A scowl crossed K's lips. He caressed the pistol in his pocket warily as he barked something to the dressing room behind him, which was emanating loud grunts and growls of anger almost continuously. Schuichi knocked, and reached for the handle, jiggling it so it made a sound. "Suguru? You okay in there? Do I need to help you?"

"I'm…" A snarl and a curse directed at his underwear. "I'm just fine, Shuichi. Damn tighty whities tryin' to…" Another curse word. "Tryin' to choke me in three different places…"

A loud snap. A pause. "Schuichi…? I need a pair of boxers in here…"

[Meanwhile...

Sakano was panicking. Without a doubt, he was panicking. To be exact, he was running around the room, contemplating out loud if a size medium undershirt would fit Hiro or if he needed a size large and whether or not the guitarist would kill him if he asked what waist size he needed. Tohma had tried desperately to calm him, though; his efforts had only produced results about 5 of the time. Sakano had just told his worries to Yuki and Tohma when the younger of the blonde men threw open the door to the tiny dressing room, grabbed measuring tape, and began to go to work. Sakano could feel his heart threaten him with cardiac arrest. Moments later, Yuki stepped out and selected a large shirt, tossing it over the top of the tiny room for Hiroshi. "And hurry up, in there." He growled.

It took Hiro a little over five minutes before he could step out, fully dressed. The tuxedo flowed so well with his body, Yuki reminded himself to ravage Shuichi the second they got home.

"Wow. You look great, Nakano-san." Tohma chuckled as Sakano's face reddened.

Suguru, Shuichi, and K all strode in at that exact moment, the green haired man clad in a slightly smaller version of Hiroshi's clothes. "Which Nakano are you talking to?" Suguru seemed abnormally happy in the last ten seconds.

"Now, now, Suguru. You aren't a Nakano yet. You'll have to wait until tomorrow."

"Ah…" Sakano whimpered. "So…Once you two get married…Will you be Mr. and Mr. Nakano-san?" Hiro's face lifted, while Suguru's soured. He hissed, "What?" Before Hiro patted his arm quietly to silence him, which he grudgingly accepted, crossing his arms and glaring off.

Schuichi gushed over the couple, every few minutes turning to Yuki and begging him to do the same, hold hands, kiss him more often, all the while being completely ignored. Tohma suggested they go to lunch, and was met with no argument.

[12 hours later, 1:28 A.M...

Suguru was poked in the side. Quietly cursing, he snuggled further into Hiro's arms, trying to get back to sleep. The sound of a cocking gun sent him scrambling to his feet to find K and Shuichi standing happily by his bed. (Well, Shuichi was, at least. K seemed to be sulking.) Hiro hiccupped and rolled over, showing his back to the others.

"C'mon." Shuichi whispered. "The bride and groom can't see each other the day of their wedding until you're walking down the aisle!" And, with that, he and K handed Suguru an outfit, which he slipped on quickly, yawning all the way. Hiro woke up slowly, just as they were walking out the door.

"Let me get this straight. The caterer thinks I'm allergic to dairy?"

"For the last time, YES!"

"Well, tell her I'm not!" Shuichi tottered off quietly.

Suguru sat down and put his head in his hands and wondered almost hysterically why nobody had come to him about these problems before hand. Suddenly, a tablecloth was thrown over his head, encasing him in an odd smelling cocoon, and when he started to thrash, he felt a gun at his neck. Obviously, K wasn't quite sure where his head was underneath the sheet. Suguru snarled out a string of curses at the American before Shuichi explained, "Hiro just came in, he can't see you."

"Oh for the love of-" K had found where the synth player's mouth was, after all.

"…Is Suguru under that sheet?" Hiro asked quietly. He could almost hear Shuichi's energetic nod. The guitarist sighed. "May I see him, please?" A shake of the head. A moment of shuffling sounds, and, suddenly, Suguru was picked up. He could hear gunshots and Shuichi's screaming fade until it was silent, and he was set down, the cloth removed. Hiro was giving him an amused look before they kissed quietly. "You left without saying goodbye this morning." He chuckled as Suguru's face filled with guilt. He whispered an apology, and received an easily forgiving kiss.

"C'mon, let's go." He stood, and Suguru took his hand happily.

Shuichi had a fit when he realized that the two had seen each other, and was talking about bad luck for the members of Bad Luck right up until the couple separated to get ready for the ceremony.

[Suguru's Dressing Room, twenty minutes until 'I Do.'...

"Ow…It's too tight, Shuichi, cut it out!" Shuichi giggled nervously and stepped back, ignoring Suguru's mutterings of how he could tie his own shoes.

"…You look nice." Yuki blew smoke out the window as Shuichi whined at his feet. The pink haired man's watch suddenly went off, and he grinned, abuse of his lover ceasing. "Time for the best man to go to the altar to await the lovely bride!" He sang as Suguru chased him out.

[The Altar, five minutes until 'I Do.'...

Hiroshi messed with his hair nervously, glancing at the massive doors just twenty feet of rug away every chance he got. The music began, and his heart exploded as Suguru walked out, arm-in-arm with his father.

[The Reception...

Suguru was still picking the rice that Shuichi had tossed at them on the drive away out of his hair. He couldn't help but wonder why Hiroshi didn't have the same problem, his hair being ten times as long as his own. Yuki, unfortunately, had caught his bouquet, which only made Shuichi gush more than he already did, while Sakano had almost choked on some of the same rice that was now bothering his hair. Suguru needed some punch.

A hand snuck under the bottom of his pants, feeling around his thigh. He screeched, only to find Shuichi sitting there, looking innocent. "What the FUCK are you doing?!" Suguru snarled.

"Gotta get the garter on your leg." Shuichi seemed to shrink as he said this. Suguru thought for a minute, and remembered the cloth that had been tied around his leg earlier. He reached down his own pants, retrieved it, and tossed it at Shuichi before going to look for his husband, who was standing by the stage, talking with Yuki.

Hiro wrapped an arm around Suguru as he talked, squeezing his lover's hand happily.

"Yuuuukiiiiiii…" Well, Shuichi was back.

The blonde, who must have the patience of a saint by now, glanced at him and smirked. "We've been together longer than them and we still haven't married!" Yuki raised an eyebrow at this. "You want to get married?" He muttered.

"Yes! More than anything!" Shuichi whined.

"Then, marry me."

"…"

"…"

"…What?"

"You wanted to get married. Marry me. We can shop for rings right after the reception if over." A resounding thud, and Suguru chuckled. Poor Shuichi. Yuki was going to give him a heart attack one of these days…

The word 'oneshot' means nothing to you people.