Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note, American TV shows, Ben & Jerry's, the city of New York or any of the other things mentioned in this text.
AN: Beta-read by the wonderful letsalldieforslash, thank you for your help in getting rid of the typos and grammar mistakes, and making this somewhat legible. Also thank you for the invaluable moral support and putting up with my seemingly endless troubles with this fic. I wouldn't even be writing near/gevanni in the first place if it wasn't for you, so thanks for that as well. All the remaining glitches are my own.
The Deal
Near is crouched on the floor, lost in thought and unmoving like a statue. The electric train rattles away in circles around him, unnoticed and seemingly uncared for. Near reaches up and sets another dice on top of an intricate model of similar white cubes. He sits down again, one leg hooked under him; the other one bent and drawn up against his chest. He looks so small sitting like this that no-one would know he's almost an adult now instead of the child he still occasionally looks like.
Gevanni suspects that the posture is yet another shield against the world, just like the toys and the train track and the construction site of dice that physically separates the genius from everyone else. Sometimes Gevanni worries for the frail-looking young man's mental health as well; he doesn't appear to have anyone at all to talk to, to laugh with or to tell stories to.
Near lives in the same building as he works in, but Gevanni never sees him eating, drinking or even leaving his kingdom of toys during the day. He starts to suspect that the boy isn't eating properly or even sleeping as much as he'd need to. Sure, he walks Near up the stairs every night and makes sure that the rooms are safe, there's food in the fridge and clean clothes laid out for him on the stool in his bedroom, checks that the door is securely locked, but then he leaves. Frankly, Gevanni has never in his life actually seen Near eat anything proper or even take a nap. Eventually all the worrying is starting to interfere with his work as well, so he decides to do something about the matter.
So on a Monday, after everyone has gone home and Gevanni is once again alone with Near in the office, he makes the offer he's been preparing in his head for days now. Near has finished the dice complex by now, and is holding a set of finger puppets in his hands. He's in his own world, seemingly far away, reliving a memory or planning for the future; it's impossible to tell. Gevanni's offer is heard, however, and as he knew it would, is being considered with utmost suspicion at first, but then with rising curiosity.
And so, as the evening draws to an end and the time to leave is at hand, Near agrees with Gevanni and together they take the stairs into the rooms above their headquarters like they always do. Gevanni walks Near into his rooms, checks that they are safe, that there's food on the fridge and clean clothes laid out for him. He finally locks the door, and then takes off his shoes.
As Near watches his every move from a distance, Gevanni warms up some food from the fridge and sees to it that Near eats at least some of it. Then he flops down onto the couch and turns on the TV, idly surfing through the various channels and settling for a rerun of some American reality show. After a while he starts dozing off, and finally falls asleep on the couch.
In the morning Near wakes him up with a polite hand on his shoulder and a curt good morning. Gevanni takes a quick shower, and then makes them oatmeal for breakfast.
The first few days go much like the first one, with the exception of Gevanni having his clothes and some of his personal possessions transferred to the rooms above the headquarters.
On the fourth day of their arrangement, Near comes to sit on the couch and watch the lousy TV shows with Gevanni. He stays mostly silent, as he always does, but Gevanni can see the rigidness of his stance easing up a little bit. Gevanni laughs at the silly TV show once or twice, which is when Near's attention to the show falters as well, and Gevanni likes to think that he smiles then, but he isn't really sure. When Gevanni's eye lids start to droop, Near bids him goodnight and goes to his bedroom.
Gevanni wakes up from the couch with a crick on his neck the following morning, takes a shower and then makes them breakfast before going to work. Near eats his oatmeal in silence, momentarily glancing at Gevanni through his white fringe and long black lashes, but not breaking the companionable quietness between them.
During the weekend it's Gevanni's turn to play host to Near. As the day turns into evening, he packs some of Near's things into a backpack and takes the young mastermind by the hand. Together they walk through the busy streets of New York to Gevanni's place, which is luckily only a few blocks away from the headquarters. Near is clearly exited at the city noises, the bustle of busy people around them, and all the flashy commercials he sees everywhere. He seems almost disappointed when Gevanni pulls him inside a non-descript door that leads inside the building his flat's in.
Gevanni's place is quite old, but he keeps it clean and the furniture looks very comfortable and cosy. They warm up some frozen pizza from the freezer, all the while Gevanni's profusely apologising for not having anything better to eat. Near tells him he should stop worrying so much, and Gevanni finds that incredibly funny. He's still chuckling at the backwardness of the situation while they're lying on the soft couch after their meal, and not-really-watching TV. Near thinks it's the softest couch he's ever laid on – actually, the only couch Near's ever laid on as he prefers sitting on them – and proves his point by falling fast asleep in the middle of Friends. Gevanni turns the TV off and tucks the small figure in, stroking the soft hair and whispering his good nights quietly, before retreating to his own bedroom across the hall.
Saturday morning they go outside for breakfast. Gevanni insists on buying Near a hotdog with all the dressings after he catches the young man glancing at the stand and finally admitting to never tasting one before. In the end it turns out that he doesn't really like them, but at least now he knows for a fact what they're like. They walk the streets of New York, side by side, but not holding hands like the night before after Near determinately shakes his small hand free of Gevanni's hold, stating that he's very capable of taking care of himself and not a child anymore, thank you. Gevanni barely refrains from rolling his eyes at that, but lets the hand go anyway.
They stop by at a store on their way back to buy some groceries. Gevanni's decided to try and make Near dinner by himself, and wastes no time scouring the shop for supplies. Near is highly impressed by the speed and efficiency of his employee's shopping skills, and soon they are out on the street again, Near with a bemused smile curving his lips and Gevanni, slightly out of breath and arms loaded with brown paper bags.
The lasagne Gevanni makes for dinner is a success. Near eats like he's never seen food in his life, and eventually falls to the couch, claiming to be too full to move a muscle. He holds the small bump of a stomach with both hands, swearing to never eat that much again, not even if Gevanni'd make that lasagne again someday. Gevanni is best pleased, and dumps the dishes to the sink with a half hearted promise to wash them later. They end up in the opposite ends of the couch, their feet amicably battling for space for a moment. The sock-covered feet quickly settle against each other though, getting only slightly tangled in the process.
On Sunday Gevanni takes Near to Central Park. They spend the day feeding the ducks, sitting on benches and eating ice cream. Near insists that they feed the ducks whole grain bread instead of the white one that everyone else is giving them, because it's much healthier. Gevanni doesn't argue with the logic, and watches Near solemnly throw the bits of health bread at the hungry-looking birds instead.
Rester and Halle are getting suspicious by the time the second week rolls in. Near hasn't offered them any explanation to the changed sleeping arrangements though, so Gevanni doesn't elaborate his part of the deal to them either. He just hopes that they take notice of the subtle differences the past week has brought about in their young chief and won't pay so much attention to the insignificant part of it, namely, the sleeping arrangements. Gevanni can see the conclusions their worried co-workers might draw from the little evidence they have, and doesn't even dare to imagine what they'd think if they knew about the weekends as well. They'd be very wrong, of course, but that doesn't stop the sickly feeling spreading downwards from his neck when he fully realises the extent of damage Rester could do to him if he thought he'd be harming Near in any way.
Tuesday and Wednesday pass by unnoticed, until it's Thursday again. Thursday, and Gevanni's decides that what Near really needs, is something to eat that isn't just good for you, but really good. Thursday, and they take a trip to the convenience store down the street. Thursday, and Near spots the Ben & Jerry's they sell there. It's the same flavour he'd had on Sunday, and he'd still been smiling when they'd gotten back to Gevanni's flat that afternoon after he was finished with the small cup. And now he's smiling too, loading Gevanni's arms with Baked Alaska until there's no more of it left in the whole store. Gevanni knows this because Near makes him ask for it. Twice. Near then rushes back to his rooms with what he presumably thinks is a perfectly collected and calm manner, tugging Gevanni behind him impatiently.
Near's already grabbing a spoon and wrestling the lid open as Gevanni stumbles through the door. The blond then wanders to the couch, happily munching the pale ice cream as he goes. Gevanni unpacks the rest of the pints into the tiny freezer in Nears kitchen, wondering to himself weather it really was the ingredients list or just the colour that had gotten the man's attention in the first place. Gevanni takes a spoon himself and tries his best to ignore the happy sighs and the occasional moan that comes from the general direction of the couch.
Thursday is also the first night Gevanni dreams of Near. He blames the ice cream episode earlier that evening for it. In the dream Near is sitting on the couch in Gevanni's place, his back deep in the pillows, his feet drawn up and heels digging into the edge. He's smiling up at Gevanni, white curls of impossibly soft hair spilling on to the pillow and eyes shining with something warm and happy. He remembers holding his hand out to touch Near, to sink his fingers into the shiny hair or trace the smile lighting up his face with his thumb; and then everything blurring, twisting and coming to focus again upon waking up, never quite reaching the boy in the dream.
The next morning Gevanni takes one look at Rester's dark and drawn face and quickly pleads Near to tell them something, to offer some other explanation than the child molester –one that they're obviously decided on. Halle refuses to meet Gevanni's eyes and her mouth is a tight line of disappointment when Near gathers them together for a morning meeting to clear something up as he puts it.
Near doesn't tell the truth, exactly, but he's not precisely lying either. He's balancing on a thin rope made out of half-truths and misleading words that Gevanni really hopes he doesn't fall off on his face. The darkness is lifted from Rester's face, however, as is Halle's disappointment, but they still seem reserved and not really approving of the situation. On the other hand, neither would Gevanni himself be if the tables were turned and the only thing stopping him from attacking the person who's commonly thought of as The One Who Hurt Near would be Near himself telling him he's got the situation under control. Not a chance.
The day draws to its end with Rester and Halle looking worried to leave Near alone with the presumed child molester. Gevanni's reassuring smile doesn't seem to help the least bit, driving Halle nearly to tears and making Rester grit his teeth in frustration. They both say good bye to Near like they'd never see the little genius again, and finally leave as Near bids them a good weekend with his pissed off boss -tone.
He's all smiles and politeness when he turns back to Gevanni though, asking whether they'll take some of the ice cream with them as they go or not. Gevanni takes a deep breath to adjust to the suddenly changed atmosphere, and then decides to just roll with it. He races Near up the stairs and through the corridors to the apartment door; he wins, but only by a thin margin. They're both breathing hard and laughing in between gulps of air when they enter the rooms, so Gevanni pours them two tall glasses of water which they finish off in record time.
Then Near reaches for his backpack, takes two pints of Ben & Jerry's from the freezer and puts them gently on top of neatly folded white pyjamas. Gevanni catches a glimpse of familiar finger puppets as well, but doesn't let his eyes linger on them for too long in the fear of being caught staring. Near always seemed to notice everything.
This time it's Near who takes Gevanni's hand as they walk to the flat in the artificial light of flashy commercials and luminescent streetlights. Gevanni has to release the cool hand as he searches for his keys, and Near is quick to tuck it back deep into his pocket again, out of sight. They reach the apartment door, and Near toes the restricting shoes off the moment they're inside. He insists on not wearing them again for the whole weekend, a thought that Gevanni wholly approves of. He has missed his beloved couch while bunking at Near's, and simply collapses across it as soon as he's free of his coat and shoes. He humms contentedly and closes his eyes to better appreciate the softness of the worn material against his cheek and hands. He can feel the tension leave his body with a deep exhalation; it has been a trying week, especially emotionally.
The last thing he remembers before a wave of exhaustion knocks him down and pulls him under, is a small but insistent body snuggling closer and curling to fit itself against him. Without really thinking, he shifts to better accommodate the person next to him and wraps his arm around the slight figure.
The sun tickles Gevanni's closed eyes the next morning and he curses himself for not remembering to draw the curtains properly. When he opens his eyes, he sees a blond mop of hair unnervingly close to his face. He jerks up and awake, realising belatedly that his hand has been captured in Near's sleepy grip and with the sudden movement, he's also jostled the young man enough to awaken him. Near looks at him over his pyjama-covered shoulder with bleary eyes, then closes them again and, rubbing his face deeper into the pillows, falls miraculously asleep again.
Gevanni has a silent, inner meltdown. Which doesn't mean that it isn't loud inside his head, because it is. His brain screams so loud that he feels numb, his ears burning red for the scalding that he gets from his eerily Rester-sounding conscience. He feels icicles running down his spine and there's an equally cold dread spreading from his chest outwards. He doesn't dare to move in case Near would stir again, so he just lies there, glaring at his arm around the sleeping man, not really feeling attached to it anymore, the traitorous limb.
Eventually the sun reaches Near's face as well, and he rubs his sleepy eyes absently with the heels of his palms. He then turns to Gevanni, who's doing his very best to be one with the back of the couch, to merge into it, to lean as far from Near as physically possible in the tiny space there is between the genius and the couch. He then turns into a blabbering idiot, trying to convince Near that this was not his intention at all when he proposed the deal to Near half a month ago. He proceeds with the determination of a steam train, apologising to his boss and telling him that no, he normally didn't sleep with young boys at all and definitely not like that. He looks at Near with rising terror, crawling his way backwards over the couch, landing eventually with an unmanly scream and a loud thud on the floor behind it.
Near sits up and stares the man from behind the back of the couch in confusion. He then tells Gevanni to please calm down before giving himself a heart attack, which would be very anticlimactic considering that the Kira case has long since been closed. He's eyes are serious and he's speaking in a calm voice, as if trying to talk a suicidal and a bit crazed wild beast out of the ledge of a tall building. He's talking about the deal they made, the offering, all the possible outcomes he'd visualised that day and about this one being the one he'd hoped would eventually take place.
After seeing the blood drain from Gevanni's expressive face he then quickly continues that he'll naturally be very happy to be just Gevanni's friend as the original deal entailed. However, Near also stresses that he isn't even remotely as opposed to the idea of something more happening between them as Gevanni seems to think at the moment. After all, it had been him crawling next to the unsuspecting agent the previous night, not the other way round, as he carefully reminds with a crooked smile.
During Near's little speech Gevanni collects himself from the awkward pile he's landed in on the floor. He sits himself down with his legs drawn up against his chest in an unconscious self-protective gesture. He then listens to the young man, while collecting his thoughts about the something more that Near keeps bringing up. Near has this glimmer of hope in his eyes, and Gevanni takes a moment to effectively smother the raging Rester in his head and to properly think this through before saying anything. He suddenly realises that Near has stopped talking, and is looking at him a bit worriedly. He manages a weak smile, and promises Near to give the idea some serious thought.
Near seems to be happy enough about his decision though, and the blond head disappears behind the couch for a second. Then the head reappears, as the young man wanders off and asks Gevanni about the breakfast on his way to the kitchen table. Gevanni wonders at the sudden normalcy of the situation, and clambers after his boss to make the oatmeal for them.
The day is filled with awkward moments and uncomfortable silences as Gevanni tries to adjust to the changed dynamics of their relationship. That they manage to get through the day without any more breakdowns from Gevanni's part at all, is mostly due to Near's seemingly calm attitude towards the whole thing. He tries not to pressure Gevanni into anything he's uncomfortable with, but at the same time making sure Gevanni catches him staring at him a couple of times during the day, that he brushes his fingers against Gevanni's when giving him the dishes after breakfast and lunch, that he sits a couple inches closer to the man when they're watching the TV on the couch than before, letting their feet brush accidentally against each other. He even thinks about doing the trick with the ice cream again, but soon dismisses the idea as far too obvious and possibly counterproductive.
When the sun finally sets and the fading light makes everything glow in shades of orange, Near takes the finger puppets from his backpack and takes them to the couch. He starts speaking with a low voice and tells Gevanni about Wammy's, about L, about Matt and Mello, and what it was like growing up in the orphanage for extraordinary children. Gevanni has heard the names during the Kira case, and even read short descriptions of them in Near's files, but now he gets to hear about the things you don't read in reports. Near tell him about the pranks he and Matt used to pull on Mello, about the time the children played hide and seek and no-one found Near for hours, about the gardens of Wammy's and the swallows under the eaves. He gets to hear about the loneliness, what it was like to be the best in everything, about Matt's videogames and Mello's chocolate, and the one time Near caught the two boys kissing each other in the kitchen of Whammy's.
In the end Near's voice is nothing but a whisper, when he tells that they are all gone now, and that there is no-one left. That the loneliness is the only thing that has stayed with him. That, and puzzles, of course, he says and tries to lighten the mood with a joke. Gevanni knows that things are bad when that happens, so he collects the other man in his arms and holds him close, telling him how he doesn't have to feel that way anymore, that he's got Gevanni now. He leans back against the soft pillows and starts talking then, about everything and nothing in particular, holding Near close and telling him all the things they're going to do tomorrow, the day after that, and the week after that. He speaks of his plans for the future, of the house in the country he'd like to buy one day and the lake that would be nearby. He tells about the little rowboat he'd have and all the fish he'd catch from the lake. At some point Near's breathing slows down and deepens, and Gevanni stops talking. He kisses the soft white hair and knows deep in his heart that he would never leave this young man, not for anything.
Fin.