Disclaimer: Don't own Lucifer.

AN: This is based on the more obvious theory that Candy Morningstar is a stripper in Vegas who Lucifer marries. It's a likely scenario, since Lucifer is angry at God for putting Chloe in his path and would want to get back at him. But this is also based on a rumour I heard that Dan's getting a love interest soon. Since I highly doubt it would be Lucifer's mother (gross), this idea came to me.

Dan Espinoza wasn't sure when he accepted the craziness that had become his life.

Maybe it was when he dropped his hostilities towards the eccentric club owner who called himself Lucifer Morningstar. The man was a dick and an asshole, and there was always going to be a rocky relationship between them, but Dan would be lying if he said that Lucifer was a bad person. His sense of justice was sound, and he made both Chloe and Trixie happy. And honestly, a man pretending to be the Devil wasn't the craziest sight in LA, not by a longshot.

He supposed that the hostilities dropped because he no longer saw Lucifer as a threat to his marriage. With the divorce final, Chloe could date whoever she wanted to – and she clearly wanted to date Lucifer, no matter how many times she denied it – so there was no reason to be jealous or threatened.

And with the shift from 'hating Lucifer' to 'still thinking Lucifer is a dick but letting him hang around', Dan found himself accepting it all; the demon former-bartender-turned-bounty-hunter, the moody older brother who was probably adopted and seemed like the sensible one despite believing the craziness as well, and the club owner's crazy belief that he was the actual Devil.

Alright, so Dan didn't actually believe that, but he'd stopped staring whenever the man said something weird. At least most of the time.

Chloe once told him that she put up with Lucifer's craziness because he was her friend and helped her on cases; he made her a better Detective (she also made a bad joke about needing the eggs, but regardless). And because he did help out, it really didn't matter if he was crazy or, Hell, if he actually was the actual Devil.

Words to live by, Dan realized. Because she was right; when the push came the shove, Lucifer really was a good consultant and valuable member of the force. Even if he was a whack job.

He guessed that was the reason why he didn't question anything when he overheard Lucifer and Chloe talking to one another after the club owner's return from Vegas, where he had spontaneously run off to because of Daddy Issues, according to Maze.

"You knew? The whole time? Why didn't you say anything?"

"I didn't want things to change between us, and I was afraid that they would. And honestly, part of me was still coming to terms with it all. I tried dropping hints; I said that I don't believe you're crazy, but I don't believe the whole "Devil" thing, either. But what I meant was I don't believe you're the Devil as he's been portrayed; as the ultimate evil and embodiment of sin. In that sense, I don't believe you're the Devil. However, since you are what those myths are based off of, you're not crazy, either. You obviously missed the punchline of the joke."

"What punchline?"

"The man says his brother is crazy, but the brother is still making eggs, which makes him a chicken regardless of his sanity."

"And in using that joke, you were trying to tell me that…you really believed me…"

Dan just shook his head and moved away. If Chloe wanted to roleplay with her friend, fine. It was better than the yelling match that had taken place when Chloe discovered that Lucifer got married when he was in Vegas.

Speaking of…

The woman he had married – Candy? – was stood by Chloe's desk, looking awkward and uncomfortable. Her legs were long but she honestly wasn't that tall, and her dark brown hair complimented her sea blue eyes. Her clothing was rather tame in comparison to most strippers Dan had seen, but then again Lucifer had insisted she was an ex-stripper, so maybe she was straightening her life out?

Not wanting to seem rude, and realizing that it would probably be a while before Lucifer left Chloe in order to greet his wife, Dan walked over to her to keep her company. "Hey."

She jumped a little and blinked at him. "Oh. Hi. Dan, was it?"

"Yeah. You waiting for Lucifer?" he asked.

"Yeah," she nodded, taking out a ring. "I forgot to bring this to the courthouse yesterday, and he said to just drop it by the precinct."

Dan frowned. That was her wedding ring. And courthouse? "You guys divorced? Already?"

"We annulled the marriage," she explained. "It was my idea. I saw that he still has feelings for Chloe, and I didn't want to get in the way of that. And my reasons for marrying him weren't exactly right; I wanted to escape my life in Vegas, and since he was rich, he seemed like my way out. But it was wrong. We both knew it couldn't last."

"How'd you get it annulled?"

"It was on the grounds of us both being completely drunk at the time. And Lucifer's therapist helped by saying he's not mentally sound, or at least, he's not mentally competent enough to make a decision like this."

It was probably wrong, but Dan was actually…happy about it. For Lucifer and Chloe, of course. Not because the woman before him was available…

He shook himself. He could admit that she was…well, beautiful. He'd avoided going on another date since the whole Charlotte fiasco, and since he'd realized that he probably (read: definitely) still had feelings for Chloe. And the woman looked pretty young anyway, OK maybe not super young, probably somewhere in her late twenties or early thirties…

"I'm…sorry it didn't work out," he finally managed to say. Why couldn't he talk suddenly? She was just a woman. "Err… It's Candy, right?"

"Candy was a stage name," she replied. "I'm thinking about going by Candace again. Candace Mills."

"Candace…" He smiled. "It's a lovely name."

She smiled, and it was like watching the sunrise. "Thanks."

"So…" Damn it, when did talking to a woman become so hard? "Does this mean you're going back to Vegas?"

Her smile faded, and Dan felt like kicking himself for taking away her smile. "I really don't want to, but… I don't have anywhere else to go. Lucifer offered me a job at Lux as a 'no hard feelings' gesture, and it's nothing like the strip club in Vegas which is a plus, but it's a case of finding some place to live."

"I'm looking for a roommate." The words were out of his mouth before he could stop himself. Could he sound any more desperate?

Candace looked surprised – but not unpleasantly. "You are?"

"I need one to help pay the rent," he explained. "Ever since my divorce and demotion, it's been…hard, keeping my place. I've even been digging into my savings. It's a really nice place and I don't wanna lose it, because it's got a room for my daughter whenever she visits…" He was babbling, and shit he was making a fool of himself.

But Candace was smiling again, so maybe it was working. "So, I need a room, and you need a roommate. I'm sure we can work something out."

"Definitely." Was he pulling his goofy grin? He really hoped he wasn't. Maze told him his goofy grin made him look like a psychotic, murderous clown.

Candace pulled out a pen and a sticky pad from her bag, and Dan couldn't believe it, she was actually giving him her number! "I'm staying in a hotel nearby. How about you call me when you get off work, and we can talk about it over drinks?" She pulled off the sticky note and he held out his hand to take it from her…

…but instead of placing it in his hand, she stuck it to his forehead.

Before he could say anything in response she winked, turned on her heel and left.

And then she came running back a few seconds later to drop the wedding ring on Chloe's desk. She stood awkwardly for a moment before confidently making a second exit as if it was her first.

Dan could do nothing but watch her go, and he was definitely sure the goofy grin was plastered across his face.

"Daniel, why do you look like a psychotic, murderous clown?"

Lucifer and Chloe had come up beside him, and nothing either of them could say could pull him from his good mood. "It's, err…"

"And was that Candy?" Lucifer asked, staring after the departing ex-stripper.

"Yep," Dan replied. "But she's going by Candace now. She dropped off the ring." He pointed to the desk.

"Excellent. I think I'll sell it on eBay. It's what she'd want." Lucifer picked up the ring and slipped it in his pocket. His eyes suddenly zeroed in on Dan's forehead. "Hold on, did my ex-wife just give you her number?"

"You guys got an annulment, so she's not your ex anything." Dan peeled the number from his forehead, folded it and slipped it into his pocket.

"Looks like someone's still got it." Chloe gave him a friendly shoulder punch, and Dan was surprised that he felt nothing but platonic feelings for his ex-wife. But the surprise faded fast, and in its wake, he felt nothing but relief.

"No! We shouldn't be encouraging him!" Lucifer protested. "I'm rather disappointed in Candace. She should have much better taste in the opposite sex! I mean, Daniel's not so bad, all things considered; he's got a six-pack going for him, at least. But add in the boring personality and his ranking of ten on the douche-metre-"

Chloe cut him off by slapping his arm.

But honestly, Lucifer could say anything and Dan didn't care. A beautiful woman had given him her number, and he was flying on cloud nine.