"Ohmygodohmygodohmygod." Donna keens to herself, rocking slightly as she watches the attack ad playing on the screen. She feels like she's been punched in the gut. Yes, she briefly considered the possibility that her "secret" could come out if she read the statement. But a part of her figured that after all these years, she was safe. And it had been a chance she'd been willing to take when Lou offered her the opportunity to come to headquarters and play a bigger part in the campaign.
That doesn't make this hurt any less.
It was her body. Her choice. And it should be private.
But now it's not. She can't help but wonder what happens next.
Will Santos ship her back to no man's land? Will her Mother disown her? Will some nut job try to make an example out of her?
Lou picks up the remote and flips the channel. The Ad has already made the news.
"Neither party has commented on a campaign ad that started running today. Last week the Santos campaign called an ad asserting that he was for abortion without limits a distortion. This week the Committee for the Integrity of LIfe unleashed a new ad, revealing that Santos' spokesperson Donna Moss had an abortion when she was 24. The ad suggests that Ms. Moss's abortion is an example of Santos' 'without limits position,' but doesn't provide any details regarding Ms. Moss's circumstances at the time."
It feels like every set of eyes in the room is on her. But there's only one that she cares about. And when she looks up into them and sees how furious he looks, she can't stop herself from running out of the room. She just needs a few minutes to regroup.
Josh has to fight back the instinct to chase after her. Second only to the desire to comfort her is the desire to avenge her. He wants to burn something down. The other side just crossed a line that not one Republican that's met him has ever been brave enough to cross. They just targeted Donna. Someone's going to pay.
While he stands there seething, Edie makes eye contact with Lou. She tilts her head towards Josh as if to say, "you take care of that one. I'll get the other." And then she quietly leaves the room.
As she's walking down the hall, she takes a minute to do the math. How old was Donna when she started working for Josh? She's heard the rumors and she can't help but wonder. Is there any chance it was his? She hopes to God not. This is already a can of worms they shouldn't have to deal with.
She finds Donna at the end of the hall, hugging herself and staring out a window.
"Hey, there." Edie offers quietly, even though she's pretty sure Donna can see her reflection in the window. "How ya doin'?"
"Oh, I've had better days."
"Yeah. I bet."
"But you know what? I've had worse days too."
"Well. That's something, I guess." Edie's not sure what to say. Donna isn't weeping broken heartedly. She doesn't seem to need the comfort Edie came to offer.
Donna turns and looks at her. "I suppose I should rejoin the group. We probably need to strategize. To figure out how much of a liability I am and what to do next."
Edie doesn't know Donna well. She's only been with the campaign a week. Lou told her of possible problems with Josh. Some sort of lover's spat, Lou had suspected even though they both denied it. Edie usually didn't pay much attention to rumors, but there was no denying the tension between the two of them. And she'd never seen Josh look at anyone the way he looks at Donna. Following her with his eyes, a wounded look in them. At first she'd been worried, They need Josh at 100% if they were going to have a chance. If Donna's presence was going to be a distraction, she planned to have Lou do something. But it turned out that Josh had settled down right away. Donna seemed to know the right questions to ask him. And just her presence seemed to bring out the best in him. So Edie had liked Donna for that reason alone.
But now, watching the young woman straighten her shoulders and lift her head, Edie admired her all the more. It was apparent that Donna wasn't going to hide in a corner whimpering. She looked like a woman ready to face a giant.
And Edie made the decision then and there, she'd have her back.
When they reenter the bullpen, they see Lou and Josh in a glass walled conference room. He's pacing, and making wild hand motions.
Edie hears Donna draw a deep breath, then she sees her stride forward. Edie falls into step beside her.
As soon as Donna opens the door, the conversation between Josh and Lou stops. Donna walks in and pulls out a chair. Then she sits, looks between the two of them, and boldly declares, "Well, don't stop on my account."
Lou suddenly cracks a smile, and again, Edie's estimation of Donna skyrockets.
"I really hate to do this to you, Donna, because this is nobody's damn business. But I do have some questions if you are willing."
"Of course. Go ahead."
Lou nods and takes the seat across from Donna. Josh looks torn. Edie widens her eyes at him then nods at the seat next to Lou, as she takes the seat next to Donna.
Once they are all settled, Lou reaches for a pen and a pad of paper.
"First of all, did you have an abortion when you were 24?"
"Yes."
Donna feels like she's being interrogated, and her experience with the Congressional Committee comes flooding back. Only answer the question you were asked. Don't offer any additional information.
"Do you mind telling us the circumstances?"
"No."
There is a short pause, then Lou speaks again.
"No, you won't tell us or no you don't mind?"
She's trying to be careful, but tact isn't her strong suit. And Josh is already a loose cannon. She doesn't usually care about getting on his bad side, but she doesn't want to be fighting this battle on two fronts.
"No, I don't mind telling you." Donna offers, and then pauses for a long moment.
Lou is wondering what to do when Donna finally starts speaking.
"After my Sophomore year I dropped out of college. My boyfriend had just finished medical school. The idea was we'd move in together and I'd support him through residency, then I'd go back to school and he'd support me and I'd finish my degree."
"How'd that go?" Lou asks tersely, already annoyed at the unnamed boyfriend. Josh's mouth has formed a grim line too.
"Dr. Freeride." He mutters, scowling.
And to everyone's amazement, Donna smiles slightly.
"The first couple years were fine. We were in love. We both worked a ton of hours but I loved coming home to him. I loved playing house. I felt grown up. I expected a proposal, but it never came. Then another year passed and we felt more like roommates than a couple. And then one day, when he was almost done with his residency, he came home and said he didn't love me anymore. I asked him if there was someone else. And he claimed there wasn't, but I wasn't really sure. The apartment was in his name and he said he'd like for me to move out as soon as possible. I was a little stunned, but I can't say I was completely shocked. An it hurt, but I wasn't devastated. That's when I realized that I didn't love him anymore either. So I spent a few days packing up my things, trying to figure out what I wanted to do. I'd been hearing Bartlet for America ads on the radio, and suddenly it hit me. I wanted to help him become President! So I drove to New Hampshire to join the campaign."
Lou and Edie are hanging on Donna's story. Neither wants to cut her off and ask any questions, but neither of them really like where this seems to be heading. Edie, especially, is watching Josh across the table. His jaw is clenched and his eyes are blazing.
But then Donna breaks eye contact with Lou and gives Josh a gentle smile. "I tricked Josh into hiring me."
His face softens for a moment. And Edie is dying to ask how that happened. But Donna's has gone back to telling her story.
"I hit the campaign trial with them. It was amazing. But about 8 weeks in, I realized I'd missed two periods. So I took a pregnancy test and I got 2 lines. I felt so stupid. Here I wanted a whole new life, but the old one was suddenly not over. I spent a couple days trying to decide what to do. I knew what my parents would want me to do- get married. So I quit the campaign and I went home."
Edie and Lou both breath small, unnoticeable sighs of relief as they figure out that Donna was already pregnant when she joined the campaign. Under the table, Josh's hands form into fists. His nostrils flare, but he bites his tongue. Donna doesn't take her eyes off Lou, but she seems very aware of Josh's body language.
"The closer I got to home, the more I regretted my decision. By the time, I got to Madison I just told my parents I was there for a visit. The next day I made an appointment at a clinic. And then I met up with my ex. He made a half-hearted proposal. He was a Republican, family values, yada, yada. But he looked relieved when I turned him down. I knew that we didn't love each other anymore. I didn't want to be married to him. And most of all, I didn't want to be pregnant. I wanted to go back to the campaign. I wanted to help Jed Bartlet get elected. Dr. Freeride agreed to take me to the appointment, and he let me recover at his place for a couple days. Then I drove back to New Hampshire."
"The bandage on your ankle?" Josh spits out.
Edie and Lou watch as Donna blushes for the first time in telling her story. When she answers her voice is softer. "A late thaw. I really did slip and fall."
"Not a car accident?" Josh's voice is hard. Edie and Lou look at each other in confusion. But Donna lifts her head and answers him in a strong clear voice.
"No."
He nods his head twice. His lips still a thin line. No one says anything for a minute. Finally, Edie breaks the ice.
"We're the pro-choice party."
"But we can't let that Ad go unanswered." Lou responds. "If nothing else, it's free media. But the question is how to spin it to our advantage."
Donna doesn't say anything. She doesn't want to be in the news at all. She doesn't want to have to explain anything. She doesn't want to be "spun." But most of all, she doesn't want to hurt the campaign.
Finally, Josh stands up. "We need to talk to the Congressman."