a smile, "I was on my way home thought I'd stop by and see if you wanted to grab some breakfast."
"Just headed home," she returned in surprise. She tried to recover but it was too late. The smirk was back, laughter dancing across every feature of his face.
"I crashed at Amy's after the party last night."
His words caused a wave of disappointment to surge through her blood stream. It was a feeling she'd never felt before although she'd been disappointed plenty in her life.
"You should have stayed," he added at the sudden change in her demeanor.
She shrugged in response, moving her eyes from his face to the identical brick building behind him. "I had things to take care of," she replied dully.
"Nothing happened."
"It's none of my business," she sighed.
"You're right, it's not. But just so you know, nothing happened."
She offered him a weak smile once again, leaning back against the building supporting her.
"So," he questioned. "You up for breakfast?"
Looking over her shoulder, she strained to see if the fight was still going on inside the apartment. She could faintly hear the raised voices drifting through the opened window. With a nod in his direction she stood up and lead the way down the groaning steps to the ground below.
[B]-0-0- [/B]
The Dot was crowded with holiday shoppers, Christmas looming less than two weeks away, but they managed to find an empty table towards the back. They slid into opposite sides of the vinyl booth neither speaking as they scanned their menus and gave their orders to the waiter.
An awkward silence still loomed over them as the waiter walked away. Her eyes roamed the growing crowd but didn't recognize anyone. All the people she knew were probably still in bed sleeping off last night's party.
"You jetted off pretty quickly last night," he hedged, pulling her attention back to the table and him. "Something I did?"
She chewed her bottom lip debating an answer. How much was she willing to tell this boy who'd appeared out of nowhere immediately putting her on edge?
"Family issues." she replied safely.
"Family issues?" he questioned eyebrow arched up underneath the band of his baseball cap. "Is that how your window got broke?"
"I got pissed," she added resolutely.
His stare narrowed in on her, forcing her to look at him. "Or," he suggested, "Your mom got pissed."
She could feel her face redden in anger, feel the blood surge through her veins. Her jaw tightened as she bit back, "You don't know **** about my life, about my family."
"Whoa," he added, holding his hands up in surrender. "I just thought…"
"That my mom and I got into a fight and she broke my window," she interrupted angrily. "Well your wrong."
"Okay, okay," he offered. "I take it back. You got pissed and threw something at the window. I got it."
She leaned back against the seat, wishing it would open up and swallow her whole. She hadn't meant to cause a scene but she could feel several sets of eyes looking their way. The waiter returned with their sodas, breaking the tension, and she relaxed a little as she took a drink.
"So, you got plans for the holidays?" he asked, cautiously changing the subject.
She shook her head. Holidays at her house usually meant emergency room visits or nights alone with bad television and a carton of eggnog.
"Yeah, me neither. Mom's pulling a double and the old man will probably be on a binger at the local pub."
"Your mom seems nice," she offered, allowing her eyes to drift up and met his.
He shrugged, "She's alright. That guy at your place the other day, was that…"
"My mom's boyfriend," she explained, stiffening at the mention of Jonas and the reminder of last nights blow up.
"He seemed…interesting."
"For a squatter? My mom doesn't have the best judgment when it comes to guys. Actually she doesn't have the best judgment period."
"Sounds like you're her number one fan." Jay joked, picking up his own drink and taking a gulp of the sugary liquid.
"She's my mom, I'm kind of stuck with her. Although she's not so bad when there's not a guy around. When she's single we have a blast."
"What about you?" he asked.
"What about me?"
"Are you any fun when there's a guy around?"
She shook her head rolling her eyes. "Is that the best you got?" she questioned.
"Actually," he started, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a box wrapped in green paper, a red bow stuck haphazardly on top. He sat it down on the table and slid it over to her. "Open it," he instructed a goofy grin lighting up his face.
She fingered the wrapping uneasily. Small shows of affection just weren't her thing and she wasn't completely sure how to react.
"What are you waiting for?" he asked impatiently.
She picked up the present, turning it over in her hand before beginning to peel back the paper. Underneath the Christmas wrapping was a long white box that she opened cautiously. Inside the box were two tickets to an up coming concert in the park, a concert she knew first hand were sold out. Her and Amy had tried a million different ways to get tickets but had come up empty handed. Her jaw dropped in surprise.
"Wow," she breathed pulling the tickets free from the box and rubbing a finger over the thin paper. "How did you score these?"
"A friend of a friend," he replied with a sheepish grin, "Doesn't really matter. So you'll go with me, to the concert I mean?"
She bit her lip contemplating the invitation, the expensive gift she held in her hands. "Yeah," she replied finally. "I'll go."
-0-0-
"Oh, my God, you bitch!" Amy cried teasingly grabbing the tickets from her hands. "I can't believe you scored them."
"I didn't," she insisted, collapsing onto the twin mattress that took up more than half of Amy's bedroom. "They're a gift from Jay."
Amy's brow arched in surprise. "Pretty expensive gift," she insisted, handing the tickets back over. "Wonder where he got the cash?"
Alex shrugged, slipping the tickets back into the back pocket of her jeans. "He said he got them from a friend."
"Right," Amy added sarcastically, turning back to the mirror she'd been staring into when Alex had first arrived. She picked up her eyeliner and began to apply it to her left eye. "He has the same friends we have, Lex. Do you really think any of them would just hand over tickets like that? I mean, it's the concert of the century. The tickets were sold out the first hour."
Alex narrowed her eyes at her best friend. "You think he stole the tickets?" she asked curiously.
"No," Amy replied flatly, turning back around to face Alex. "I think he stole the money to pay for the tickets."
Stolen money brought back the argument from the night before and the broken window, realization sunk in with a heavy thud as she hopped off the bed and grabbed her jacket. "I've got to go," she tossed out as explanation then fled from the room.
"Hey, where are you going?" Amy called after her in surprise, but it was too late. The front door shut on her question and Alex was gone. With a shrug, she turned back to the mirror and finished applying her makeup.
-0-0-
"Where did you get the tickets?" she demanded when he opened the front door.
His face fell in surprise at her anger and unintentionally took a step back. "I told you, from a friend." he explained, forehead creased in confusion.
She stepped into the darkened living room, crossing her arms over her chest in inquisition. "I find it really hard to believe that anyone would just hand over the tickets."
"Well, I had to pay for them." he added, shutting the door behind her and moving further into the living room, turning on lights as he went.
"Okay, so where did you get the money?" she pressed her anger growing stronger every second.
"Does it matter?"
Grinding her teeth she shot him a look that said it did.
"Okay, fine," he sighs sinking down onto the old, faded couch. "I stole it. Is that what you want to hear?"
"You stole it from my mom's boyfriend," she reiterated. "And now I have a broken window and a shattered CD player. Thanks so much but I think I'll pass on be your date."
He stood up, his own anger surging through his blood stream, not at the raven haired goddess before him but at the asshole that had smashed her window in a fit of anger.
"I thought you broke the window." he bit out through clenched teeth.
She snorted in disgust. "No, you thought my mom broke the window." she tossed back, pulling the tickets from her pocket and tossing them at Jay. "Do me a favor and stay the hell away from me."
The door slammed shut behind her and Jay slunk back down onto the couch, sinking into the cushions. The tickets lay discarded on the floor by his feet.
-0-0-
"I told you I didn't take the money," Alex insisted stabbing the charred meatloaf with her fork.
"Lexie, baby, we just want to know the truth." Her mom pressed.
"No," she replied bitterly. "You want me to admit I did something I didn't do."
Jonas's fist landed heavily on the table causing both females to jump slightly. Anger radiated off him along with the stench of cheap liquor and pot. A low growl tumbled out of his clenched jaw and echoed off the walls. "Look you stupid little *****," he spit out. "I don't give a **** whether or not you stole the money but if it doesn't magically reappear by the end of the week, you will be sorry. And that's a ****ing promise."
The table fell into a sickening silence. She knew it wasn't just a threat. Guys like Jonas meant what they said. She slid her plate away from her and stood up, slowly making her way down the hall and into her bedroom.
The room felt like a walk in freezer and she quickly grabbed the sweatshirt she'd worn earlier and pulled it on, diving underneath the covers despite the early hour. She was on the brink of sleep when a creak outside the window caused the hair on the back of her neck to stick straight up.
Moonlight slipped in as the window shade bent and twisted, a dark shadowy figure crawling past it and into the room. The glow of the alarm clock showed that it was well past midnight and Alex's hand instinctively circled around the baseball bat she kept next to the bed for precautionary reasons.
The shadow tripped over a discarded shoe, the thump vibrating off the paper thin walls followed by a few curses from a familiar voice. Alex sat up, flipping on the bedside lamp and glaring down at the intruder.
"What the hell are you doing here?" she demanded in a hushed whisper.
He groaned, sitting up and rubbing his leg. "I guess I owe you an apology only I'm so good at that," he replied crawling his way over towards the bed.
Alex pulled her knees up, wrapping her arms around them as he continued, "I ****ed up and chances are I'll **** up again…probably a lot, but I've never met anyone like you before. You're street smart not to mention you're pretty damn hot and you have a killer body."
"Do you have a point?" she questioned, annoyed by his persistent compliments.
He nodded handing her an envelope.
"I told you I'm not going to the concert." she replied, handing the envelope back.
He rolled his eyes, "I get that you're stubborn but just open it."
Alex sighed, lowering her legs and sitting up straighter. She slid the tab of the envelope out and gapped in surprise at the wad of money inside.
"It's everything I stole," he replied, his eyes downcast for once and not boring into her.
She swallowed around the lump in her throat as she fingered the crisp bills before folding the envelope back up and sitting it beside the alarm clock on her bedside table. "Thanks," she muttered, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear.
He nodded, pulling a small flat package out of his pocket and handing it to her. It was wrapped in the same paper as the tickets had been wrapped in and Alex felt the uneasiness rising back up inside of her.
"Jay…"
"I didn't steal it, don't worry. I had some money put back for this car I've been saving up for. It's not much but…"
Alex took the package from him and slowly pulled the paper away revealing a piece of cardboard that had two hoop earrings stuck in it, they were plain, sterling sliver and perfect.
"Merry Christmas," he whispered, pushing himself away from the bed and back to his feet.
"Yeah," Alex replied with a faint smile. "Merry Christmas."