Kanda hesitates at the door, his knuckles stark white and suspended in midair, inches from the hard wooden surface. He grits his teeth. Why the Hell am I here?
He abruptly turns and begins storming down the dimly lit hallway in the direction he came from 30 seconds previous, his shoes making muffled thuds against the plush carpeting, before coming to a stop in front of a pair of elevator doors. He reaches up to punch the down button, but finds that he cannot; it was like an invisible shield had propped itself between his fingers and the round piece of plastic, preventing them from approaching any closer. He sighs.
Oh yeah. I've got nowhere to go.
Kanda closes his eyes for a moment and leaned against the wall, his head bumping painfully against it. The dull ringing in his ears helped, a little; he can no longer see the scene that was playing over and over again in his head like a silent movie, pausing indefinitely to show him that, yes, this was where it all went wrong.
As he trudges down the hall once again, Kanda swears he can hear a defeated sound to his footsteps, as if they're mocking him, as if he doesn't know how pathetic this is already. Ba-bump. Ba-bump. You lose. You lose.
"Shut up," He growls, as he faces the door again. He doesn't give himself opportunity to hesitate this time before rapping gently, just once.
Something always brings me back to you
It never takes too long
No matter what I say or do
I still feel you here 'till the moment I'm gone
First there were the lights.
It was like someone had suddenly thrown a black veil over his eyes, the way the darkness hit him. He hated it, hated it to no end, hated it so much that he was suddenly overwhelmed with a desire to get the Hell out.
He didn't. And later, he would wish, he would dream, that he did.
There were hands on his forearms, guiding him backwards through the darkness until the back of his knees hit the edge of something soft and he automatically sat down on what only could have been a bed. The hands removed themselves for a few seconds before coming back, the fingers danced across him in an excitement that wasn't there before.
Then there were his clothes.
The hands moved slowly, agonizingly slowly, and it was at Kanda's irritated mutter of 'Hurry the fuck up' that earned a low chuckle from their owner, that those hands finally picked up a little speed. And yet, as he felt the cool air strike his bare shoulders like a mallet, those fingers still glided with a sureness, a confidence that seemed to take all authority and render the sad little pieces of what was left of Kanda's pride useless.
They now danced a smooth waltz on his pale skin, touching, caressing, exploring, reigniting those feelings that made his world go round. As they moved up to his face he felt himself leanig into the palm, breathing in the cologne, the intoxicating scent he'd grown to love and hate.
Words he could not hear were whispered into his ear, lips coming to claim his own a moment later. Kanda sank backwards into the sheets and let the feeling wash over him as those fingers moved lower.
You hold me without touch
You keep me without chains
I've never wanted anything so much
Than to drown in your love, and not feel your rain
It suddenly occurred to Kanda that the room was too hot.
The initial shiver that shook his frame once everything was gone (the Bastard did take his sweet time, mind you) only lasted a second, maybe less, before he felt himself pulled into a whorlwind of.... what? Pleasure? Pain? A little of both, probably.
The sensation was nothing new, and yet, each and every time, Kanda would be hit with a torrent of tingles when skin had first brushed against skin, sending him spiraling down into perhaps the very pits of Hell and the very gates of Heaven. And Kanda was a man who hated contradictions.
Faster.
Faster.
Faster.
Somewhere in the back of his head, he heard the crying protests of the part of his mind he had purposely locked into a tiny dark room. The only part that still had reason, it seemed. It was now pounding at the metal doors, shrieking at the top of its lungs as if daring Kanda to shut it up. Instead he shoved another pair of doors in its face and muffled the screams with a deafening slam.
Faster.
Faster.
Faster.
Ah, shit. The pounding was back, and this time reason made the point to accentuate every blow with an equally painful one to Kanda's cranium. Kanda pressed a fisted hand against his forehead and bared his teeth.
Faster.
Faster.
Faster...
Something wet trickled from the corner of his eyes, and Kanda prayed it was sweat.
Set me free
Leave me be
I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity
"Stop."
He whispered it, so softly, and half-wished the other man wouldn't hear him. The wish wasn't granted, and reason jeered.
"What?" The mess of brown curls bounced slightly as the shadow of Tyki's head sharply. Kanda closed his eyes.
"I said stop." Reason's voice was cool and collected leaving Kanda's lips, as if it knew how much it belonged. Reason's strength pushed his body up and off the bed, stumbling only momentarily in the dark. Reason's eyes sent a blind glare behind him when he felt a hand on his arm.
"Oh, come on, where are you going?" The other man's voice sounded like an odd combination of silk and caramel, and Kanda suddenly wondered if he could close his ears.
"I'm leaving." Was all he could manage. His clothes were hastily pulled on with none of the tender grace with which they were taken off; he fumbled with the buttons of his shirt, although he was unsure why.
Dark fingers came from nowhere to join his own, successfully putting the button through the hole with seemingly little effort. "If I had a quarter for every time I've heard you say that," Kanda kept his mouth shut, clenching his muscles to stop the shivers. "You know you can't live without me."
"Tch."
"I can and I will, you Bastard." The Japanese man frowned as the words, right on the tip of his tongue, came from the other's mouth instead. "You're so predictable, you know that?"
Here I am
And I stand so tall
Just the way I'm supposed to be
The metal knob was making a dent in Tyki's living room wall as the door flew open. The light here, unlike the ones in the bedroom, was turned on, and it made for a very different experience for Kanda's eyes. He stood there, blinking, for a second before realizing what he was doing.
"Are you sure you want to leave?" It was through sheer willpower that Kanda did not turn his head toward the sound of the voice.
"Yes, you retard." He lifted up his jacket draped over the back of a chair, frowning when he turned out the empty pockets.
"Looking for this?"
Kanda kept his eyes firmly down as he marched toward Tyki, stopping when he was close enough to smell the cologne. He inhaled, deliberately through his mouth, and reached up blindly. "Give it to me."
"Hm." Tyki's nonchalant tone made Kanda want to hit him. He didn't. "I'm not sure if I want to bother. You're going to be back here in a couple of days anyway."
"I said give it to me!" Shouting, Kanda found, was a lot less effective when he couldn't meet the eyes of the man he was shouting at.
"Temper, temper." The Japanese man felt a hand on top of his head, and he slapped it away without thinking. "Tell you what," Tyki continued, "If you can stay away from me for an entire week, then I'll personally deliver this back to you."
"Tch." He turned away from the Portugese man and stormed across the room, grabbing his jacket and slamming the door so hard that his ears rung.
But you're on to me
And all over me
"Five days. Not bad." Says Tyki, after taking a painstakingly long time to open the damned door.
"Shut up." Kanda growls again.
Tyki chuckles. "What'd I tell you? Not one week." Kanda feels himself tense when the other man pulls a hair-tie from his pocket, dangling it in front of his eyes. "Looks like you won't be getting this back after all."
"Fuck you," He reaches out for it, only to have Tyki step back further into the room, yanking it out of his grasp. He pauses halfway through his step forward. "Give it back."
"You'll just have to come get it now, won't you?"
Kanda walks forward, hearing the door click shut behind him just as the cold metal door of his restraint room slams, with reason screaming bloody murder inside.
Something always brings me back to you
It never takes too long