The last time I saw Jess Mariano was when he showed up at my dorm room at Yale one night, two years ago. It was almost right after my last finale that year, and Dean was over for some sort of a dinner, and then he just… came. It was the last thing I expected to happen at that time. Well, that and a piano falling on my head, but lets not get into that. He just showed up, like he always does, shows up. Oh, and that was after I ran into him when he came to Stars Hollow, and he just told me he loved me and left. And that was after he just left town one day, without any notice.
So, he came. It was really late and considering that the dorm halls are dark even by day, it wasn't easy recognizing his face the first few seconds. His hair was a bit longer than usual, and he wore it down like I remember him doing a few times before, when we were just friends, but I didn't recognize who it was. Like I said, I didn't exactly expect for this to happen.
And then he spoke.
That voice. I don't think I'll ever forget his voice. Not that I tend to forget voices, but I think the voice of him, saying 'I love you', will forever be burned into my brain.
He wanted to talk to me, so I asked Dean to leave and listened to him. I didn't want to, really. I was so tired of listening to what he had to say. This guy… he was all words. I could never really trust these words of his, and after all I've gone through, I just couldn't listen to any word he had to say. He asked me to come away with him, telling me I can trust him now. I tried to shut him up, just saying 'no' over and over again, shaking my head, wishing he would just go away. I was afraid of letting myself trust him again. I was afraid of believing things could change. He asked me to only say no if I really don't want to be with him, and I said 'no'. I didn't. I couldn't.
He walked away, and I swear I've never seen him so hurt before. I sat down on one of the boxes I packed earlier, head in my hands. There was a moment where I actually felt sorry for him, for causing him pain. And then I remembered the pain he caused me. A part of me couldn't believe what just happened, while a small part of me somehow knew that it had to come. I sighed, dropped my hands to my sides and glanced around the room which just a minute ago contained more than one person. This was unbelievable.
The things that came next for me were not less unbelievable. From losing my virginity to a married Dean to starting another crazy year at college, Jess pretty much slipped my mind. I was sure I won't ever see him again.
Little did I know.