Disclaimer: Don't own it. Done just for fun... and stress relieve.
No Regret
"Do you regret," Ikkaku once asked, when they were taking a break from training, "of letting her go?"
Renji stared blankly at the third seat over his water bottle. For some reason, his month went very dry.
He still remembered that day (after all, it was not really that long ago), still remembered the exact thoughts that went through his head.
A Kuchiki! Protected by that insanely powerful man… she would have all the things they could never get in a million years! She would stand on top of them all.
He was the one being left behind.
She looked so uncertain then. If he asked her to stay, she would. And things would stay the same. It would be so easy, right? But Renji is never one that shied from difficulty. So he slashed the tie that bound her to him, so that she could fly (away from him).
Did he regret it? For the longest time he felt like he was falling and falling into a deep dark pitch alone and cold while she rise further and further from his sight. It hurt like hell, to have everything familiar pull out of your world. But after a while, the pain is numbed and he thought he is okay. Then there would be time when he returned from missions bursting with things to rant but find no one listening, and time when he spotted something funny but found no one's there to share. Then he knew that things would never be okay, not without her there.
But even then he did not regret.
Regret meant that you wish thing passed were different. But he knew given the chance again, he would still paste on that false smile, snap her on the shoulder and told her in his secret language to move ahead and left him behind. Yes, he would do all these, even with the full knowledge of the pain he would have to endure every single moment for the rest of his life. He would still do what he had done.
"No, I don't regret it." He put his water bottle down and picked Zabimaru up. "That is so retard."
He cut the bond, he let her fly. But who said anything about staying behind?
He was no pansy ass like that.
"Oy! Let's spar!" Renji flashed Ikkaku a grin that promised hours of violent fight.
After all, he was in the eleventh division for a reason.
end.
Author note: it turned out a bit too angst for my liking, hope you like it.